Today was the day.
I could feel it. The air around me was a little heavier on my skin.
The world looked a little grayer.
It was unsettling, the way everyone was talking and I sat here, not quite dying, more like dancing in anticipation.
Would I last to sunset?
I felt like a child when I opened the door to Watari's office that morning.
Could he feel it too? The slight edge in the way the earth felt? The way it pushed at us as though trying to shift us over to make room for something new?
When I didn't answer his greeting, he turned to face me like he did when I was younger and came into his room, fresh nightmare lodged on my shoulders.
My voice was steady as I told him of my plan- the only thing I could think of that may save myself.
I knew the others wouldn't agree, so I took matters into my own hands. Part of me knew it wouldn't work.
Shadows I'd never paid attention to before seemed to be everywhere.
Today was the day.
I found myself wandering to the roof of headquarters- the product of weeks of blueprinting, scaling, plotting, discussing. The roof I'd last stood on with someone I'd started to think was my friend.
Today, it was raining.
When I was too young to know better, I was told raindrops were angels' tears. I used to stare at the clouds from my window when it rained and wonder why the angels were sad.
Although I now knew it wasn't true, I caught myself wondering if they were crying for me.
Today, all voices seemed to sound like echoes- audible but not clear enough to make sense of. Light Yagami's voice brushed me like a breeze.
My gaze lingered briefly on him and for a moment I wondered who it was that I was standing with.
Today was the day.
My mind would not form deductions. I murmered nonsensically about church bells and weddings, not quite understanding where it was that I was getting at. Today, I was no longer L, the detective.
I stood in the rain fully human, emotions I'd buried for years surfacing and exploding around me like a tidal wave, hitting me without warning with full force. I spoke to Kira, my worst enemy, as L Lawliet, and though he had no way of knowing, this was my way of succumbing, of admitting defeat.
Today was the day.
I didn't know why I did it when the words "I'm sorry" escaped my lips. I could feel Kira melt away, and did not look up to meet the confused look that was undoubtedly upon Light's face. It was not apologizing to him as much as I was for him. For Kira. For what my challenge had pushed him to become.
A sudden ringing interrupted the moment and it was gone as though it had never occurred. Kira returned and Lawliet got off his knees, allowing L the detective to regain his composure as the inevitable drew closer. As I vainly attempted to stop it.
Today was the day.
Desperation clawed its way up my skin, dragging its friend fear along with it and hope crept by before the lightning of reality struck the building.
A blur of sounds, chaos, and panic aroused and emotion consumed me again as I cried out to the man I knew was now dead, the trust I had held in him floating confusd in the air. In that moment, Lawliet and L were one as emotion and logic battled for domination. The air was strangling me and in vain I used the last scrap of hope I had to utter a final unfinished sentence.
Today was the day.
Everything stopped and fell silent and my eyes widened with the thought that the time was here.
Today was the day.
I was falling and I couldn't stop myself. Someone was screaming.
Today was the day.
Someone caught me and my lips wouldn't move to voice my final realization.
Today was the day.
I was in Light's arms and a smile split Kira's face.
Today was the day.
Death stood above me and took me from my enemy, my friend.
Today was the day.
The thoughts and emotions stopped swirling and finally my mind was clear.
"Do I have to come?"
Death was surprised to see I was awake.
Today was the day.
He told me that most humans don't fight any more after he's taken them.
I told him I'm not like most humans.
He let me go.
Today was the day.
The sky was clear and the color of ink. Kira gazed triumphantly at the record I'd left behind.
I sat at my chair and went back to work. L the detective sat with his enemy, logic and coherent thoughts binding them. Lawliet the human sat with his friend, drinking in the sweet taste of emotion.
Today was the day.
I know Light can hear my whispers.