A bright and sunny day turned into a cold, starry night. The exorcists were in their chambers, ready for a good nights rest, except for those certain few that forgot to do their homework. Allen and Kanda stared blankly at their diaries, wondering what to write. They both knew that if they missed out or didn't write anything, Komui would eat them alive. Eventually Kanda thought of something and jotted it down. It may be short, but at least it's something.
Diary: Day 1
Just arrived back from a mission and already stuck in the mad scientist's room along with moyashi. Had to do a ridiculous test which lasted 3 hours! Spent the rest of the day relaxing in my room. I refuse to take anymore disturbances by these stupid scientists and their games. Hope they all go to hell. –Kanda
Happy with at least having something written on the page, Kanda finished up and retired to bed. Meanwhile, Allen was still having difficulty figuring out what to write. After thinking about it for over an hour, Allen was feeling his stomach growing ravenous. Taking his diary and a small lighted candle, he headed into the cafeteria. Grabbing a small snack (which happened to be 3 plates of rice, teriyaki chicken and miso soup) he finally took out his pen and began to write.
Dear Diary,
Today I just arrived back along with Kanda from a mission that lasted a week. We didn't retrieve any innocence, but we managed to destroy quite a number of Akuma and save a town that was on the verge of abandonment. Once I got back, I had no chance to eat because Komui-san called us to his office. A new member of the science section will be arriving. They happen to be a therapist so we had to take a test (game) which will decide which one of us needs to go into therapy. It was boring, but at least I got to eat as much as I wanted afterwards. Kanda was being a baka as usual…but I tried to not let it bother me. Besides eating, I spent the rest of the day sleeping, recovering from the mission. I will have to wait and see what tomorrow brings.
Allen Walker
Finishing off his diary, Allen headed back to his room, blew out the candle and went to bed. It had been a busy day, and only time could tell what tomorrow would to bring.
Looking at the time, it was only 3:00am on the clock, but already the loud noise of a megaphone could be heard throughout the hallways of the Black Order.
"RISE AND SHINE! ALLEN, KANDA, LAVI, LENALEE, KRORY AND MIRANDA! YOU'RE NEEDED IN MY OFFICE~ PRONTO!" Komui yelled through the blowhorn.
Allen, thanks to his time spent with Cross, was already on his way, but a little depressed that again, he missed out on breakfast, despite his 'snack' he had last night. Miranda, being used to staying awake long hours, was having no trouble either, however, the other exorcists (especially Lavi) were having some difficult getting out of bed so early.
"DON'T MAKE ME SEND KOMURIN AFTER YOU~!"
Despite Komui's attempts to scare them, they still straggled behind heading towards Komui's office. Slowly but surely, they all arrived one by one even though quite a few of them were still in their pyjamas.
"What the fuck is your problem?" Kanda snarled.
Suddenly, Komui was holding a bucket with a strange liquid inside, with a creepy, devilish smile on his face.
"Don't you dare…"
"Too late!" Komui smiled. In that instant, they were all drenched in some sort of sticky, tea aroma.
"Grrr, you fucking asshole!... Mugen!"
"What did I tell you about bringing mugen into my office?"
"You told me not to!...wait…what?" Kanda looked confused as he held is sword towards Komui.
"Sorry Kanda~ but the liquid I just dumped on all of you, not only did it wake you all up, but it is also a specially developed potion created by me! You could say it's a truth potion."
"Tch!"
"That's absurd! What happened to freedom of speech?" Lavi defended.
"Onii-san!" Lenalee complained.
"I'm sorry everyone, but I had no other choice, it's the only way to get you all to cooperate and be honest at the same time."
"You couldn't think of any other way Komui-san?" Allen sincerely added.
"Okay okay, enough complaining everyone! It's time for your second test!"
(Everyone) "WHAAAT!"
"Whoa, wait, alright. I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I can't just do an analysis based on one test. There are actually 3 tests which will then allow me to complete your analysis. By then our new science member should arrive and will look at your results to determine which of you will need therapy. Don't worry, all the exorcists are going through this."
"So why are we in a group?" Kanda questioned.
"Well, to save time, I decided to put the exorcists into groups of 6 with the people they most associate with…"
"Fair enough, but that doesn't give you any reason to lie to us, Onii-san"
"Sorry Lenalee-chan!"
"It doesn't give you any reason to drench us in truth potion either…" Lavi moaned.
"If you all have finished complaining, we will move on, okay?"
(Everyone) "Fine."
"Today I will be asking you a series of questions (this is how the truth potion comes in handy). There are a total of 10 questions and I want you to answer in this order; Allen, Lenalee, Lavi, Kanda, Krory then Miranda."
1. What would you do if you saw a young child, standing alone, crying in a public area?
Allen: Offer him/her company and ask if s/he was okay.
Lenalee: I would ask why s/he was crying, then stay with them until they shed a smile.
Lavi: I would try to make the kid laugh! If s/he was separated from their parents, I would help him/her look for them!
Kanda: Tch. I would walk away! Who cares about a crying kid.
Krory: I would offer s/he some candy so they would stop crying.
Miranda: Poor child! After clearing away their tears, I would stay with her/him as long as they needed! (If they didn't run away…)
2. Would you be willing to have horrible nightmares every night for a year if you would be rewarded with extraordinary wealth?
Allen: Wealth? Hmm…if it would solve my debt problems then YES!
Lenalee: Never
Lavi: Hell yes!
Kanda: Like I care
Krory: Uh…maybe?
Miranda: Yes…wait…no…ohh…yes! No!
3. Would you be willing to eat a bowl of live crickets for 100,000 yen?
Allen: Yes! That would solve at least 1/20 of my debts!
Lenalee: Eww, no way!
Lavi: I suppose…but I'd rather pay that much to see the Old Panda eat them!
Kanda: Che. Hell no.
Krory: If they taste okay, I don't see why not?
Miranda: I was forced to eat a cricket once…doesn't matter if I do it again.
4. What are the most important lessons you've learned in life?
Allen: No matter what happens I'll keep on moving. Until this life runs out of me I'll keep on walking, because that is my promise to Mana.
Lenalee: To me the death of one companion... is like a piece of "the world" getting destroyed.
Lavi: War is sorrowful. The flames of war burn away life and dreams and bonds, leaving behind countless sorrows. So sorrow gives birth to tragedy. And tragedy gives birth to Akuma. Old Panda taught me that!
Kanda: Even while you are in doubt, there will be an answer you will arrive to. Even while you are in pain, your happiness will be waiting. *Everyone looked stunned at Kanda* Piss off.
Krory: When you lose someone you love, you just have to pray that their soul is in a better place. By keeping that in mind, you can remain at peace.
Miranda: Well…I believe you can't let others get to you and bring you down. By becoming the better person, you become stronger, at least, I hope.
5. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 5 years to become stronger? 10 years? 15 years?
Allen: What is the point in living if you wish your life away only to become stronger? My answer is no to all, because becoming stronger, should be something you work for, not pay for!
Lenalee: I agree with Allen-kun. I would not be willing to reduce my life for strength, no matter how many or how little years.
Lavi: The logic in it is unreasonable. If you were to live for only another 10 years and you gave up 5 just to become strong, then you basically lose half your life. I would definitely not take the deal.
Kanda: Hell no. I don't need to become stronger.
Krory: Um…well…I would take 5 years off, but no more! By becoming stronger, you can protect your friends, and that's more important than your own life, right?
Miranda: No, no, no! I would hate to become stronger if it meant giving up the little life we humans have!
6. What is it you like best about your friends personality? What do you like the least? Please choose one friend to talk about.
Allen: Kanda is always cruel and pushes everyone away. He is strong and he helps out even if that wasn't his intention, but I wish he would stop calling me Moyashi! He has such a tiny brain that its obviously too hard for him to use any manners.
"Whoa! Why so harsh Moyashi?" Lavi added.
"Don't interrupt Lavi"
"Oh…gomen Komui-san"
Lenalee: Allen is always polite and kind-hearted. Putting everyone else's feelings before his own. It would be nice to be trusted by him once in a while…
"What! I do trust you Lenalee-chan!" Allen pleaded. Lenalee just turned the other way without saying a word.
"Would you all please STOP interrupting! Okay?" Komui added. "Now continue…"
Lavi: I've known Kanda for a long time, and I thought I figured him out, his coldness towards everyone, but talent for killing Akuma. However, I still can't work him out. I don't think he'll ever warm up to us and honestly wouldn't care if we all died! It would be nice if he cared.
"What the fuck is this. Was the question 'What do you like and dislike about Kanda?' or just my imagination?" Kanda butt in.
"What did I say about interrupting~!" By this time, Komui was starting to get really annoyed.
Kanda: Che. Lavi is always smiling, other people seem to think it's good, but it just fucking gets on my nerves.
Krory: K-Kanda is very strong and takes charge but is always scary and to be honest, I don't think he likes me very much!
Miranda: I agree with Krory.
Komui sighed. "Alright, let's just move on…"
7. Would you enjoy spending a month of solitude in a beautiful natural setting? Food and shelter would be provided but you would not see another person.
Allen: No, It would get too lonely…but the idea of having unlimited food sounds tempting!
Lenalee: It would be nice, but a month alone is too long. I believe you should always stick with family and friends.
Lavi: Oh man! A month without any disruptions and a beautiful natural setting! What a fantastic holiday! I'd definitely go!
Kanda: Any place without Moyashi is a holiday.
Krory: It sounds nice, but it would remind me too much of… *tearing up* Eliade…
Miranda: I've never taken a holiday. Having your own place with food and shelter and no disturbances, it sounds pleasant! I would like to go.
8. Would you rather go a week without bathing, but be able to change your clothes, or a week without a change of clothes, but be able to bathe?
Allen: Uhh…I think I'd rather be able to bathe…
Lenalee: Definitely be able to bathe!
Lavi: Bathe
Kanda: Bathe
Krory: Bathe
Miranda: Bathe
9. If you could wake up tomorrow in the body of someone else currently living, would you do so? Whom would you pick?
Allen: BaKanda. So that I could cut his hair to see what it looks like short…teehee *devilish smile*
Lenalee: Bookman. He is always so well respected and smart!
Lavi: Cross Marian. It would be interesting to know how many women he has by his side! *Hearty eyes*
Kanda: No.
Krory: Allen-kun. He's always so brave. I'd love to have half the courage he has…
Miranda: Lenalee-chan. She is always so kind and sweet. I wish I was more like her…
10. If you could have anyone locked in a room so that you could torment them for a day, whom would you choose, and how would you torment them?
Allen: *Allen turned into his inner demon*
CROSS MARIAN! I would tie him down, force-feed him dirt, cut off his ears, sell his kidneys and hit him so hard with Lavi's hammer it would make him bleed from places he didn't know he had! Then, I would pour his precious wine down a hole while I use a 1-ton hammer to break his toes-
"Ah, Allen…that's…enough…" Komui said with a concerned expression on his face. "Please, continue Lenalee-chan"
Lenalee: Millennium Earl. I would force him to kill his own Noah so that he knows the pain of losing someone he cares about!
Lavi: Yuu-tan! I would cut his hair and make him eat it! *Everyone surprised* Shit! Sorry Yuu-tan!
Kanda: Moyashi! I would cut him up piece by &^%$ piece, finger by &$% finger using Mugen. After cleaning the mess I would then shave his ridiculous &*#% old-man hair whilst having a $%&*$# buffet right in front of him where he could not reach! He would have no chance of survival.
"Th-thanks for sharing Kanda…Krory, please continue…"
Krory: Myself. *Starts to get teary* I would lock myself in a completely dark, sound-proof room and then tie barbed wire all around, so every time I moved I would be hurt…just like how I hurt my dear Eliade…
Miranda: THE BOYS! The little boys that made up that awful, painful, tearful poem about me. I would rip their teeth out, pull off each of their nails, force-feed them their own fingers, and force them to rip out their own eyes!
Everyone looked astonished by Miranda's answer. Nobody knew she had such anger (or courage) inside her. Even Komui was speechless at that moment.
"Oh my!…GOMEN NASAI! Oh my god, I'm such a horrible person! Please forgive me! No…don't forgive me! I'm too horrible…I'm sinful…*almost in tears* I am such a terrible person. I'm atrocious. I'm disgusting! Strike me down and kill me now." Miranda was almost ripping her own hair out. Non-stop apologising.
It took everyone a whole hour to get Miranda to calm down, but they managed somehow. Komui had no choice but to finish up and let everyone leave (after all, it was already midday). Komui suspended the six from going on any missions until they had finished their intervention, but that certainly didn't slip by the exorcists. With a lot of complaining and arguing, they finally agreed on an arrangement. After dinner the exorcists would return for their final test then they were free from anymore evaluations (besides their daily diary entries) at least until the new science member arrived...
To be continued...
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