"You know what we have to do now don't you?" Alfred said softly and heard Francis moan into the pillow next to him. "Don't give me that shit. This is your fault." He growled kicking at the nude mans leg.

Francis snorted turning his face sideways to speak. "Oh yes of course it is just MY fault mon petit imbécile. You and your butting in had nothing to do with it."

"Shut up. That's not the point, we have to fix it."

"Cher, I know what you are thinking but how in the world are we going to pull that off?" Francis asked pulling his arms under him so he could lean up a little and look at the American who was pulling off a living model of Le Penseur at the edge of his bed.

"I don't know…Look we will just have to lay the ground work and worry about our grand finale when we get there alright."

"You're a dunce. That's a terrible plan." Francis muttered.

"Shut it. It the best I've got alright now get up. We have a lot of work to do." Alfred said standing and stretching giving Francis a fantastic view of his semi hard morning wood.

"Why must we rush? Perhaps we should…relax. Maybe a new idea will…cum to us oui?" Francis asked wiggling his eyebrows. Alfred made a half snort half lauging noise and flashed his rougish smile before leaning onto the bed and crawling forward. "You have a sexy ass Francis. I would hate to have to beat it without being buried inside of you at the time." He said a hand coming down and playfully smacking Francis exposed bottom making the Frenchman yelp and curse in some colorful Louisiana French as Alfred laughed and got out of the bed to dress.

!#$%^&*()!#$%^&*()_+

Arthur knew something was off the minute he walked into his office. He couldn't place his finger on what it was exactly was causing this odd feeling off unbalance in him. He had checked over his desk. Everything seemed in place. No one had seemed to have moved anything from it. It wasn't until he sat down in his chair that he realized what it was. A small unicorn was standing beside his computer. He reconized it as the one he used to keep on him in his younger years in his pocket. Forged of metal, the small beast was reared up on its hind legs its horn pointed majestically skyward its mane blowing in a false wind. Arthur reached a shaking hand forward but stopped. Taking a deep breath he looked away from the old trinket and booted up his PC.

Ten botched attempts to gain access to the mechanical data keeper had him cursing up a storm and about ready to shove the damn thing off his desk. He knew he hadn't changed the password and around the sixth try he knew someone was messing with him. Taking a shaking breath Arthur stood up from his desk and started to pace. He glanced back at the tiny figurine and licked his licks before stalking towards the computer and typing again

u n i c o r n

"Welcome Arthur." A female voice chimed from the computers speakers as it accepted the password and started to log on.

"Dear God." He breathed out falling back into his chair. As the background filled his screen with two beautiful pure white unicorns lay in the grass together staring back at him.

Arthur slowly got to his feet and grabbed his coat swiftly retreating from his workplace before nearly running to his car. He ripped the door open and practically threw himself into the safety of the vehicle. With shaking hands he shoved his key into the ignition only to still as something in his peripheral caught his attention as it swung back and forth from his rearview mirror. A little glass rocking horse unicorn dangled from the mirror. "Son of a bitch." He turned the key with overly vigorous jerk, his car rumbled to life and the band America filled his ears telling him about what he would see when the last eagle flys and the last lion roars. "Ah bloody hell!" Arthur screamed ejecting the CD and throwing it out his car window. Someone was fucking with him. And that meant someone was going to die. Two someone's if his intuition was right.

!#$%^&*()_+!#$%^&*()_+

"Do you think he is gonna come?" Alfred asked looking up at the sky.

"I have no doubt he will Cher. All it will take is one phone call to either of our secretaries and they will tell him right where we are and he will be her faster than a jackrabbit on speed…" Francis kicked at the grass and looked back that the beast they had brought with them. "My only worry is what will happen to us when he gets here."

!#$%^&*()_+!#$%^&*()_+

Arthur had never been so angry in his whole life. It had taken him only minutes to find out where they were hiding. But it had taken him hours and countless unicorn plushies, figurines, and posters to make his way there. Before he had managed to leave the parking lot his secretary had caught up with him and handed him a gigantic basket filled to the brim with unicorn stuffed animals and figurines of all shapes and sizes and colors. The bottom of the basket was filled with unicorn confetti and even the handle on the damn thing was 26 connected unicorns making a full arch. She said it had just been dropped off for him but there was no card or anything. No card was needed he was going to take this basket and beat them to death with it!

A stuffed unicorn was given to him at the train ticket counter. Another at the car rental. Three smaller ones from a gas station attendant when he had to stop and fill the tank. A figurine and a poster at the information center when he'd gotten lost. And then he'd nearly lost it when he had arrived at the equestrian center only to be given a pure white horse with the name Lady Amalthea to take out and find the men he was going to slaughter.

When he was close enough Arthur dropped down off his horse and stormed towards them red faced and furious. "What the bloody hell is wrong with you!" He yelled stalking towards them. Before Alfred could even answer Arthur swung at him cracking him right across the jaw, dropping him to the ground. Whipping around he faced Francis next. "You think it's funny!" He raged tears starting to build in his eyes making them burn. Francis held his hands up in surrender as the smaller man advanced on him. "Now mon cher-" "Don't you mon cher my you frog! Don't you dare! How dare you mock me! How dare you, you bastard!"

"We were just trying to help." Francis said with a sheepish smile sending Arthur over the edge. All gentlemanly ways forgotten he launched himself at the other blond taking them to the ground and pulling his fist back to brake his stupid perfect nose when something caught his eye. A fourth horse. A fourth horse off to the side he hadn't seen at first. It was all white and had a giant narwhale horn stuck to its forehead. The tears finally broke free and laughter bubbled from his mouth. "Y-You are both idiots." He laughed sitting up a little to lean his head back and laugh. "What were you going to try and convince me that was a real unicorn?"

He was laughing so hard his sides were hurting when Alfred rolled towards them pouting. "Oh come one Arti. Its not that bad is it? We thought it looked pretty good."

"Prety good?" Arthur crackled tears pouring down his face as he rolled into another fit of glee. "What did you do? Glue that horn on? Isn't that inhumane?"

"My cher…I haven't seen you so beautiful in quite a while. We were hoping that this would get you to forgive us…for being such fools." Francis said and Arthurs laughter died down though he chuckled once more when he looked at the poor fake unicorn with the horn glued to its head.

"Your both idiots you know." Arthur said rolling off Francis to lay in-between the two other countries. "But I think…if you make it worth my time coming all the way out here…I could forgive you."

!#$%^&*()_+!#$%^&*()_+

Three apology rounds later while they all lay out sleeping Arthur awoke. He blinked his eyes tiredly trying to figure out what had brought him out of his slumber only suck in a sharp breath.

There standing before him was the singularly most beautiful beast he had ever seen. A unicorn. A real, live, pure as fresh snow, unicorn stood before him. "Uni…I thought I had lost you forever." He said, his voice nearly a whisper. The creature lowered its head and touched its horn to Arthurs forehead so that they could speak.

"Silly little Arthur. I have been waiting for you." She said her voice like silver bells in his mind.

"But Uni! I looked everywhere for you."Arthur insisted.

"I know child but I had to wait."

"Wait for what?" Arthur asked frowning.

"For you to forgive." She replied gently.

"Forgive? Forgive who? Francis?"

"In part Francis yes, but mostly child. I had to wait for you to forgive yourself." Her voice filled his mind to every corner to the point he felt lightheaded. That was all. He had only needed to forgive himself? "You held so much guilt Arthur that it was not I who left you but you who forced yourself to no long see. Once your forgave Francis and in turn yourself for your 'betrayal' to me you regained your sight."

Arthur closed his eyes and reached a hand forward to touch her. "I have missed you Uni. I'm sorry I made you wait so long."

She laughed gently. "It's alright child. But now you must sleep. I think your lovers will be coming to soon and want to play another round to show you how sorry they are."

"Will I see you again?" Arthur asked.

"Oh I'm sure of it. When the times are right and you need me most I will come to you as I always have. Sleep well little once and know that I am here when you need me."

Arthur didn't remember falling back to sleep but when he awoke again he was wrapped tightly in Francis's and Alfreds arms and he smiled. He could tell them what happened. That they helped him once again see his precious unicorns…or he could let them continue to owe him apology sex for the next century or so…Yes that seemed like a swell idea. It wasn't like they would believe him anyways so why not milk it for what it was worth. It would be a sin to waste an opportunity to have them both wrapped around his finger anyway. No need to pass up on great sex. Who said he couldn't have his cake and eat it too.

END

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Side notes- The song playing in Arthurs car was the last unicorn by America. Listen to it it's amazing. And the name Lady Amalthea comes from the movie the last unicorn for those of you who haven't seen it.