Spencer sat in the depressingly beige room for what seemed like hours as Dr. Shepard personally escorted Briana through all the X-rays and blood tests.

Jerk.

"So," Dr. Shepard started while he pushed Briana's wheelchair down another hallway, "How exactly did you twist your ankle?"

"I was…jumped, I guess." She answered, not exactly sure on how to describe what happened the previous night.

"Where was your boyfriend?" The doctor asked, a particular disdain in his voice. Creep. Normally, she would inform the man that Spence was not, in fact, her boyfriend. However, Shepard was weirding her out and she didn't want to give him any reason to think she wanted anything to with him. So she decided to let it be.

"We got into a minor tiff," She spat, "I walked off. When I screamed, he came running. The men are in prison and my boyfriend is waiting for me back in the room."

The doctor said nothing more as he walked them both into an elevator.

Briana's grip on the chair tightened.

Spencer was tinkering with the sliver lid of the cotton ball jar when the phone in his pants pocket vibrated. In a fit of shock, he dropped the lid back onto the jar clumsily. This, in turn, knocked the jar off of balance and the counter.

"Oh, just classic." Spencer angrily hissed as he lowered himself to the floor and scooped up the puffy white orbs.

A short way down the hall, the elevator rang and the doors opened. The sounds of a rather loud Dr. Shepard trying to "woo" Briana Parker echoed into the room.

Spencer cursed swiftly as he hurriedly swept the cotton balls back into the jar and stumbled to replace it back upon the counter.

Just as he fell back into his seat, the mechanical clicking of a turning door knob was heard.

"-just lovely," Briana was saying as she was wheeled in, "but Spencer and I have plans that weekend."

"Oh, really?" The doctor responded in annoyed disbelief, "Well, that's just too bad."

"Yes it is, good doctor," Spencer addressed, standing from his seat and walking over to the odd couple, "Now, considering the obviously painful small talk you've decided to succumb Miss Parker to, I'd assume that she is in no mortal danger here?"

Dr. Shepard sent a glare the young man's way and answered with a snide 'no'.

Spencer smirked. "Then I suggest you scribble out your little prescriptions and let us on our way."

Briana smiled as the doctor walked away from her chair and to the little prescription pad on the end of the counter.

'Thank you.' She mouthed towards her company. He smiled and nodded.

Dr. Shepard returned to Briana, stepping in her and Spencer (on purpose, it seemed) and kneeling down to her seated level. He had three slips of paper in his hand.

"This one," He said, picking a single piece of paper from the herd, "Is for painkillers. Take two an hour as needed. This one is for anti-inflammatory. Take three a day with food. And the last one is for anti-bacterial cream. You are to apply liberally to all open wounds-even the smallest scraps- every time you re-dress them- which should be once every few hours. 'Kay?"

"Gotchya." She confirmed with a smile and curt nod.

"Oh, and don't do that." He told her, in reference to her nod, "You may not have a concussion, but your head was definitely wounded. Any kind of sudden movements of the head could take you down a bad road. Also, try to avoid any kind of heavy-bass. Music, movie theaters, construction sites, anything. Got it?"

She looked him dead in the eye and nodded, "I'll see what I can do…"

Dr. Shepard stayed crouched down, a smile on his face as he remained too close to Bri for too long- at least in Spencer's mind.

"If that's all, Doctor," he started, walking up to the "professional" and lightly tugging him upward, "We really need to be going."

"Alright, but-"

"Uh-huh," Spencer mumbled as he helped Briana out of the wheel chair. She wrapped an arm around his neck, helping to support her in light of the twisted ankle.

The two hobbled to the door, ignoring the ramblings of the doctor, and opened the door.

"Oh! Hello." Nurse Pinky said from outside the door, holding up a pair of crutches wrapped in cellophane. "For you, dear." She said with a smile, handing the pack to Briana.

"Oh, thank you," Briana replied with a smile, grabbing the crutches her free hand. "Where do I pay for these?"

Pinky smiled. "Insurance already did."

"So, we're free to leave?" Spencer asked.

"Got your prescriptions?"

"Yup," Bri confirmed, waving the hand around Spencer's neck that held three sheets of paper.

Pinky's smile grew. "Then have a lovely day, you two."

"You too." Spencer smiled as he led Briana down the hallway.

"So, I take this one with food, and this one forty minutes after food." Briana specified to herself, setting her designated prescription bottles aside, "then I put the cream during re-dressing, which I should do at least an hour before going into water of any kind and then immediately after."

Spencer just nodded through her ramblings, fixing lunch for the both of them.

He turned around and placed a plate in front of her- turkey sandwich, potato chips and a glass of water. She frowned at the water.

"No caffeine for the first three days, remember?" Spencer scolded lightly with a smile. Pouting, Briana opened the bottle of anti-inflammatories a popped one into her mouth, chasing it with boring ol' H2O.

"This is why I don't go to the doctor," She told him after swallowing her drink, "It's always 'No'. No caffeine, no dairy products, no music, no movies. And if it is 'yes', it's usually bad. Like, 'Yes, you have cancer'. Either way, the doctor is screwing you over! We lived without constant medical intervention before, didn't we?" she ranted, almost comically in Spencer's eyes.

"True," he replied with a smile, "But rarely. Infant deaths were insanely high and if you lived past 40 you were considered a witch and burned at the stake for making a deal with the Devil."

She scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Semantics," she denounced, waving off his argument with a flick of her wrist, "Babies die anyway today. Hell, I'm not risking having one. I'm not going to wake up one day and find me three month dead for no reason other than SIDS. And frankly, I don't want to live to 50. No way in hell am I getting a colonoscopy." She announced with a stubborn arm cross and light head shake (doctor's orders and all).

Spencer laughed, "Well, if we didn't have doctors, no one would need a colonoscopy, now would they?"

Briana's face lit up and she smacked the counter top. "You get me!" She shouted through partially closed lips- trying to keep her chewed up lunch inside her mouth.

Spencer laughed again as his phone rang. It was a text from Hotch. They needed him in.

He frowned as he responded in the affirmative and slipped his phone back in his front pocket.

"I don't think anyone understands the concept of 'day off'," He complained, grabbing his keys and wallet from the counter top.

Briana nodded slightly in understanding, her cheeks puffed out like a chipmunk's while she chewed. She looked like a little five year old, completely innocent and untouched by the horrors of adult life. It was adorable.

Spencer smiled, kissed her stuffed cheek, realized how much he was going to regret that later, and promptly walked out of the apartment. He heard Briana laughing as he closed the door.

A/N: So...it's been awhile. (about 9 months for future readers' reference)
And Harrypotter-PercyJackson, I am sorry to say, but no. It's not from an episode.

The title of the story, in fact, is like Jeopardy. It's totally random trivia that you have no chance of knowing unless you actually know it. I'll tell where the title is from in the next chapter.