Chapter Nineteen: Other Half
Waking up as the sunlight poured in through the window across the room, Nick searched the bed for the warmth of his partner's body, finding himself alone under the sheets. He knew that he didn't dream it, because he could see the evidence of last night all across Greg's bedroom floor. Their clothes littered the bedroom floor, which wasn't that noticeable in Greg's room, as it was always covered in clothes, but he could see his own clothes amongst the heap, reminding him of their passionate night.
If that wasn't enough evidence to prove it really happened, Nick was wearing Greg's Stanford t-shirt over his boxers. A token from their past. When they were dating before, Greg would always hand him this t-shirt to sleep in. It was still a little too tight across the chest, but he loved to wear it, reminding him of a time when things between him and his boyfriend were almost perfect.
"Hey, you're awake." Greg crawled onto the bed beside him, setting their coffees on the bedside table. He moved himself against Nick's side, pressing their lips together for a morning kiss. Something they both had missed out on for a while. "Did you sleep okay?" He brushed his fingertips through the man's tousled hair, licking his lips as he looked at the expression on his lover's face. He knew that today was going to be awkward, but he never expected it to be like this. "Talk to me." He pleaded, sweeping his hand through the man's soft hair.
"Yes." Nick gave him a solemn nod, gulping back his emotions. "Better then okay actually. I don't think I've slept that well in a long time." He gave out a sleepy stretch, pulling his partner's body closer against his side. "What times your flight?"
"Ten, so about... four hours." Teasing his fingers beneath the tight t-shirt Nick was wearing; Greg gently caressed his firm muscles, before he brought their mouths together for another kiss. He tasted his Texan's mouth watering scent, entwining their tongues together in their mouths. He felt Nick's hand touch his own, pulling back to watch the man brushing his finger across the ring, as if he was checking that it was still there. "Of course," Greg whispered, lifting Nick's chin to look him in the eye. "I'm still coming back, gorgeous. Everything I said last night is true. I love you."
"I love you too. But I'm not sure I can let you go." He struggled to a sitting position, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "You're the greatest thing that's ever happened to me, and I've had some pretty great stuff. Not includin' the coffin though," He smirked, looking round at Greg. "But I'd go through it all again in a heartbeat, just so I could be with you here today, and for the rest of my life. My life would seriously suck without you."
Greg gave out a soft chuckle, pulling his boyfriend back into his arms. "That's the simplest way you could of said that. But I'm still going."
"I know." Nick forced his eyes to close against Greg's shoulder, breathing in the younger man's familiar scent. He had never really had to say goodbye to anyone before, especially someone he loved. Leaving home back in Texas was easy, because he wanted to other thing, and he knew that he'd always be able to see his son and family whenever he liked. But Greg was leaving, and something told him that it was for good. He didn't think that he could survive without Greg around. He didn't even want to try it, he just wanted to keep him here in his arms, forever. "So... four hours?" He finally asked. "What are we gonna do for the next four hours or so?"
"I can think of a few things." The younger man mischievously grinned, touching his lips to Nick's forehead. "I'm not gonna forget about you, Nicky. I'm going away for six months. I would never forget about you. I'll remember your name, long after I've forgotten mine."
"You're gonna make me cry." The Texan warned him, wiping the back of his hand across his nose. "I know that it's just six months, but when you love someone as much as I love you, anytime apart is torture. Love like this only happens in fairytales or romance novels, but my life isn't a fairytale, and if it is a novel, the writer has one sick and twisted mind. You're here though, and you're like a fairytale come true. I don't wonna let you go."
Greg couldn't help but smile at his adorableness, gently touching his hand to Nick's cheek. "Baby, you don't have to let me go. People take vacations all the time. It might be a little longer than most people, but I need to get away from things here in Vegas."
"You keep explainin' it to me, but I'm too selfish to see past the fact that you're leavin' me." He sniffled this time, breaking Greg's heart. "Don't stay just because I'm a wreck." He looked up at Greg, wiping his hands across his eyes. "I'll never forgive myself if I make you stay."
Greg suddenly felt even more guilty for wanting to leave, wishing he could come up with the perfect words that would suddenly make Nick feel better, assuring him that he would be back for him, but he was too nervous to speak. He had already broken down the strongest man he knew into tears, so he decided to keep his mouth shut, not wanting to do any more damage.
He held Nick in his arms for at least an hour after that, listening to his soft breaths whistling from his nose. He wondered if he had fallen asleep again, but when Nick's hand suddenly reached out for his own, weaving their fingers tightly together, he knew he was still awake.
"Does this make me your fiancé now?" He brushed his fingers through Nick's hair, smiling as the gorgeous man in his arms looked up at him from his shoulder. "I don't always have to say that you're my boyfriend anymore, right?"
"Yeah." Nick agreed, sucking in a breath. "I didn't think that you liked labels though."
"Being the fiancé of Nick Stokes isn't such a bad label." He grinned, brushing his lips across Nick's forehead. "You really are too good to be true, Nicky. Just when I thought you couldn't surprise me anymore, you do this."
"Do what?"
Greg raised his hand, indicating towards the ring on his finger. "I'm surprised you didn't show up with chocolate covered strawberries and champagne."
"Did you want em, 'cause I could go..."
"No, don't go." Greg giggled, pinning Nick to the bed beneath him. "This is perfect." He brought their mouths together, teasing his tongue across the older man's lips, inviting him to deepen the kiss. Just as he used to do, Nick kept the pace of their kissing slow and gentle; a deliberate action to slowly build the level of excitement between them.
With a soft moan, the older man rolled their bodies, keeping his lips locked with Greg's. He slid his hands beneath Greg's t-shirt, feeling his velvety soft skin beneath his fingertips. He kissed the corner of the younger man's mouth, tracing the cute little clusters of moles with his tongue, towards his collar bone against the rim of his t-shirt.
"You wonna shower with me?" Nick suggested, gently nipping at Greg's lips.
"I don't have any condoms left. Those two I found under the bed last night were just lucky."
"I said shower... not sex." Nick chuckled, slipping his hands around Greg's waist. "I don't think I could after last night anyway. I'm spent."
"My cowboy's been pent up for a year and he can only last a night of it?" He teased him, playfully grinding his hips against Nick's. "What happened to my stud?"
"He became a fulltime father of three."
Greg giggled softly, before he crawled towards the edge of the bed, pulling Nick along behind him. Nick stumbled as he was pulled out of bed so quickly, tripping over his clothes from yesterday, being steadied by the younger man in front of him. "Careful babe, I don't wonna end up in the emergency room with you. It's not exactly my idea of fun as the first day as your fiancé. Do you want me to get you a ring?" He suddenly asked, looking at the ring on his own finger. "Is that the romantic thing to do? You know I'm not very good with all this stuff..."
"No, you don't have to." Nick shook his head, backing Greg up into the bathroom. "Not that you're the chick or anythin' like that, but since I proposed to you, you don't have to get me a ring. Unless you really want to, but I won't mind if you don't."
Greg gave him a smile, touching their lips together for a quick kiss. "You've gotta be the most adorable person on the face of the earth, Nicky. I'm gonna get you a ring. You're gonna need one to keep all the ladies away from you while I'm away. I don't wonna come back and find them all fawning over you. You know that they can smell a single guy from a mile away."
"In case you hadn't noticed," He pulled Greg's body against him, holding his hips against his own. "I lean more in the direction of guys. You to be exact. I'm really happy with you, why would I wonna shop around for somebody else?"
"You still need a ring." He took a step away from him, getting the shower ready. While Greg adjusted the temperature of the shower water, Nick stripped himself of his shorts and t-shirt, before he did the same to his partner. He affectionately pressed his lips to the soft patch of skin behind Greg's ear, feeling his heart skipping a beat as Greg's long lashes fluttered across his eyes.
"God I've missed you so much." He gave the younger man a gentle push into the shower, slowly joining him under the warm spray.
Touching their lips together for a slow kiss, Nick watched the water droplets gently rolling down the sides of the younger man's face, highlighting his most adorable features. He pulled his partner's warm body closer against him, smiling as he watched the water droplets coating Greg's beautiful long lashes.
"What?" Greg circled his arms around his lover's tanned waist, giving him a curious look.
"Nothin' . . . you're just so beautiful." He swept his fingers through Greg's wet hair, pushing it back into cute spikes. "I don't know what I'd do without you, baby. But I know that you're always gonna be mine."
"Don't cry, Nicky. You think I wonna remember the last time I saw you as the day I made you cry?" He brushed his fingertips across Nick's cheeks, easily recognising the man's tears through the shower water, from the puffiness around his eyes.
"How do you know it's not happy tears?"
Swirling his hands across the older man's chest, Greg whispered, "Your eyes don't go puffy when you have happy tears." He reached for the soap from behind him, rubbing it together between his hands, before he started to massage it into his partner's body, soaping up his silky smooth skin. "You still really wonna marry me?"
"I do. For better or worse, you're stuck with me." He brushed his hands across Greg's shoulders. "I always feel like myself around you. Last night . . . was amazin'." Nick lifted his gaze to meet Greg's. "You are amazin'."
"I'm coming back." Greg touched his palms to Nick's hips, sensing he still needed some reassurance. "I'm gonna marry you. Of course I'm coming back. As soon as I get back, we can start making plans for our future. Like our wedding, where we're gonna live, what we're gonna tell your kids..."
"I think they already know that I'm in love with you." Nick stopped him there. "And I want them to know. You're gonna be a huge part of their lives too. I never realised it before, because I was too wrapped up in my own stuff. But you're my other half."
"Huh?" Greg stopped what he was doing, giving him a confused look.
"You've never heard that before? You know when married couples say 'their other half', referring to their husband or wife. Well I finally understand what it means, because you're mine. Before I found you, I always felt like somethin' was missin' . . . but when I found you, I still didn't realise what it was. It wasn't until I lost you, that I realised that you were what I was missin'. These past few months without you, I haven't been feelin' whole, like myself. And I realised that it's because I'm not whole . . . not without you. You're my other half . . . you complete me, Greg."
Greg couldn't help but smile, smirking, "No one has ever used so many words to say that they loved me before."
"I more than love you. You're a part of me."
Greg giggled softly; feeling even more excited to marry his sentimental cowboy. "So eh... what kinda wedding do you want?"
"I haven't decided yet. Of course, we'll have to decide that together too. We can choose to write our own vows or just say the usual religious stuff."
"What kinda wedding did you have with Miranda?" The younger man queried, smoothing his soapy hands across Nick's broad shoulders. "You can tell me. I'm not gonna get all jealous or anything. I know you have a past."
"Well... it was a small church... her family on one side, mine on the other. She wore this plain white dress, I think it was her mother's and I wore a rented tux. We had the after party thing at her parents' house, which was kinda awkward, since her parents never really liked me. I don't want ours like that though."
"What did you have in mind for us?" He opened his palm to Nick, allowing the man to take the soap off his hands. "C'mon, tell me your dream wedding for us. I don't care how cheesy it sounds. I never really thought I'd ever get married, so I've never given it much thought."
"That changes now." Nick gave him a smile, before returning the same treatment to the younger man's body, with the soap in his hands. "Our weddin'... I just want it to be you and me. I don't care about the cost or who we invite; all that's important is that you're at my side." He smoothed his soapy hands across Greg's delicate skin, bringing their mouths together for a ravenous kiss. Greg slowly began to melt in his arms, feeling his body temperature slowing rising from the heat of his kisses.
The Texan's lips slowly trailed down the exposed nape of the younger man's neck, nipping and sucking at his soft skin. He swiped his tongue across his jaw, feeling the soft bristles of hair against the surface of his tongue. Greg usually had an impeccably smooth chin, but he noticed that he hadn't shaved today. The hair was much darker than the hair on his head, but he didn't find it off putting, he actually thought that it made Greg even sexier.
"You know, I've always thought that you should grow out your beard." He held Greg's chin in his hand, pressing his lips to the short stubble. "I'm not talkin' really long here. Somewhere along the lines of Justin Timberlake or Johnny Depp. The short clean shaven look."
Greg immediately giggled, shaking his head at Nick. "After all these years of knowing me, you finally decide to tell me that you like guys with beards?"
"Sort of. I guess I've always kinda liked guys with a little stubble." Nick shrugged, brushing his thumb across the dark stubble on the younger man's chin. "When I started growin' stubble in my teens, I never wanted to shave it. But I was one of those unlucky kids that got a patch here and a patch here, makin' me look really scruffy. I hated it after that. Always havin' to shave every mornin' so I didn't look like a hobo... as my mother described it, but the one thing I hated on me was the one thing that I was most attracted to in other guys."
"You never tell me stuff like that." Greg wrapped his arms around the man's shoulders, looking into his big beautiful eyes. "I've been wanting you to open up to me like this for years."
"I've been wantin' to tell somebody for years." Nick admitted, placing his hands on Greg's back. "I never thought that I could trust anybody before you, but I've been keepin' secrets to myself for so long, that its harder than I thought to just... come out with it all."
"So, start out slow." He suggested, entwining his fingers through Nick's wet hair. "I can wait."
"You wonna know why it took me so long to come out to my parents?" He leant back against the shower wall behind him, allowing the water droplets to roll down his chest for a few more seconds, before he tried to speak, "I never thought that I was really that gay when I was younger, because all the gay guys on TV were scripted as weak wimps with high pitched voices. My father used to say that they were less than men, like they didn't deserve to live, so I never thought of myself as gay... even though I kinda liked guys. I wanted to be what my father saw as a real man, the macho stereotype, so I never came out to him when I should have. Maybe if I was still a kid when I told him, he'd have been more understandin'."
Greg shook his head, "I think he'd have done more damage to you then. A child is easier to break then an adult. From how he reacted when you told him, if you were still just a kid, he'd have probably tried to convince you that you were wrong or something."
"I guess that's why I didn't tell him then. I thought about the conversation thousands of times, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. It took me a while to realise that real men are just men. A man who beats his wife isn't any more of a man then me, neither is a sick son of bitch like Gary. I've been tryin' to be this idealistic real man my whole life, that I don't even know who I am anymore." He tasted the water droplets from Greg's Adams apple, resting his head against the younger man's shoulder. "Except with you. I always feel like myself around you. You don't make me feel inferior to you, you don't criticise how I am, and you love me. I've never had that before."
As Nick lifted his head from his shoulder, Greg brushed his lips across Nick's, looking at the sparkle slowly returning to his former lover's eyes. He raised his hand to tenderly cup Nick's cheek, whispering, "I love you, exactly how you are. I always want you to be yourself around me, because that's who I love. And I'm never gonna let you go again." He pulled him into a slow passionate kiss, seeing something he had never seen in Nick's arms.
Combined with the look of a scared little boy wanting someone to love him for who he was, Nick was bearing his soul out to the man he loved, putting all of his trust in him.
"And I don't wonna ruin what you said earlier, but that other half thing," Greg moved his other hand to cup his cheek, feeling their hearts pounding together as one, from Nick's close proximity. "It's true, because I feel it too. I'm only half a person without you. You can tell me anything, anytime. Nothing you could ever say would change the way I feel about you."
"I can't wait to marry you." Nick gave out his widest smile yet; glad his emotions were finally under control. He wrapped his arms tightly around Greg, pulling him directly under the spray of the shower. "You can take as long as you need, Greg. I'll wait. I don't care how long it takes, just as long as you marry me."
"I will. I promise." He touched his lips to his fiancé's. "I love you. Now can we get out of this shower? I'm getting cold."
"Yes." Nick smiled back at him, turning off the water behind him. He grabbed for the towel outside of the shower, wrapping it around Greg's shoulders. "Can I treat you to breakfast before you leave? I don't think I should see you off at the airport, I'll probably embarrass you by breakin' down into tears or somethin'." He gently ruffled the towel through Greg's wet hair, rolling his eyes at himself, as he was starting to get emotional again. "Let's get dressed and go out, you still got time, right?"
The younger man nodded, grabbing a second towel to wrap around his partner's waist. "What about your kids, won't they start to wonder where you are?"
"Samantha can handle them for now. If I know kids, they'll be sleepin' for the next few hours, so I'll have time to grocery shop and bring them back some breakfast." Nick assured him, pressing his lips to Greg's forehead. "I'm not gonna lie to them if they ask though. No more secrets from my kids, unless it's for their own protection." He winked at him.
When Samantha awoke, it took her a while before she realised that she was in Nick's room. It was pretty obvious from the choice of wallpaper, but it made her feel safer then waking up in her room back home. Lifting her head from the pillow, she looked round at the time, before she kicked back the covers, climbing out of bed. She gave her hair a quick brush with her fingers, before she stepped out into the hall, looking for any signs of life. Apart from baby Willa's soft whimpers, the house was pretty quiet.
"It's alright, shh baby girl." Samantha made her way over to the travel cot, lifting her into her arms. Willa stopped her whimpering as soon as she was in her arms, taking a curious look around the room, with her fingers in her mouth. "Where's that Daddy of yours, aye?" She adjusted her against her hip, checking there weren't any messages on the machine. She thought she would be worried if there wasn't, but to her, it meant that Nick actually went to see Greg. "Let's getcha some breakfast." She looked towards the little girl in her arms, carrying her through to the kitchen.
She searched all the cupboards and things, wondering what this little girl even ate. She realised that she couldn't call Nick, as he had left his phone on the side. She soon found some formula mix in one of the cupboards, reading the directions on the back, before she looked in the fridge.
She soon noticed that Nick was still just as organised as ever, keeping everything in its place.
On the top shelf, she found small containers with puréed vegetables inside, labelled by the date that they were made. Samantha smiled to herself, selecting one of the small containers, as Willa was starting to get fidgety, wanting something in her tummy.
"Alright, baby girl." She cooed her, gently setting her into the highchair beside the table. She strapped her in, before she searched for a spoon, finding a whole cupboard full of baby things for Willa. "I'll have to give it to your Daddy; he's certainly an organised father." She smirked, pulling up a chair in front of the whimpering baby.
As Willa took her first mouthful, the door behind them suddenly opened. Samantha looked round the counter, smiling as Nick stepped through the door with groceries in his arms. "Hey." He smiled in her direction, setting the groceries on the side. He pressed his lips to Willa's forehead, brushing down her blonde streaks of hair with his fingertips. "Anybody else up?"
"Nope, what are you doin' back so early?" She checked the time behind her. "Did you even go and see him?"
"Yes." He smiled at her, unpacking his groceries. "We spent the whole night together. He didn't want me to go to the airport with him, in case I made him cry again." He smirked, taking a seat beside Samantha at the table. "I proposed to him."
"You did?" She looked round at him surprised, before she grabbed his hand, seeing the missing ring from his hand. "You didn't? Oh my god, what did he say? He's still goin' though right?"
"He said yes, and yes he is. He'll be back in six months." He clasped his hands together in his lap. "I feel like an excited teenager again. I can't wait until he comes back."
Samantha giggled softly, handing the baby food over to him. "You look like an excited teenager again. So, he didn't give you an exact date or anythin'? Where's he even goin'?"
"I don't know." Nick shrugged, realising he had forgotten to ask. He felt the warm glow starting to leave his body, as he realised just how long it would be before he saw Greg again. "I got some stuff for pancakes or there's some bacon, eggs, waffles..."
"Don't change the subject." She cut him off, watching him feeding Willa another mouthful, before she asked, "Are you gonna be okay? Six months doesn't seem that long, but to be separated from the man you adore, it's pretty long."
"I think I can make it." He smiled at her. "Besides, we're gonna talk on the phone all the time. He already called me twice in the car. He was runnin' his checklist by me, makin' sure he hadn't forgotten anythin'. He should be drivin' over to his parents now. He's catching his flight in LA... to wherever he's goin' next."
"I can't believe you didn't ask. In the movies, the guy always runs around last minute to find out where their loved one went, for the dramatic endin' at the airport where they sweep them off their feet..."
"I'm not gonna sweep Greg off his feet." He stopped her there. "He needs to go away for a little while, so I'm gonna let him. He'll be back when he's ready, and I'm gonna marry him when he does come back... on his own." He quickly warned her, climbing to his feet to make the kids some breakfast. "So, did you want anythin'?"
"Sure." Samantha nodded, curiously watching him for a moment. She couldn't believe how strong he was being, when his lover was driving out of the city as they spoke, going away for six whole months. She didn't think that Nick could cope for that long away from him; she knew that she couldn't cope for that long without her son, and they had been joined at the hip since he was born.
Once breakfast was made, Nick set it down at the table, making his way towards the kids' rooms down the hall to wake them up. He lifted Tayla from her bed, holding her securely against his chest, as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. Ever since he had fallen in love with Greg, he had always dreamed of raising a family with the younger man, feeling as though he was the missing link in his life. He couldn't wait for him to come back, but he knew that it was going to be hard to be away from him for so long.
But Greg was right. The children came first. Above everything.
Even his own happiness.
I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thanks for reading, let me know what you thought of it!
I hope you had a wonderful Christmas. Enjoy the rest of your Holidays!
~ Holly