Chapter 36

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Alexis was uncharacteristically quiet when they picked her up from the train station on Saturday. Even when Zoey, who never failed to cheer her up, tried to engage her, Alexis would only respond half-heartedly.

Kate and Castle exchanged concerned looks but didn't comment until they entered the loft.

"So, Alexis, how were your finals?" Castle said, adding reassuringly, "You know, even if you think you did horribly, it's nothi—"

"—He broke up with me!" Alexis blurted out and then immediately burst into tears.

"What?" Castle said, completely thrown off by the sudden emotional outburst.

"James! He broke up with me yesterday!"

Kate gathered Alexis into her arms. "I'm so sorry, Alexis."

Castle, meanwhile, seemed to be taking just as badly. "He broke up with you?" he exclaimed. "Oh, that little punk, I'm gonna kill him!"

"Good to know who I should arrest when I find his dead body," Kate replied wryly.

"I'm not kidding, Kate. That little cretin hurt her!" He pulled Alexis into his own bone-crushing hug. "Don't worry, pumpkin, I'll—"

"—dad, stop," Alexis said between sobs, "Don't kill him. It's not… I don't think he meant to hurt me."

"Well, meant to or not, he did!" Castle replied, "Do you still have his number, trust m—"

"Dad!" Alexis pushed him away. "Please! You're making it worse." She ran up the stairs.

"Oh, no you don't," Kate said, holding up a hand to stop him when he looked like he was about to follow.

"How am I making it worse?" he huffed.

"Stay down here," Kate ordered and then pointed over to where Zoey was sitting wide-eyed on the living room couch. "Maybe explain to Zo why her older sister just burst into tears."

"Kate, I should go talk to her," Castle pleaded.

Kate shook her head firmly. "No. I will go talk to her."

"Do not say this is a girl thing."

"When have I ever said that about anything?" Kate replied, "Look, clearly, I'm the level-headed one here."

"Ka—"

"—Nuh-uh. Stay down here and calm down, Castle. I mean it."

Kate disappeared up the stairs a second later. She knocked gently on Alexis' door, not surprised when she didn't receive an answer. Still, she eased the door open slowly. "Alexis," she said, "It's me."

Alexis was lying face down on her bed with her head buried under a pillow. Her voice was muffled when she finally spoke, "At least he had the decency to wait until after finals, right?"

Kate sat down cross-legged beside her. "What happened?" she asked after she heard less sniffling on Alexis' end.

Alexis turned her head, bright blue eyes staring up at Kate. "He's graduating."

Kate nodded sympathetically. "Moving back to Toronto?"

"No. London."

"England?"

Alexis stared at her strangely. "Is there another London?"

"Well, actually, there's one close to Tor—you know what, that's not important. Did James not want to do a long-distance relationship?" she asked instead.

"I guess but that's not the way he phrased it," Alexis answered.

"How did he phrase it?"

"He said that while we used to be in the same stage of our lives, he couldn't be with me anymore because he's moving on to another phase. That we're young and there are plenty of other people to meet."

Kate winced. "Okay… so, he could have phrased it better."

"You think?"

"But the real question is: were you planning on staying with him even if he hadn't broken up with you? Could you have done a long-distance relationship?"

Alexis moaned and buried her head again. "I don't know."

Kate ran her fingers soothingly through Alexis' long hair. "Do you need me to go out and get you some Cherry Garcia?"

"Can we watch a gory horror movie and pretend one of the victims is James?"

"Absolutely. Your dad'll love that."

.

"Hi grandpa!" Zoey raised her arms, indicating that she wanted Jim to pick her up.

"Oof, you're getting too big for me," Jim joked, lifting her up, "You're growing so fast, you'll be taller than grandpa soon."

Zoey giggled. "You're silly."

"Hi dad," Kate said, kissing Jim on the cheek.

"I thought Alexis would be joining us," Jim said.

"Oh," Kate grimaced, "James broke up with her on Friday."

"Ouch."

"Yeah," Castle chimed in from behind Kate, "She decided to go over to a friend's house. Said she would feel weird talking about ways to murder James in front of Kate." He shut the door and then offered Jim the container full of brownies. "We brought the dessert."

"Katie…"

"What? Dad, Zo and Castle made them yesterday while I was at work. Zoey wanted you to try them," Kate said.

Jim shook his head, clearly not believing his daughter. Accepting the brownies, he said, "And I'm guessing you came over early so that you could cook the entire dinner as well?"

Kate shrugged and smiled. "Well, if you're not already done, I might as well help."

Ever since Zoey had entered her life, Kate had been making more of an effort to see her dad on a regular basis. Eventually, this had led to weekly Sunday night dinners, mostly at their house although, occasionally, they went out. This was the first time they had gone over to her dad's for dinner. He had had minor surgery done earlier in the week and even though he had insisted he was fine, Kate hadn't wanted him driving or doing anything he didn't have to.

"I'm guessing you don't make dinner often," Jim commented as he observed Kate following the open recipe book to the letter.

"Castle's the better cook," she answered, distracted with finding the measuring spoons.

"Thank you for finally admitting it," Castle exclaimed, timing his entrance perfectly. He leaned against the threshold to the kitchen so that he could keep an eye on Zoey in the living room.

"I never said you weren't," Kate replied, glancing over her shoulder with a smirk.

"Yes, but you never said I was better, either."

"Your ego's big enough without me helping it along," Kate retorted.

"Now, now, children," Jim said, humoured as always by Kate and Castle's constant back-and-forth. His admonishment didn't seem to slow them down, though, and they continued until he interrupted. "—So, have you two started wedding preparations yet?"

Kate turned her head away from the pot she was stirring. "That's out of the blue, dad."

"Martha and I have been talking—"

"Whoa, whoa," Castle said, interrupting Jim, "You've been talking to my mother? About what?"

"The two of you," Jim said, "Obviously."

Kate rolled her eyes, "Well, at least you're honest."

"Now, we both realise that you two just wanted to enjoy being engaged for a while—"

"—Mm," Castle made a tiny noise of objection, "Kate wanted to enjoy being engaged for a while, I—"

Kate glared at Castle, "Would you let my dad finish?"

Castle held up his hands in innocence.

Jim looked back and forth between the two of them before continuing, "—but it's been, what, five months since your engagement?" He directed his next phrase to his daughter, knowing exactly what Castle had wanted to say, "Katie, I really think you should start thinking about it."

"We've just finished planning Lanie's wedding, dad," Kate replied and then to Castle, said, "Remember how much you hated that?"

"Yes," Castle agreed readily, "But that was Lanie's wedding."

"I think what he means to say," Jim said before Kate could interject, "is that planning your own wedding would be different."

"And we can get a wedding planner to do all the stressing for us," Castle added, "The one my mother used for her wedding to Roman has been calling incessantly. It's getting a little annoying, actually."

Jim and Castle both looked expectantly at Kate, who didn't respond. The expression on Castle's face grew less and less playful the longer Kate stayed silent until he was downright anxious.

"Katie," Jim started gently, "I was merely making a suggestion."

"I know, dad, but can we just put the wedding talk on hold right now?" Kate looked at Castle, "Okay?"

Castle nodded. "Yeah, of course." A beat, then, "We're…"

"…fine," Kate said, eyes sincere. "Now," she gestured towards the living room, "Can you go check on Zo before she decides to break something?"

"Katie?" Jim prodded after Castle had left the kitchen. "What's really going on here?"

"Nothing," she answered, washing the romaine hearts.

"Have you changed your m—"

"—no. I want to get married and I want to get married to Castle," she said with no doubt in her voice whatsoever. She stopped shredding the lettuce and leaned forward against the sink, bracing herself with her hands. "Daddy, I love you," she declared quietly.

Jim stepped forward, rubbing Kate's back gently. "Honey, you know that I know that."

Kate nodded. "I love you so I don't want to sound… I don't want you to—"

"—just tell me, Katie," Jim said reassuringly.

She tilted her head to look at her dad. "When Lanie was picking out her cake and going to her dress fittings and freaking out about her make-up…" she took a deep breath, "…her mom was there." Kate heard her dad's sharp inhale and closed her eyes before continuing. "Even though Lanie found her mom so annoying sometimes, I know she wouldn't have had it any other way. And I know you're here and I have Martha who is just itching to help me but it's…"

"…it's not the same." Jim pulled Kate into a hug. "I know."

"I miss her, daddy. So much. And every time I think about planning my wedding or picking out a dress, I miss her even more."

Jim wasn't ashamed to let his own tears flow freely. "I miss her, too, Katie," he said, "I miss her, too."

.

In bed that night, Castle waited until they were both in bed and the lights had been turned off before saying, "Kate?"

"Yeah?"

"About the whole wedding thing—"

"—Castle, not now," Kate said, turning away from him.

"No, I mean—" Castle shifted closer to Kate, "—I heard what you said tonight. When you were in the kitchen with your dad."

She tensed up. "That was a private conversation, Castle. You shouldn't have been listening."

"I know," he said softly, then after a beat, added, "I wish you had told me."

Kate remained silent and he thought she had decided to ignore him. He propped his head up with his hand and leaned over to peer at her; that's when he saw the tears she was trying so desperately to hide. "Oh, Kate…" he whispered, "I—"

"—don't," she said, her voice raspy, "Castle, please don't come any closer."

He stopped moving but he kept talking. "I don't need a big wedding. In fact, I only want one if you want one. I want whatever you want. I don't care how we get married, Kate, just that we do. How isn't important at all." He crept a little closer, stroking his fingers down her bare arms. "If you want to get married in Vegas, I'm cool with that; if you want to have a ceremony on a cruise ship, I'm on board—" he saw a hint of a smile on Kate's face at his crack "—and if you just want to sign a piece of paper in city hall in front of a Justice of the Peace, I'm okay with that, too."

Kate finally turned around to face him. "I don't want a big wedding," she said.

"Good," he replied, "I was really hoping you didn't."

"I'd be happy if it were just me, you, Zo, Alexis, my dad, your mother… probably Lanie, 'cause she'd kill me if I got hitched without her present…" she drifted off.

Castle smiled. "I like that list."

Kate nodded and inched closer to his body where he immediately wrapped an arm around her. After a few minutes, she said softly, "But I don't just want to go and sign a piece of paper. And I haven't decided when or where."

Castle shrugged and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "When the time's right, we'll know."

"You know I don't believe in that sixth-sense, sign from the universe, feeling, right?"

"Mhm," he said, smiling in her hair. "Lucky for us, I do."

A/N: So, a forewarning? This might be my last update on both this and Eyes Open for the next week or so (at least until after next Tuesday) because real life is going to get super crazy. I have a portfolio to get together and exams so yeah, as much as I love to eschew responsibilities, I really must set my priorities in order! Know that I am super sorry though and if you're reading Eyes Open... I will do my best to update that one first 'cause I left it on a pretty evil cliffhanger... At least we get new episodes? (Seriously don't want to alienate my readers so yeah, apologies for this)! -Violet