Titans: Elemental

Chapter 93: Episode 257-494 Don't Touch that Dial, Part 2

We see Dick, whose tunic has inflated to become a life preserver.

Dick, "I already told you, I don't have time for this!"

He is standing at the stern of a speedboat and addressing two big fellows.

The blond boater says in an Australian accent, "ah, don't chicken out now, mate. The world's watching Stunt-Fest to see eye-popping stunts, and that's just what they're gonna get."

Dick, "I'm not going to-"

He is shoved backward off the boat; the movement reveals a pair of water skis on his feet and a rope connecting the rod in his hands to the stern. A small camera floats nearby to capture the action, which starts in earnest as he tries desperately to keep his balance. Looking ahead, he finds himself being pulled toward a very high ramp.

Dick, "huh?"

We see his screaming face as he goes airborne. The water below him is clear and blue, until a huge shark leaps up, ready to take a healthy bite out of him.

….

Bryan is seen shooting at the characters from the awful reboot, yelling, "and this is for that stupid song about pancakes and the twerking! This is a kid's show for Pete's sake!"

….

We see the soap opera from earlier. Rebecca, the young woman in those scenes, is here, and Vic comes in.

Rebecca, "oh, Lance. I didn't mean to make you fall madly in love with me. But ever since Joaquim left with my evil half-sister-"

Vic, "yo! I don't love you! I'm already dating a woman named Sarah! My name's not Lance, and I just need to know if you've seen a fat guy in an overcoat!"

Rebecca, "oh, Lance!"

She tries to kiss Vic, who quickly moves out of the way and lets her fall to the ground.

Vic, "nope."

Joaquim enters, "what the-?"

….

Jack is seen running across the courtyard of a high school by several girls in skimpy schoolgirl outfits.

One looks to be a succubus with blue hair, wings and huge…. Eyes.

One is an alien woman with crazy green hair.

One is an Angel with short blue hair and a halo above her head.

One is a ninja with pale purple eyes.

Jack, "I keep telling you! I'm not interested in you girls! What makes me so interesting to all of you?! Aaaaaagh!"

The girls yelled as they chased him, "love us, senpai!"

….

We see a very dark area under two groups of floodlights; the sort found at large stadiums. Raven walks through here, her voice echoing a bit when she speaks.

Raven, "hello? Anybody?"

A football sails into view and lands neatly in her hands.

Raven, "nice."

At least a dozen beefy players try to tackle Raven, who quickly uses her powers to send them flying back.

A sportscaster begins commentary as a referee's whistle and crowd cheering are heard.

Sportscaster, "oh! That had to hurt! Let's look at the replay, Chuck."

A circle is drawn around Raven, as if the play were being diagrammed.

Sportscaster, "you know, I'm not sure why a Titan is on the field in a championship game, but this is just a poor defensive play by the Steel City Tigers."

The freeze frame ends, a second circle winks out, and everyone flies back. Several unconscious faces are drawn to stand for the people flung back.

….

We see a test pattern; Raven is sprawled out among the colored bars, but she puts herself back in order with the help of her "soul-self."

Vic tumbles into view a moment later, evidently having gotten on Joaquim's bad side, and the Jones Lake monster comes in next. It knocks the bars aside to get at the pair, but Raven levitates a few and smashes them over its head. The farthest one to the left is grabbed and thrown by Vic; it bounces off the scaly hide and sails straight at the readers!

….

Kom' is surrounded by a bunch of anime men doing over the top gestures.

She smirked and said, "I'm fine with this…."

….

We see the black-and-white 1950s sitcom. Mom has whipped up a stack of pancakes.

Sitcom mom, "would you like some more flapjacks, dear?"

We see Changeling at the kitchen table, in full color and wearing a magenta letterman's sweater over his outfit. It is trimmed in white and bears a large T.

Changeling, "totally, I-I mean…."

Remembering how he should act in this particular situation, he licks his palm and runs it through his unruly green hair to arrive at a more appropriate style for the times.

Changeling, "gee whiz, Mom", Dad sits by him, reading the newspaper, "that'd be keen."

She puts the platter before him, and he wastes no time in shoveling down its contents.

Sitcom dad, "say, sport, it says in the paper that your schoolmates are organizing a nifty sock hop."

The doorbell rings.

Sitcom mom, "oh! That must be the milkman."

She goes to the front door and opens it-and there, in full color, is the robot Seven-Gorn-Seven. It is so huge that the top of the frame comes up only to its chest, but this problem is solved with it smashing through the wall. Mom lets off a scared little squeal; out comes an array of fearsome weapons, including a couple of lasers that blast the rest of the flapjacks to kingdom come.

Changeling, "Jeepers!"

Seven-Gorn-Seven's shadow extends over him.

….

Rose is standing on a pirate ship where a bunch of crazy people are sailing it.

She looks at the writer and says, "really? A beeping pirate show? Just because I'm wearing a beeping eyepatch? You mother-"

….

Raven is now in a show similar to that of Pokemon. As she walked along, she was followed by a small yellow creature resembling a rat or rabbit with a tail shaped like a lightning bolt and wearing a red bandana.

It was going, "Kika-Chu?"

Raven, "hmm, cute little thing…. Maybe I'll have to watch this show at some point…."

….

We see the animated show featuring the pelican character; Starfire is here, and it looks all about during the following.

Pelican, "oh, have you seen my hippo? He hides and I must seek."

Starfire, "I cannot play. Please, do you know a strange man named Control Freak? He is big, not tall, and nasty, and known for causing strife. He escaped into the TV-"

The pelican ducks into a mushroom, and Changeling runs across, having ditched the '50s duds.

Changeling, "hey, Star, run for your life!"

A laser blast from the direction he came wipes out a tree next to her; she screams and gets her own feet moving just before the giant robot lurches in.

….

Jack is now chasing the anime girls with a giant baseball bat.

He yelled, "back! Back, foul demons! My purity is for Raven! Not for you!"

The anime girls bump into the reboot characters as Bryan comes in and growls, "this is getting nuts!"

….

We then see a large bear in the forest. The blond guy on the speedboat, who took Dick water-skiing, steps into view here; he is the host of Stunt-Fest.

Blond boater SF host, "next on Stunt Fest, I'm gonna make this angry grizzly give me a piggyback-"

A blast shoots across the screen, cutting him off abruptly, and he backs up into the bear, which is now on its hind feet. It lays into him as the Offworld Outlaw strides in; a brief look around reveals Dick at a short distance. The Titan turns to face him, revealing the water skis still clamped to his boots. Each gets his hands ready at his belt, the Outlaw throwing back his poncho to uncover a pair of holstered six-shooters and spitting out the toothpick in his mouth. Dick whips out two wingdings, only to have them blown apart in his hands, and the Outlaw levels a pistol at him again. Before he can fire, though, the bear's growling draws his attention. This gives Dick the opening he needs to land a crashing punch that flattens the gunslinger, and provokes the bear into attacking the blond Aussie all over again. Dick's tunic has now deflated, and he has gotten rid of the skis.

The Outlaw is soon up to his knees, firing a grappling hook from a launcher hidden under one sleeve. It snags in Dick's tunic and sends a powerful electric shock into his body; he collapses to the grass, then looks up to see the alien approaching. Before the Outlaw can do any more damage, though, a sonic cannon blast plows him away, Vic has made his way to this show from the test-pattern brawl. He and Raven arrive on the scene.

Dick, "thanks."

Raven, "don't thank us yet."

Vic, "we brought a friend."

Meanwhile, the grizzly bear has pinned the Stunt Fest host and is about to slice him open from top to toe, but both are interrupted when the Jones Lake monster plows through the trees. It stands erect, bellowing in fury, and is immediately washed out by static that flickers out to leave the screen blank. What follows next is a calm male voice reading ad copy-commercial time.

Announcer, "the makers of Azarath and Metrion are proud to introduce Zinthos."

Dick, Vic, and Raven run in and are met by Changeling, Jack, Bryan and Starfire.

Backfire and Rose both fall down in front of the others.

Announcer, "new and improved Zinthos gives you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it."

The Outlaw and Seven-Gorn-Seven move against them and are soon joined by the Jones Lake creature.

Announcer, "and because it's blue…. Zinthos goes with everything."

A free-for-all breaks out, during which the next line scrolls past at the bottom of the screen and the following things happen. One, a misplaced shot from the giant robot blows away the creature.

Two, Changeling becomes a bighorn sheep and rams the Outlaw out of the picture; as he resumes human form, the villain's black cowboy hat settles on his head.

Bryan grabbed it and said, "I'm keeping this."

Three, Vic and Seven-Gorn-Seven fire at each other, their beams canceling out in the space between, and begin a high-powered tug of war that finally destroys the robot.

Four, the anime girls run at Jack, but Raven quickly sends them all flying out of frame.

Five, Blackfire and Rose dodge the muscular anime dudes as they run across the area.

Six, the Kikachu flies across the area and zaps the reboot characters for good measure.

Announcer, "Zinthos isn't right for everyone and may cause bloating, cramping, hair loss, disturbing visions, fits of rage, and growth of additional eyes. Children under three should not be exposed to Zinthos. Do not get Zinthos wet, and never feed it after midnight. If you experience trouble meditating, stop saying "Zinthos" and consult your ancient scrolls immediately.

By now, all the Titans are gathered at the center screen.

Announcer, "new blue Zinthos."

….

We see the upper reaches of Master Hagadash's dojo as seen earlier. The black/red-X banner hangs from the ceiling; the Titans are in the middle of the floor.

Bryan tips his hat as Changeling says, "dude, those were three of the baddest bad guys ever, and we totally kicked their butts!"

Bryan, "and I got an awesome hat! I'm totally keeping thing from now on."

Dick, "but we still haven't found Control Freak."

Control Freak, "true, grasshopper…. But I have found you!"

A full head-on view shows that all his clothing and accessories are now in shades of gray and black. His shoes are different, and he wears steel wrist guards as well.

Control Freak, "and guess what? I know kung fu. Whoa."

A chunk of ice hits him in the head!

Jack yelled, "no! You have no right to do a Keanu impression! He is way cooler than you'll ever be!"

Rose, "yeah! Beep you, dude!"

Control Freak growls and propels himself off the floor for a leap that thumbs its nose at the law of gravity, and comes down with a shrill cry to kick Dick and Jack away. Without touching the ground, the fat yo-yo catches Vic and Kom' with a spin kick that drives them into a support beam, shattering it. Smoke trails from the boots give away the jet thrusters built into them. Now Control Freak does a spinning handstand, pushes off into the air, and dives again; Starfire prepares to let him have it, but he bounces off her head before she can fire. Raven, standing next to her, creates a platform above herself to deflect his aerial stomp. It shatters on the first bounce, and he yanks her cloak up over her head before diving away. He manages to kick Rose and Bryan in midair as well! The onslaught ends with Dick and Jack crashing to the floor at opposite ends of the dojo before Control Freak touches down.

Control Freak, "I'm not just some nerd you can push around anymore. Thanks to the magic of television, I now possess a black belt in Astro-Jitsu….", he hovers briefly, "... the Bionic Hero's rocket boots….", he briefly creates an energy ball above his head, "... Benthar's wristbands of power….", he reaches into his coat, "... and Captain Caleel's infamous gravo-blaster!"

Bryan mutters, "and yet he still can't get a girlfriend…. Shocker!"

Raven slides up to Changeling who is drooling a bit at all this futuristic hardware.

Raven, "what did he say; in English?"

Changeling, "he's one seriously bad dude."

Rose, "no beep."

Now the dude in question slips on a pair of sunglasses similar to those worn by Arnold Schwarzenegger in The Terminator.

Control Freak, "Hasta la vista, Titans!"

Using the rocket boots, he blasts off toward the ceiling.

Jack, "you don't deserve to quote Arnold either!"

….

We see the exterior of a very tall building at night. Control Freak touches down on the top. Dick, Kom' and Starfire are there in a heartbeat, the latter two throwing every starbolt they can summon, but he just yawns, having ditched the shades now, and lets his wrist guards stop the shots. The three stop short and scramble to avoid the ricochets coming right back at them. Control Freak has little time to celebrate before Changeling tackles him as a gorilla, and both roll off the edge of the roof.

….

We see the cooking show that has popped up on the airwaves from time to time. The chef is hard at work.

Chef, "and when the chocolate has melted, we add the snails."

The broadcast is rudely interrupted when Changeling and Control Freak crash through the ceiling, wiping out everything on the counter. The green Titan transforms into a velociraptor and goes after the escapee, who starts shooting back at him. As the hapless chef peeks up from behind the counter, the long dinosaur tail whips his hat off. A moment later, Changeling is knocked into view, back in human form.

Chef gasps, puts his hat back on, and waved a white flag and says, "I cannot work in these conditions!"

He runs for it just before the Titan becomes a tiger and leaps at Control Freak for another go-but the rocket boots' exhaust pushes him back into the air. Within a second or so, he has turned into a hummingbird to get out of the gas streams, then a hippopotamus with the intent of flattening his enemy. A gravo-blaster beam suspends him just short of his target; he is pushed back out through the hole in the ceiling, and stops on the animated program. The pelican is looking here and there in a very hilly area, still trying to find that missing hippo, and right on cue, Changeling floats into frame.

The Pelican starts hugging him, "oh, hippo, my hippo, I have missed you so!"

….

Back with the horror movie. Vic and Bryan are on the run, firing their cannon and laser gun back at the flying Control Freak and dodging the latter's blaster shots. They are brought up short with a pair of gasps when the portly couch potato lands right in front of them; a moment later, Control Freak leaps across the sodden yards and lands a high kick that dumps Bryan and Vic flat. Raven and Jack on a slab of Earth circle around, putting him off guard as he tries to follow their movements, so they do not notice the tree behind him coming under their control. As they raise it high, Dick, Kom', Changeling in human form, and Starfire arrive on/around the limbs near their perch.

Raven and Jack bring their hands down, sending the mass of wood straight toward Control Freak. Instead of running for dear life, though, he hunches down and throws one fist forward to split it down the middle. The Titans in the branches jump down and charge him, Vic, Rose and Bryan move in from the other direction, and stand their ground for a long moment.

Control Freak, "engage!"

The boots kick into gear and send him upward, throwing out huge waves that swamp everyone and fill the area. When they clear, Raven is the only one even remotely dry, having created an umbrella-shaped shield over her head.

Dick, "well…. At least things can't get any worse."

Rose, "dude! Don't beeping say that!"

The background flips to static, then clears to gray and the words "NEWS ALERT" slide into view in front of them. This view shrinks to become a graphic in the top left corner of the screen, revealing the news anchor doing a bulletin.

Anchor, "this just in. Interference by the criminal Control Freak has caused televisions throughout the city to emit harmful alpha waves, which disrupt the neural pathways of anyone watching the broadcast."

….

We see various people staring vacantly straight ahead, the glow of a Television set flickering over them.

The anchor speaks as we see all this. The graphic has now changed to show the word "ZOMBIES" in big red letters, along with a group of them shambling through a cemetery.

….

We see Changeling, dressed in a suit and with his hair neatly combed for once. Dick and Vic are behind him.

Changeling, "huh?"

He and Raven are at the far end of the anchor desk; she has traded her cloak for a green blazer and is wearing the brooch as a lapel pin. Both have been pressed into newsroom duty, it seems, and the other Titans are gathered behind them.

Anchor, "TV literally rots your brains."

Raven starts stacking copy sheets, "told you."

….

We see two men, sitting in armchairs under side-by-side spotlights, in a setup similar to those used on PBS interview/commentary shows. The man on the left, the host, is bald, bespectacled, and bearded, with a stack of note cards in hand.

Interview host, "my guest tonight is Dr. Victor Payton, who has discovered the secret to world peace. Tell me, Doctor-"

He gets no further, as the Titans barrel through the studio at full gallop, knocking him and the cards everywhere. Changeling and Raven are back in their usual clothes. Payton stares incredulously as Dick moves back into view to address the people watching the TV.

Dick, "do not watch this program", he runs up and seizes the camera, "it will liquefy your brain! An escaped criminal has tampered with this transmission, and it is imperative that you turn off your television right now…. I'm serious! Stop watching this show!"

Raven leans in, "I don't think they're listening."

Changeling, "of course they're not listening! Breaking news, escaped criminals, a handsome, green heartthrob, this stuff is ratings gold!"

Rose jokes, "who's the heartthrob?"

Changeling growled.

Dick, "if people won't turn off their TVs, there's only one way to save millions of viewers. We've gotta stop Control Freak fast!"

Starfire, "but how are we to do this? Inside the television, he is more powerful than Glorthrok the All-Seeing."

Kom', "and believe us, he's tough!"

Vic, "yeah, the dude knows everything in here."

Changeling leans in, "hel-lo? He's not the only one who's watched too much TV. I've wasted my whole life in front of the tube, and it's about to pay off. Come on!"

….

Spinning-screen transition, similar to the one often used on Batman, with the Titans' insignia moving rapidly toward and then away from the camera.

….

We see the team's silhouettes; they are standing in front of a scrolling program grid, most of whose slots are marked "nothing."

Dick, "five hundred channels!"

Raven, "and still nothing on."

Bryan, "when is there ever anything on?"

Vic, "he could be anywhere!"

Changeling, "there!"

He runs to the grid and points out a particular slot.

Changeling, "the Space Network is having a Clash of the Planets marathon. If I was Control Freak, and I am so glad I'm not, that's where I'd be."

Starfire, "please, this Clash of the Planets is-"

Changeling Jack and Rose of all people yell, "-only the greatest sci-fi series ever made!"

Everyone looks at Rose in confusion.

Rose, "what? I'm not allowed to like nerdy stuff?"

Bryan, "that just makes you more awesome to me, babe."

Changeling, "for an entire generation of fans, it's not just a TV show. It's a way of life."

The title slides in behind Changeling.

Sunbeams shine from behind the text block; he gazes up adoringly at the display, but Starfire is considerably less at ease with this sudden outpouring of support.

….

We see outer space.

There seems to be a letterbox ratio in this world.

This aspect ratio will remain until further notice. We go through the stars and planets to stop on an impressive ship,

….

We see a very wide, very deep vertical shaft within. A narrow catwalk leads to a suspended platform at the center, similar to the one on which Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader battled it out near the end of The Empire Strikes Back. Here comes Baron Ryang and the young man he menaced in the clip Changeling was watching earlier, battling their way along the walk. The former still has his double blade, while the latter has armed himself with a laser sai. After trading a few strikes, the two lean face to face.

Baron Ryang, "Murakam has taught you well."

COTP Boy, "this ends now!"

Baron Ryang, "on the contrary."

A hard shove puts the youthful fighter on his back and knocks the sai from his hands; we dee him, flat on the catwalk, as Ryang's weapon is lowered toward him.

Baron Ryang, "my reign of evil has just begun. I shall never be defeated! Nev-"

The boast is chopped off when Control Freak flies across the screen and plows Ryang over the edge. He tumbles screaming into the abyss as the young man watches in disbelief. Ryang's retracted sword spins neatly into the fat lunatic's up-raised hand. He then makes a very precise landing on the catwalk. The youth scrambled backward toward the central platform to stay away from the slowly advancing figure, which has now donned a black cape and helmet to cover the overcoat.

COTP Boy, "who are you?"

The rocket boots step a bit nearer before stopping. We then see all of Control Freak's new ensemble; black clothing under the coat and cape, metal neck piece and shoulder guards, helmet that comes down low over his eyes.

Control Freak, "I am Count Roll Freakow, the twelfth-level space samurai who trained Baron Ryang! And I am your father!"

COTP Boy, "NOOOOO!"

….

We see a corridor elsewhere in the ship. Down the way, Changeling leans into view around the corner to scope out the joint; a string of hand signals brings the rest of the Titans in, but he gets so caught up in them that he does not notice their passage immediately. Finally, he gets it and hustles to catch up.

Vic, "hey! I remember this scene! We're in the first episode of Season Four."

Dick, "how do you know we're going the right way?"

Changeling, "'cause we just passed the engine core, which means we're right below the detention level."

Jack said, "yeah. So all we have to do is follow the main particle flux conduit to the galactic command center."

Rose said, "and we'll need to look out for any robots patrolling the area."

Raven, Bryan and Starfire are left behind for the moment.

Raven, "frightening. Truly frightening."

Bryan, "my brother and girlfriend are nerds…. Could be worse."

The Titans step up and stop, surprised; many armed robots are posted here. They turn as one, leveling their blasters.

Robot, "identify yourselves!"

Six out of nine Titans get fists and projectiles ready; Changeling, though, just walks off to one side and catches Raven flat-footed by swiping her cloak.

Rose puts on Bryan's new hat and gives a thuggish look as Jack pulls his hood up to look like a cloaked warrior.

As the others watch, trying to figure out if they have totally gone bonkers, Changeling puts the cloak on and starts into his Obi-Wan Kenobi "Jedi mind trick" impression.

Changeling, "you don't need to see our identification."

Jack, "we are free to go about our business."

The robots trade a quizzical glance and promptly open fire.

Changeling, "worth a shot!"

He yells as the others charge past, Raven grabs her cloak back, Bryan grabs his hat back, and Changeling becomes a triceratops to join the fracas.

….

We see a patch of outer space, against which the young man who fought it out on the catwalk is knocked into view. This is the ship's deck. The panorama is seen through the view screens. Control Freak walks up. As the youth stands, the overzealous fan raises his weapon; the two blades are extended to one side. At the far end behind him, the door opens to reveal the Titans' silhouettes; Changeling is back in human form. He turns to them.

Dick, "Titans! Go!"

They do so.

Control Freak raises his blades; energy crackles out, "there can be only one!"

Jack, "wrong franchise, idiot!"

Control Freak goes on the offensive like no one's business, driving Kom', Starfire and Raven away and facing off against Vic and Bryan next. The brawl moves underneath an elevated platform; he severs a pipe to release a flood of steam into the cyborg's faces. Above him, Dick and Rose leap up the wall and flings down two handfuls of discs, whose explosions just miss Control Freak after his last-second dive. The three race across the deck, keeping abreast of one another, and Dick smirks and throws a sarcastic wave. His opponent stares confusedly, not knowing what to make of this, and then runs flat into the barrier Raven has erected in his path.

He loses his helmet in the fall, and she has barely taken down the shield before Jack shoots fire and ice at the nerdy villain. Control Freak quickly dodged the attacks as Changeling makes the scene. One second is all it takes him to assume the form of a roaring tyrannosaurus rex, but Control Freak claps his headgear back on, sneers, and fires a grappling hook. The line winds around the huge green snout, snapping it shut, and Changeling assumes human form before being yanked to the floor.

Starfire, Kom' and Raven get down to it with a starbolt barrage and a levitated computer cabinet being flung across the deck. All Control Freak does in response is to leisurely swing his weapon, parrying every blast and heavy object that comes his way.

Control Freak, "your powers are insignificant next to the power of Control Freak!"

He holds one palm toward a distant bank of computers-and in a display that would impress even Raven, it tears loose under his control and goes flying. Starfire and Kom' are hit full on, as is the original telekinetic, who has put up a shield to stop whatever he can throw at her. All three are left buried in the wreckage while Dick and Rose swing in, kicking the double-blade saber out of Control Freak's hand. Retracted, it clatters to the floor by Dick's feet as he comes down in a crouch.

We see the self-styled Count, who raises one hand effortlessly, then pulls back. The weapon returns to him in a moment; he extends the blades and gets set to attack, but Jack is there to take up the fight before he can move.

Rose flips and somersaults between the two, trying to buy her buddy a little time, and gets her fighting staff into play. Now she finds herself in the one-on-one fight and tries a couple of swings, only to have the shaft slashed into three pieces, two half-length ends and a short piece matching the space between the double blades. In slow motion, Control Freak throws himself at Rose, raising the saber to give him the closest haircut she has ever had or will ever have. A half-speed scream escapes the fleshy lips as he starts his descent; we focus on Rose as Jack starts to run up from behind. Normal speed resumes and Rose takes a kick to the chest. Control Freak somersaults backwards and pushes off from Jack's back, driving him to the floor as well.

The melee reaches a sudden pause when Changeling plants his foot down. An irate expression on his face and the coiled line from Control Freak's grappling hook in hand. He throws this aside; the enemy retracts his blades. Their eyes twitch and narrow slightly, giving no hint of what is to come next: a split-second transformation into a king-size elephant, but the tubby wacko is ready for it. Putting both hands together in front, he creates an energy ball, gathers his strength, and charges with a savage scream. When the two meet, the pachyderm is smashed backward and comes down on top of the captain's chair, wiping out most of the equipment in the area. As he skids to a stop and resumes human form, the entire ship starts to tremble from the system overloads he has just set off.

All the other Titans are shaken off their feet by the vibrations, but Control Freak retains his balance even as his "son" bails out. Next to come down are the black matte bars at the top and bottom of the screen, restoring the full-frame aspect ratio.

Changeling stands up, with effort, "I don't care how tough you are, dude! There's no way I'm letting you win!"

Control Freak, "foolish snot-colored human", he extends the saber blades, "have you forgotten that I am a twelfth-level space samurai? Have you forgotten that in here…. I control the universe?"

Changeling, "no…. But I've seen every episode of this show, like, three hundred times. And I think you've forgotten that a twelfth-level space samurai can be banished to the null dimensions by the Hop Joon Chant!"

Rope, "neeeeeerd."

Control Freak's eyes widened in surprise.

Changeling starts the chant. He has placed his hands over his head and is rubbing them together.

Changeling, "Hop Joon Kang…. Hop Joon Kang…. Hop Joon Kang…."

Lightning strikes the raised blades on this last repetition and raises their wielder off his feet. More bolts make him drop the saber and leave him visible as only a writhing, screaming silhouette; it takes him a moment to get a real word out.

Control Freak, "NOOOOO!"

The energy intensifies into a blinding glare, within which his image disintegrates. When the area clears, he is back in his normal outfit and confined to a square panel at screen center.

Control Freak bangs at it, "but…. But…. But this is my world!"

The panel starts to pivot about a vertical line through its center to expose his back on the flip side; it is as flat as a pane of glass, and the chant has imprisoned him in it.

Control Freak, "I'm cool here", it stops and shows his back; he turns around, "you guys can't win!"

Jack said, "you forgot something, dork…."

Changeling, "this is television. The good guys always win. And you are so not the good guys."

Control Freak is carried away; the young man is just behind, and a small red-and-yellow robot is beeping away at him. The two trade a hug, and Raven and Vic lean in.

Raven, "please tell me you know how to get us home."

He gives her a big grin and wink as a sweat drop rolls down his temple.

Dick, "don't worry. I've got that handled. I've got Zatanna on speed dial…."

….

Later….

We once again see the tower.

It is now the next day.

In the living room, everyone but Vic is drinking hot cocoa on the couch. Silkie sleeps in a basket near Starfire's feet.

Percy is snuggled up on Jack's lap.

Dick, "well, I guess this whole experience proves it really is bad to watch too much TV."

Embarrassed, Changeling pulls his head down on this.

Starfire, "but truthfully, we only prevailed because Changeling watches too much the television."

He perks up.

Raven, "so, there really isn't a lesson here."

Vic's hand lands on the couch as he said, "yep."

Now Vic is here as well, and he has brought Sarah, rather than Rebecca from the soap opera he crashed into, since that would make zero sense.

Vic, "it was all completely meaningless."

All laugh, but lapse into confused silence as an audience laugh track is heard.

Bryan, "let's hope the writers fix this…. I can't stand that laugh track!"

….

Reviews:

raven2012: I'm glad you really enjoyed this chapter. And I like your idea you had, so I added it in.

Canadude2029: I'm glad you enjoyed this chapter and are excited for all the stuff I have planned.

Bailey Radcliff: thanks so much. I'm glad you've been enjoying this story, and I hope your story turns out amazing.

pokemonking0924: same here. I'm glad you liked the jokes I added in.

….

I LOVED writing the gags in this chapter. I threw in some gags suggested by a few people.

And I just wanna thank everyone who voted on my Scooby Doo poll over the last couple of weeks. We finally have votes from 20 people. Soon, I'll have a new poll up. Probably by next weekend. So keep an eye out.