Hey guys! I just want to give a shout-out to Peeta and Katniss 4 EVER your review had me cracking up! I loved it! Anyway, turns out I don't have BDD but my mom is putting me in therapy for my poor self image, and about my non-existent self-esteem. I start tomorrow. Ugh. Fuck that! Here's chapter 39.

Bella (Cullen-Swan)

I guess it was mean of me to leave Edward in that predicament, but honestly I wasn't ready to do that. Plus what if I wasn't good at doing that? What if he told his friends at how bad I was? I wouldn't be able to handle the embarrassment. So instead, saving myself from embarrassment, I decided to just leave him to it, and go downstairs. I was such a mean person. I was so going to hell for this.

"Hey guys" I smiled at them. They smiled back and Edward Sr. smirked. I scowled at him.

"So Bella, where's Edward?" He asked. Lizzy was silently laughing and I stared at her silently begging her to stop.

"He's upstairs" I replied with a hardened tone. He snorted and his lips were in a fine line so that they wouldn't open from laughing.

"Bells, what's going on?" Jack asked with lowered eyebrows in confusion. I bit my lip not sure what exactly to say.

"Nothing." I answered and glanced at Jack then looked to Edward Sr. and smirked, "Hey how about you guys go to the guest bedroom to laugh it off and Edward how about on the way there you grope Lizzy's ass?" I asked. They became silent and stopped laughing.

"You play mean Bella Swan" Edward pouted. I just smiled and faced my new friends.

"See you later" I winked to Edward and Lizzy before I sat on the couch.

"So where is Edward really?" Devon asked. I turned on the TV and looked to him.

"He's upstairs in his room, he'll be down in a minute" I said and flipped through the channels. Jennifer sat next to me and her arm was touching mine. It was a little uncomfortable, since I didn't know her very well, but she gave me a bright warm smile so I guess it was ok.

"So Bella, Jane told me that you and Edward had a riff" Devon asked. Jack elbowed him and rolled his eyes.

"God you're such an idiot. Don't worry about him Bella, he talks from him dick" Jack commented.

"And Ass!" Lillian piped up from Jack's arms. Devon pouted.

"Oh whatever. So I heard you have news for us?" Tyler asked with a smile. My eyebrows furrowed as I leaned into Jennifer's side as I sat Indian style and someone stole the remote from me.

"What do you mean?" I asked him in a confused tone. I didn't say anything about news to him.

"Edward texted us to come over because he had news that Carlisle and Esme told him. What is it?" He asked. Oh I see now. Ugh thank you Edward for leaving the news to me.

"Carlisle was offered a job as chief of medicine in a different hospital other than Forks" I said. His eyebrows furrowed confused. The others didn't have expressions and they just looked to me for an explanation.

"That's great. Why was Edward so upset?" Lillian asked me curiously as she stole the remote and landed on the movie The Ugly Truth. I internally smirked. It would be like them to pick that movie.

"It's in Los Angeles" I said finally and they all stopped talking and faced me. They all looked at one another and their eyes landed on me.

"What?" Jack asked with a hardened tone. I nodded and curled my legs under me without bumping Jennifer.

"Yeah, but I decided if Carlisle does take it, I'm going to live with Charlie for the rest of the school year then I'll join them in Los Angeles; if I really want to. It won't be that bad" I said trying to lighten the conversation. Unfortunately, it didn't work. Lillian and Jack shared a look then Jack looked to me straight in the eye.

"What about Edward?" He asked. I shifted uncomfortably and bit my lip. This was very awkward.

"He'll go with Esme and Carlisle" I said quietly. Jack shook his head and looked away from me but didn't say anything.

"Bella are you sure that's what you want?" Devon asked me leaning forward so that his arms were on his knees.

"It's not what I want, but it's what best. I can live with Charlie for the meantime; you know connect with him, Leah, Seth, Sue. We have Skype, cell phones, and planes" I explained. They all just looked at me sadly. Jack just looked to Lillian as they shared a look then looked back to me. Devon just shook his head and stared at me.

"It's not the same Bella. He'll miss you so much. Did you even tell him?" Devon asked again. I bit my lip and shook my head.

"Not yet" I admitted. His eyes widened as he sat back and ran a hand through his hair.

"Shit. You need to" Jack spoke up. I leaned into Jennifer who rubbed my arm soothingly. It did help.

"I know I will" I said. That's when my boy decided to make his entrance.

"You'll what? And move over Jennifer that's my spot" Edward joked as Jennifer rolled her eyes and moved over one. Edward took over and I leaned into him as he put an arm around me. Jack gave me a look as Jennifer took the remote and switched it to The Hangover.

"I'm hungry anyone want to help me with food?" Devon asked looking to me. I glared.

"No one wants to help you Devon" Edward said. Devon stuck out his tongue and flipped off Edward before leaving to the kitchen.

"So Edward, read any good books lately?" Jack asked. Edward rolled his eyes and threw a pillow at him.

"I don't read anything you asshole. And what's going on? You're all acting different. Did Devon hit his head on the coffee table again? I'll go get the ice" Edward asked as he sighed and got up. I looked to my lap as Devon flicked my knee.

"Oww!" I squealed and glared. "What the heck?" I asked angrily. He shrugged and drummed on his lap.

"So Edward what's the news?" Jack as Edward returned with an ice pack in a towel and chucked it at Devon.

"Here, dumbass. And oh Carlisle got a job offer and we all might move to LA" He said sadly and put his arm back over my shoulder.

"Tell him" Lillian coughed every so subtly and Edward raised a brow.

"Bless you?" He asked. Lillian thanked him and smiled at me. I nodded back to her.

"But I was thinking maybe once we get there and get settled in you guys can fly out and we'll all have fun, does that sound fun love?" Edward smiled at me. I smiled and nodded.

"Yeah definitely!" I smiled and Devon stared me down. I looked away from under his glare and sat up straighter.

"Actually I had a different plan on my mind" I said being honest. Edward raised a brow at me and gave me a face that said 'Really?' I swallowed and looked at him with a soft expression.

"What is that?" He asked curiously. I took a small breath and licked my lips.

"I thought that I could stay here." I said. He furrowed his brows together and looked at me with confusion.

"What are you talking about?" He asked starting to get upset and he understood what I was saying.

"I meant to say that while you and the others went to California with Carlisle and Esme I could stay here with Charlie and Sue until the end of senior year then go to college in California if I still want to" I said with a shaky voice. He was silent at first and he just stared at the sofa with a hard expression on his face. He glanced at me with blank look on his face then looked down the couch. His arm on my shoulder suddenly felt like a pile of bricks weighing me down.

"I'm getting a snack" Lillian said as she got up awkwardly and slowly walked towards the kitchen.

"I'll help" Jack said getting up as well. Devon was playing on his iPhone and he and Jennifer got up and Devon looked to her with an awkward smile.

"Here I'll show you a cool Facebook trick in the kitchen. If you copy and paste +[151017314961489:0] but delete the + sign then comment then it turns into a link that says I Love You." He said with a smile as they walked to the kitchen. (This actually works. I tried it on my Facebook and it legit works. You should all try it).

"Way to go Devon" Edward murmured then stayed quiet. After what felt like several minutes he looked up to me and then to the kitchen and his eyes zeroed in on the garage door across from the pantry. He then looked to the key rack where several keys lay.

"Bella, I'm going for a drive. This place has no food and I'm getting lunch. Tell the others to text me what they want from Wendy's; I already know what you want" He said quietly as he slowly walked to the key rack and tried to find which keys were his. His face grew frustrated and he began to have that similar crease in his forehead as he took all the keys off the rack that were in front of his pair and threw them in a blue glass bowl. I was afraid he'd shatter it and was about to speak out when he found his keys and stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind him. I guess fate had a funny way of telling me to let him cool down.

I sighed and got up to find Devon, Lillian, Jennifer, and Jack all sitting on the floor throwing colored goldfish at each other and Jack feeding Lillian a green goldfish. The other side of the pantry was Devon and Jennifer and Jennifer has a cheese in a can bottle cackling as she sprayed it all over Devon's annoyed face. I rose and brow and knocked on the door.

"Oh hey Bells" Jennifer giggled and continued spraying Devon. Where Edward found his friends I shall never know.

"Hey to you too. Um, Edward wants you guys to text him what you want from Wendy's, he's getting lunch" I muttered. They all brightened and told Jack what they wanted as he whipped out his phone and started texting Edward.

"Hey Bells what do you want?" Jack asked as he was typing on his phone. I chuckled and remembered what he told me before he left.

"He already knows" I answered quietly and left the pantry.

Edward (Platt)

"So three Baconaters combos all with Cokes, one asiago chicken club combo with a diet Coke, one chicken Caesar wrap combo with a lemonade, and one apple pecan salad with an iced tea" I read from the text message Jack sent me.

"That's all?" The man on the other end of the voice box asked. I stared at the menu and nodded.

"Yeah: I said and drove off into the window. I paid quickly and got the bags of food then drove off. I turned on the radio and decided to distract myself from the one subject I was trying to avoid the most. A Thousand Years by Christina Perri came on and it reminded me of Caitlin. Little Caite. I hummed along and started going home when my mind wandered to the one subject I was trying to avoid. Whether or not Carlisle would take the LA job and my girlfriend staying here without me. There would be a whole in my chest from where she filled it.

Bella. My sweet Bella. Did she want to want leave stay because of me? I understood why she wanted to stay with Charlie; to get to know him more, be with him. She loved him. I grew angry as I thought of my family and I in an airport with all our luggage and Bella not there with us to get on the plane to California. I also grew jealous as Alice and Jasper, James and Victoria along with the others; they had one another in California. They had their loves. They weren't leaving their girlfriends or boyfriends behind. Only me. I felt my fingers tighten the around my steering wheel and breathe in an air through my nose.

I didn't understand why she chose that decision if we were to move. Why didn't she want me? I'm wanted by everyone its part of my charm but for some reason she was immune to it. I wanted her to want me there with her. I wanted to run with her on the sunny beach on a warm day as we walked along the pier and went to the little shops and had the day to just be us. I wanted to stay together and not be so far away from each other. I wanted to see her in person not on Skype or a picture. I wanted to talk to her and be able to touch her, not just hear her voice on a phone. Most importantly I wanted her to want me as much as I wanted her.

The question 'Why?' is probably what you're thinking. Why does Edward want to spend the day with Bella on the beach? Why does he want to be around her and be a bedroom away instead of a plane ride? Why does he want to be around her, feel her skin and see hear laugh in person instead of through a screen on a computer? Why does he want to hear her voice in front of his face and see the cute expression she makes when she talks instead of using a phone?

Why? Because I love her.

I froze and abruptly stopped my car in the middle of the empty rode leading up to the small secret pathway to my house. I had no thoughts running through my mind, I had no emotion. I felt numb but after a moment I thought of what I just said to myself and leaned back just taking it in. I've never loved a girl anything more than just a best friend or a family member. I was never in love with a girlfriend, maybe at the time I did, but I didn't. I didn't feel that longing that I felt with Bella when I was away from her. I didn't feel that tingly warm feeling inside whenever I saw her smile or laugh. I never lost my train of thought or forgot what I was doing when I caught her staring at me or see her blush. I never felt my heart skip a beat when I saw her looking beautiful in that bridesmaid dress of hers. I never felt that with any of my girlfriends except Bella.

Then I realized the number one thing that was running through my dumbass head at the moment then grinned. It felt like I had my Yoda moment.

I was in love with Bella Swan.

Ok I know you all hate me so much right now and you all think I'm a bitch for not updating but I have a life outside of fanfiction. I mean don't get me wrong I love fanfiction, but I've been so busy with my new babysitting job I had to resort to when my mom made me get a job, and I started new school year and had sports, and I do cheerleading at school and outside of school so I had competitions, and practices and all that shit but I'm so sorry and I'm back(:

XOXO Lizzy