I know, I know. I know that you would like to get rid of Tim and Maya. But as this fandom has taught… Things should not be rushed (*cries internally). So… Like I said, trust the process ;)

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She cared about her boyfriend.

She really did.

But still…

It was not the same.

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While waiting for the ambulance, Olivia and Elliot had explained everything once more to Cragen, whose eyes had widened in surprise. Fin had told about the murderer he shot, Olivia had told about the pile of dead bodies in the basement of the cabin, and Cragen had had to rub his face for a while before he had started giving orders.

He had sent Fin and Munch to watch over the body and wait for the internal investigation. He had ordered Olivia and Elliot to go with him to the park rangers and asked them to point out the cabin on a huge terrain map covering the entire national park. He himself had dug the phone out of his pocket and started a round of calls.

Olivia looked at the map, tried to find the cabin, but after a moment she had to admit to herself that she had no idea where it was. Frustrated, she turned her gaze to her partner who had a focused look on his face.

"Do you remember the route to where we met? I might be wrong, but as far as I remember, I didn't have time to run very far."

"There are a few old, uninhabited cabins in this area," the park ranger told. "Could you describe the appearance of it?"

And Olivia tried to remember, but soon realized that she had never seen the cabin from the outside. She had woken up inside it, and when she had escaped, she had run without looking back. The memories made her shudder though, and she shook her head.

"No, I'm sorry. I only saw it from the inside," she replied quietly. "It was small, and it had a basement."

"A basement?" The park ranger looked intently at the map. "It could be..." She scratched her chin and was silent for a moment before continuing: "In the middle of the park, in a very isolated place, there is one cabin that, as far as I know, no one has used in ages. There is no proper path to the cabin, and if you don't know about it, you won't accidentally get lost there either. We have checked it several times when we have been informed about missing hikers, but we have not found anything there."

"Olivia, are you sure you didn't just imagine those bodies"? Tim's voice made them all turn their heads in his direction. "I mean… You had hit your head, and he had locked you in a dark basement, anyone can start seeing all kinds of things in those circumstances."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Elliot tensing next to her, and imperceptibly she touched his clenched hand, as a reassurance, but also a warning.

"I know what I smelled," she said in a low, firm voice. "So, you can stop that before you even start."

Tim raised his hands. "Okay, sorry. I was just… Thinking…"

And that's when anger flared up inside Olivia.

"What? You don't believe me?!"

"No, no, I didn't mean that!" He took a step back and quickly glanced at her partner standing next to her, whose body language didn't exactly seem to inspire confidence in him. "Of course I believe you. It just sounds so… Unbelievable."

"Welcome to our world," Elliot beside her snorted before turning back to look at the map, and Tim seemed to regain his confidence.

"What did that mean?"

But Olivia only watched him for a moment, anger turning to sadness, and she lightly shook her head.

"Nothing. Just… Nothing."

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When Olivia was laying in the hospital bed a few hours later, IV needle in her hand, she felt more tired than ever before.

When the ambulance had arrived at the parking lot near the campsite, Cragen himself had gone with them to make sure Olivia and Elliot got on it. The local police were coming to check the cabin, Fin had needed to give a statement, and there was nothing more for them to do on the spot. They had done everything they could, and it had been more important that they received medical treatment.

The ambulance ride had been very quiet. Elliot had closed his eyes at the beginning of the trip, and Tim had sat next to her, his arms stubbornly around her the whole time. As such, his proximity hadn't bothered Olivia, but his constant physical contact had made her crave space more and more. She had also been very tired despite having slept soundly all night, but for some reason sleep had just circled her, never reaching her. From under her half-open lids, she had been watching her partner, and the wish that she could lean against him had flashed through her mind, but she had suppressed it.

She was allowed to lean against her boyfriend, and that had to be enough.

After the medical examination, she still had to wait for the results of the remaining blood tests, and since she had been so cold, she had been given a room and a bed. In addition, she had suffered from dehydration, which is why she had received a drip in her vein.

She hadn't seen Elliot since he'd been called into a different room to be examined. Tim, on the other hand, had followed her like a puppy, and she had asked him to get some coffee because she had wanted some peace for a moment. She closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh, but then there was a knock at the door, and she groaned.

Is even half an hour of solitude too much to ask?

"Liv?"

But a voice from the doorway made her open her eyes, and suddenly her longing for peace was gone. Elliot looked around the room uncertainly and then entered, closing the door quietly behind him.

"Hey," Olivia sat up. "Everything ok?"

"Yeah," her partner replied, eyes locking on her IV bag. "What's this?"

She raised one eyebrow and chuckled. "You haven't seen anything like this before?" But before he could answer, she waved her hand dismissively. "Don't worry, nothing serious. Just a little dehydration, and the bleeding didn't help it."

His face relaxed visibly. "Good. Uh… Where's Tim?"

"Getting us some coffee. I... I wanted to be alone for a minute."

"Oh, okay," Elliot scratched his forehead. "So… I got permission to go home, so… Um… See you at work?"

He grabbed the doorknob, and suddenly Olivia wanted to stop him. She didn't want him to leave, she didn't want to let go of him, she didn't want it all to end.

"El, wait."

Her partner stopped, looked at her questioningly, and she got off the bed, careful not to tear the IV in her hand, and walked over to him. And then she wrapped her arms around him, pressed her cheek against his chest, and closed her eyes. His body was warm, strong, and when she felt his arms around her, she tightened her grip, tears burning in the corners of her eyes as she muttered:

"Thank you."

"You are my partner," Elliot answered quietly, his chin pressed against her head. "And I'd do anything for you."

"I…" Olivia was about to answer, but then the door next to them opened, and Tim walked into the room, holding two coffee cups, making them pull apart.

"Uh… Sorry to interrupt, but coffee was ordered here," he stopped next to them, and Elliot pursed his lips.

"See ya," he said quietly as he passed Tim, who followed him with his eyes, and then he was gone. And the moment the door closed, Olivia would have wanted to run after him, but despite the desperate plea of her body, of her heart, she took the cup of coffee from her boyfriend and sat down on the bed.

"What was that?" He asked, and she closed her eyes, hoping her boyfriend would let it go because she didn't have an ounce of energy to argue.

"What was what?"

"That hug," he insisted, and she opened her eyes to sip her coffee. "Seemed pretty intense to me. Did something happen between you in the woods?"

If you only knew…

"So, now I can't hug my partner?" She asked irritably, the desire to be alone returning to her before she could even think about it.

"I didn't say that."

"Yes, you did," Olivia sighed and closed her eyes. "Can we talk about this later? I just want to sleep now."

Tim's shoulders slumped as he nodded and sat next to her bed. Then he raised his hand to her cheek and stroked lightly, but for some reason Olivia would have wanted to turn her head away.

What is wrong with me?

"I'm sorry," he replied as he lowered his hand and took her hand in his. "You rest, I'll keep an eye on everything."

Keep eye on what exactly?

But she answered nothing, just let sleep creep into her body and lighten the weight in her heart.

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Olivia was able to leave the hospital in the evening.

Everything had been ok, and the doctor had said she had been lucky. The wound was not inflamed and had healed well, so it had only needed taping. Otherwise, she had passed all the blood tests.

Tim had driven them home, and peace had washed over her body as she had seen the New York lights on the horizon. She was home.

But when they had climbed the stairs, and Olivia had opened the door to her apartment, suddenly the peace inside her had disappeared. As if some invisible force had resisted her entering her apartment, and only her boyfriend waiting behind her had made her force her feet to move. The door had closed, Tim had carefully locked it, and a growing discomfort, an anxiety, had begun to swirl within her.

They had eaten dinner, watched TV, taken a shower, brushed their teeth, and finally they had crawled into bed. Everything had been fine until Tim had turned off the lights. Darkness had descended on the bedroom, her boyfriend's arm had wrapped around her as he had pulled her in for a kiss, and her heart rate had started to pick up.

And certainly not in a good way.

She didn't understand what was going on. She was at home, safe, with her boyfriend, but her body mostly seemed like she was in some kind of danger. Eventually, Tim had noticed it too, and he quietly asked:

"Are you okay? You are trembling."

"Yeah, yeah, it's just... Adrenaline is just dissipating," she answered indifferently, even though anxiety was squeezing her throat. Tim was quiet for a moment, but then pulled her closer to him and pressed a kiss to the back of her neck.

"If I can make you feel better in any way, just say it."

"No, it's okay."

Because she knew. She knew there was only one thing that would help her. The one thing whose embrace had caused peace to settle inside her in a way she couldn't understand.

But he wasn't there.

"Okay," Tim answered in the dark as he buried his face in her neck, his hand slid under her shirt, and he sighed lightly.

He fell asleep quickly, but Olivia didn't. She lay motionless in their bed, in her boyfriend's arms, listened to the sounds of the traffic, trying to calm her beating heart and trembling body.

And as she squeezed her eyes shut, a tear rolled down her cheek.