Beta-ed by MoonPieeNinjaax3

Chapter 5: Feelings for you?

Feliciano's POV:

"I'm home, fratello," I said as I closed the door.

Romano stepped out the kitchen with a ladle in hand. "Why didn't you call me? I could have picked you up."

"Uh, oh. Well, I was going to call but Mr. Beilschmidt and his brother offered to take me to home so..."

"You shouldn't have, idiot! You barely know them!" Romano argued.

There goes Romano and his mood swings. I started to take off his shoes."But grandpa said he knew their family!"

"Not an exception! You still should have called! I've told you a million times not to be so naive, Feliciano!"

Well, he's the big brother after all. "I'm sorry." Well not so much I got to spend more time with Ludwig.

"I would prefer it if you would call me," scolded Romano. He could be such a sweetheart at times.

"Thanks for taking care of me, fratello!" I hugged him and went up to my room. I knew for a fact that Romano liked being hugged by me, even if he hides it. The only exception was in front of other people. COUGH. Mr. Fernandéz. COUGH.

As I enter my room, I let my bag fall to the ground and throw myself on the bed. It was then that I realized how tired I am. After all, I'd spent my evening studying. Uck.

I closed my eyes for a moment and also noticed that I was so happy I hadn't been able to stop smiling. It was an incredible evening. I never thought I would say that with maths involved but Ludwig makes anything worth the effort and I never imagined he could look like that. I'm still impressed because I had always had the image of him in a suit, glasses and perfectly arranged hair set in my mind. Guess you shouldn't judge a book by its cover after all.

After thinking for a while, I took an sketchbook out of my drawer. I hate to admit but I had being drawing some portraits of Ludwig. Maybe I have already almost filled the sketchbook with drawings of him already but today was special. I began my task. I've always thought that he's handsome but seeing him in that informal way, he looked even better. He looked so good with his messy hair falling in his face. His body is amazing, I wonder how it feels being hugged by those arms. His skin seems so smooth and his lips seem so soft...

I could feel myself slowly fell asleep as I imagined being hugged and kissed by Ludwig. First, a sweet innocent kiss but after a while, the kissing was deeper and more passionate. Then I began undressing Ludwig, caressing him and kissing his chest and neck. Ludwig then stripped me of my clothing as well. I could felt a heat increasing inside myself. Oh dear...

The sound of the door opening brought my attention back to reality, "I see you're tired, Feli. You want me to bring you something to eat?"

I could feel myself blushing furiously. I tried to hide my face with a pillow and remained laying on my warm bed. I hope grandpa doesn't notice this-this-this lump! I've gotta find an excuse! "I'm fine, Grandpa. I'll take a shower and go to sleep."

"Are you sure, Feli?" I nodded in reply. "Oh, I see you're drawing. What are you doing now?"

A-ah! No! I can't let him see such a thing! I quickly closed the notebook yet nervously. I think this surprised Grandpa, I always show him my works. "I want it to be a surprise, Grandpa. And it isn't finished yet!" Let me tell you, lying and having control over the body wasn't an easy task. I think this is the first time in my life that I am begging for Grandpa to disappear.

"Are you feeling alright? Your face is really red!"

"Really, I'm fine." I was trying my hardest to hold it.

"Okay then. Please get some rest for now," Arsenius said. I knew he was really concerned about me.

"Good night, Grandpa." Please, just leave!

"Good night, Feli." Finally.

Once the door was closed, I ran to my bathroom and prepared the shower. I got undressed and got rid of my 'problem'. I need to control myself, I'm clumsy enough. But every time he's around I just lose my mind. He's the only thing I see in the whole world! Should I tell him about my feelings? But what would he say? I was surprised I liked him at the beginning because it's the first time I've ever been attracted to a man but know I realise that is also the first time I feel like this for a person. I want to know everything about him, be with him, make him happy but...what if he rejects me? I don't even know if he has somebody else, or if he'll accept my feelings. I mean, for him, I may just be a dumb kid.

All my joy turned suddenly into depression. A few tears rolled over my cheeks. I don't know what to do now. I want to tell him how I feel but at the same time, I'm afraid I'll end up with my heart broken. Why is being in love so difficult? Wait, 'love'? Is that what I feel for him? I mean, love is a serious thing. You don't just say that to anyone but I think I do love him. Next thing I know, I'm drowning my sobs in my pillow and falling asleep whilst crying.

~OwO~

Ludwig's POV:

That idiot, he just doesn't know when to shut the fuck up. I was still mad at Gilbert but I still had to call the idiots-AHEM-the friends Gilbert always hung out with to find where he is. "Hello?" Came a voice from the end of the reciever. I was sure it was the French one, Francis.

"Hello, Francis. I was wondering if my brother is with you." I could hear some chatter in the background.

"He sure is, mon ami. We found him crying on the streets in the middle of the night. He was just telling us the saddest story." Antonio's laughter could be heard in the background.

"Francis, is that Ludwig?" There was no mistake that was Gilbert. I think the phone was put on loudspeaker. Oh, great. I can't wait for his complaining and whining. "Hey, Ludwig. How could you leave your bruder all alone like that?"

"Calm down, Gilbo. Your brother is clearly worried about you otherwise he wouldn't have called. Right, Ludi?"

I shivered at the last phrase, "Please, Francis. I've asked you not to call me that."

"But you're my best friends little brother! We are practically like family, Ludi."

I am no longer impressed of how stupid these guys could be. I just hope they aren't drunk... "Are you guys drunk already?"

"We are just enjoying the night, brother. I could have invited you but since you left me on my own," Gilbert said as Antonio laughed in the background.

"As if I wanted to be with you, idiot."

"Is it because we are not Italian that you turn us down, Ludwig? You hurt my feelings, I didn't think you were that superficial," he teased as Francis joined in on the laughter.

He was getting on my nerves. "You never learn, Gilbert."

Antonio stopped laughing a spoke up, "I understand you, Lud. Those brothers are simply adorable. Ellos son la cosa mas linda."

"Shut up, pedo. I don't even understand what you're saying," I retorted.

"Oh, I didn't know you were into little boys, mon cher. Is that why you never reacted to my flirting?" The trio was laughing harder now. I can't take it anymore. I turned my phone off. The last thing I wanted was to listen to those drunk bastards and being bullied by them like when I was younger. Why did fate allow three sick people like them gather? he would never know but as long as he could be away from them everything would be fine.

When I arrived home, I was sure to lock the door so those drunks won't break into the apartment in the early morning. It would probably be Gilbert's idea of revenge. I went directly to my room.

It was 11:30pm but I wasn't sleepy so I decided to read a little. I turned to my bedside table and picked up a book. I read the first few lines but I couldn't concentrate. Gilbert's words echoed through my head. I resisted the urge to bang my head against the wall.

I don't usually listen what bruder said, well I never did, but this time was different. I know that I wasn't any good with anything that had romance as its subject. Actually I sucked at it. Anyways, not everything that dummkopf said was far from reality. I did notice how Feliciano looked at me quite a few times but it didn't bother me or make me nervous. At the time, I kind of enjoyed his attention. Even thought I was working, I was having a good time. I felt calm but why? Since I began giving classes, this kid stood out from the rest as if he had a special brightness. It's true that he's dorky, weak and loud but he's a good kid and a good looking boy. Antonio did mention he was popular with girls. It's expected with that smile of his. Every time he smiles, he makes me feel good. Almost...happy. And his big eyes...you can easily get lost in those eyes! Also, that language tic he has, it's cute. What I'm I saying? Bruder will be laughing at me for these corny thoughts...

I'm going too far! He's my student! I could get in trouble! Well, Gilbert is right. I'm not that old. He's, like, 17 and I'm 22… Wait! What-I-I'm I even considering it? I must be reasonable! I'm his teacher and w-we are men and the possibility of him liking me is…

Why did I suddenly care so much about it? I should be ashamed of what I'm thinking? Me with that kid. A provocative image of me with Feliciano crossed my mind. After all, those videos he watched when Gilbert wasn't home left my imagination to wonder a lot. "What the hell?" I asked my self aloud as I hit myself on the head.

Ludwig, stop thinking like that. Feliciano is worth more than that but also it wouldn't be bad to give it a try... Wait a sec, what did I just say? I didn't just consider the boy an object, did I? His personality, his looks, everything made him something valuable and precious. Something he would willingly protect and love. Love? Crap, I'm in trouble now. Was I falling for a boy and younger than me? How could it work out? I know I'm kind of...um...attractive but there has always been the trouble of my personality. I'm lost. When it came to expressing my feelings...no wonder why I'm still single. People around me think that I'm a cold person but it's just...well...I'm shy. It's a normal matter. Not everybody is able to communicate that easily with the others, right? Who am I kidding?

That night, I couldn't sleep at all with the idea of me being with Feliciano in a relationship running through my mind.

~OwO~

Translation Notes:
Ellos son la cosa mas linda - They are the most beautiful thing.
Dummkopf - Moron.