A/N: I had planned these events to happen over two posts but it just felt like they fitted together. I wrote a plan for this story a while ago, but yet it has gone in totally a different way. So tomorrow I need to rewrite my plan, I kind of have one in my head but it could change. Ok so Blair and Chuck had a vague conversation about why left in Chapter nine, but this chapter goes into more depth. Krazy4spike thanks for the review. His plan will become clear. Wrighthangal, she isn't Chuck biological child, and to be clear everything Blair says in this post is the truth. I will be introducing a lot more of Blair's past in the sequel (hint hint). Thanks for the review. Rauhlprincess, you know I need some Chair fluff too, next post I promise will have Chair fluff. Thank you for reviewing Svenjen I am sorry I worried you, my work just got crazy. I have started the next post so it should be that long. Thanks for the review. Pty, plently of Tabitha in this post. Thanks. Trosev thanks, I love writing Tabitha, she makes me so happy. Sandra Thanks. Silentdreamsinthisheart, thanks, your name is brilliant. Bluck2nite glad I make you smile. I have a plan for Tabitha in the sequel which I am looking forward to seeing how you will react. The fallout from this post will carry on into the next, and in these two posts we find out what happened that made Blair leave. Thanks for reviewing. Prinniegg, I had planned for that but once again, it may all change now, but his actions will be dealt with.
Right all you lovely people, I am off to bed. Read and review, and thank you all for sticking with me.
Chapter nineteen: Lessons in keeping Mom
Blair looked at the clock, it was six pm. She needed to get Tabitha her dinner before it got much later but she was avoiding Chuck. The whole meeting her mind was worrying about Chuck, and what he was up too. Was he trying to get out of the contract, or gain the whole hotel back? She rubbed her forehead, "stop it Blair, you are being a drama queen." She turned her laptop off and picked up her stuff. She turned the lights off as she left the office. She leaned on the wall and slipped her shoes off. Looking back up she saw Tabitha sitting on the couch colouring in. She scanned the lobby until she found Chuck standing with a man. He handed him something and then shook his hand. She wasn't being a drama queen anymore. He really was up to something.
She walked over to the couch and sat down beside Tabitha, "hey there, you ready for dinner?"
"Mister Chuck is going to get me dinner when he is finished."
Blair looked back over to Chuck, "do you know what he is up too?"
Tabitha shrugged, "he is probably telling that man what to do, that's his job."
Blair smiled and kissed her child on her head. She was right, this was probably some business deal that was stressing him out. She was being utterly self-involved and she had to stop. She lifted a crayon and joined Tabitha colouring in. "How about we both be very bad people and go and have ice-cream for dinner?"
Tabitha giggled, "that's crazy, and Mister Chuck isn't finished yet. He has to eat dinner too."
"Well he can come and join us later. Come on, it will be fun."
"Ok then, but tomorrow you have to eat some carrots."
Blair laughed, "You have got yourself a deal."
Blair got up and slipped her shoes on. She brought Tabitha into her office. She quickly lifted her phone and her purse. For a second she thought about texting Chuck but she quickly changed her mind. She took Tabitha by the hand and led her out of the office, "so what kind of flavour do you want?"
"Vanilla and Chocolate."
"Two flavours?" Blair exclaimed, "I suppose so, but just this once"
Blair walked through the lobby and caught sight of Chuck giving the man a cheque and then shaking his hand. The man shook Chuck's hand and left. Tabitha saw Chuck and quickly let go of Blair's hand and ran towards him. Blair sighed, and realised she couldn't avoid him right now. She walked towards Chuck.
"I am taking Tabs for some ice-cream, and I need to grab a few things."
"I'm getting two flavours."
Chuck stroked the child's hair "wow two flavours. Can you bring me a tub back?"
"Are you not coming with us?"
"I can't Miss Tabitha, I have to work. But I promise I will try to finish before you are sleeping."
Tabitha smiled, "will you read me a story tonight?"
"I would love too, you just let me know which one." Chuck smiled at the child and then looked over to Blair, "will I be able to understand the words?"
Blair laughed, "probably not, but Tabs will help you. Haven't you heard, she is a genius."
"Yeah she is", Chuck said winking at Tabitha. An awkward silence spread between the two of them. Blair bit her lip and looked up at Chuck. She was about to apologise for avoiding him when Tabitha intervened, "Mom my ice-cream."
"Right let's go", Blair smiled quickly glancing down at Tabitha before meeting Chuck's gaze once again, "can I bring you anything back?"
"No thanks, just you two go and have fun", Chuck answered leaning down to kiss Tabitha on the head. He took something out of his pocket and slipped it into Tabitha's hand and winked at her. She grinned back at him and skipped towards to door. Blair looked up at Chuck, "I won't be long, I just want to get her out of the office for a while. She knows far too much about this hotel."
"Don't worry, you girls have fun. You are off the clock now. You work too hard."
"Thanks", Blair smiled and followed Tabitha out the door. Once she was sure Chuck was out of sight, she sighed and pinched her nose. She took Tabitha's hand and led her down the street.
xXx
Blair lifted Tabitha onto a stool in the ice-cream shop. Tabitha lifted her ice-cream and smiled at Blair. The ice-cream shop was nearly empty, Blair was grateful for some peace and quiet. She took a spoonful of her ice-cream and thought for a minute, "how was school today?"
"I made a picture, I can bring it home tomorrow."
"What is it?"
"It's of my family, you, me and Mister Chuck. We are learning about our families. Mister Chuck is family isn't he?"
Blair wasn't sure how to answer that. She realised she had underestimated the attachment Tabitha had formed with Chuck. "Yeah pet, he is part of our family. Do you like him?"
"I love Mister Chuck, he is awesome."
Blair laughed, "yeah he is."
Blair looked up as the door opened to the shop. She dropped her spoon, and she was sure she was about the pass out. It was the one person she had been dreading to see since she got back to New York. She wasn't even sure what she was doing her. Carbs were her worst nightmare. Blair was so distracted she failed to hear what Tabitha had said to her.
"Mom?", Tabitha exclaimed loudly, "do you love him?"
Blair swallowed as she realised she wasn't going to be able to sneak out. Tabitha's question had drawn attention to them. She looked back at her daughter, and the reality of the question sunk in. She tried to focus but the only thing she could come up with was, "yes".
Eleanor Waldorf was looking straight at her. Blair thought she was going to throw up as Eleanor looked directly at Tabitha. Blair could see her mother do the maths in her head, and then as the penny dropped. Her mother had realised that Blair had not done what she was told. Blair looked down at her daughter, "you know that I love you more than anything right?"
"Yes, I love you too Mom."
Eleanor walked up to the table, "hello Blair, how are you?"
"I'm fine."
"Blair, where have you been? You just left."
"Left where?" Tabitha asked, "I'm Tabitha, what's your name?"
"Her name is Eleanor. Go and pick out some flavours to take back to the hotel. You can have anything you want, remember to get Chuck one too."
Tabitha did as she was told. Blair was silent until her daughter was out of earshot. She could not bring herself to take her eyes off her as she spoke, "you will not tell her who you are."
"Why didn't you tell her who I am, and why didn't you tell me you were back. I will have a room prepared for you."
"No you will not. I do not have to tell you anything. You lost that right when you told me to have an abortion. I needed help and the one person I thought would help just abandoned me."
"You were nineteen, you were too young to have a baby. I thought you would realised that if you didn't have me and Cyrus to fall back on."
"So telling me to have an abortion or else was your answer. I left because of you, you didn't believe me, you told me I was no longer your daughter and then when I was pregnant you blamed both him and Chuck."
"Blair I thought it would have been better if you had just forgotten about it."
"He raped me mother, how could I forget that." Blair spat angrily, "I only ever could be with a guy one other time and I was so drunk I didn't remember it."
"I know what Carter Baizen did was terrible but Blair I needed his father's money or my business was going to go under. I was only thinking about you. And the fact you were carrying his baby…."
"How many times, she is not his. Do you want a DNA test? Carter was smart, he used a condom so it couldn't be traced. I got pregnant after I left. I told you all this and yet you still don't believe me."
"I do believe, just I think it isn't as black and white as you claim. Maybe you needed to say no a bit clearer."
"Oh wake up Mother, when someone like Carter hears no he takes it as an challenge because he is not used to it."
"But what about Chuck's part in this? He is not so innocent."
"No, I am not having this conversation with you again. I just can't."
Blair said as Tabitha re-joined her with two tubs in her hand. "I got him two flavours. I gave him the money Mister Chuck gave me, is that right?"
"Yes, good girl."
"He is not her dad Blair, that is an important thing to remember", Eleanor said sharply
"He may not be her father, but he is her dad. He took us both in, he is putting her through school, he carries her to bed when she falls asleep on the sofa. He is her dad."
Blair took Tabitha by the hand and led her out of the shop. She blinked furiously to try and stop the tears falling. She knew Tabitha was talking but her brain could not comprehend the words. She felt like she was loosing it, and right not she had no idea what to do. Her mother had just rehashed all of her old wounds and she didn't think they were going to close this time. Once she reached the hotel she sent Tabitha straight to Chuck's office, and she rushed into hers. She closed the door and walked over to the window. Only then did she allow herself to finally give in, and the sobbing started. When it would stop, she didn't know.