He couldn't believe his luck today.
Not only did his doctor inform him that his cancer was likely in remission but now Olivia asked to meet him at the bar. Granted, it was about something work related but the thought of seeing her in any regard made something flutter in his chest.
Seeing her shoulder her way through the crowd at the entryway, he pushed off of the bar to meet her in the middle. "Sergeant, we have to stop meeting like this." He greeted, a teasing tone tilting his gravelly voice.
"Amaro has not interest protecting his father." She stated, practically cutting him off. "He is not trying to fix this."
On any other day, her curt tone would take the wind out of his sails but he was too distracted by the way she looked, standing just within reach of him. She looked soft. There was no other way to describe it.
Her silky, chestnut hair fell just past her shoulders and the minimal make-up she wore made her glow in the warm light of the bar. "All right, so much for small talk." He began, trying his best to hide his disappointment. He let his eyes linger over her mesmerizing features before her bright eyes drew his back. It was wild how she was so familiar and so different all the same time. "But since you're asking, I'd hate to be him right now."
Olivia rolled her eyes and her head at the same time in a mocking gesture that made his chest swell. She was so goddamn cute. He continued what he was saying before she wiped all thought from his brain. "Either he testifies against his father which is barbaric or it looks like he's conspiring to cover up a crime. Almost feel sorry for him."
A look a surprise crossed her face and he couldn't tell if it was genuine or one rooted in sarcasm. She was such a familiar presence with an air of mystery that whipped around her. She was comforting and refreshing, making him ache for the past and yearn for the future all at the same time. "Wow. Getting soft in your old age." She poked.
"Maybe", he yielded as he adverted his eyes, distracted by someone brushing past them in the narrow bar. He took the opportunity to take a step closer to her.
A boldness washed over him. He didn't know if it was from his new lease on life or the way being around her made him transport back to all those years ago. He couldn't pretend like being around her didn't set his soul a flame, he didn't want to anymore. "So are we just gonna stand here talking about Amaro or are you gonna let me buy you a drink?"
Ed's blue eyes flickered up to hers just in time to see her eyebrows raise in surprise. Shock morphed into pleasant intrigue as a small smile spread across her lips. "How's the wine here?"
A warmth washed over him as he practically watched the wall she built up begin to come down, brick by brick. A cocky smirk pulled up one side of his mouth and a mischief glinted in his bright eyes. "I think you should try the bourbon."
The sound of her laugh.
It lit something off inside of him. It boomed and beamed and still managed to captivate him after all this time.
Sometimes she threw her head back with glee and the way her throat bobbed made him grind his molars with restraint. Other times she almost folded into herself, head down, hair falling in her face and her nose scrunching in a way that made his heart clench. Either way, he was an absolute goner.
Maybe it was the bourbon warming his belly or the soft light that made her brown eyes dance but right then, in this random bar he fell in love with Olivia Benson all over again.
Or at the very least, realized he had never stopped.
As her laughter weened, she took a generous sip of her second bourbon as she eyed him warily. "What's with you tonight, Tucker? You're practically glowing. It's freaking me out."
Shrugging one shoulder, he looked down at where his fingers were twirling his sweating glass of club soda. One bourbon was enough for him, he was drunk on her. "Just got some good news today."
Her features lifted with curiosity. "Cryptic", she hummed with an air of interest. "Care to share with the class?"
A soft smirk spread across his thin lips and her answer was a slow shake of his head before he pivoted. "How's Noah?"
The way her face lit up at the mentioned of her son was the most endearing he had ever seen her and there was some serious competition. "He's perfect." she beamed as she looked up at him from her drink. "Winter's tough with his lungs so I'm just a tad more hyper vigilant but he's a sponge, absorbing so much and growing so fast. Too fast."
His smiles matched hers, he couldn't help it. She just radiated when she spoke of her son, motherhood looked so so good on her. "Is it weird that I kind of miss him?"
"Not at all", she responded without missing a beat. "I miss him literally all the time. He could be in the next room sleeping and I miss him." She laughed at how ridiculous she sounded but it was contagious because a chuckle rose in his throat too.
"You're a good mom." He observed, admiration dancing in his blue eyes. "Always knew you would be. I'm glad it happened for you."
The smile that lit up her face made her bright eyes crinkle in the corners. "Me too. Doing it alone is a lot, always hoped I would have a partner but I'm happy."
Her words hit him square in the gut. He didn't know what struck him more; her yearning for a partner the way he yearned for her or the admission that she was happy without him.
Taking a sip of his bubbly drink, he cleared his throat before sucking his teeth in a bid to buy time. "Listen, all those thing aren't necessarily linear. Not anymore at least. You'll find someone."
The smile in her eyes was replaced by uncertainty and apprehension as she looked down to where her fingers fiddled against her glass. "You sound so sure."
Dropping his head, he caught her eye as he looked at her from under his brow. "As someone who knows how easy you are to love, there is no doubt in my mind."
She couldn't help the way her breath caught in her chest but she didn't drop his gaze. She cleared her throat. "Y-you loved me?"
Sucking his teeth, he bought himself time as he mulled over his response. "I didn't really realize it at the time but hindsight is 20/20. You consumed every corner of my mind at any given minute. What else would you call that?"
Despite the way her heart was pounding against her ribcage, she tried her best to appear unfazed as she brought the glass to her lips. "What, uh, what kind of things did you think about?" Olivia knew she was treading dangerous waters but the bourbon coursing through her veins and the feeling of Ed's hot blue eyes searing into her gave her courage.
Rubbing the back of his neck, he puffed out a timid laugh as he gathered his thoughts. "Mostly normal things. Places I wanted to take you, what our future could've looked like together." As the words left his mouth, he couldn't help it notice the way her heavy-lidded eyes caressed the lines of his face, lingering on his lips.
Even though it had been years since he had seen it, the look that had taken over her face was not foreign to him. A confidence swelled in his chest and his tongue peeked out to wet his lips before he continued, his voice a low rumble. "The look on your face when I pushed in…", he trailed off, his eyes falling to where her parted lips sucked in a shaky breath.
They stayed like that for what felt like a lifetime. The only thing threatening to tear his gaze away from her decadent brown eyes was her heaving chest. A heated flush traveled across his skin like a scorching wildfire making him hyper aware of every single nerve ending.
Tossing back the rest of her bourbon, she held the sweating glass to her overheated throat. She kept her eyes closed, willing the tumbler to cool her fevered skin and he took the opportunity to let his eyes fall. Along her jaw, down her neck, to the sliver of exposed cleavage. His mouth flooded as the memory of the way her skin tasted invaded his senses.
The sound of her phone chiming tore them both from the spell they were under. She let out a heavy sigh when she read the message. "I need to head out, my sitter needs to get home." She explained as her eyes met his sympathetically, the flush that rose along her neck still evident.
He nodded and gave her an understanding smile. "Let me take you home."
The feeling of being on the back of Ed's motorcycle again was indescribable. During their few months together, he took her out on it as much as the weather would allow. She had forgotten what a thrill it was. Not just the speed and the wind whipping around her but the way his hard body pressed firmly against her body enhanced the vibrating bike between her legs.
Pulling up at a stoplight just around the corner from her apartment, Ed placed both feet on the asphalt to balance them as the bike idled under them. Her heart dropped when she realized their time together was nearing an end and her arms tightened around his torso involuntarily.
With one hand still holding the handlebar steady, he reached the other down and squeezed her calf gently where it was perched on the side of the bike. The small gesture sent waves of nostalgia washing over her, it was something he did almost every time they rode on this bike together and even after all these years, it's never lost its effect.
When the light turned green, he gave her calf one last caress with his thumb before revving the engine and accelerating around the corner. She tried to make of point of savoring it all. The heat of his back against her chest, the cool air whipping around them sending his smokey, woodsy scent invading her senses.
The bike came to a slow stop in front of her building and he cut the engine, the sudden silence filling her ears more than the motor had. He reached his hand out and she accepted it as she maneuvered off the bike.
Securing the kickstand, he turned back to her and was surprised to see she had already removed her borrowed helmet. She pressed her lips together, stifling a chuckle as she handed him back the headgear.
"You got it undone." He observed, amusement twinkling in his eyes.
The extra helmet he kept on his bike, her helmet when they dated, had two D rings and a strap instead of a buckle. It gave her issue at first but she had figured out the fasten fairly quickly but let him believe she struggled with it so he would help her. She loved the way his blue eyes focused and the gentleness with which his fingers worked. It gave her an extra chance to admire his handsome face, something she could never pass up.
Giving him a sly smile, she looked up at him from under her eyelashes as he came to the realization. "You could do it the whole time, couldn't you?"
She shrugged. "You do it better."
Huffing a low chuckle, he felt his chest squeeze with her playfulness and he secured the extra helmet to the bike. "Listen, uh, please tell me if I'm reading too much into this…", he trailed off, cautiously turning his attention back to her.
Taking a step closer to him, she was standing a couple of inches taller than him considering he was still on his bike and she was perched on the curb. She placed a soft hand against his rugged cheek as her face neared his recklessly. "You're not." She assured before pressing her plump lips against the corner of his.
A large hand circled her hip and tightened around her as he sucked a sharp breath through his nose. The effect she had on him as strong as it had always been.
Pulling back just a few inches, she gave him a small smile as his eyelids fluttered open. His eyes came into focus on her face, sweet and flushed, the faintest pink coloring her cheeks.
It surprised him how quickly he fell back into the mindset of being around her again, their muscle memory returning intimately and immediately. He didn't think twice about leaning in and brushing his lips just under her ear, against the hinge of her jaw. A spot that he remembered being her favorite.
Their bodies were so closed that he felt the hitch in her chest. "Goodnight, Sergeant." He exhaled, his hot breath expelling down her neck.
After a beat, she managed to tear herself away from him and watched a handsome smirk grace his face before her snapped down the front visor of his helmet. She stood there, goosebumps still littering her skin, watching him leave and for the first time in a long time, wishing he would come back.