So, by a unanimous decision, Noah was the winner of last time's rap battle. I've gotten quite a few requests for Courtney vs Gwen, and I've been wanting to do a female rap, so here it is. But to warn you: this is quite a bit more mean-spirited than the other ones. And that's saying something.
Language Warning: T, but there are many sexual references in this one. And a couple of F-bombs.
Epic Rap Battles of Total Drama!
Courtney (Shows Courtney growling and gritting her teeth)
V.S.
Gwen (Shows Gwen smirking)
…
Begin!
Courtney
You're a boyfriend stealer, it's a fact, I think I'll start my rap with that,
My rhymes are always organized, you string together rhyming crap!
You wanna take me down a notch? You're lookin' like a clown, beeyotch.
You think Duncan likes you as a person? His eyes are aimed right at your crotch!
Your gothiness cros-ses the line, you'll never ever be accepted!
But hey! (Pause) At least it gets that pervert Cody erected!
You've really got me pissed, you can't even write a list!
I'll imprint a list of why you suck inside your mind, with my fist!
I'm a respectable individual, the leading lady of my school,
You're just a freaky slut girl who looks like a creepy ghoul!
Ooo… did that hurt? Well it should, cause I hate you!
Was Trent smoking marijuana when he decided to date you?
You think you got friends? It was pity befriending,
You think you're a female? I really think it's pending,
The only time you've ever won is in an alternate ending!
Gwen
That's low, even for you, you goddamn dirty scoundrel,
How much political dick did you suck to be in Student Council?
I'm sorry I "stole" your boyfriend, but you need to calm down now.
Besides, you clung to Duncan more than that piercing on his eyebrow!
You're completely wild! An overgrown child, with a pinch of Heather!
You're the brats of the world compiled together!
You're as pleasant as the undead, did you take your morning meds?
Oh, fuck it! I'll take your bird shit bucket, slam it over your head!
You amaze me, you lazy crazy PDA nutcase!
The only type of fan you'll have is one to cool your butt face!
You need to go away, how bout a mile down south?
The first time I saw you, I felt some bile in my mouth!
Courtney
I was C.I.T! You're a freak who needs Vitamin D!
So I'll add to your tan with of my hand
And hope I don't get an S.T.D!
You scare me to the extreme!
I now have Gwenaphobia,
Whenever you see another guy, it's a major case of disrobia!
I'm an expert diplomat, and a master at combat,
I'll take a bat, combat your ass,
Until you go splat! How about that?
Just look at your face! Needs a facial, says Chris.
So I'll smear on your face some eucalyptus!
All you do is talk about death in the confession!
The storyboard writers were, having depression,
And had a few shots of booze in possession,
When they created you, the one I rue
In their story writing session!
Gwen
Well, they must've killed themselves, after they made you,
Explains your new voice actor in episode 2!
After all, they'd made a character worse than Zeke,
But you don't even have a cool accent when you speak!
The only way you'll ever win is with your sex slave lawyer,
But even he, can't save you from me, the ultimate prom destroyer!
You act like you're five, and you're always complaining!
If you fail a challenge, you can't go without saying,
That you can fuck up your team, cause you're a counselor in training!
But that's not how it works in the real world, I'm afraid,
Just plug your big mouth! How bout with a grenade?
The future's already dark, you just add to the gloom,
I'll beat you real bad and spread green jelly in your wounds!
Who won? Who's next? You decide! Please Review!