9. A Deafening Distance

Severus was thankful that the Christmas holidays began in just a few hours. He had no intention of returning to Spinner's End for the break; he had remained at Hogwarts for all holiday sessions since his first year, refusing to spend any more time than necessary with his abusive father and inept mother. He would much rather stay at the school, where he had constant access to Professor Slughorn's private storeroom, as well as the Potions classroom, where he could continue to experiment on perfecting his brewing skills, uninterrupted by other, inept students.

He had been particularly venomous to anyone who crossed his path since that morning when he left Isadora in the common room. He was following a hunch he had been slowly developing since third year. Remus Lupin, a shabby, sandy-haired Gryffindor who spent most of his time hanging around with James Potter and Sirius Black, disappeared from school once a month, returning a few days later looking even shabbier than usual, and more often than not with a few cuts and bruises. Severus heard rumors that Lupin's mother was particularly ill, and he went home once a month to visit her, but this did not account for the swollen eyes and slash marks that so often peppered the boy's face when he returned to Hogwarts. Ever since last year, Severus had noticed that Potter and Black (as well as that rat-faced, pitiful excuse for a Gryffindor, Peter Pettigrew) had been disappearing around the same time as Lupin; Severus knew they were up to something.

Something that could get them expelled.

When he had left the castle earlier that week, he made sure to bring schoolbooks, to make it seem like he was simply out doing homework on the lawn (even though the weather had been particularly miserable that Sunday). He sat by his usual tree for hours, constantly checking the doors to the castle, watching for anyone coming outside.

He had been ambushed by Sirius Black, who had somehow managed to avoid Severus' eye. Both pointed their wands at one another, mutual hatred filling the space between. It had been Sirius who lowered his wand first, who said he knew what Severus was up to, and that if he was really that curious, all he had to do was follow Madam Pomfrey and Remus when they emerged from the castle.

"See that tree over there, the Whomping Willow?" Sirius had said, pointing to a particularly nasty looking tree up on the hill. "There's a small knot, just press it with a long stick, and you're in."

"You're lying," Severus sneered in return, his wand level with Black's throat.

"Am I?" The tone of his voice was laced with malice as Sirius turned his back to Snape and walked away, hands in his pockets, feeling particularly smug. Severus hadn't lowered his wand until his enemy was back at the entrance to the castle.

He had spent the next two hours seriously considering whether or not to take Black's advice, when he saw two figures emerge from the castle. He crept forward and immediately recognized the secondhand robes belonging to Remus Lupin; the older woman next to him must have been the resident nurse. Any thought of considering why Black had given him this information immediately escaped Severus as he had quietly made his way across the lawn, watching Madam Pomfrey freeze the swinging branches of the willow by pressing the knot with a long stick. She and Lupin disappeared into the trunk of the tree, which started swinging again as soon as the knot was released.

Severus looked around, making sure he wasn't being followed; a break in the clouds allowed for a glimpse at the full moon. Suddenly everything seemed to click.

"Well, well, Lupin," he whispered to himself as he waited for the nurse to reemerge from the tree, "what secrets have you been hiding?"

Madam Pomfrey returned from the tree trunk and made her way back to the castle; when she was out of earshot, Severus darted across the lawn and snatched up the same branch the nurse had tossed aside. Prodding the knot, the tree froze and, after a moment of trepidation, he ran to the base of the tree, which cleverly hid the entrance to an earthen tunnel. After dusting his robes, Severus whispered, "Lumos," and by the light of his wand, made his way silently up the tunnel.

He seemed to have walked forever, and realized he must be making his way closer to Hogsmeade. He paused briefly, listening for what he thought were footsteps behind him, and took off at a run; whoever was following him was not going to stop him from discovering the secret to getting the Marauders expelled.

What happened next Severus only remembered in a blur.

"Snape!" Someone was calling his name from behind him; he turned and pointed his wand down the tunnel. Rage seared through him when the face of his follower emerged in the wand light: James Potter had come down after him, wand at the ready. "You can't go in there, Snape!"

Before he had a chance to reply, a terrible sound echoed from the end of the tunnel, which was just visible to Severus from where he was standing. It sounded like bones breaking, and a man crying out in pain…but not a man. The cries slowly became howls. Severus took another step towards the sounds and saw all he needed to see.

Potter had grabbed Severus from behind, dragging him back down the tunnel towards the Willow. When they emerged and were a safe distance from the tree, Severus wrenched his arm from Potter's grasp and leveled his wand at him once again.

"How very interesting, Potter," he had hissed. "Wait until Dumbledore finds out."

But Dumbledore already knew, much to Severus' chagrin, and the headmaster swore the young man to secrecy. "If you tell a soul, Severus," he had said in a grave tone, "I can only imagine the fallout, for both you and Mr. Lupin."

It had been a week since his talk with Dumbledore, and ever since then, whenever the two had met in the halls, the old man gave Severus a look of extreme caution. The young man knew better than to cross the headmaster, but that didn't change the fact that Remus Lupin was a werewolf.

Severus was in the Potions classroom, waiting impatiently for Isadora to arrive for the final tutoring session of the term. He had originally planned on giving her a particularly nasty potion to work on, which would have kept her up rather late into the evening and thus eliminated any chance of her being able to join the party in the common room before everyone went home for the weekend. But after the events of last week, he had stopped caring about torturing her. He had already shattered two phials in his rage; it would have been a disaster to try and teach her anything tonight. So instead he had nicked a few sweets and a flask of pumpkin juice from the kitchens and set it out for them to enjoy.

He heard footsteps echoing from the hallway outside the classroom and looked up to see Isadora entering, her cauldron swinging carelessly beside her. Her face was very pink, and slowly being taken over by a very large grin.

"Evening, Severus!" she said with such joy it completely threw him off.

"Er…what is going on," he demanded, staring at her suspiciously.

She gave him a confused look as she placed her cauldron on one of the work stations. "What do you mean?" she asked.

"You are never this excited for a tutoring session," he said flatly. "In fact, I believe I've had to drag you in here quite a few times."

Her face became a deep red and she suddenly became very interested in her shoes. "Oh, well…it's nothing, really," she whispered.

He continued to stare at her as he made his way around to where he had stored the food for the evening. Isadora looked up as he placed the cakes on one of the clean tables and raised an eyebrow.

"Are we not tutoring tonight?" she asked.

"I'm not in the mood," Severus answered, handing her a silk napkin. "Plus, it's Christmas. How horrible a friend would I be if I made you concoct some incredibly difficult potion just hours before you were scheduled to go home?" He said all of this like he actually cared; in reality he was too angry to give a damn.

"You could have told me sooner!" she said, pointing at the heavy pewter cauldron she had carried in.

He smirked and shrugged as he offered her a piece of cake.

Isadora munched on the sweet, and they sat in silence; Severus was barely eating anything.

"What's wrong?" she asked through a mouthful of food.

He crossed his arms. "I have no idea what you're –"

"Oh, please, Sev, I'm not bloody stupid," she sighed, crossing the room to stand in front of him. "You've been in a particularly sour mood since the weekend, you've barely answered any questions in class, and you've barely spoken more than a few words to me all week. Something's up."

He sighed. Dumbledore had made him swear. But if he only told Isadora, and swore her to the same secrecy the headmaster had sworn him to, maybe it would be ok. At least then he would have someone to talk to about it. It seemed like that was increasingly becoming Isadora's job in his life; to be the person he could talk to about things.

"Sev," she pushed, her foot tapping impatiently.

"Remember that hunch I had?" he said quietly, walking to the far corner of the classroom and beckoning her to follow.

Her shoes echoed softly on the stone floor as she walked behind him. "Unfortunately!" she answered. "Why are we in the corner?"

Severus scanned the classroom, making absolutely sure nobody else was in the room with them. He put a hand on Isadora's shoulder and whispered, "Lupin is a werewolf."

She stared at him mockingly. "Come off it, Sev," she said, annoyed.

"I'm not kidding! I followed Black Sunday night and saw Lupin with my own eyes!" Severus hissed, now gripping Isadora's shoulders with both hands. "Potter and Black know, they've been helping him. And Dumbledore, he knows. He's known since Remus came to the school!"

She continued to stare blankly at him, a look somewhere between utter disbelief and fear flickering across her face. "You're serious?" she asked quietly.

"Yes," he said with force. "Dumbledore swore me to secrecy –"

"Then why the hell are you telling me?" Isadora barked, stepping away from him.

"Because we're friends!" Severus shouted, pounding a fist against the wall beside him. "We're friends and I trust you and I know you won't go running your mouth to everyone." He was breathing heavily, angrily.

Isadora blinked and took a step forward. "How long have you known?" she whispered.

"A few months now. He disappears at the full moon and comes back a haggard mess. What else could possibly be happening to him?" Severus answered in a low voice, massaging the bridge of his nose as if he had a migraine. He felt her hand rest gently on his arm. "How'd it go with Black the other day?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Regulus?" she said, laughing. "Oh, you know…he asked me out." Her voice raised an octave as she said this.

Severus looked up, his eyebrows raised. "Did he now?" He could tell how excited she was. "That's…nice." He wasn't quite sure how to congratulate her.

She nodded, her cheeks the same shade of pink they were when she first entered the classroom. "It's kind of freezing in here, Sev," she said, looking around. "How about we head back to the common room? I have to pack soon anyway."

He had almost forgotten that she was leaving for the holidays. "Before I forget," he said, crossing the room and rummaging through his bag. He pulled out a wrinkled sheet of parchment and handed it to her, "you'll need to pick up these supplies for when we come back. I'm trying to get as many N.E.W.T level potions in next term as possible, since I won't be able to keep doing this come seventh year."

He smirked as she gawked at the list of ingredients in front of her. "You can't just get these out of the store room?" she asked as she picked up her cauldron and followed him out into the corridor.

"It's not my store room," he answered, walking beside her.

She sighed and jammed the parchment into the pocket of her robes. They continued on to the common room in silence, both heading for the dormitory staircases. Students were milling about, rucksacks packed and ready to bring home for the break.

"Have a happy Christmas, Severus," Isadora said when they had reached the stairwells. Unexpectedly, she wrapped an arm around his neck and hugged him.

"Er…you as well," he replied, slightly shocked by the contact. The last he saw of her was her smirking as she ran upstairs. He sighed and watched a few students exit the common room, disappearing for the holidays. With a final glance at the roaring fire, he made his way down to the empty sixth year dormitory, changed into his pajamas, and crawled into bed.