Disclaimer: I do not own Prince of Tennis.

Lady Monozuki: I know I've been so horrible with updates lately. I have a couple of reasons. The first was that I was sick and really tired. The next is that I lost my job. I'm really upset about that. My job was really important to me and was going to pay for my going back to school as well as some vacations this summer. Sadly, it looks like none of it is going to happen because I don't have the money. It took me a year and a half to find that job and it was gone. I'm worried that it's going to take me another year and a half to find another. So I'm just in a meh mood.

So if you have PMed me or have reviewed and I haven't replied, you now know why. Also, it's why my updates have been nonexistent until now. I apologize and hope that this chapter makes up for it. Thanks for being patient with me and thank you for reviewing as well. You are the best! Please continue to review, it will seriously make my week as well as give me more motivation to write!

Also, as I continue to write this, I can see the five of them getting back together. My original intent was just to have Fuji and Ryoma get back together. However, I can see them together and I wanted to leave it up to the readers as to whether the final pairing should be OT5 or Fuji/Ryoma (and whatever I decide for the others). Please vote for your preference.

Chapter Fifteen: Jealousy

Fuji stared at the paperwork he was supposed to be reading through. None of it was registering in his brain. He had read the same line over fifty times and still had no idea what it was about. His mind was preoccupied with the news that he got last night. Ryoma could go home with him. After work, he was going to pick up Ryoma. However, he had to get through his workday first. He could feel Tezuka's gaze on him from the distance and it unnerved him. They had received the call last night and he could never forget the look on the usually passive face, jealousy.

While the expression had been there for a brief moment, it still scared him. He knew what Kunimitsu was going through, but he couldn't do anything to help the other. He had made a decision and he was going to stick by it. He had let the past eight years of his life be controlled by others and he wasn't going to let that happen. Fuji put down the papers and looked out from his office. His eyes caught Tezuka's for a brief moment. He knew that he had made a mistake taking the other in.

So why did he offer his place? Even he did not understand the reason nor could he come up with one. He was doing himself and Kunimitsu a disservice. However, he could not go back on his word now. It would have been easier to turn the other away at the beginning. Yet, he allowed the other to stay and let hiss guard down.

Why were you so careless? You always do things for a reason beneficial to you. However, you have none. So why are you putting yourself in a position to get hurt again?

"Is something wrong, Syuusuke?" he heard. He jumped slightly and turned to see Tezuka in his office. He stared for a moment before regaining his composure.

"Nothing, I was just thinking."

"I know you're distracted, but you need to focus. Yudan sezu nii ikkou."

He wanted to let out a bitter chuckle. How many times had he heard that phrase and yet he still ended up in this situation?

"I know," he said. "I'll get back to work."

He turned his attention back to the papers, trying to push everything out of his thoughts. It was difficult to do, especially with Tezuka still there and watching his every move. It made him uncomfortable to say the least.

"Is there anything else that you need, Tezuka?"

"Just curious, could I go with you to pick up Echizen?"

"It doesn't make a difference to me," he replied. It was true. Ryoma was going to find out one way or another that Tezuka was living with him. How the other would take the news, he didn't know. He had barely explained all that had happened on the night Ryoma tried to commit suicide and was content with not delving into the topic. After all, he felt that the other didn't need to concern himself with that matter until they worked through Echizen's depression first.

It was obvious that they both needed to heal before even trying to work out the remaining issues between them and the rest of their lovers. He noticed that Tezuka was staring at him again. He tried to ignore all the alarm bells going off in his mind, but they were steadily increasing in volume.

"I'll let you get back to work then," Tezuka sad.

"Meet me outside the office at three."

"Don't worry, I will."

---

He remained silent as they walked to the hospital. It reminded him so much of the old days where Fuji would walk beside him, carrying a casual conversation about anything, everything, and nothing. He missed those days, where they did not have to worry about anything but their education and sports. It was a time where they could experiment and just enjoy not having responsibilities.

"You can't live in your childhood forever. You won't be able to handle the situations that you will face. Until you can grow up, we don't want anything to do with you. Wake up soon, Kunimitsu."

He remembered that conversation with his parents very well. That was when he had told them about his relationship with the others. They had disowned him and refused to speak to him until he was ready for a "proper relationship". He had never told his former lovers about that conversation because he had put his faith in them. Yet, here he was. He had nothing. He had wanted to prove his parents wrong. So far, they had been right. Was he really a fool?

"Tezuka," Syuusuke said. He looked over at the person beside him. "I hope you aren't misunderstanding my reason for taking you in. I only said that you could stay because I know what it's like to have nothing. I'm not doing this for any other reason outside of that."

It hurt so much to hear those words from someone who had once been his lover. He had tried to convince himself that there were still feelings for each other there, but there wasn't. Of course he knew that when Syuusuke left, it was to take care of Ryoma. His heart still refused to accept that after being together for over eight years, there was nothing left between them.

All of the times that they had been together and the times where they just sought consolation as friends came to his mind. How could Syuusuke set aside everything that they had been through for something that might not work out in the end? Couldn't Fuji see that he was willing to take him back and start anew? Why was Fuji leaving him to suffer this alone?

"Tezuka, are you all right?"

"Yes," he replied. He could tell the other wasn't convinced by his hasty reply. He did not care though. It was better to give short and quick answers so that his true emotions would not come out. "I understand and appreciate everything you're doing for me. I should not be a burden to you any longer."

He wanted to vomit. Those words were like poison. The more he tried to convince himself that they were true, the sicker he felt. He was trying to lie to himself and it was not working. They always said that the heart ruled over the mind and he supposed he had just proven them true. So what was he supposed to do with his feelings? He could not change the way that he felt and he couldn't express them either. What was he supposed to do?

"You know that you can't lie to me, Kunimitsu."

"I know, but I can still try."

"That's what got us into this mess in the first place. We were lying to each other and ourselves. Because of that, we did not address or solve anything that needed to. We both know that we were not happy that way. Tell me what's wrong," Syuusuke said gently.

"No," he said in a harsher tone than he meant. "I don't want to complicate things for you. You are going to have enough to handle with Ryoma."

"Kunimitsu…"

"Don't try to change my mind. Besides, I thought you were insisting on calling me Tezuka."

---

Fuji bit his tongue. He wasn't going to try and argue with Tezuka. Obviously, there was something bothering his former lover. While he knew that he did not have a right to ask Tezuka about his feelings, he wanted to know what was wrong. Although, he felt like he already knew the reason. It was something that he was trying to avoid, but his decision to take Kunimitsu in did not help.

It was cruel of him, but he had made Ryoma his priority and nothing was going to get in the way of that. The fact that Tezuka had come to him and sought shelter in his apartment meant nothing. He had suffered days of elf-abuse to get to the point where he could finally take Ryoma home.

"Syuusuke, I'm sorry."

He knew that Tezuka was sorry for snapping at him. It was fine, it didn't matter. However, it still hurt a little.

"It's all right," he whispered. "You're still trying to get used to the idea of being on your own. You are stressed and I can handle that. Just please don't do anything to upset Ryoma. He doesn't need anything else on his mind while he's recovering."

"Don't you think that he'll see through our act quickly though? He's always been the one who could read us at all times."

"We have to try," he replied. "If not for him, do it as a favor for me."

They lapsed into silence again. He knew that he was asking too much of Tezuka and relying too much on him. They walked through the doors of the hospital and he headed straight for Ryoma's room. His heart started to pound loudly. He was excited to finally be able to take home Ryoma. He knew that the journey would not be easy, but they would be able to make it through together. Fuji knocked gently on the door before entering. He saw Ryoma standing near the window.

"My, you certainly have been busy," he commented. "Yesterday you couldn't stand much."

"You know that I'm not one to stay still."

"No, are you going to be able to walk home or should I call a taxi?"

"How far away is your place?

"Our place," he corrected. "It's three and a half blocks from here."

"I can make it."

"Don't push yourself."

"You didn't care about me before," Ryoma bit out.

He sighed. It was true, but it hurt all the same. He wanted to show that he did care. It seemed that this was not going to be as easy as he thought. Ryoma turned around and his eyes widened. That's when he remembered that Tezuka was with him.

"What are you doing here?" Ryoma asked.

"I'm here because I want to be here."

"In other words, Atobe dumped you too and you went to Syuusuke," Ryoma said bitterly.

Syuusuke flinched at the harsh tone Ryoma used. He wondered what was wrong with Ryoma today and he intended to confront the latter about it as soon as they were home.

"He is temporarily staying at our apartment until he can find his own place. This will not affect my taking care of you. Now, I'll go fill out your discharge papers and then we'll leave."

He left the room, hoping that they would be fine without him.

---

Ryoma stared at Tezuka for a moment before turning away. When Syuusuke had told him that he wanted to take care of him and that they would make it on their own, it was hard to accept, but he was going to try and accept it. However, doubt had started to creep in his mind and it was starting to affect his mood. Now that Tezuka was here, he already did not like what he saw. He could already tell that there was jealousy brewing and he did not want to be involved with that. He wanted someone to focus on him and take care of him. It didn't matter what he thought of himself, as long as there was someone who still believed in him.

"You're still hoping that he will choose you," he said. "Isn't that right?"

"What are you talking about? Tezuka replied.

"Don't pretend that you don't know what I'm talking about. You know that I can see through the façade you put up."

"Syuusuke said that it doesn't matter, he's going to focus on you. He's not happy at my staying there either."

"That's what you believe," he replied. He didn't want to discuss this any further. He could already see something bad happening in the future and it made him want to go home even less. He had enough of being used and didn't want it to happen again. The past few years of his life had been wasted and he was determined to start again.

"Ryoma, I have no intention of getting in between you and Syuusuke."

"Is that the lie you're trying to feed yourself?" he asked. He turned and looked his former captain, former lover, in the eye. He was angry and he wasn't going to try and suppress his emotions. He had done that and it hadn't worked. "You're not over him and you never will be. You can say that you want him to be happy, but you want him to be happy with you. It must be torture knowing that he does not intend to get back together with you and yet he is letting you stay in his place. You can tell yourself all you want that you're fine with being ignored, but you're not. Don't you dare lie to me, Tezuka. I can see through it all."

"Why are you so angry at me?"

He laughed. "I'm not just angry at you. I'm angry at everyone and myself. You don't realize what it's like to be me. If you think that you're the one who lost everything, you're wrong. I'm the one who lost everything in this relationship and I'm still on the losing end."

He noticed that Tezuka was starting to close the gap between them. He panicked, memories coming back to his mind of the encounter that he had desperately been trying to forget since it happened.

"Stay there!" he shouted. "Don't try to comfort me. None of you know what it's like to be me and what I'm going through. No one can help me."

"You know that's not true," Tezuka said in a soft tone.

He blinked back tears. "You have no idea what you're talking about. I am beyond help."

"Then you believe that Syuusuke made a mistake in saving your life?"

"No," he replied. "I've just given up on myself."

---

Tezuka was stunned at those words. He had never seen or heard Ryoma look so defeated since they visited him in the hospital in America. It was heartbreaking and yet, he could do nothing to help Ryoma. The only person who had managed to get close to Ryoma was Syuusuke. However, it seemed that Echizen was still harboring a grudge against all of them. He wondered if Fuji knew this because it would certainly complicate things in the future.

His cell rang; he pulled it out and looked at the number. He was stunned for a moment.

"It's Atobe, you should take that call."

He stared at Ryoma for a moment. How had he known?

"I can tell by the look on your face. Go ahead, I'll be fine on my own. After all, I am alone."

He wanted to tell Ryoma that he wasn't, but figured that it wouldn't do any good. He stepped out of the room and went down the hall before answered.

"Atobe," he said. "Why are you calling?"

"Kunimitsu, I know that I've done a lot of things to make you angry and everyone else angry at me. However, I need your help."

He frowned. "What do you need?"

"I need you to help me to get Ryoma and Syuusuke to my mansion and talk about what happened."

"You mean, you want to make amends?"

"Yes, with everyone. This will be after Ryoma wakes up of course."

"He's already awake," he replied.

"Oh, well then will you help me?"

"I'll arrange a date with them and let you know."

"Good, I'll contact Gen when you tell me."

Tezuka raised an eyebrow. Gen didn't know of Atobe's plan then.

"I'll do that for you, Keigo."

"You don't have to."

"I want to," he insisted.

"Fine, let me know what day you decide on."

"Of course," he said. "Atobe, I think that it would be best if you got to talk to Ryoma alone and tell him all your feelings while I talk to Syuusuke. We both have things that we need to work out with them without the presence of the other. What do you think?"

"You think that Syuusuke would separate from the brat for that long?"

"I think we could arrange it."

"Do you think Ryoma will even listen to me?" Atobe asked.

"You won't know unless you try. Besides, he needs to know that you still care for him. He thinks that he's all alone in this," he replied.

"All right, we'll set up some time alone. What about Gen?"

"Don't worry, I'll take care of Gen as well."

"I'll leave it to you then," Atobe said.

"I'll call you later."

He closed his phone and smirked. He had an idea forming in his mind.

You're right Ryoma, I'm not over Syuusuke. Just like Atobe isn't over you.

He had every intention to use that to his advantage.

To be continued…