Chapter 6

Our night time visit to Sunset Boulevard was spectacular. Angel took the children while Gunn and Fred took David, Cordy, Wesley Lorne and me. The sights and sounds and sheer volume of traffic and people were breathtaking. There was so much happening I didn't know where to look. We ate out in a Mexican restaurant and David paid, despite complaints from Angel and Gunn. Everyone was laughing and chatting and having a really good meal.

When we got back to the hotel Cordy had set up a computer game for everyone to play. It was something to do with training for the Apocalypse whilst fighting various monsters. Most people had heard of it, even David so I left them to it. I noticed that Angel had gone upstairs to his room and I followed him, knocking gently at his door.

"Come in Clare."

"Hey, you not interested in playing this Apocalypse game?"

"I have a feeling that eventually I may be playing the game for real." The rest of that sentence hung in the air and I didn't pursue it only to say, "Oh."

"So," he changed the subject, "How do you think the visit is going?"

"Wonderful." I beamed and went over to sit next to him on the sofa.

"You have got an amazing family."

"We have got an amazing family, remember."

"Beth and Kate have been telling me about themselves and about their life with the family."

"Is that what all the laughing was about a couple of nights ago?"

"Yes, the laughing was mainly to do with the antics that you have got up to over the years."

"I thought as much." I smiled. "I have done some stupid things in my time."

"Like getting stuck in the see through lift in the shopping centre, or sinking in the mud and ripping your trousers when you were on holiday or catapulting the priest with your bra or…"

"Ok so you know the story." I squeaked.

"You certainly seem to lead an interesting life and you also seem to laugh a lot."

"I have a very happy life."

"You have a very fulfilled life with your husband and children." He paused, "I so wish I could experience the joy of fatherhood."

I actually made him jump when I leapt off the sofa and shouted, "Done! You can have them! David and I can go and you can take over. I leave you a list of likes and dislikes, well actually it will have to be an encyclopedia and Liam needs socks at night as his feet get cold and Beth has her inhaler in a cupboard because she usually loses it along with her passport…"

"Sit down." He pulled my hand and I sat next to him. "You know what I mean. You and David seem to be brilliant parents and you have four really exceptional children. You make it look so easy."

I looked at him, "It's not easy being a parent, you have to make some very difficult decisions and for so many years, your life isn't really your own and spending time with your husband on your own without a selection of children in your bed is a feat of ingenuity!" I became serious. "If there was any possible way I could wish or pray for you to be a father, I would, because I think you would make the best dad ever." He put his arms around me and we just sat together listening to the noises from the family downstairs getting very excited over the game. I must have fallen asleep next to him as I woke up with my head on his lap covered with a blanket.

"Was there snoring and dribbling?" I asked.

"No snoring and only minimal dribbling."

"Oops! What time is it?"

"3.00 am"

I heard the noises from downstairs.

"They are still playing?"

"Yes. Would you like a drive?"

"Please."

"Come on then, let's go out in style, they won't notice." And with that he went to the window and climbed out, I followed him and immediately regretted it because it was one of those metal staircases you see in films that fold down. I held onto Angel as though my life depended on it – which it may well have done. We got into the Plymouth and he drove for miles out into the night with the top down. There were no houses or people just the road infront of us and the stars above us. He drove until he felt the dawn coming and then he put the roof on and I drove back. It was a magical time to have with him. When we got back to the hotel everyone had finally gone to bed leaving behind the remnants of what seemed to be a very good night. I crawled into bed and slept until late morning.

We tidied up and as various members of the family wandered downstairs they were fed and sat about chatting, it was a lovely lazy day until Angel got the call and Team Angel all had to go on a case and Lorne and David had already gone out to visit an observatory somewhere. It left just the children and me. Angel didn't really want everyone to go, but whatever the case was, it seemed to need all the manpower he could muster. I suddenly realized that he had made sure that someone from Team Angel was always in the house with us. It made me feel uneasy but I hoped that I had not shown it. Did Angel have special senses or was that Batman? I then started puzzling that and they were gone.

I wandered out into the garden to read my book. Sometime passed and I heard a voice.

"Hello." I looked up and saw a young man looking at me. He was quite close. I hadn't noticed him as I was too busy reading.

"Hello." I said and something made me quite wary. The hairs on the back of my neck just started to rise up.

The young man smiled with his mouth but not with his eyes, "Mrs Kerrigan, my name is Lindsey McDonald from Wolfram and Hart and I would like you to come with me."