Hey everybody! Here is the next chapter! It's kinda longish, sorta. Hopefully you guys like it. Oh, and just to clarify, the war has been over for three years and Katniss has been with Peeta for one year.

14

I was on fire. I could see my sister in one instant. Then there was the explosion.

I was burning to my death. Nobody would be able to save me. Nobody was here. So, I just sat and waited for the darkness to consume me. I heard his voice, and I smiled. He was coming to my rescue. He was going to stop the horrid burning. He whispered my name softly. "Katniss…"

How could I resist something so sweet, something so nice. It was deep and strong. It almost completely engulfed me. But in the very next instant the voice made me sick. It was wrong. It wasn't the voice I knew and loved. It wasn't the voice that I thought I wanted to hear for the rest of my life.

But I still loved hearing him whisper my name. And that scared me.

I woke up, breathing deeply. I stretched out my hand, searching for Peeta who was supposed to be sleeping right next to me. I needed him. When I couldn't find him, I started to hyperventilate. I turned onto my side, scared to see what I would find. I found him sleeping peacefully, just out of reach. I calmed down almost instantly. He had that effect on me. He hadn't woken up from my panic attack, thankfully. I don't like worrying him.

I curled closer to him, basking in his warmth. You love Peeta. I have been saying those three words more and more to myself. They calm me. Peeta shifted in his sleep, wrapping his arm around my waist. I took a deep breath, taking in his scent. He smelt good, like grass and old books and something else that I couldn't quite place.

I was trying to picture his blue eyes when I felt my mind drift to another thought. I was picturing Gale's grey eyes. I frowned at the thought. He has been on my mind for way too long now. He is now even invading my dreams every night. I tried to get myself to thinking about Peeta again, but somehow I always ended up thinking about Gale. You love Peeta.

It wasn't that I doubted that I made the right choice. No, I was positive that Peeta was the right guy for me. That I could never love Gale the way I love him. Gale was just such a big part of me too. I have known him longer, been friends with him longer. And yet, I was so willing to let him go. I pushed him away like it was nothing, and it was nothing to me. But that also worried me. Could I do that again? Could I do that to Peeta?

You love Peeta. I chanted to myself. Hunting today was a bad idea. It was a tainted action. Hunting once relaxed me. It was what I did to escape. Now it only brings back memories about how many people I killed with a bow. It brings back the memories of the days when Gale and I used to hunt. It was like an addiction, though. I think I liked torturing myself, or something.

Sometimes I feel like I lost a piece of me. The fiery side of me. Gale seemed to fuel the fire within me. So many years back, it helped. It helped me win the Hunger Games and later the war. Gale stood beside me the entire time, cheering me on. Keeping me pumped. You love Peeta.

But Peeta was there too. But then a thought escaped the back of my mind. The part where I shove all thoughts that I don't want to think about. Peeta wasn't by your side when he tried to choke you, a soft voice inside my head claimed. I gasped at the thought. He wasn't himself then, I retaliated. Great, now I am arguing with myself. But, it wasn't his fault. It was the Capitols.

Gale's idea had killed my sister, I then thought. Then the little, evil voice in my head replied, You don't know if that's true. And it was right. I didn't know if it was true. I didn't know whose idea it was. I know he would never purposefully hurt my sister. He loved Prim almost as much as I did, but thinking that made it easier to let him go.

Now his mother was here, which means that he will come back. Maybe not to stay permanently, but he will want to visit his mother sometimes. I don't know what I'll do if he comes back, and I think that's what was really bothering me. I'm not good at dealing with people. That was always Peeta's strength. I couldn't keep it from him any longer. I needed him. I needed him to help me.

"Peeta," I whispered.

His eyes opened almost instantly. There was a scared look in them. He must have been having a nightmare. This upset me a bit. I never know when he is having a nightmare, so I can never help him like he always helps me. I can never wake him up and tell him it will be alright.

Sometimes I felt like I wasn't helping in this relationship, like I was dead weight. I constantly wake up screaming into the night and he is the only thing that can calm me down. I swear he loses too much sleep over me. But I can't return the favor. He claims that just seeing my face helps him more than I could ever imagine, but I don't believe him.

Then there are the moments when he has to hold on to the back of a chair, as some horrid vision flies past his eyes. I can't even be in the room for these moments, because Peeta always says that he won't be able to keep control with me there. He says that he just wants to keep me safe, and that just makes me feel even guiltier, because even when he is the one in pain he is still trying to take care of me.

I kissed him softly on the lips, and the fear immediately melted away from his eyes. We lied there, just kissing for a couple of minutes. Butterflies filled my stomach like they always do when he touches me. I momentarily forgot about all my troubles. My hand knotted itself in his blond locks, pulling him closer to me, but no matter how close I was, it was never close enough. His hand touched my stomach where the bare skin was peeking out from under my shirt. Tingles soon covered my entire body.

His hand started drifting up my body, slowly pulling my shirt up. He warm hands felt good on my cool body. He then reached to unhook my bra. I pulled away, feeling the blush rise to my cheeks. He sighed.

I didn't want it to go too far tonight. I wasn't ready for that step in our relationship, even though I knew Peeta was. Thankfully he didn't pressure me about it or make me feel guilty. I knew I loved him totally and that I was going to be with him for the rest of my life, but sex meant children, and I couldn't deal with that. I couldn't deal with being nervous after every time, because of the fact that I could have gotten pregnant. I didn't need and more worries in my life at the moment.

"Not that I don't like this little wake up call, but it's the middle of the night. Is everything ok?" he asked while chuckling a bit, trying to mask the worry in his voice.

I looked deeply into his blue eyes and said, "I couldn't sleep."

He frowned. "Did you have a nightmare?"

I thought about my dream, and nodded.

"What was it about," he then asked.

I didn't say anything at first. I wanted to tell him, but I didn't want to see the pain in his eyes. I considered lying to him and saying that I dreamt of something different, but I wanted him to know. He needed to know. After everything I had put him through when I was still friends with Gale, he deserved to know.

"Gale."

I had closed my eyes. I didn't want to see his face. I couldn't deal with the mix of sadness and anger I knew he would wear.

The tension in the room grew so thick, that I could have probably cut it with a knife. He didn't move or say anything, which I took as a good sign.

It felt like an eternity before he said, "Is that what has been bothering you for the past week."

I couldn't tell if he was angry or not. He, in fact, sounded almost emotionless, but I didn't dare open my eyes. "I saw Hazel in town the other day, and I just haven't been able to push him out of my thoughts since then."

"I know. Haymitch told me that she was back. I was worried because you didn't tell me though," he merely replied.

I had suspected he knew, since he wasn't pressuring me to tell him about what has been on my mind, like I thought he would. "I didn't want to hurt you," I whispered.

"Katniss, look at me." I wasn't a request. It was a demand.

I slowly opened my eyes, and looked into his ice blue ones. He didn't seem angry or sad. He just seemed tired.

After he knew I was paying attention, he slowly said, making every word clear, "Never, and I mean never, keep something hidden from me that is bothering you just because you think it will hurt me. You don't deserve to suffer alone."

I felt the anger bubble up in me. "You don't deserve to suffer at all!" I basically shouted back.

"Katniss, we are a team. We have always been a team. You don't have to go through everything by yourself. Let me help you," he pleaded.

"But aren't you worried about Gale at all?" I cried.

"I'm worried about what Gale coming back would do to you."

He wasn't worried about our relationship at all. Did he really think that we were that strong? He was the real strong one though.

"You are always helping me. Always. And all I have ever done is brought you more stress and pain. I want to be able to help you too!" And there it was. All my worries and insecurities were out in the open.

"Katniss, you do help me-"

"No I don't!" I cut him off. This was an argument that has been occurring more and more often these days, but never have they been this bad. Never have I yelled at him. "I feel like this entire relationship is one-sided. Like I am weak. Like I am bringing you down."

"You are not weak. You know I love you more than anything, and you could never bring me down," he replied calmly.

How could he be so calm? It was frustrating me. I wanted him to yell back. I didn't want him to be mature about it. "I do nothing anymore! I have no one to take care of! No one to be strong for! I feel useless. I want to be the girl on fire!"

"You don't have to be the girl on fire anymore. You have been taking care of people for so long, Katniss. It's your turn to just relax. You deserve to just be happy for at least a few years. Katniss, I love you." he said, quietly.

I didn't want that, though. I have been protecting people for so long now, that since I had nobody to protect anymore, I felt useless.

"You don't love him anymore do you?"

Peeta said these words so quietly, that I almost thought that it was in my head, but I knew they weren't because of the look on his face. I knew this would happen. It's why I have been putting off telling him. I thought back to my dream, and how hearing Gale's voice made me sick. I knew that I didn't love him.

"No."

I couldn't tell if he believed me or not. I felt tears well up into my eyes.

He brush away my tears, and pulled my chin up, so that I was looking at his face again. "Marry me."

"What?" I was so surprised.

"Marry me."

Yeah, I know I said I will move away from all the fluff, but I just couldn't help myself;)

As always, tell me what you think.