17

Thankfully, Sam Uley hadn't messed with Bella's car, and she was just where she had left her when Edward whisked her away to the safety of his home, and his arms if she was being honest. Edward had sparked something inside her, something she hadn't felt in too long. When he held her, she felt safe, secure, even . . . cared for, and when he kissed her . . . Well, when he kissed her, she wanted more.

Though she didn't want to, she drove back to Carlisle's, knowing she couldn't keep running. She had spent the last ten years running away from home, and now she was running out of time. He was dying, and she needed to stop running, to face the ghosts of her past while she still had the chance.

But, instead of climbing out of the car and heading into the house, where all the lights were on, and there were half a dozen cars in the driveway, Bella parked next to the front curb, her eyes automatically shifting to the house across the street, two doors down. Her father was inside that house, with Alice. He was bedridden, but inside that house and that scared her, him being so close.

Bella was startled when the passenger door to her car opened and Jasper climbed in, slinging his arm on the back of her seat. He looked from her to the house and back. Even though he put that cheeky smile on his face, she saw the fear in his eyes, and understood: he was worried about Alice.

"She's fine," Bella said, nodding. "He's bedridden, so . . ."

"Oh, yeah, I know." He waved her off, but she still saw the fear, the doubt. Inhaling a sharp breath, he turned in his seat so that he was facing her. "Tell me about L.A."

"What about it?"

Jasper shrugged his shoulders. "Just about it. See a lot of celebrities?"

"No," she laughed. "It's . . . I don't know. It's just . . . It's L.A. It's busy, like all the time, but at the same time, there is this calmness that just . . . I don't know to explain it. It's just home."

"Sounds boring," he scoffed, dropping his arm from the back of her seat. He looked back to the house. "I used to have a crush on you. Bet you didn't know that."

"You're right, I didn't," she admitted, causing him to smile and turn back toward her.

"I was twelve, and you had boobs," he snickered. "I thought you were beautiful, and you broke my heart when you left."

Bella frowned.

"You broke all of our hearts," he confessed. "Mine, Mom's, Ro's . . . you were our family and you and Carlisle just left us behind. We fought for you, B, and yet you left us behind."

"I did," she whispered, bringing her elbow up and propping it on the driver's door, leaning her head against the palm of her hand. "I'm sorry, Jay. I . . . I'm just sorry."

"I don't blame you," he said, and when she looked at him, he added, "I mean I understood."

"You didn't, though," she whispered, her eyes filling with tears. "You had a good dad, who loved you so much, Jasper. And Lottie . . . Lottie never lets a day go by without telling you how much she loves you. I never had that. All I heard was how stupid and lazy and ugly I was, so you don't know, and I'm glad you don't. I'm glad you had a good mom and a dad who loved you. Just wish I had one, too."

Bella sniffed as she threw open the door and climbed out of the car, using her foot to kick it shut, before she started up the front pathway, but Jasper grabbed her arm, spun her around, and tugged her into his arms, holding her as she sobbed, as she cried, as she grieved.

"I'm sorry, Jasper. I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologize," he whispered, pressing his lips against the top of her head. "Don't apologize again, B. You're amazing and perfect, just the way you are."

"I'm not," she whimpered, pulling herself out of his arms, her eyes shifting to the house across the street, two doors down. "If I were, I'd have been able to save her, protect her from him, but I failed. Like I do at everything."

Bella wrapped her arms around herself and turned, heading up to the front porch and into the house. Jasper didn't follow, not that she expected him to. He'd fallen in love with Alice, worried about her inside that house. He would stay outside, watching until he knew she was safe, until Edward walked back into the lion's den, faced that monster inside. Bella, however, wasn't brave enough to face that house, face him inside that house. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

When Bella walked into the house, she found Carlisle, Rosalie, Charlotte, and Esme seated in the living room with Jake and Seth, both of whom stood up, giving her a cautionary look. She paused, shifting her eyes from each of them one by one until they landed on Carlisle last. He made to step toward her, but when Bella moved backward, Esme reached out and grabbed his arm, pulling him back.

"I'm sorry," she whispered before she turned and ran upstairs and into her bedroom, slamming the door shut. She fell forward, dropping to her knees as she cried.

—You—

Eventually, Bella managed to drag herself off the floor and made her way out onto the roof, sitting with her knees pulled up to her chest. Just before nine o'clock, she saw Edward's big black truck pull up in front, and when he climbed out of the driver's seat, he turned and looked at Carlisle's house, his eyes meeting hers, and even from across the street and two doors down, she saw him smile at her. He gave her a wave before he turned and headed into the house.

"Are you planning on hiding out here all night?"

Sighing, Bella looked over at the window to her bedroom, where Rosalie was sticking her head out. "Probably."

She smiled and climbed out, scooting over so that she was sitting next to her. "I don't come here anymore. Not since you left."

"Why not?" she asked.

Rosalie shrugged. "It wasn't the same without you."

Bella frowned.

"You were my big sister, and you left, B. You left us to pick up the pieces."

She nodded. "I did."

Rosalie slipped her arm in with Bella's, leaning her head on her shoulder. "I missed you so much, B."

"I missed you, too, Ro," she whimpered, her eyes filling with tears. "Tell me about Emmett."

Rosalie smiled and leaned away. "He's . . . I don't know if I can describe him. He's funny and sweet and passionate," she murmured, bringing her hand up to her lips. "He's protective of his family. He moved here for Edward. Did you know that?"

Biting the inside of her lip, Bella nodded. "He told me."

"I wasn't sure how much Edward had told you. Emmett said he's really private. Doesn't talk about his wife to anyone, not even him and Garrett."

"Oh."

"Do you like him, B? Edward, I mean. Do you like him?"

She inhaled a sharp breath as her eyes shifted to the house across the street, two doors down as the front door opened and Edward walked Alice out onto the front porch. They spoke for a moment before hugging and she walked toward the house. Edward looked up once more, right at Bella she knew. He brought his hand up, waving again before he turned and walked back into the house.

"I do," Bella whispered, tearing her eyes from the house and looking at Rosalie. "He makes feel again, Ro."

"Feel what?" she asked.

"Just . . ." Bella shook her head before she sighed. "Just feel anything other than dead inside. When we left, when it got to be too hard for Carlisle to be around me, I shut myself away from everyone, everything that mattered in my life, except my art. I threw myself into my work because it was all I had left," she cried, pulling away when Rosalie reached for her. "Don't touch me. I can't . . . I can't handle that right now."

"Okay, B."

"I'm sorry," she whimpered, taking a deep breath and trying to call herself. "I'm a little overwhelmed right now."

"I'd say you're a lot overwhelmed right now."

"I told him," she whispered, tilting her head toward the side and looking at her. "My dad, I mean. I walked into his room at The Traymore and I told him how I feel. How he made me feel. He said he was sorry. He's sorry, Ro," she wept. "He looked me in the eye and said he was sorry for beating me, for hating me my entire life. How am I supposed to respond to that?"

"I don't know." Rosalie slowly reached out, placing her hand on top of Bella's. "Did it help? Telling him, I mean. Did it help you feel better?"

Bella shook her head. "If anything, I feel worse," she confessed. "He's dying, Ro, and I can't let go of my anger long enough to even let him die in peace."

"Do you have to? Let go of your anger, I mean?" she asked before she sighed. "I watched you fall apart, B. Every time he put his hands on you, when you would escape and find yourself hiding from him here, I watched you fall apart, and . . ."

"And?" Bella pressed.

Rosalie frowned before saying, "I hated that we were being put in the middle of everything."

"Oh," she said, pulling her hand away from her.

"I know it's selfish, but we were always that family, you know? The ones that meddled in Chief Swan's family business. When you and Carlisle left, people . . . people said things, B, and it was hard."

"What'd they say?" she asked.

"I shouldn't have said anything," Rosalie groused, wrapping her arms around her knees.

"Ro, what did they say? And who said it? Was it Uley? Because it sounds like Uley."

"Just people," she insisted, giving her a look that made it clear it was Uley, and the rest of the Forks Police Department. "Charlie went a little . . . crazy when he realized you were gone. Once he'd sobered up and realized what he had done, I guess. He came over and started beating on the door. Mom called Sam and Jared, but when they got here, they were more interested in finding out where you and Carlisle had ran off to than the fact their boss was threatening to beat the shit about of Mom if she didn't tell him where you were."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you were free, B."

Bella shook her head. "I've never been free."

"No, I suppose you haven't." Rosalie turned and crawled over to the window, but stopped and said, "If you like him, if he makes you happy again, B, don't let my idiot brother get in the way. You deserve to be happy, and so does Edward. He's a good guy."

"Thanks, Ro," she whimpered.

Rosalie smiled, though it didn't quite meet her eyes as she turned and climbed back into the house, leaving Bella to sit on the roof, staring at the house across the street, two doors down.

—You—

Early in the morning, well before the sun was going to rise, Bella found herself standing in the street in front of the house across the street, two doors down. The house that had been the center of her nightmares for her entire life. She tried to think if she had any happy memories there, and she couldn't think of one. How sad was that? Not one happy memory.

Bella inhaled a sharp breath when the front door opened and Edward walked out, pulling a hoody over his head. He shoved his hands into his pockets as he walked down the handful of steps, along the pathway, and to the curb.

"Hey," he murmured.

"Hey," she whispered, her eyes shifting from him to the house and back. "Is he okay?"

Edward nodded as he looked back before saying, "He was in a lot of pain, so I upped his meds a little. He's asleep right now."

"Oh." Bella brought her hand up to her chest, toying with the collar of her T-shirt. "I shouldn't have come over here."

"Then why did you?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I was worried about you."

Edward grinned. "Me, huh?"

Bella rolled her eyes. "About you being inside there . . . with him. And I know he's bedridden, but . . . I still worry."

"I was worried about you, too," Edward confessed.

"Why?"

"Because you were over there with him," he said, gesturing toward Carlisle's house.

"He won't hurt me."

"Maybe not physically," he added. "But emotionally, mentally is a different story, don't you think?"

Bella frowned, wrapping her arms around herself. "I suppose that's fair, given what you heard this morning. Or yesterday morning."

"Did you talk to him?"

She shook her head. "Why were your brothers worried about me?"

"Why wouldn't they be?" he countered. "They know you're important to Rosalie and Jasper." Edward paused. "Me."

Bella couldn't stop from smiling. "I'm important to you?"

Edward nodded, grinning. "Very important."

"You're, um, you're important to me, too," she whispered, wrapping her arms around herself, but before she could say anything else, the sound of her father screaming trickled from inside the house. "You have to go."

"I do," he said, shifting so that he was turning away from her. "Ben is relieving me at six. Want to come over and have breakfast again?"

"I'd love to," she said, taking a step backward when her father screamed again. "Be careful, okay? Promise?"

"I promise," he said, before he turned and hurried back into the house, taking her heart with him.

Thank you for all the AMAZING reviews! This chapter was a real bitch to get through. Bella was keeping a lot close to her chest.