This was a written for a writing challenge.

Prompt by lemony_snickers:
"What makes you happy?"
"Lots of things."
"What makes you unhappy?"
"Lots of other things. And some of the same ones."

The Yamanaka flower shop had been closed for hours and yet Temari found herself – once again - stood in front of the dark windows of the empty store. The streets of the Hidden Leaf Village were all but deserted at this hour and Temari allowed herself to stare at the cut blooms behind the glass as she tried to get her head straight, tried to figure out what she was going to say. Before she could fully prepare herself, however, one of the lights from upstairs turned on. The door next to the shop entrance – the door to the apartment above the shop – creaked open, casting a shaft of artificial light onto the cold concrete of the street outside.

Ino huffed.

"Not again?"

Her words were borne of frustration but she looked at the visitor with a pitiful gaze which Temari tried her hardest to ignore for fear of this tiny gesture of affection making her unnecessarily emotional.

"Come in," Ino said. "You must be freezing."

The first time, Temari had apologised for disturbing her. She hadn't been in Konoha very long and hadn't known where else to go; who else to speak to. Shikamaru had been her most trusted confidante for so long that she had never felt the need to form any others. It was an arrangement which had seemed healthy, right up until Shikamaru himself had become the problem.

"Tea?" Ino offered. "Or wine?"

"Tea." Temari settled herself into one of Ino's chairs. The last time she had had wine here, she had drunk to the point of feeling her throat tighten and her eyes prickle as they had talked. She wouldn't let herself lose control like that again.

The apartment was cosy and clean, full of family photos and delicate botanicals. Anyone could be forgiven for thinking this was the home of any normal young woman, rather than that of one of the most skilled kunoichi in the Great Nations. After a few moments, the whistling of a kettle sounded from Ino's small kitchen, and she soon emerged with a pot and cups, placing them on the low table between them.

"So," she said, pouring tea for them both, "is he out right now?"

Ino always had a selection of teas neatly arranged in her kitchen and knew by now that Temari's favourite was the cherry blossom sencha. Despite the sweet steam from the brew, however, Temari had a bitter taste in the back of her throat.

"He is. I can't be alone in that empty house, just waiting for him to come home."

She had waited up for him once. He hadn't come back until the early hours and was clearly displeased to see her still awake, avoiding her eyes and her questions. Ever since then, she had pretended to be asleep when he arrived home, listening to him spend far too long in the shower and put his clothes through the laundry before sleeping on the couch rather than join her in their bed.

"Do you know where he goes?" Ino asked her friend.

It wasn't the first time she had asked this. Truth be told, Temari still didn't feel as though she knew Ino well enough to be speaking about her relationship to her so openly. Especially seeing as she was Shikamaru's friend first, and her own second. She didn't want to sour anyone against him. She loved him.

"I know exactly what's going on," said Temari. "And worse, I think he knows that I know exactly what's going on."

"And he keeps doing it anyway? Despite what it's doing to you?"

Temari took a sip of her tea. It was still too hot and her tongue burned. "He says it's just an anger thing and that I shouldn't worry about it. He doesn't think it's any of my business."

Ino swore. Temari's partner had been one of her best friends her whole life but that didn't mean she cut him any slack when he was being – in Ino's own words – a total cunt.

"Maybe I should never have moved to Konoha." The same old problem rolled around in Temari's head. "Maybe this was a mistake."

She had wanted to leave Suna to move in with Shikamaru and try to build a life together with him; it had been her idea. She liked the Hidden Leaf Village and it was obvious that Shikamaru wouldn't have survived two minutes in the Land of Wind. But now that she was here, there had been obvious teething problems which neither of them had seemed to know how to deal with. And when she didn't feel like Shikamaru was on her side, being in Konoha was inescapably lonely. How was she supposed to live her life alongside a man who tried to keep secrets from her like this?

"Don't say that," Ino said. "You're trying, aren't you? That's really brave. It was never going to be easy; we've all been having a hard time since the war. Of course he's struggling to cope, it's Shikamaru – he's a genius with everything except emotions. So what if some of his coping strategies are…" she searched for a kind word, "unhelpful. You can get past it."

"That's what I thought at first – that it was just a phase which would fizzle out as quickly as it started. But the more it happens, the more it feels like he's slipping away from me." Temari drank her tea, not caring how it burned her throat. "I don't understand why he won't just talk to me about it."

In his defence, he had never exactly lied to her. He never told her that he was with Ino or Chouji, or that he was working late. He only ever said he was going out and didn't know when he'd be back. All she could do was be thankful that he did come back, however close she was to telling him not to bother and have the locks changed.

Ino sighed. "I love Shikamaru to death, you know I do," she said. "But you need to do what's right for you, Temari. What makes you happy?"

It wasn't as simple as that. There was so much that she loved about Suna, and so much that she loved about Konoha. "Lots of things."

Temari could see a little muscle flex at Ino's temple as she gritted her teeth in frustration. "Okay… well, what makes you unhappy."

"Lots of other things." She knew that this wasn't the answer Ino was looking for. "And... some of the same ones."

Temari didn't know what she wanted, and her indecision seemed to be as frustrating to Ino as it was to herself. But when Ino laughed, she looked up to see her expression had changed from exasperation to affection.

"You're so articulate about everything else in your life, Tem, but a total idiot with emotions. You're just like him, you know? Perfect for each other."

Temari had thought it was true once. She had thought that they complemented each other, fulfilling each other's needs and healing each other's flaws, that together they were strong. Now, she wasn't so sure. Now, she worried that he was too much like her. That he was weak in ways she didn't know how to help.

"Do you wanna stay here tonight?"

The dregs of tea in the bottom of the pot were cold.

"No," Temari refused the offer, "I should get back. I want to get home before he does."

Temari walked back through the bright lights of the Village and out towards the peaceful darkness of the Nara district. The path up to their home flanked the trees of the forest and she stared at her feet as she walked so that she didn't have to look into the ageless blackness of the woodland; so that she didn't have to think about her partner being in there.

But her attempt to ignore the issue didn't last; she could hear what was going on. It was far enough away that the untrained ear may mistake the noise for the whistling of wind through the canopies or the distant howling of wild dogs. But Temari knew the truth: someone was screaming. They weren't Shikamaru's screams; she would have known how to deal with those. What she didn't know how to deal with were the screams that went on for hours and hours every time Shikamaru took himself away into the forest. He could never speak to her afterwards, wouldn't look her in the eye, just came home with dirt under his fingernails and blood on his shirt.

Temari began humming to herself so she couldn't hear it. Ino was right – she needed to talk to him. But for now, it was all she could do to quiet the shivers up her spine and calm the panic in her chest that told her to run.

She knew exactly where Shikamaru went when he left her at night.

He'd dug him up again.