Hey everyone, here is the fourth chapter. This one will be kinda depressing for poor Kyou. It is going to be set still during the curse, while Kyou thought he would be locked away. The story will focus mainly on his daydreams of being able to have a family and a normal life with the girl he loves. The life that he can "never have."
This story is going to be themed to the song "Just My Imagination." I hope everyone enjoys the piece even though it will be sad in the end.
Just as a heads up, because it alternates so much depending on which translation of the manga you read, I'm not entirely sure which is the correct spelling of Kyou's surname. So I may go back and forth between Shoma, Sohma and Soma once in a while. I apologize if this bothers anyone, it's kind of a bad habit that I have gotten into and can't break myself out of. Well, please enjoy the story anyway.
Kyou Sohma walks into the welcoming foyer of his cozy home to see his young fiancee setting the table with a gentle smile on her face. Her eyes light up when her gaze falls upon him and she makes her way toward him to give him a tender kiss on the cheek. He looks forward to seeing her in her white satin wedding dress as he stands at the end of the isle in the church tomorrow.
They'd been planning this wedding for the past year and trying to make everything comfortable and lovely for themselves and their guests. Kyou considered himself lucky that Tohru never once turned into bridezilla, forcing every detail to be perfect down to making sure the flowers in each bouquet were arranged just so or each centerpiece was aligned and laid out perfectly. He was so glad that she wasn't the kind of girl who was obsessed with making everything appear perfect as if putting on some kind of unnecessary performance for the guests. He imagined that she would be the most radiant bride tomorrow not because she was trying hard to keep up some kind of facade to impress anyone, but because it would truly be the happiest day of her life.
The way he looks at it, if your feelings are real then nothing about the day should be fake. He feels, in a way, that by trying to push an agenda or put on a show in one of the most important and defining moments in your life that you are misrepresenting yourself and your entire wedding as something that just isn't real. Weddings aren't about impressing anyone, they are about family and friends coming together to cherish one another and cheer on the happy couple.
He could imagine various friends and family commenting on how happy he looked or what a beautiful ceremony it was or how they belong together. He could just imagine listening as the giggling bridesmaids told Tohru tales of how cute their children would be or wondered what married life would be like themselves. The happiest day of his life was coming up in just 24 hours.
This is the life that he's yearned for. He, Kyou Sohma was the cat of the zodiac and as such, was never allowed anything, least of all to fall in love. But once the curse had been lifted he and his girlfriend got settled down together and made a home for themselves. The life he thought he could never have: To have his own home and a fiancee, to one day have children and grandchildren to have a boat to take out on the lake or invite guests to a family event. But more than anything else, just to have her in his life. As long as he has Tohru, all those other things are one the back burner. They'll all happen with the passage of time.
They eat together happily, speaking about each of their days and expressing their anxious feelings toward the following day. After ward they wash all the sloppy dishes and head off to sleep, holding tightly to one another. The image of them clinging to one another perfectly fits the way they both feel about the events of days to come.
The following morning is filled with the usual wedding chaos. Guests who were either going to be relatively late or were not able to come are calling every few minutes with their long and involved personal stories. Tohru has left the house, not wanting Kyou to see her wearing her gown until the wedding and insisting that it would be bad luck for their marriage if he would happen to. One of her friends most likely put that silly idea into her head. He had been in a rush to help get things set up with the people preparing their reception meal and entertainment, get his tux and be certain it fit okay. He then welcomes the best man and his two groomsmen into his humble abode, to be sure that they all knew the little details. Overall, it isn't anything thing that would be mindbogglingly irritating. Just the initial rush of excitement from being around so many people happy to see you found your special someone and the overwhelming happiness on the most significant day of your life.
As he passes through the large church door and proceeded to the end of the isle, he takes notice of how well laid out it is. Simple, yet beautiful. Little yellow daisies were pinned to ribbons and strung along the backs of pews. A plain satin Isle runner lines the open space in between the rows of seating. At the altar the sits three vases filled with white and yellow flowers of some sort and more simple yellow daisies.
He could only smile looking at them, remembering the time when Tohru picked the colors.
"Mom always told me flower colors have meanings. More specifically, roses, but I still like the yellow daisies the best. Yellow stands for friendship, joy and new beginnings and white means purity and honesty. I want everyone there to have that feeling!"
When she had told him those words, he couldn't have thought she picked better colors to represent her own personality and the true meaning behind being married. Tohru is herself a pure and honest person, someone who gives other joy and new beginnings and treasures her friendships above almost anything else.
Seeing her walk down the isle with his adoptive father would be enough to melt almost any man, and it certainly did him. He could feel his heart beating a little faster as he looks at this vision of loveliness coming his way. Her gown was a lovely white and fit her body perfectly, without any tailoring needed. There is a touch of embroidery across her waistline, accented with small silver-ish beads that slowly increase in length from her right to her left. Highlighted by a simple, silver band of pearls strung around her neck, the only strap on the dress goes up and twists around her neck in a little loop. A long, thin lace veil covers her pretty make-up free skin. As far as he can tell, the only thing related to make-up she is wearing is the tiny slick of gloss adorning her lips. The train trails behind her, being carried at the end by a cute Kisa in a little beige flower girl dress.
The only oddity -though he can understand why she has done it- is a single red rose bud pinned to the left side of her veil to create a "tucked-behind-the-ear" look. A simple pair of white gloves and a bride's bouquet of yellow and white daisies complete her look. She is simply the most wonderful, breathtakingly gorgeous bride he's ever laid eyes on. And she is his, which makes this moment all the more wonderful.
The best man -also happening to be the one who walked his bride down the isle- lines up beside him, in between carrot top and his two best friends.
Tohru steps into place beside her maid of honor, Risa Uotani and her two bridesmaids, Saki Hanajima and Kagura Sohma, his cousin. Uotani and Kagura both were suited to the beige dresses, but looking at Saki wearing another color as apposed to black is wrong on so many different levels of interpretation.
He glances out quickly over the small crowd of family and friends in the stands. Shigure, Momiji, Hatsuharu and Rin in the first pew on the left-hand side, then behind them Hiro and his parents. In the first pew on the right-hand side, Ritsu and his mother and father sit, behind them Ayame, Yuki and Hatori. A few of the other Sohma had come as well, though not anyone he knew all that well. In the following pews were a few people that Tohru and Kyou knew in their high school years. All the men -yes, even Hiro, though probably through great force- came wearing their suits and ties and each woman was in a nice-looking dress of their own.
He turns his eyes back to Tohru, who is giving him her best smile yet. Her face is flushed a deep red, her eyes filled with nervous anticipation. He smiles at her, knowing she was the best thing to ever happen to him before the pastor begins his reading.
The reception goes off without a hit, food that Tohru herself had carefully prepared for everyone being served as music plays and people and children dance together. Old men sit at tables talking about their "old days," and telling corny jokes and stories they presume to be funny to anyone who will listen. Women are naturally gossiping about this and that and talking about children as he and his brand new bride pass from table to table visiting with everyone and thanking them for coming.
Even though the honeymoon was grand and he had plenty of adventures, many of the memories they made visiting The Bahamas were ones he only wishes to keep to himself.
Months later, after much more chaos and planning, their first child is born. A little boy with fiery goldenrod eyes and a laugh that would be enough to warm the heart of the most bitter of people. The baby was born very small, so tiny that he could be held in his proud father's two large hands.
Once Tohru is discharged from the hospital and given the doctor's consent, she went in search of a job to help support the needs of the baby. The boy grows well and happy, free of care and polite yet slightly air-headed like his mother. His hair begins to come in a rich chestnut brown, not unlike Tohru's. Kyou and Tohru watch their first child grow to be a preschooler, and start thinking of having another.
The three of them take a few small trips together, going on picnics in the park and to barbecues with the family before the second baby is born, this one a little girl. With tiny sprouts of orange hair already coming onto her head at two days old, she looks immediately like her father. And when her eyes begin to further develop, they are a beautiful blue. The Gods have blessed their children with their parent's resemblance. Kyou couldn't possibly be happier holding his children and having his wife at his side.
Thunder crashes noisily outside his window, startling the orange-haired teen back into a waking state. He looks around the dark and unfamiliar room wondering how on Earth he had ended up where he is. His body feels sticky with sweat from sleep and when he looks over, there is no Tohru to greet him. What's going on here? He was just with his family and sharing in some of his happiest times with everyone.
A rather sudden sinking feeling grasps his stomach as realization hits him. It had all been just his imagination. None of it had ever really happened. It had all simply been a dream born of his own imaginings. None of what he had just seen was real, not the love, not the wedding, not the family and especially not the happiness. None of those things really existed. His hand about tears a hole in his blanket as he lets the information sink in. None of it could ever happen, not one single, solitary moment of happiness could happen in his life. For, as the cat of the zodiac, come graduation, he is to be locked away in a dark cell deep within Sohma house. He could never be happy again once that happens. And he shouldn't be. He has not right to be.
His own mother killed herself because she couldn't stand having a monster for a son. His father became estranged and hated him. He even let her mother die. The person that means more than anything in the world to him and he just let her mother walk out into the road and be run down. He shouldn't be allowed to feel this way, in fact he doesn't even want to. It kills him to have such strong feelings for someone that he'll never have a chance with even if he had the right to love her from the start. But, in the end, he probably deserves this pain. If it's the only way to repent of his sins then he must do it.
Tears sting at the corners of his eyes for a moment before all he's kept bottled up inside breaks loose all at once and he begins to sob openly. He wraps his hands around his knees, the pain coursing through his bind and body too ridiculous for any one person to bear alone. Lightening illuminates the room as he wipes some of the tears away and immediately falls prey to another assault of tears. Soon the dream that he had concocted in his mind as he slept tonight and dreams like it will be his only comforts in life.
"Tohru..." He mumbles into his bed pants shakily as more tears roll down over his cheeks. "Tohru!" His heart aches for the girl and the love she has shown him. Since when has he loved her this much? The answer is unclear. What is clear is that she is the one thing he's going to miss. The most important thing he will miss.
As he wipes away the tears yet another time, there comes a gentle knock on his door. He tries quickly and desperately to hide the evidence that he had been crying and turns toward the door.
"C-Come in," He manages to keep his voice steady as the young brunette walks in, looking rather worried.
"Are you okay Kyou-kun?" She asks gingerly, not wanting to get into trouble with the temperamental boy.
"Yeah...I'm fine. Thanks for checking on me." He says in an aloof tone, trying not to give anything away. This night's already been way too emotional for his liking and he doesn't know how much more he can handle.
"Oh, I um...you're welcome. I was just passing by to go back to my room and heard you saying my name..." When the tiny girl tells him his his head turns in her direction, his eyes sadly pleading for mercy.
"No!" He yells. "I wasn't saying your name! Now just go away already!"
Her eyes widen a bit until her face falls, downcast. "I understand Kyou-kun. Sorry to have disturbed you. I'll go now..."
When she turns away solemnly and walks away, the cat can't decide what's more painful: Hurting her and watching her sulk like this or accepting her when when he doesn't deserve it. He tightly clenches a fist as the door to his room slides to a close. God, I'm such a useless guy...
On the other side of the door leans a hunched over Tohru, looking particularly glum. In her eyes however, flashes a fierce determination. Don't worry Kyou-kun. I will find a way to break this curse. I will, I promise. She stands straight, walking back to her room tiredly and once again, leaving Kyou to his own imagination.
And here it is finally, chapter four. It's pretty sad like I said, but hopefully still okay. Please leave some comments for me to allow my head to swell to epic proportions while reading. No flames, no rude people. Serious conviction, like I said. If you must criticize it then be polite. I'd like to grow more talented as a writer and I know that will help me.
Thanks to all who have reviewed my work so far. You few people who have read and like my story are the best. Also, I'd just like to say that the reviewer Storyunfinished is not me setting up a second account to give reviews to myself. Not that desperate and definitely not stupid enough to make a name that greatly resembles my own pen name to review my own stories. That person is in fact my fiancee, who sometimes gets online to read my work. He picked that name because he's not creative at all. And I was pretty mad he ripped off my pen name. But I still love him:)
As a final note, I'd like to encourage everyone to keep reading and I really hope that you all enjoy my coming chapters as much as the previous ones.