🎭 wear your heart where i can see 🎭
a dbsk fanfic about falling in love on a trial run
chapter 4
Jaejoong enters the lunch room the next day a little later and a little more annoyed than he normally does. His geometry teacher held him back after class to talk about his performance on the last quiz. It wasn't the best, admittedly, but he didn't need the reminder. Right now, the only triangular shapes he cares about are pizza slices.
A roar of noise erupts from one of the tables near the food pick-up, and he recognises the students to be the hapkido team as he gets in line. He wants to find their antics obnoxious but cannot. If High School Musical taught him anything, it's that sports teams and drama clubs aren't as diametrically opposed as they think they are.
As the line progresses, Jaejoong idly thinks about what a theoretical 'Stick to the Status Quo' musical number would look like in their school cafeteria, then he recognises Yunho in the middle of the excitement. One of the team members is giving him a noogie, and he's close enough (and they're loud enough) that he can pick out the accompanying jibes.
"When do we get to meet her?" "It must be pretty serious if the Jungster himself is telling us!" "Has she figured out yet that you're a fucking nerd?"
Jaejoong turns his back on the scene with a warm yet wry smile playing on his face. He's always had the impression of Yunho being a diligent student, so it shouldn't surprise him that spirit applies even in this.
When he has his lunch in hand, he looks over at the hapkido table one more time. They've settled down while he was ordering, which gives Yunho the opportunity to see Jaejoong above the heads of his friends. He offers a happy little wave, and Jaejoong responds with a nod. Yunho gives him one last smile before returning his attention back to his friends, then Jaejoong notices there's actually space for one or two more people at their table. Something he is choosing to call an intrusive thought tells him to take the spot next to Yunho, but he resolutely shakes it off.
A wave out of the corner of his eye gets his attention, and he finds the table where Sooyoung and some other drama club kids are sitting. When he gets closer, she shifts to make a spot for him and doesn't even let him take a bite of his pizza before pouncing. "So what did Jung Yunho want with you yesterday?"
Jaejoong blinks at her. He can't believe he never told her about his newest extracurricular activity, especially considering she was basically the inspiration behind it all. Where would he even begin?
He looks into her expectant eyes, opens his mouth, and says the words, "He was lending me his geometry notes. I totally bombed the last quiz."
Sooyoung makes a sympathetic noise. "I'm sorry. Here, have my brownie." She drops the dessert on his plate and lets him eat in peace, but now Jaejoong isn't quite hungry.
He tells himself that it's because they aren't alone that he's hesitant to launch into a dramatic retelling of his past few weeks, but he knows himself enough to know it's just a convenient excuse. He just doesn't really want to find out the real reason yet either, though.
"By the way, what can you tell me about Kwon Boa?" he asks to distract himself.
Sooyoung sends him a weird look over her drink. "Probably nothing that you don't already know. She's the one who kicked our butts during rehearsal last night, does that ring a bell?"
"Humour me."
"Hardass, gorgeous, smart, flexible, unattainable, gorgeous…" she lists.
"Yeah, but you were on the dance team with her last year. Can't you tell me anything more specific?"
Sooyoung narrows her eyes at him, trying to determine the purpose of his line of questioning, but then she tilts her head as she thinks about how to respond. This is what Jaejoong loves about her. She'll judge him and take him seriously in the same instance.
He's halfway done with his lunch when she speaks up again. "Boa has this reputation for being an ice queen, but she really just has high standards. She's pretty normal when she's not in work mode, actually. People also think she's a stick in the mud, but I never thought that was fair. She's just not the life-of-the-party type of person. Like, she has a great sense of humour but can't make the joke herself, you know? … Honestly, she isn't really your type, boobs and vag notwithstanding," Sooyoung ends jokingly.
Jaejoong elbows her in good nature, but inside he's agonising.
She may not be his type, but he could totally see why she would be Yunho's.
After school, he's doing homework in his room wondering if maybe he really should ask Yunho for his geometry notes when the boy himself texts him.
I'll have you know that the hapkido team has been made aware of new variables to my after school availability
Jaejoong makes a face. please don't say it liek that to your real girlfriend, she's gonna hate it
The reply is quick. Last time I checked, that's you, is it not? Concepts in practise, and all
do not cite the textbook to me, student! i was there when it was written
and yes exactly since i am your rEaL gIrLfRiEnD, i'm telling you to quit it
wait
What?
what am i saved as in your phone?
Yunho's next message is a screenshot of a contact page. The text at the top, right above Jaejoong's phone number, reads 'Prince Charming'.
Jaejoong's fingers move before he tells them to. YAH!
Is something the matter?
Technically? No. Jaejoong had asked because he was going to encourage Yunho to save him under a nickname anyway. If Yunho's little sister is anything like Jaejoong's older one, then their conversations are liable to be perused at any moment for the sake of her entertainment. As he suspected, Yunho wanted to keep their practise-dating-slash-tutoring thing a secret; and 'Prince Charming' hides enough.
Another text comes in. You said you liked the nickname
But that's the real problem, isn't it? He does like the nickname; he likes that Yunho made that his contact name—as opposed to his initials or a fake name or something else—without any prompting on Jaejoong's part at all.
He likes it a little too much.
i need a cooler one for subterfuge purposes, you understand, he eventually fires off.
Again, the reply is quick. Shouldn't I get a secret agent nickname too then? I bet my name in your phone is just Jung Yunho
Jaejoong burns with indignation. How dare that punk be right.
He looks around his room desperately, trying to find inspiration for something quick and clever he could change Yunho's contact name to. Unseen pressure forces him to choose quick over clever, so he groans and settles for something basic.
excuse you, i am committed to this relationship
The attached photo shows a screenshot of Yunho's own contact page entitled 'Hot Stuff 🔥'. Unfortunately, that really was the best Jaejoong got.
When more than a minute passes without hearing from the other, Jaejoong's mind helpfully supplies he actually has homework he needs to do. He turns his phone face down on his desk with a sigh and looks back at the worksheet he's supposed to be filling out, but then he remembers why he stopped so easily in the first place. He has no clue how to solve this problem.
He figures it's time to actually ask for some real help, but Yunho's incoming text distracts him again.
That's very flattering, thank you. You're rather cute yourself ❤
Jaejoong stares at the characters on his screen like they may change from Korean into something else at any moment. That is a suspiciously flirty response coming from Yunho.
oh yeah? what's cute about me~
He pays rapt attention to the dots at the bottom of the screen that portend an incoming message. It's not that he has expectations or hopes for what the response will be, but he's intrigued by what it will reveal.
Your food is delicious
Jaejoong barks out a laugh into his empty room, more relieved than disappointed. Of course. Yunho couldn't be flirting with him; he doesn't know how!
why am i not surprised that's your answer ;p
give me another. i want one about ME
Jaejoong leans back in his seat, waiting for the comedy to be delivered right to his fingertips.
Your voice is cute
He nearly falls backwards, and Yunho isn't done.
Cute may be a strong word, but I like your voice a lot. It's very unique. I can pick it out in a noisy room
I also like the way you talk, like everything is a joke just waiting to find the right audience
I think you're funny too, but I'm not sure this one counts because everyone thinks you're funny
Jaejoong almost cracks his phone from the frantic way he's handling it as message after message rolls in. Where is this all coming from? Why does Jung Yunho know so many words?
Finally, there is a lull in notifications, and Jaejoong tentatively takes a peek at the most recent message in their chat log.
And of course, you're cutest when you're next to me
His heart beats a dangerous rhythm against his chest when he reads those words. A cursory glance at the rest of the chat reveals a string of compliments that become more and more cheesy as he scrolls through, and he cannot handle any of that right now—not what they say, not what they mean.
yAH CAN YOU READ?! i said one (1)! he sends in an embarrassingly hopeful stupor before desperately scrolling back up again. What did Yunho say? What did Yunho mean?
The reply comes in as a bubble at the top of the screen. Ah, right… Extra credit then? ;)
Jaejoong will not admit it to himself until his subconscious does it for him later at night, but that winky face, in all of its unassuming and unexpected glory, is probably what seals his fate.
The text messages are still on his mind in the minutes between English and Literature the next day, which makes Yunho's sudden appearance by his side a welcome yet disconcerting surprise.
"Woah, hey! Jumpy today. Everything okay?"
Uncharacteristic awkwardness overcomes Jaejoong in the face of Yunho's concern. "Yes?"—No, he should sound more confident.—"I mean, yeah! Yeah, I would say so. You don't have to worry about me."—No! That's such a weird thing to say, what the hell.—"I mean, um."
He needs to get over this.
"What's up?" he finishes lamely.
Yunho only blinks at him, and yeah, Jaejoong deserves that. He forces himself to find a grip and get it. "I have Literature next. What about you?"
Not the best recovery, but at least Yunho stops looking at him like he should take Jaejoong to the nurse. "What classroom is that in?"
"206, why?"
Yunho looks around furtively, which is a silly enough action that the need to make fun of Yunho makes Jaejoong come back to himself. They're in a high school; there's no such thing as privacy.
Yunho seems to realise the same thing. "Come with me." He grabs hold of Jaejoong's hand to pull him in the opposite direction they're walking, and Jaejoong's feet follow him in surprise before putting up a feeble fight. "What are you doing? We have class!"
Yunho continues to pull him through the hall and down some stairs. "I don't have a quiz or anything. Do you?" He looks over his shoulder with mischief in his eyes, and Jaejoong feels awkward again. He only shakes his head.
They're not running in slow motion through empty halls like in the movies, but they may as well have been in Jaejoong's mind. Is this really Yunho—studious, learn-the-theory, can-homework-be-part-of-a-date Jung Yunho—who's making them skip class so they could be alone together?
He was stupid to think that he could put up a fight against whatever Yunho's planning, not like this. He wants to see where this will go, late Joseon poetry be damned.
Yunho takes them all the way outside, and Jaejoong's feet trip over nothing. The only thing out here on this side of campus worth visiting is the Backstreet. Yunho knows what the Backstreet is for, right?
To Jaejoong's surprise and anticipation, it's empty.
Yunho walks them to the alley entrance, not much deeper than they were the first time, and leans against one wall, hands in his pockets and legs stretched out to almost reach the other side with his toes. Jaejoong mirrors the pose on the opposite wall and tries to calm down. He is thrumming with the energy it takes to contain his expectations, but he doesn't know what this all means yet.
He knows what he wants this to mean, though.
Yunho leans forward and leers. "So, how did I do?"
Jaejoong doesn't know what he's referring to, but that isn't enough to stop a stupid answer to a stupid question. "You were very good at leading us all the way here," he says with a faux-serious nod.
"No!" Yunho laughs. "I meant last night."
Jaejoong straightens his posture in interest. Yunho wants to talk about last night? The hope he has been refusing to acknowledge blazes anew in his chest. The memory of Yunho's sweet, promising words; the auspicious location for playing hooky; the way Yunho is looking at him with eager eyes—he can feel a blush blooming on his cheeks, but he doesn't bother trying to hide it. What use would that do? He's the cutest when he's besides Yunho, after all.
Yunho's grin widens, gets a little toothy. "Yeah? I passed?"
"Passed?" Jaejoong repeats with a confused smile, still trying to figure out if he's going to have his first kiss with a boy today. Not just any boy. Jung Yunho.
Jung Yunho, who pulls his hands out and gestures excitedly. "Yeah, the flirty texts? The 'concepts in practise'?" He makes lazy air quotes with his fingers. "How did I do?"
Jaejoong's heart drops with no bungee cord to pull it back up to where it belongs.
With painful clarity, he reimagines last night in the context of what Yunho must have been thinking the whole time: it was one of their lessons. A test. He brought up extra credit, for fuck's sake, and Jaejoong still didn't get it.
He collects himself enough to remember he owes Yunho an answer. "Fine."
"'Fine'?!"
Jaejoong nods, face turned out of the alley. "You did fine."
"What! I thought I was being really sweet while maintaining a subtle, yet undeniable, flirtatious undertone!"
He was, but Jaejoong can't feel good about being on the receiving end of it anymore. He thought Yunho really meant those things, but he was stupid. Why would he humour Jaejoong so much if it weren't part of his endgame? It hasn't even been two days since he learned Yunho is doing all of this for Kwon Boa. Yunho wouldn't change his mind in two days.
"Is it because I didn't initiate?" Yunho wonders out loud.
It's his fault. Jaejoong is the one who changed his mind in two days. "Sure."
"Dangit, I knew you were gonna dock me points for that. Listen, I've been thinking about it. At this point in the relationship, isn't it fair for me to expect some pursuing in return? All the stuff you told me about my girlfriend wanting to feel wanted and whatever, doesn't that get to apply to me, too?"
Jaejoong pushes himself off the wall. He needs to get out of here. "You know what? You're right. Your girlfriend should ask you out."
Yunho perks up and follows Jaejoong out of the Backstreet. "Really?"
"Really." Jaejoong doesn't even bother to turn his head so that his voice can be heard better, focused as he was on the nearest school entrance. "Wait to hear from her."
He makes it inside a few paces before Yunho does, then he books it for the nearest staircase. He spares half a mind to hope that Yunho thinks he's preoccupied with making it back to class, but he's not going to class.
On the second floor, he beelines for the bathroom and locks himself in a stall. He gets up on the toilet and squats and curls inward on himself just in time for the first tears to fall.
He was so, so stupid.
A/N (4.16.2023): Past midnight where I am, but it's still Saturday somewhere in America! This chapter was pretty short and perhaps weirdly paced, but the next one will make up for it! Also, I made slight edits to chapters 1-3 to help set up for later in the story. I normally only publish my works after the whole whole thing is already written for this very reason, but I was trying something new with this story. I'm gonna go back to my old method for my next work, but this was still a good learning experience. :)