So I'm in a hotel room in Alabama on my way home after a week in North Carolina visiting my very large extended family. I wrote this last night at my grandma's house but she doesn't have Internet. Be glad I even wrote it - sometimes when there's no internet I forget my computer even works.

A few updates: Raven is done. Can of Worms will follow eventually.

They have so many nice Southern chain restaurants that I don't have where I live.

Baby spit isn't as cute as an actual baby. Especially if it's on your pant leg.

And granddaddy will eat everything sugary he can find even though he is not supposed to.

Back to the story.

I just suddenly thought of this idea and I thought it would be funny. I'm not going to continue it, but someone can if they want. So, status: Adoptable

"Dad, why are we doing this?" Dash Baxter asked his father as he picked out an outfit for himself. He hated special occasions that he had to dress up for, and even though tonight was not one of those events, his father still made him select an outfit that was more formal than he normally wore.

"Because, son," even a newcomer would recognize Alan Baxter's tone, the one of a man who had explained something over and over many times before, "Wendy is important to me. She invited us to her family reunion so she can introduce us, and I want to make a good impression."

"Why are they even having a reunion? I hear they all live in town."

"A couple of people come in from out of town every now and then, and they try to get together when that happens. Also, there's a stain on that shirt, get a clean one."

Dash rifled through his closet, tossing unnoticed disdainful looks at his father, who was standing in the doorway, already dressed and prepared to leave. Only when the doorbell rang did he turn a blind eye to his son.

Dash narrowed his eyes at nothing when he heard Wendy's voice. His mother and father had been divorced for a little over a year and here was this woman shoving her way into his and his father's lives. Dash knew Wendy made his father happy, but he just couldn't stand her. She wasn't mean, she didn't yell, she wasn't boring, but Dash just didn't like her. He couldn't understand it, but there were a lot of things Dash Baxter didn't understand, so he just went with it.

"Dash, are you ready now?" Alan's voice carried through the house. Dash sighed and threw something on. Why should he impress these people? If there were kids, he wouldn't need to. He was Dash Baxter, they would already be impressed.

Dash silently walked out the door with his father and Wendy, got in the car with his father and Wendy, and drove to the restaurant with his father and Wendy. He didn't like that he had to attach her name to everything they did just because she happened to exist.

Dash knew the entire restaurant had been reserved for family, but when they arrived Dash was sure the place was open to everyone. There were so many people. Was this mess Wendy's family or had they forgotten to reserve the place entirely?

"Wendy!" A perky blonde woman greeted his father's – ugh – female friend with a smile and a hug. "Glad you could make it! Ooh, is this Alan?"

"It sure is, and his son Dash," Wendy put her hand on Dash's back and pushed him forward to greet the blonde woman. She smiled a pearly white smile and held out her hand. Dash just frowned. The woman's smile flickered.

"Well…" She fumbled for words, "he's…charming."

"Sorry, uhm…" Dash's father began, trailing off.

"Jill," the blond woman filled in the blank for him. Unlike his son, Alan shook her hand politely.

"Jill. I guess he's not in the mood for manners today."

"Oh well, one bit of my sister-in-law's cookies with clear that gloom right up! Come on in and have a seat anywhere you like."

Dash decided to scout the dining room. He saw plenty of adults chatting, but what struck him the most was how many kids there were. They were everywhere. There were babies and toddlers and older kids and teens and—

Wait.

Dash looked harder into the crowd and he saw him. He had a baby boy on his lap and was talking to another girl his age. Dash panicked and looked up at the banner in the restaurant.

"Fenton Family Reunion"

When Dash looked back at where he had previously been gazing, he met a bright blue and equally horrified stare.

Danny Fenton was related to his father's girlfriend.

Oh shit.

GET OUT NOW OR BE A FENTON FOREVER

Wendy and Jill are two of my actual aunts' names.