A.N: Here is the next chapter! Thanks for the lovely reviews, they were pretty amazing ;) This chapter is short but well... I guess you would say intense? I do not know but I will let you read and decided, then tell me what you think :)

Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or the characters...

Here we go...

Ziva stood staring at the dark green oak door, her mind was numb and so were her feet as she dripped cold water onto the floor. The dash from her car to the building had gotten her soaked, it was absolutely pouring and the wind driving behind it made it almost impossible for her to get into the building at least the tiniest bit dry. The door was only a meter away yet she couldn't seem to make herself step forward and reach for the door handle. She felt weak and needy coming here, coming to him. But the thought of returning home terrified her and as she stood there shaking she could think of only one person who would calm her down at that moment. She reached out hesitantly and paused before knocking loudly three times on the wooden door. The loud sound startled her as she remembered the man standing at her own door less than an hour ago. Compared to the few details she had received from Tony earlier; tall, handsome, blonde/brown hair; she felt almost certain that the man was Addison. Again she knocked growing more impatient. 27, 28, 29, 30… There was no answer. Feeling overtired and desperate she leant her forehead on the door, pounding with her right fist slowly before sliding down and curling up in a ball on the floor. Pounding started in her head and she let her eyes shut slowly, unable to keep them open any longer. Sleep deprived and cold she began to drift off sliding further and further down the wall until she lay on her side. She felt as if she had to move, she knew that she shouldn't be laying in the middle of the hallway but her body wouldn't respond so she let herself drift into a state of unconsciousness.

Strong arms surrounded her as she felt herself move away from the cold floor below her, she shivered as she clung to the warmth surrounding her. It took some time for her to come around to her senses, a door opened, she was inside a room. A musky, familiar smell surrounded her as she listened to the steady heartbeat below her ear. She was being carried and just from his smell she could tell who it was that held her. She didn't open her eyes but stayed still, listening to what was happening around her. Keys hit a table top somewhere and the door shut behind them, his shoes echoed throughout the apartment as they hit the wooden floor and she could hear him breathe close to her ear. In a weird way it seemed to soothe her and it sent a current across her skin making the hairs on her arms stand on end. She expected him to stop, they were in the living room from memory but he kept going until she felt his bed beneath her and a pillow under her head. Blankets were drawn around her and a kiss planted on her head. She smiled, hoping he didn't see and waited until he left the room before opening her eyes and rolling on her back. Staring at the ceiling she took the time to reflect. She couldn't help but again smile as she touched her hand to her forehead where he kissed her. It was small but had meant so much, surprising Ziva at how much it really did mean to her, how much he really did mean to her. She stayed staring at the ceiling for quite some time before sitting up and swinging her legs over the edge of the bed. Looking down she frowned at her dress attire of shorts and a baggy T-shirt, she felt almost embarrassed at realising the state she must be in and subconsciously ran a hand through her knotted wet hair. Tippy toeing across the floor she pressed an ear to the closed door and heard the soft hum of the TV. Cracking the door open she saw a black and white film on the screen and a black silhouette sitting in front of it. Hoping he wasn't staying up for her sake she opened the door and walked softly over to the sofa; on seeing her he turned off the TV and motioned for her to sit down.

"I'm sorry if I woke you or…"

"No, no, it was not you." They both sat in silence for a bit before she spoke again. "I am sorry for… For just barging in on you and for you know… falling asleep on your doorstep." She tried a laugh, failed miserably. He looked at her seriously, eyes full of concern.

"Ziva, what is wrong?" He reached over and grabbed her hand in his, hers tensed inside his and she looked down in utter surprise before finally letting it relax and mould in his. She looked up into his worried eyes as he studied her. What to say…

"I could not sleep; at all. That is why I finally fell asleep in front of your apartment." Again another nervous laugh, again it failed.

"That is not the reason you came here but."

"What do you mean?"

"Come on Ziva, you and me both know that it would take more than just not being able to sleep for you to come all the way over here." Biting her bottom lip she turned away before starting her explanation of what happened. She put in every detail as it flooded out with no pauses, Tony sat listening getting more worried by the second and when she finally finished her explanation he was unsure of what to say.

"I do not understand why I ran away. I feel so…" She tried to grope for the word but couldn't. "I would normally have no trouble staying there and standing up to him but I just, I just froze and then panicked!" She felt him stroke her hand and it only made her agitated.

"Ziva you did the right thing. He is dangerous, he has already gotten you once…" The look on her face made him stop and she stood up abruptly striding over to the window. She stood there taking deep breaths and looking at the street light below before pacing the living room.

"I feel, I feel like such a coward Tony!" He too now stood up and walked over, grabbing her shoulders to stop the pacing.

"You are not a coward Ziva."

"Yes but I should not of let him get me in the first place."

"Ziva it's…"

"Stop saying it is not my fault! Stop telling me I did the right thing Tony!" The edge on her words stopped Tony in his tracks and a look of hurt flickered across his face. What she said next was barely above a whisper. "And you know what is the worst part, I can't even remember what I did wrong, what happened. The last thing I remember besides the snippet of me drowning is you sitting in a chair across from me in Somalia." The words hurt much more than she wanted them to and again her dream ran vividly through her head. She looked away, not trusting her tired self and sure enough the tears began to trail down her cheek. Tony walk towards her and lifted her chin too look at him. Embarrassed she tried to turn her face away but he held it still, his gaze intense yet still holding some softness.

"I am sorry I am just tired…" He didn't say anything but instead took a step closer as his thumb lightly brushed a stray tear from her flushed cheek. She finally looked back up to his face which was closer than she expected. His gaze was intense and almost determined and she watched as his eyes shifted from her own down to her mouth.

"I wish you remembered those last moments." Her face showed confusion and his hand slid across her face to cup her cheek as he spoke. "Because if you did, it may have made this easier." He closed the gap between them as his lips descended gently on hers. It took her a while to respond but eventually she fell into sync with him, her lips moving gently against his. The kiss became harder as he realised she was finally kissing back and passion took drive as her hands twined with his hair. Neurons fired in her brain as images flooded her mind and she stopped, pushing away for air as everything began to come back starting at the underwater kiss. Tony pulled back as he realised something was the matter but her face was unreadable as she forced her eyes closed. The face of one Ryan Addison flooded her memory and she realised it was not the man at her door earlier on. More memories flooded back, some good and some terribly bad. She remembered the night she was drunk with Addison and she cringed at the frightening memory. All this time she wanted to remember and now she was wondering whether it would have been better if she didn't know at all.

"Ziva are you okay?" Her head snapped up to see his face, hurt, confused. She couldn't think, she could barely breathe and all of a sudden she felt as if she was in a bad place, that everything seemed wrong. She needed to get out and she started heading for the door. "Ziva!"

"I am sorry, but I need to go."

"Wait" He went to grab her but she stepped out of reach. He felt rejected and he had no idea what was happening. Her face stayed angled towards the floor and he couldn't make anything out in her expressions. "You can't just leave, what about Addison. You said he was at your apartment, you can't leave Ziva."

"It wasn't him."

"What?"

"I remember everything," and with that she was gone.

So... she remembered... haha Wow what would you think if you suddenly remembered all of that! Please tell me what you think! Next chapter we are going to see some Gibbs so stay tuned!

Keely :o)