"It's gonna be our year, Rain." Eddie whispered into my ear before he danced his alcohol infused lips over mine at midnight, just as the crowd in his and Adam's apartment started to cheer and shout, "Happy New Year!" Neither of us wished anyone a happy new year, we were in our own world, wrapped together in a sweet embrace, tongues lapping over eachother. "Alright alright you two, break it up or get a room!" Adam's voice hollered over to us, and we laughed into eachothers mouths as we pulled a part. Robin immediately seized my hand and yanked me over to her and Steve, dancing by the tiny fake fireplace in the tiny living room. I blew a kiss to Eddie as I was pulled away, he reached up and caught it then stuck it in the pocket of his black leather trousers. The three of us - plus Adam because he hates spending christmas with his own family for some reason I didn't have the privilege of knowing yet - had driven back to Hawkins in my car on the 21st December for Christmas. Hawkins hadn't changed at all, and neither had anyone we loved. Eddie, Robin, Wayne, Steve, and Max joined us at my mom's house for Christmas Dinner and a games night since my aunt Karen, Ted, and Mike were spending Christmas in a cabin with Nancy, somewhere further north. Max and Robin had a rematch of twister and this time Robin won - singing her victory song all night long and drinking a little too much eggnog to curb the aching sadness in her heart left by her breakup with Vicky. The distance was too much for both of them and neither one could stand to continue hurting the other anytime plans fell through because of class schedule changes or other commitments getting in the way. On the 28th we hauled back into my car - with Steve - and left Hawkins. At first, Steve had stayed in our dorm after we very creatively snuck him in and set up a fort with our mattresses, duvets, and pillows. Then some dickwad who'd had it in for us since we arrived tattled and we got an overly harsh warning about having non-students staying with us, so Eddie came to pick him up like a little abandoned puppy and offered him the couch in Adam's apartment.

I danced with my two best friends, making utter fools of ourselves in front of the people we didn't know who were also there for the party. Every now and then I caught sight of Eddie chatting to his new found acquaintances - anytime I dared call them his friends he pulled a face and protested that Adam's friends and the people they were recording this album and playing shows with were cool, but he didn't yet feel like he belonged enough to be considered their friend. I didn't believe it for a second though - watching him laugh and joke around so easily with these people who never made him the butt of their jokes or called him a freak - I knew he belonged here, with me. Being here was the best thing for both of us, we didn't get (as many) people giving us weird looks in the streets, no psychopaths tried to break us up or assault me, Eddie had even met another group of nerds who knew almost as much as he did about DnD. I knew this was absolutely gonna be our year - Robin, Eddie, Adam and I were moving into a slightly larger apartment together this August, in a perfect location midway between campus and the recording studio where Adam's friend had told Eddie he could work as well as record anytime he wanted. He had a few shows and small tours planned out too, playing guitar for Adam, which I knew he was so fucking proud of. Truth be told, I'd been working with some of Adam's friends to put together some shows for Eddie to play solo - his own songs and his own limelight - the only problem is that costs a fuck ton of money and we're saving for an apartment! So, the plan is to work my ass off and earn as much money as I could up here, then over the summer get my old job back at family video for three months and use all the money to get those shows planned for when we returned.

"Fuck. Okay, I'm coming home. What? No, mom I'm coming, she needs me," I slammed my tiny dorm desk with my fist. "I love you too, bye mom." I closed my eyes and smacked my head down onto the desk. "Hey, what's goin on?" Eddie's hand was quickly traveling up my back, he'd sprung forward from my bed where he and Robin were watching a chick flick whilst I finished up some course work, and landed on his knees beside my chair behind my head, his face inches from mine. Robin was also immediately on her feet, alarmed and breathing heavily. I opened my eyes, head still on the desk, and told them what my mom had just said on the phone, "Max's mom died three days ago. She relapsed a week ago and went on a bender; went to go buy god knows what kind of pills from someone but didn't have the money they wanted for them so she paid in...different ways..." My voice felt thick and heavy in my throat. "Some of the fuckers dropped by the trailer whilst Max was getting ready for school, delivering more and waiting for payment. After school she found her mom's body." Robin cursed under her breath, pulling me up for a hug and then looking at Eddie, worried. Eddie tried to scoop me into his arms but I was on a mission - get to Max. I shoved past him and began throwing clothes and a few other things into a duffle bag. "Did Alice say what's happening now?" Robin croaked out, keeping out of the way as I frantically raced around our room. "Ted's helping my mom with lawyers and CPS, trying to get them to let Max stay with her long term instead of being put into the system, she has no other living relatives." Eddie's forehead creased and he caught me in his arms finally, holding me tightly and kissing my head. "Sit down - you need to catch your breath. Robin, could you finish putting their things in the bag, pack one for yourself too if you're coming. I'm gonna call Adam and cancel this week and next week, then we're gonna drive back to Hawkins tomorrow, Okay?" I pushed Eddie away enough to look at his face, "no, you can't do that. You need to go ahead with Adam and play those shows, there's some pretty impressive people coming to see you guys. If you cancel he's gonna have to get some rando to fill in and take your moment. Robin and I will go back to Hawkins for the week, maybe two if we can get the time out of classes." Robin nodded her head fiercely, "We'll totally be able to swing two weeks, its March, there's not much for us to do right now." At this Eddie raised his eyebrows, "Rain, I want to be with you, by your side. I'm coming." He pushed me down onto my bed and nodded at Robin before heading outside to the phone box to call Adam.

~Back in Hawkins~

We had driven non-stop to get back to Hawkins as quickly as possible, Eddie and I driving in shifts, eventually arriving in the early morning. Eddie gathered me into a quick hug before clambering out of the car, "Gimme a call when you can, let me know how she is." I nodded quietly and watched him head towards his trailer where Wayne was waiting by the open door. The trailer park was buzzing with whispers and people looking out of their windows, curtains twitching. Police tape blew in the wind by Max's trailer - the mark of death. Robin and I remained silent on the drive to my house. My mom opened the door wearing a smart shirt with navy pants, "Hey Raindrop," she enclosed me in her arms on the door step then pulled Robin in too, "I have to go and speak with CPS again; Ted thinks they're ready to agree that the only feasible guardian for Max is me." I kissed her cheek and said, "Sounds good, love you." When my mom left, we climbed up the stairs and stood by my bedroom door, I knew Max had been staying in my room because our shitty spare one had mould and damp everywhere, no matter how hard my mom tried to fix it throughout the years. We both stood there, neither of us knocking or moving. Robin whispered to me, "Maybe just you should go in, she's practically your sister anyway, I'll go watch TV downstairs or something." I nodded silently and knocked three times. Nothing. Entering the dark bedroom, I could just about see her shape under the covers. days worth of plates of uneaten food were scattered on the floor. I sat at the foot of the bed, touching the lump that was max's leg and felt her squirm beneath the covers. Max peeked her head out from beneath, wearing headphones which she shoved off her head when she saw me. "Rain..." was all she muttered, her face puffy and stained with tears. I climbed over and laid down next to her, pulling her head onto my chest. "I'm here Maxy" I told her, shushing her and stroking her hair. We stayed like that for a few minutes before Max muttered, "It was my fault." I snapped my head down to look at her, "it wasn't Max, you didn't make her relapse or go to those guys, or let them into the trailer. There was nothing you could've done, and you never should have had to see what you saw." I tightened my arms around her fragile frame but Max shoved herself into a sitting position. "I could've done something," she said stubbornly. Her hair was greasy and stuck to her head, she clearly hadn't showered in days and she was wearing some of my old pjs that were a little big on her. I raised an eyebrow, confused. Max threw her head back, shouting loudly "You can come up here y'know." The TV flicked off downstairs and Robin joined us in my room, standing by the desk awkwardly. I shared a questioning glance with her. Max continued, "I went back to the trailer after school to grab some things because I wanted to stay here that night instead of being there. She was lying on the kitchen floor; foaming at the mouth, tears streaming from her eyes, body flailing like she was having a seizure. I saw her, and I just stood there." I flashed my eyes to Robin, knowing both of us were feeling the same stab of anxiety in our chests. "I felt frozen but also like my body was on fire, it felt like forever. She looked at me and tried reaching out for me. She asked for my help...I just stood there. She said she was sorry, then she stopped. It all stopped." I reached out to pull her in for a hug, but she jumped up and turned towards the curtains. I stood by Robin, wanting to give Max the space she needed. "I should've helped her as soon as I got back. I should've called 911, or ran to Wayne or someone around. I should've fucking done CPR or put my fingers down her throat or something. I could have done that. But I didn't. I think maybe I didn't want to. Maybe I wanted her to die." Max whispered.

~ The Funeral ~

Robin zipped her jacket as I stood on my tiptoes helping Eddie with his tie. We all froze as Max began walking down the stairs. "You ready?" Eddie asked and Max nodded once. It had been 8 days since we came back to Hawkins, and 13 since Max's mom had died. Today was the funeral and tomorrow Robin, Eddie and I were returning to Canada, unable to get more time out of classes after all. My mom rounded the corner from the kitchen, and laid her hand on Max's shoulder, "I'm right behind you honey." Robin and I filed out of my house, followed by Max, Eddie, and my mom. It was a rainy day for a funeral, and we got soaked in the cemetery, but I doubt many of us felt it. We stood closely with the whole hawkins gang, but Max distanced herself from us all. The service was short and simple; Max gave a eulogy and read a poem that she dedicated to her mom. "I'm gonna be okay mom. The Wheelers have been helping me, and Alice will look after me. Its okay now." Max's voice shook as she finished. I ran to her aftwewards and gripped her tight, stroking her long ginger hair as I hugged her. "I'm so sorry I have to leave tomorrow - turns out doing arty shit in college doesn't mean you can slack off at all, the tutors are pretty fucking harsh. Call me at any time, seriously I don't care what time it is." Max nodded her head, keeping her eyes on her mom's grave, avoiding eye contact with Mike, Lucas, and Dustin. "We'll be back when summer starts, but if anything happens and you need me here sooner, just-" Max cut me off, "call. I know. Its okay." We climbed into my mom's car, and Max leaned her head on my shoulder for the whole journey home.

As my mom held me close to her before Robin and I left the next morning, Max still sleeping, I whispered into her ear, "Tell Mike and Dustin and Lucas they need to be there for her, even when she pushes them away. Tell them to call me the second she needs me." My mom kissed my forehead and smiled, which told me she understood. She turned to Robin for a long hug and finally hugged Eddie, resting her hand on his pale cheek and saying, "I know it's been rough this week but I've been meaning to tell you how proud I am of you - sounds like you're really doing well out there." Eddie blushed and kissed her cheek, "Thanks Alice, We'll see you soon. give Max a hug for me."