She ran, the crispy air of New York lashing against her bare skin. She turned heads, but this time not just because of her beauty. People stared at her thin body only covered in a skimpy slip-on, her bare feet slapping the hard concrete. They hurt; she had probably cut her delicate soles, but the pain wasn't nearly as bad as the one inside her, the one inside her heart.

She didn't want to think just yet. She preferred it when her mind was as numb as her body, so she allowed the cold to take over, control her, make her forget for the briefest of seconds, and then bring her back to the unbearable sorrow she felt. Then she'd forget again, and so it went back and forth, torturing her. A sick game.

It was as if her feet were on autopilot. She knew where she was going even before her brain managed to think it. The next safest place. She entered the well-known doorway, and climbed the familiar steps. In her mind, she heard the ring of the elevator long before it actually rang. The bright red digital numbers kept going up and up, but they couldn't go fast enough. She looked in the mirror, and shuddered at the sight; pale face, hollow eyes, a broken heart. What had she become?

The doors opened, and she walked out, wishing she at least had a shred of luck left with her. It wasn't early or late, so the person she was looking for shouldn't have been there, but Serena hoped it was different just this once. She ran up the stairs to the bedroom, noticing her dirty footprints stained the polished marble. She cared, but not enough to stop. She repeatedly knocked on the wooden planks of the door, her knuckles hurting as they hit against the surface.

'Blair, are you in there?' she asked after seconds of silence. 'Please, Blair, it's me.' With the last words, she could feel her knees thaw from the heat of the penthouse, her legs unstable. She was about to collapse underneath the suddenly great weight of her upper body, but the door opened, and instead, she fell in her friends' arms.

'S, are you okay? What happened?' she asked frantically, as Serena allowed everything she managed to control until then flow out of her. Tears, sobs, pain, they seemed to seep out of her system, yet there would be a never-ending source, causing more and more of them. 'Dorota, get me a change of clothes and tea, fast,' she shouted at the confused maid, who had come to inspect what all the noise was.

'Gosh, you're freezing,' Blair muttered, as she wrapped the thick robe over Serena's dry pyjamas. Then, she didn't hesitate to wrap her arms around the shaking body of her best friend. 'S, talk to me. What's wrong?'

She felt Serena's head shake against her side, as they both laid on the bed, so she stroked her hair, and rubbed her arms, and comforted her, until the tears finally dried, and the sobs ceased. Of course she was curious, it was in her nature to be, but she had to be her best friend first, and nothing was more important to her at that moment.

'I messed up, B,' she finally spoke, the words barely audible. 'I did it again. He'll never forgive me now.'

Typical. 'Is this about Dan?' Why was she asking? She already knew the answer to that. The only times Serena had been so upset were when Dan was involved in some way or the other. And that was one of the main things on the 'I hate Dan Humphrey' list.

But the weak nod of Serena's head confirmed it. 'S, please don't mind me saying this, but Dan would move mountains for you. He's far too in love with you to let you go again. I'm sure whatever you are fighting about now is just a passing phase.'

'No, B, maybe not this time. I know I'm making it hard for him to understand, but I just wish he would trust me and support me, even if he doesn't empathize with my decisions. We keep tripping over the same new obstacle, over and over, and that is a lack of faith in each other. And it hurts, B, it kills me, because I love him. And he loves me. And it makes no sense to experience this sense of distrust when we feel so strongly about one another.'

'Maybe that's because you got back together so suddenly, you didn't have a chance to talk things through. To commit and express it. Maybe you were so wound up in the heat of the moment, you put all of the 'administrational' aspects of your relationship to the back of your minds. But that was fine for the short-term, and this argument is just a sign that you have to sort some things out.'

'I really hope you're right. I don't want to live without him, B. I've finally chosen, and I chose him. It's always been him.'

'I know,' Blair whispered, and kissed the top of Serena's head, soothingly. 'Now tell me, why aren't you having this fight with him on your romantic getaway to 'Poorsville, Nowhereland'?'

'Well, once Ben showed up, everything got so messed up, we postponed it...'

'Wait, what? Who's Ben?'

Serena swallowed nothing when she realised she blurted something Blair didn't know. So she explained everything, leaving nothing out. Blair was her sister, and Serena realised that the only way she could help was if she knew all the details.

It had gotten dark, but the stars were shadowed by thick blankets of clouds. She couldn't remember what date it was, but the fact that it wasn't snowing just yet led her to think it couldn't be much later than she suspected. She allowed Blair to grasp every word she had muttered, and while that happened, she couldn't stop thinking about him. About where he was, what he was doing; worse, what was he thinking? She wanted answers only he could give. Something startled them both. A knock, and Dorota's head through the door.

'Miss Blair, there is visitor downstairs. He says it's urgent.' Her voice seemed unaffected, but the expression in her eyes hinted that there was something more.

'Coming,' Blair said, and kissed Serena's cheek before leaving the room swiftly.

Serena appreciated the quiet. She allowed her head to fall back on one of the pillows, the soft satin caressing the back of her neck. She rolled onto one side, her knees dug into her chest, and she closed her eyes, images of him playing before them. She was just about to fall asleep, when Blair shook her shoulder, urging her to get up.

'Come quickly, S. Hurry,' she nagged, and, robotically, Serena did what was asked of her without question. Her eyes were half closed as they rushed down the stairs, but as soon as her feet touched flatter ground, she shut them fully, not wanting to care about anything else.

'Just tell him what you told me. Assure him he's the only one for you. 'Cause there is no one else for him,' Blair whispered in Serena's ear, and then suddenly disappeared from her side. Confused at what had just happened, she opened her eyes, and once she focused them, she saw him.

He stood, coat buttoned, scarf around his neck. The tips of his ears and nose were a dark shade of pink from the cold, and only briefly she remembered evenings when she would kiss them to warm them up. She didn't know whether she wanted to move or not, but it seemed she wasn't in control anymore. There was tension between them; she could feel it. But there was something in his eyes that pulled her in, telling her it was okay to come closer to him, hold him. So she walked, speedily, and as she got nearer to him, his arms opened wider and wider. She stood before him, feeling his hands press against her back, pushing her closer to his chest. Her palms rested on his cheeks, the chilly surface not bothering her. It was as if nothing had happened, yet they both knew that wasn't true. But they would deal with that later. For then, all they needed was a single moment of the other's presence and nothing else. No words, no arguments, no cries.

'You're cold,' she finally muttered, rubbing her thumb backwards and forwards across his cheek.

'Well, it is December, and I did run around the whole city looking for you. I should have known you were at Blair's.'

'I'm sorry,' she said, almost instinctively.

'No, don't apologise. I should, though. I had no reason not to trust you. I allowed my jealousy to take over reason, and...I was stupid.'

'God, Dan, I've acted so unfairly towards you, I've said so many painful things, yet, as always, you forgive me once again. You're the one to apologize, even if you shouldn't, you're the one to patch things up. I just need to know, why would you?'

'Because you and I are forever, remember? Only I've decided that forever with you is not long enough for me, so I'm not going to waste it arguing, when there are so many other things that we could do.'

She smiled, tears gathering at the corners of her eyes, on the edge of falling. She desperately wanted to lean in, kiss him, just once, just for a minute. But she had one more thing to say, one more thing to clarify, something he should have known.

'I just need you to understand that when I'm so keen on helping Ben, it's not because I feel something for him, but more because I feel that I owe him something. Before anything else happens, I just need you to know that, for me, you're it. There is no one else, and there never really was. If you don't believe that, then I'm not sure what we're doing.' She looked away as she spoke; she was too embarrassed to face him, yet, for the first time that day, she said exactly what she wanted to say. It was time to speak the truth, lay it all out on the table, so that they never had to go through it all ever again.

He lifted one hand to smooth the side of her cheek with the back of it. As he looked in her eyes, he smiled, the beautiful smile that won her over every time.

'Do you want an answer to that question, or is it enough if I just kissed you?' he asked, but before she had the chance to reply, he pressed his lips against hers, silencing her.

'Dan,' she whispered against his mouth, trying to resist the temptation to succumb to his touch. Somehow, she preferred the worded answer. Why, she wasn't sure.

He stopped. He would never force himself on her, but he knew the only reason she pulled away was because she was scared. And he wished she could see she had no reason to be.

'I want you to answer my question.' His face changed, became harder, more serious. Was he upset? She hoped not, or, at least, not too upset. She hoped he would understand. Because she could justify her request. Almost. 'Sorry,' she muttered, looking away, but still waiting for him to speak.

He lifted her chin with his finger, joining her eyes with his. She saw that, although his expression changed, his smile was still there, folded in the creases from the corners of his eyes.

'It's okay,' he encouraged, trying to lift her spirits, her confidence, bit by bit. He wasn't aware that he was succeeding.

He took her hand in his, their fingers automatically interlocking.

'Serena. The reason I was so jealous of Ben, and your past with him, was because I love you. The reason I looked for you today throughout the whole of this city was because I knew my lack of trust really hurt you, because you love me, too.'

'I really do,' she whispered.

'I know.'

'Good,' she said, and leaned her head against his chest. He engulfed her in his arms, bending his head to touch his lips to the top of her head. She lifted her chin, and their mouths met again in a fiery kiss.

'Okay,' Blair's voice interrupted their moment, the socialite's svelte form appearing from around the corner. 'That's enough PDA for my house. Continue it in your own.'

Serena hid her face in his chest again, laughing softly with him. But while she wasn't looking, or paying any attention, as she was distracted by his strong hold on her, Dan whispered something to Blair.

'Thank Dorota for the call,' he said while stroking the blond strands he used to dream about seeing.

'She does follow orders well,' she mentioned with a knowing smile. 'Now, seriously, you two. Scram!' she ordered.

Serena walked over to her best friend and wrapped her arms around Blair.

'Thank you for being here,' she muttered, then kissed her cheek.

'Of course,' Blair replied. 'I'll see you later, okay?'

'Bye, B,' Serena said and skipped towards Dan. 'Let's go.'

His confused face baffled her. 'Sweetheart, you know I never disagree with you when it comes to fashion, but are you sure you want to walk out of here in that?' He could barely contain his laughter when she understood what he was referring to.

Blair giggled. 'Just take one of my coats and pairs of boots. I want them back, though. Don't abduct them, like you did with my Michel Perrys.'

'I won't,' she shouted back, and opened the large double doors to the coat room.