"I don't want to lose you again" (5x07)
AN: This is set during Season 5, Episode 7 "Turkey For Me, Turkey For You'. I have read the synopsis for this episode, and this fanfiction is based on the synopsis. In the synopsis it says SPOILER: and I quote, "Callie hides a secret from her Moms and Mariana." Lastly, the lines in Italic are not mine, they are lines that were in the Good Trouble Season 5 Official Trailer and Jamie's proposal speech in Season 5, Episode 2 "It Was Not Your Fault But Mine".
Thanksgiving at the Coterie was going interesting, to say the least. But, honestly, that was to be expected with everyone's families present. There was bound to be friction, and apparently, there were also big life altering decisions to be made. It was the day before Thanksgiving, and Stef and Lena finally got a couple of moments to themselves. Ka'maya was playing off in the corner, and Stef and Lena were sitting on the green sofa where Callie's bed used to be when she lived at the Coterie.
"I don't know, my love. I feel like there is something off with Callie, I feel like there is something that she is keeping from us. Stef said, sitting down next to her wife watching their foster daughter play with her toys.
"I don't know either, I feel that way as well. But, I am not sure what could be wrong… Do you think her and Jamie got into a fight? Lena wondered.
"No, I feel like it's more than that. Almost like she is debating something, or withholding something from him, and I guess us as well."
"Maybe we should ask her about it." Just then, Callie and Mariana walked into their loft together. Mariana went to sit on the chair next to the couch after saying 'hi' to Ka'maya.
"Hey, Ka'maya, how's it going?" Callie asked.
"Hey Callie, it's going well. Do you want to play with me?" Ka'maya replied.
"Sure." Callie replied, making no effort to acknowledge her Moms or Mariana.
"Hey Cal, why don't you come here, Mama and I want to talk with you. You can play with her later, she is good there." Callie was dreading this. She knew what her Moms were going to ask her about. Her Moms always had a sixth sense when it came to sensing that there was something off with their children, and she knew what was going to happen. Callie reluctantly walked over to the couch, she sat next to Stef. Stef wasted no time getting into the conversation with Callie.
"Hey so Mama and I have noticed since we got here yesterday, that there is something off, what is going on, love? Can you tell us?"
Callie took a deep breath. She knew that she couldn't avoid this conversation, and honestly, there was no one better to talk to about this than her Moms.
"Umm, Jamie asked me to marry him, a couple of weeks ago. It was a few days before I came to LA to visit Mariana after the whole shooting situation." Callie said, releasing a deep breath, she was tired of hiding this secret from her Moms and Mariana, she had been hiding this since before she came to visit Mariana and it was time she told them. Stef, Lena and Mariana were a little shocked, but they were all over the moon for Callie.
"Yeah? And?" Stef said.
Callie once again took a deep breath. "I told him I need to think about it, he has been kind about it. He doesn't bring it up, even though we obviously see each other everyday. But, I don't know, I am scared. Like what if our relationship doesn't work out again, what if, what if…" Callie trailed off.
Stef and Lena both looked at each other, they both knew that no matter how much time had passed, Callie would always struggle with trusting that things can and will work out."
Callie, I know that you struggle with trust and accepting love. But, if you live your life like that, you are going to miss out on so many good things that you deserve." Stef said honestly.
"I was definitely scared when Mom and I started our relationship, she was finalizing her divorce with Mike and she had Brandon, and I had never been a mother so I was scared of those two things when we first started our relationship." Lena said, looking at Stef.
"But, I knew that I loved her and that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I never want to think about how my life would be if I didn't take that leap, I wouldn't have her and I wouldn't have you amazing kids."
"I guess love, the question is, do you love Jamie?" Stef asked.
"I do. I really do. Even when we broke up, I loved him."
"Do you trust him?" Stef asked.
"I am starting too, I mean not one hundred percent, but, after what you said, I think it is just a work in progress. But I am working on it."
"That's all you need to do."
"So honey, what do you want to do?" Lena asked.
"I think I am just going to be honest with him and tell him the truth about how I feel."
"That's our girl." Lena said.
Just then Callie's phone pinged, it was Jamie telling her that he arrived at the Coterie. Jamie had some last minute work to do for his case so he decided to get a flight this morning whereas Callie wanted to spend some extra time with her Moms, Ka'maya and Mariana.
"Hey, Jamie texted, thanks Moms, you always know what to say."
"Of course, you go talk to Jamie." Lena said.
Callie left the room to go talk to Jamie. While Stef, Lena and Mariana went to play with Ka'maya, who was lost in her toys.
"Hey Jamie." Callie said going in to give Jamie a kiss.
"Hey Callie, can we talk?" Jamie asked.
"Of course." Callie replied.
The two of them walked around the Coterie looking for somewhere private to talk. They found a little storage room.
"How about we just talk in here? Everyone's families seem to be visiting for Thanksgiving and there's nowhere to have a private conversation." Callie stated.
"Okay, that sounds good." Jamie had been sensing that something was off with Callie since he proposed and she told him that she needed to think about it. But then everything happened with Mariana and they were both busy with work so they kept putting this conversation off.
"I know that I have been distant with you since you proposed. I really truly love you and I'm so honored that you want to have a family with me and that I am your everything. But, I am scared. I have always struggled with accepting love, ever since I was put in foster care. I have felt like I am not worthy of love so I blow things up. I also have a history of blowing good things up for myself because I am scared to trust."
"Look, Callie. I know you had a hard upbringing. I know that our break up hurt you, it hurt me as well. But, I meant everything when I asked you to marry me. I realize now you weren't ready for that step. I am so sorry if I pressured you. I am glad you listened to your conscience and said you need to think about it. I will wait as long as you need. If you need to think about this. It's fine… It's just…" Jamie trailed off.
"It's just what?" Callie said on the verge of tears, she had become overly emotional about the whole situation.
"I don't want to lose you again. I love you so much. I can't imagine my life without you." Callie looked into Jamie's eyes, all she saw in his eyes was pure love for her.
"I love you, too. I really want to marry you one day. I wish I could have had the trust in you to say yes when you proposed." Callie admitted, she wanted to be truthful with Jamie.
"Well, I can always propose again." Jamie winked. Getting on one knee.
"Don't freak out. Callie, you're the love of my life, my joy, my favorite client. I've loved you since the day I met you, in your moms' backyard, and you gave me such a hard time. I want to share every sunrise and sunset with you. I want to support you in achieving your dreams. I want to have a family and grow old together. You're my heart and my soul. You're my everything. Callie Adams-Foster, will you make me the happiest man alive? Will you marry me?"
"Yes, Jamie, yes I will. Wow, that's the same speech you gave the first time you proposed."
"Well, I feel the way I felt about you the first time I proposed. I can't wait to see what the future holds for us."
"Me too. I love you so much, Jamie."
"I love you more." Jamie replied before the two of them went in for a kiss. Their first kiss as an engaged couple.
"I know Thanksgiving is tomorrow, but I just want to say, I am so thankful for you, Jamie Hunter."
"Callie Adams Foster, words can't describe how thankful I am for you". Jamie said, leaning in to kiss his fiancé.
The End