Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or any of its characters. SM does.

Previously: Suddenly there was a knock on the door. It was a familiar scent, but we all wondered why they were here. The thoughts that filled my family's minds were not good, they were all panicked.

Chapter 7:

Renee's POV:

I knew that giving up Bella was the right thing to do, but I missed my baby. But wouldn't it be wrong if I go get her back, especially now, after it seems that the Cullen's have connected with Bella so well already. My heart tells me that I would be wrong, and probably break that family. But my head tells me that she is my baby, and giving her up was out of fear; and now Charlie is on his way to jail, there is nothing to fear anymore.

There was one good thing that came out of this, Dr. Cullen convinced me to get the help I desperately needed, but was too scared to do anything on my own.

Currently I was a hotel in Seattle; I knew I had to get away from Forks so I wouldn't be tempted to go get my baby back, but obviously that was not working. I knew the Cullen's could give her a lot more than I could ever imagine, but she was, after all, my baby. I may not have a ton, but I can give her my endless love.

I decided to distract my mind with something else, I have already tried reading, but that let my wander. So, instead, I turned on the TV. I was aimlessly flipping through channels, when I stopped on a news station when I saw a familiar face.

It was Charlie' mug shot, which must mean he is off to jail, the news anchor was telling what he did, but she changed mine and Bella's name. I knew I wanted it that way, but if anyone knew him, they would know my name what not "Tara" and Bella's name was not "Cassidy".

I was worried that I would be targeted by Charlie's buddies. They would probably figure out that I was the one that put him in jail, and took away their leader. Maybe I should change my name and hide, but I couldn't, not without my baby, anyways.

It was decided, I was going to get my baby back. I knew that Esme and Dr. Cullen were reasonable people, and if I asked for my Bella back and told them the circumstances, I am sure they will understand and give me back my little girl.

I knew I had to be completely decided and determined about this mission, or I would turn back half way. So I decided to take a walk and figure out how this was going to go out.

(A couple of hours later)

I was in a cab, heading back to Forks, preparing myself for what I was about to do.

"We are here, Ma'am. That will be $60," the cab driver said. I raised my eyebrows in disbelief at the price.

"I was a long drive; you had me drive you from Seattle to Forks. If you make a big deal out of it, I could raise the price," he said in an annoyed voice.

I quickly shook my head, "that won't be necessary." I dug through my pockets, and barely found 60 dollars; I realized that I didn't have any money left. I would have to stay in Forks till I could get enough money to leave again.

After I unwilling handed the money to the rude cab driver that I just spend an hour and an half in a car with. I hurried out of the car and walked up to the Cullen's front door. I heard the cab speed away with the only money I had. I took a deep breath, I can do this, I thought to myself.

I gently knocked on the door, and waited with baited breath for them to answer the door.

Dr. Cullen opened the door, "Renee?" he asked, "what are you doing? Charlie's in jail, do you need help with anything else?"

I quickly shook my head; it felt like I was frozen in that moment. As if no matter what I did I couldn't move or talk. As I looked past Carlisle and saw his whole family in the living room with my Bella in their arms. She seemed so happy and content. No Renee you can do this, she is, after all, you baby. I took a deep breath and shakily replied, "I made a mistake."

Dr. Cullen gave me a confused look and looked back towards his family, and then he turned back to me and said, "Do you want to go to my office and talk privately?" It probably would be better to ask for Bella back with only one pair of eyes staring at me. I nodded, and followed Dr. Cullen as he walked up some stairs and into a room, which I presumed to be his office. He let me walk in front of him so he could close the door.

He slowly turned around to face me; it was as if he knew what I was about to say, and he was trying to slow down the inevitable.

He sighed and then asked, "Before you said that you made a mistake. What mistake was that?"

I didn't know how I would say it, so I just let it all come out at once in a garbled mess, "I knew that I said that giving Bella up was the right thing to do, but I miss her so much. I need her back, I am sorry; I know your family has probably already connected to her. I don't know how many times I can say sorry for the inconvenience. "

I couldn't look him in the eye, so instead I decided to look at my shoes. There was a very long pause before I heard Carlisle sit down behind his desk. "Renee I know you probably are feeling that you can support Bella now, since Charlie is out of your life. But really think about it Renee, what stable income do you have. Can you really support Bella?" he asked in a sad tone.

I thought about what Dr. Cullen has just said, did I really think this through. And the adoption papers were already signed, and Bella was officially a Cullen, not a Swan. It would be wrong if I took Bella out of their lives, especially after they have probably grown to love her like she really is there child.

Tears started to fill my eyes; I knew I couldn't take away Bella from this loving family. "I'm so sorry Dr. Cullen; I should never have come and asked for Bella back. You're right; I can't support her and give her everything you and your family can." I was suddenly mortified that I even came here and thought that this was going to be easy and the right thing to do.

Dr. Cullen reached across the table and reassuring touched my hand. "Renee, I understand why you came here. Giving birth makes a connection between the mother and the baby. Giving up a baby is expected to be hard; it is totally alright for you to have these feelings. But you are right about one thing, my family and I have made a connection to Bella, and I don't think we would be able to give her up. I'm sorry."

I knew he was probably right, could I really expect this family to give up a baby. That was probably one of the most selfish things I could have done.

"I know I have been a bother, but can I see Bella one time before I go. And then you guys will never see me again. And I know that is what is said at the hospital, but this time I think I can let go of her." I asked pleadingly.

"Of course, Renee; I will go get Bella for you," Dr. Cullen said softly. I know that this was the second time I was giving myself this pep talk, but in my defense I was still scared that Charlie was going to come find me and hurt me again. But he couldn't hurt me anymore.

A knock on the door jolted me out of my inner monologue. Dr. and Mrs. Cullen walked in with Bella in their arms. She looked so happy and content in Mrs. Cullen's grasp. She had a glow about her, which she didn't have when she was in my arms. Just looking at them, confirmed that I should not take this joy out of their lives.

The tension in this room could be cut with a knife. Sadness filled Mrs. Cullen's eyes, and I felt really bad for even coming on this crazy mission. She very gingerly handed me beautiful baby Bella.

"We will be outside when you are done," Dr. Cullen said, trying to be professional. They gave me one last look before they stepped out of the room and closed the door.

I looked at my baby; no she was not my baby anymore. She was so beautiful, but she deserved better than I could ever give her. I kissed Bella softly on the forehead. This would be the second time I have given her up, and it would not be any easier.

I wiped any evidence of tears from my face and put on a determined face, then got up and was ready to face the inevitable.

As I opened the door, I was met by 2 sets of eyes. I gave my baby's new parents a soft smile and handed Bella over to them.

"Thank you Renee," Mrs. Cullen said gently.

"My wife and I were talking, and, with your consent, would love to have an open adoption. And you can come see her," Dr. Cullen said.

I thought about their proposition, but then replied, "I would love that, but I don't know if I can be around her, and not have the same thoughts that brought me here. It's better if I just go. But thank you anyway."

I gave them one last look and walked out of their house, and never looked back.

Hope you like it...please tell me what you think...if anyone has any ideas for upcoming chapters, i would love to hear them...

love always...
orangegirlie