Thanks for the reviews. I'm sorry this is late, but as I mentioned when I posted Wait to Turn things have been happening. Anyway, this chapter took a complete turn that even I wasn't expecting. I started writing it one way but then I thought it needs a twist this is what happened. I'm really curious to know what you all think because this is definitely different than what I first had in mind for this chapter.
o
Nine
Guard Down
After the gala I avoided Damon like the plague. This proved to be difficult though when Jenna and Alaric decided to throw a small barbeque which included the Salvatore brothers to announce their engagement and after their announcement Damon offered to throw them an engagement party at his house. Damon then asked Jeremy and I if we would like to co-host the party together and I couldn't exactly decline since my aunt was the other guest of honor. Oh joy.
Since school was resuming in three weeks we decided to throw the party sooner rather than later. This meant we had a lot to do in a very short amount of time and you would think that that would mean that I would have to spend a lot of time with Damon but I brilliantly had come up with separate task lists for Damon and me which meant we didn't have to spend any time together. Unfortunately my brilliant plan became decidedly less brilliant when I realized I couldn't avoid him when I needed to take measurements of the Boarding house for the decorations.
Ugh.
"This house is far too big. Are you sure you want the entire ground floor and the property decorated. It's going to be really expensive." I asked Damon while putting my notebook and tape measure away.
"Elena like I said before expense is not an issue here. You just tell me how much and to whom I need to make the checks out to and we're good." he said walking down the few steps from the library.
"Ok." I conceded knowing I wouldn't be able to sway him.
"Now are you sure you don't want to hire one of those party planners to do all of this stuff. School starts soon right, don't you have to get ready for that? Senior year and all."
"No party planner. Caroline and Bonnie are helping. Caroline is especially excited and if I can get everything ordered today it will all be ready in time for the party."
"Well in that case I'd better come with you. It will be easier and faster if I'm there to write out the checks." Damon said.
Oh crap. That would mean spending the day with Damon, running around doing errands. This was not exactly the way to succeed in avoiding Damon.
"Oh...uh...well..." I stammered trying to think of some plausible excuse why Damon shouldn't come with me.
"Oh hey Elena, I didn't know you were coming over today." Stefan said as he walked into the room.
"Oh, uh but don't you remember you said you'd help me get all of the stuff I need for the engagement party today." I said turning to Stefan pleading with him with my eyes.
He looked at me curiously then smiled. "Oh yeah sorry I forgot. It's a good thing I came back when I did then."
I smiled back at him and mouthed thank you and he nodded his head ever so slightly in response. I turned back to Damon who was looking at me suspiciously. "You're going with Stefan?" Damon questioned, "when did this arrangement happen?"
"Oh well uh…well I uh texted Stefan the other day and uh asked him if he wanted to come with me on some errands so there's no need for you to come. Stefan is coming with me." I answered lying horribly.
"I see," he said looking between Stefan and me then smiled smugly, "well I should still come along. I do have the checkbook. It will save you from having to go back later."
Crap I hadn't thought about that and by the expression on Damon's face, he knew I hadn't either.
"Damon why don't you just give Elena your credit card. It will be simpler and she can get everything done without having to go back." Stefan explained looking kind smug as he looked at his brother.
Ha! Apparently Damon hadn't thought about that either because he shot his brother a murderous look. I turned and smiled at Stefan sweetly for his brilliance and when I turned back to Damon he had pulled out his wallet and was a pulling out what looked like an American Express Black Card.
He held it out for me to take and I walked up to him and reached out for it but he pulled his hand back and took a step towards me and I felt my heart rate speed up at our proximity. "I hope you know what you're doing" he whispered in my year then pulled back and looked down at me with his piercing gaze. He held the card out but I was frozen by his gaze. He smirked at my lack of movement and placed the credit card in my hand. "Have fun."
I continued to stand there frozen until I faintly heard a door close in the background and I snapped out my trance shaking my head.
"If I didn't know any better I would say Damon had just compelled you based on your reaction, but that was all you wasn't it?" Stefan accused with an undreadable expression on his face. "So are you going to tell me why I lied and said we had plans to run errands together today? Not that I don't enjoy spending time with you Elena, but I do like to know what I'm lying for."
"It's nothing and you don't have to come with me. I can handle this all by myself and thanks to you I have Damon's credit card so it should be even easier now. Thanks." I said walking towards the door.
Stefan suddenly appeared in front of me blocking my path and scaring me slightly, "I never said I didn't want to come. I just said I'd like to know why I'm lying to my brother."
I didn't say anything trying to find the right excuse while Stefan continued to study me. "Wow, you like him don't you? That's why you haven't been around and why you didn't want to run these errands with him today."
"No." I responded quickly and he raised his brow, obviously not believing me. "I don't like Damon. I'm actually trying to figure out what to make of him, he's such a contradiction." I say sitting on the bottom step of the staircase and a moment later Stefan sits next to me.
"If anyone can understand the mix of emotions that come when it comes to my brother it would be me." Stefan said nudging my shoulder.
"It's just…he's just like two different people." I say looking at Stefan, "He projects this bad ass I could care less about people façade but then he does something like help Alaric execute the most romantic proposal ever and now throw them an engagement party. He even made my little brother whole again and he protects me. I…I just don't know how to feel about Damon."
"It's easier you know, when you're a vampire to pretend that people don't matter. I mean most of the time, they're your meal ticket so why get attached." Stefan said looking at the floor.
"But he drinks from blood bags now and you're not like that." I counter, "You always have impeccable manners and Damon's always an ass."
"It's not all without a great deal of effort, sitting here with you right now...and I was born in the 19th century, manners were a must." He explained.
"So then what's Damon's excuse for acting like a complete tool? He learned the same manners that you were taught." I argued.
"When you're a vampire, the traits you had as a human become amplified. I'm not saying Damon has always been a jerk, but he has always put up a nonchalant stance I think mainly in large part to protect himself. Our father was never easy with Damon, probably because he was the oldest. Nothing Damon did was ever good enough." Stefan explained, "By contrast I could do no wrong and even when I did do something wrong Damon would cover for me and take the brunt of my fathers anger."
"Damon's first instinct is to protect. Being the jerk I think is just a way to protect himself." Stefan said, "He's followed me for 40 years, making sure I was ok and making sure I didn't hurt anyone. It goes against our nature to want to protect but he does it anyway because it is who he is."
I let Stefan's words sink in for a moment, "You seem to really care about and understand your brother. I don't understand why there's a rift between the two of you." I said watching him closely.
"I do care about Damon, but too much has happened between us now. There is no go going back for us." he said shifting around.
"But you're here, together, that's a start." I said watching as he got up and walked to the other side of the room.
"I don't know why I'm here anymore. I'm just torturing myself. You're…you're obviously not her and whether you admit it or not you have feelings for him and Damon…" he started rattling off clearly getting upset, his face and demeanor quickly changing.
"Stefan I…"
"He killed her did he tell you that?" he spat out turning to me.
"I thought Katherine died in the fire at Fell's Church." I say confused.
"No apparently she escaped before the church was set on fire. I didn't know it until she found me a few decades later." he said appearing to be embroiled in the memory, "Damon wasn't with me at the time and Katherine and I were happy. She loved me. She wanted to be with me. Damon, he wasn't very happy when he saw her. He was jealous that she had chosen me and then one day he just staked her."
I couldn't say anything completely shocked. This explained so much. I glanced at Stefan looked so crazed and upset by the memory and it startled me. I began waking quietly towards the door but he must have heard me because he was in front of me shoving and pinning me against the wall, "He took her away me. I loved her and he took her away from me."
"Stefan." I said looking at his face.
"And now you…you have feelings for him. I can see it. Maybe I should take you away from him, even the score." he said menacingly.
"No...no," I tried saying shaking my head but he just pressed against me tighter. I looked around me trying to find something to use to get away but there was nothing.
"Don't lie to me. I see the way you are with each other. I see the way he looks at you." He said sneering, "If I take you away from him, he'll be devastated just like I was."
"Stefan you...you don't want to hurt me...it's me Elena." I said shaking looking into his eyes, "You promised me Stefan remember, You promised me that you would never hurt me."
"But you don't want me, you want him." He said whispering in my ear.
"No that's not true. I never said I wanted Damon." I argued shaking my head.
"It's written all over your face Elena. Maybe you can't admit it but I see it. You chose him, just like she did." He hissed.
"What are you talking about; I thought you said she chose you?"
"She did until Damon came back and confused her again," Stefan said, "I wanted her but he confused her, tricked her and he took her from me. I thought you were my second chance but you want him. Why couldn't you have just wanted me instead?"
"Stefan, no that's not…" I started to say as he swept my hair back away from my neck and leaned in closer inhaling my scent deeply. I peered down rigidly and saw the dark veins protruding around his eyes. I tried pushing him away but his hold on me was too tight.
"You smell so good." He said breathing me in again, "I…I…I just want one taste." He brought his mouth closer to mine and I turned my head away but he grabbed my face and made me face him. He brought his lips to mine, kissing me but I stood there rigid not responding but it did not deter him, he trailed kisses down my neck and I shut my eyes tight when he reached the spot I knew he was intending for and I braced myself for the bite I knew was coming.
I suddenly felt a gush of wind, then the pressure of Stefan's hold on me disappear and I heard a crash and glass breaking. I opened my eyes to see the blur of Stefan and Damon fighting, crashing into everything.
I quickly ran and grabbed my purse and pulled out the stake, vervain mace and syringe full of vervain Alaric had given me before Damon had rolled into town. I got as close as I could to the two of them and sprayed Stefan in the face with the vervain mace. His hands instantly went up to his face in pain and I hurried and shoved the syringe into his side and squeezed the contents into his body and after a moment he fell to the ground and I fell to the ground as well exhausted.
Damon looked from Stefan to me in shock. "Where the hell did you get those?" he asked after a moment.
"Alaric. He gave them to me before you came into town and said I should carry them with at all times, you know just in case. I just…he took me by surprise so I didn't have time to get them out earlier." I said looking at Stefan laying there and I wondered what the hell had just happened. When I looked up I found Damon watching me with an expression on his face I had never seen before. It was full of worry and sadness.
"I'm ok Damon." I tried to say nonchalantly standing back up smiling, "See not a scratch on me."
"But you almost weren't." He said quietly, "If I hadn't come back right away, he could have…"
"…but he didn't. You came back and I'm ok." I said stepping closer to him putting my hand on his arm, "Thank you for saving me. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you about Stefan. You were right."
"A thank you and an apology and a 'you were right,' wow, I should buy a lottery ticket or this is something that never happens." He said smirking slightly and I smiled. His face softened as he looked at me and then he did the last thing I ever expected. He reached out and pulled me into a tight embrace. It took a moment but I wrapped my arms around his waist and felt relief wash over me and I let out a breath I didn't know I had been holding. I can't be sure but I swear I felt Damon place a kiss on the top of my head and as suddenly as it had started it was over just as fast and he released me and stepped away.
"I should get Stefan downstairs before he wakes up." Damon said turning away from and I nodded my head still slightly off kilter after our hug.
"What's going to happen to him?"
"I don't know Elena. He attacked you Elena, that's not something I can just forget." He said turning back to me defeated and I could see the pain in his eyes, "I…I…I don't know. You should go. You still have all of those errands to run for the engagement party. I'll come by and see you later tonight ok?"
"Yeah sure." I said nodding my head. I grabbed my purse and pulled the front door open but paused and looked back. Damon was crouched over Stefan and I saw him release a big sigh. I couldn't help but think this was somehow all of my fault.
Amazingly enough I managed to get everything that needed to be done for the engagement party finished, but when Jenna had asked me to about everything I had arranged later at dinner, I couldn't recall any of the arrangements that I had made. I tried to pretend that everything was ok during dinner but it was difficult. Alaric kept glancing at me warily throughout dinner and when I volunteered to take care of the dishes he quickly volunteered to help me.
"I'm assuming Damon told you what happened with Stefan earlier based on the concerned looks you kept sending my way throughout dinner." I said turning the water on.
"Sorry about that," he said sheepishly as he put a few glasses on the counter, "but are you ok?"
"Yeah I'm fine, it just shook me up. We were joking around talking and then he just snapped. I just, I wasn't expecting it from Stefan." I said as I rinsed off a dish and handed it to Alaric to put in the dishwasher.
"I'm just glad Damon got there in time. I honestly didn't expect that from Stefan either. Damon has always said that Stefan was a loose cannon but it was hard for me to believe especially after spending time with him." Alaric said and I just nodded my head.
"Hey Jeremy thinks that just because h can draw he can beat me in Pictionary. What do you guys say, you up for it?" Jenna asked smiling as you walked into the kitchen with Jeremy in tow.
"Jenna just face it you don't have a chance." Jeremy said laughing.
"Ooh those sound like fighting words." I said forcing a smile on a smile on my face. "I'm in."
Jenna and Jeremy went into the living room to set up while Alaric and I finished cleaning up in the kitchen.
"You ok?" Alaric asked after they left.
"I will be." I replied nodding my head hoping that was the truth.
"Now are you ready to get beat in Pictionary." I teased Alaric and he just smiled.
We ended our Pictionary battle a couple of hours later with Jeremy and I narrowly defeating Alaric and Jenna, however, he did have to concede that his drawing skills made now difference in this game especially when his sister (me) obviously was not very visual. It was nice to hang out like that with my family, be normal. I don't think that I had had a family night like that since my parents had died, but the events of earlier today continued to weigh heavily on me as trudged up to my room.
I walked into my room without turning the light on and walked to the window and peered out at the moon letting my mind wander.
"Please make sure to remind me ahead of time that family game night is happening so I can be sure to avoid it next time."
I turned and found Damon sitting on my bed against the head board with his feet laid out in front of him, and unlike the usual, I didn't jump. "Not a big fan of family game night, never would have guessed it."
Damon rolled his eyes and I had to bite back a smile, "Hey sassy, you weren't here during the 50's and early 60's when everything was oh so perfect. It was sickening. I had to escape to Europe for a bit of sanity." He said and I could just picture it, "Never thought Ric was one for family game night, you'll have to remind me to tease him about coyote ugly."
"How's Stefan?" I asked tentatively after a moment.
"Still locked up. I gave him a bottle of animal blood but I laced with vervain. It should keep him out of it."
"Why did you do that?" I asked sitting on the end of the bed watching him.
"Because he attacked you Elena. What should I have done, let him get all of strength back to he could go after you again?" he said getting up and crossed the room.
"Damon…"
"I warned you how dangerous he was but you kept on insisting he was fine and I…I…I let myself listen to you and I let my guard down with him. I thought…God how could I be so stupid!" he said hitting his own chest. "I, better than anyone knows how volatile Stefan can be, but I allowed myself to believe that things were different now and I let my guard down. I stopped watching him and he…he could have killed you Elena." he said and he was suddenly in front of me searching my eyes, "He could have killed you."
"But he didn't, you stopped him." I said carefully putting my hand on his shoulder. "You stopped him Damon."
"But I almost didn't. I was going to go to the Grille to get a drink but I thought better of it. What if I hadn't?"
"Damon you have to stop blaming yourself for this. I'm fine. This isn't your fault. Your brother, he's just, well he's just sick. He fooled us all Damon into thinking we were safe with him." I said pulling him down to the bed to sit next to me. "We were just joking around talking and then he started saying things about Katherine."
"Katherine? What did he say?"
"He said she didn't die in the fire at Fell's Church, that she found him later and she told him that she chose him until you came and that you staked her." I said looking at him and I knew it was true by the anguish clearly written all over his face, "You killed Katherine."
He stood up again and walked to the window looking out, his stance rigid and defeated like I had never seen it. "Yes." he said so simply and quietly that I almost missed it. Then he turned back to me and his eyes met mine and in them I could see the past haunting him. "I killed her but it wasn't that simple."
"What happened?"
"It's complicated Elena." he said and I could see him start to put his walls back up again and I shook my head walking up to him.
"No you don't get to tell me it's complicated and think that's ok. My entire life is complicated Damon. Nothing you tell me about Katherine, my doppelganger will make it any less complicated." I said forcefully.
He sighed before motioning for me to sit on the bed again and he followed suit, "When I came home on leave from the war, Katherine was already there. I was instantly taken with her, she had a fire and charm that was unmistakable and irresistible. I noticed early on that she and Stefan were quite close, but when I asked Stefan about his intentions he told me he wasn't interested, they were just friends so I began to court her myself. She and Stefan had of course been involved already; however, she compelled him to keep it a secret. If I had known I never would have gotten involved with her." he said and I looked at him pointedly and he smirked, "Ok well maybe I would have."
"Katherine was more than happy with my advances and she was soon in my bed. This was 1864 so the fact that a lady would do that with me meant only one thing to me at the time – we had to marry. I proposed and she laughed at me and told me marriage wasn't necessary and then she revealed who she really was." he said before looking back at me, "All my life I never felt like I belonged and I found myself more intrigued by the thought of a vampire than afraid of it. She never had to compel me, nor did she trick me into drinking her blood, becoming a vampire and spending all of eternity with Katherine like she promised sounded more amazing than anything else in the world and I stupidly believed everything that came out of her mouth."
He stood up again and walked over to the window looking out, his eyes focused on a memory. "My father approached Stefan and I about the existence of vampires and he warned us about what they were planning on doing. Afterwards I encountered Katherine and Stefan speaking about it, it was the first time that I was aware that they were involved and that he knew her secrets. I felt betrayed and I was beyond angry. She had played us both so well. Stefan he wanted to go to our father to make him understand that vampires weren't dangerous, but Katherine and I, well at least I thought we had convinced him otherwise. That night Katherine came to me, I wanted nothing to do with her, I was so angry about her deception and her relationship with Stefan. It was the first time she ever had to compel me. She made me drink her blood because she was worried that something bad was coming and it did. Stefan had gone to our father and even though he didn't tell him about Katherine exactly he told him enough to raise suspicion and father laced his drink with vervain and well you know that part." he aid looking back at me with a sadness in his eyes. "Stefan he was desperate to save her. I on the other hand, still angry didn't care, but when Stefan went off by himself to find her I followed. He was my little brother and no matter what I had to keep him safe. As he was attempting to free her I noticed someone pointing a gun at him and before he could shoot Stefan I threw myself in front of him and I was shot instead but they still got him. My last human memory is seeing my little brother fall to the ground, blood soaking his shirt."
I felt tears form in my eyes but I wiped them away quickly, entranced my Damon's story. "When I woke up we were near the falls with Emily. I no longer had any intention of becoming a vampire and I waited to die, but Stefan he came back one night and he brought a girl and I could see the change right away. He was a vampire and he wanted me to feed so I could stay with him. I didn't want to but my job my entire life was to protect my little brother. How could I just leave him alone like that, so I made the worst mistake of my entire existence." he explained sadly, "Stefan, he was so different after that transition. He craved, needed blood, he didn't know how to control it. I guess the teenage hormones carried with him when he turned. After awhile I couldn't stand it anymore and I left, when I came back around a few years later Katherine was with him. I was surprised but not surprised that she was still playing her same games. She said she wanted us both and now we could spend for all of eternity together, just the three of us. I resisted at first but Katherine she had a way of getting into your head and one night I couldn't resist anymore and Stefan caught us. He was furious and I was furious especially with Katherine who looked satisfied. I couldn't do it anymore and I brought her someone that I had fed vervain then stabbed her right in the heart. I killed the woman I loved. I killed that manipulative bitch."
"You killed her to protect your brother." I said walking up behind him.
"Of course you would get it, Stefan never quite understood that." he said shaking his head, "He won't ever forgive me for it."
"You did the right thing Damon." I said softly.
"Maybe." he said peering down at me with his crystal blue eyes, "He wanted to hurt you tonight to get back at me didn't he?"
"I…I…yes I think that's what he said." I admitted looking into his eyes.
"He's right, it would have hurt me. If you had gotten hurt…" Damon started to say softly his hand coming up to stroke my hair, there was so much emotion in his eyes that I had never seen before, "I…I…don't know if I could have survived it."
A tear rolled down my face and I did the only thing I could think of to do, I placed my hand behind Damon's neck and pulled him close until our lips touched and the rest of the world melted away.
A/N: Please please review!