Gale's POV
Katniss curls against me as we fight for space in the cramped train bed, both of us attempting to get some rest before we arrive in District Four the next morning. I can tell that she's asleep, however fitfully. I, on the other hand, am wide awake. It's past two in the morning, but I can't seem to shut my mind off long enough to drift to sleep. I look down at her and watch her eyelids flutter. I can't help thinking how pleased I am that she is here laying next to me, regardless of how tight the space is in this tiny bed.
Turning away and propping my hands behind my head, I give in to my roiling mind and let my thoughts take over. I'm worried about Katniss. More specifically, I'm worried about what I'm keeping from Katniss. I have no doubt that she's going to find out that Blaze wants her on this mission too. And then she's going to kill me. I can tell that she's already suspicious. She wants to think that I don't know her that well anymore, but I can read every thought going through her head. Hell, half of the time I know what she's thinking before she does. Yesterday afternoon, I know she wanted to ask me about the mission. I was able to take her mind off of it for a bit, but if I know Katniss (and I do), she's not only thought about it a hundred times since then, she'll also investigate once we get to Command.
Annie is my only hope. If Annie can distract her, then Katniss will be more preoccupied with that situation than the one going on in Command. It's unfortunate that I don't know Annie better. If I were more familiar with her, perhaps I would feel comfortable talking to her about my predicament. However, I don't. So now I just have to depend on the fact that Katniss will feel obligated to wait on Annie and the baby hand and foot.
Katniss shifts against me again. I can tell she's uncomfortable, so I decide to give her space and get up for a while. It's not like I'm anywhere close to sleep anyway. Moving as silently as I can, I stealthily creep out of our room and into the richly carpeted hallway, seeking the small metal platform that lies just outside the train's side doors. Letting the wind blow in my face as I step outside invigorates me. It's not surprising how alive being outside makes me feel. Closing my eyes, I experience an overwhelming sense of wholeness.
Those few months I had to work in the mines were the worst in my life. Inhaling that gritty coal dust and knowing that I was stuck miles from any type of fresh air nearly drove me crazy. I'm lucky that I didn't develop claustrophobia or get some sort of lung disease like some of the guys did. I think back to my friends from the mine. One, Tommy, ended up in the sorry District Twelve hospital after he couldn't stop vomiting black, acrid, dust-laced bile. It turns my stomach to remember that afternoon and I have to physically clutch my mouth to stop the involuntary gag from rising.
Needless to say, I value every breath of fresh air now.
I shake my head, trying to rid my memory of those times. Things are different now. I never have to work underground like that again. I turn my thoughts back to Katniss and the situation at hand. I've just got to lean on Annie for this one. I know that Katniss will be overjoyed to see her, but it's no secret that staying in one place for an extended period of time is not her forte.
I sit with my legs crossed and my knees under my chin on the cold platform until I can see the faint pinks and oranges of an approaching dawn streak the sky. It's time to make my way back inside and get some sleep, even if it's only a little. Stepping back inside the cabin, I halfheartedly attempt to straighten my wind mussed hair. I can still smell the night air on my skin and it calms me as I make my way back into our bedroom.
Katniss has finally settled into a more restful sleep, so I decide to let her keep the bed for the night. I scrunch myself onto the sofa in the corner of the room and eventually drift off, my dreams filled with angry Katniss' and beeping Command cuffs.
When I awake, Katniss is sitting above me, running her hand through my hair comfortingly. "Good morning, sleepy head," she murmurs, leaning to place a kiss lightly on my lips.
"Morning," I answer, shifting to sit up and allow her more space. "You're in a good mood," I say suspiciously.
"I'm just excited about seeing Annie today. I ordered breakfast so there's oatmeal and orange juice left for you. I'm going to get ready." Kissing me once more, she rises and walks gracefully into the small bathroom.
I look at the clock and realize that it's already close to 11:30. We'll be pulling into District Four by noon, so I have limited time to eat and prepare myself for what's sure to be a hectic day. Gulping down the glass of juice, I attempt to eat some of the oatmeal, but it sticks like paste in my throat. Abandoning the bowl, I dress myself in my military uniform and give myself a once over in the mirror. This time, I see a healthy man and I am relieved to no longer be greeted by the gaunt, dark presence that used to show up as my reflection.
At 12 sharp, we pull into the District Four train station. There are few people milling around waiting for trains. Most of them have a scared, skittish look about them. That's never good, I think worriedly. People only look like that when they feel there is a serious threat to their safety around. No one makes eye contact with us as we walk away from the tracks and towards the entrance to the station. In fact, most people make it a point to steer clear of us. For a moment, I'm confused. Then the realization hits me: It's the Mockingjay and Gale Hawthorne, in uniform, walking through their station. At one time, Katniss would have drawn a crowd of eager rebel supporters; now, however, people want to keep on the Insurgent's good side and stay away from anything or anyone associated with the Rebellion.
For the first time, I wonder if this mission is going to be bigger than Blaze let on.
Setting our bags in the military car that was sent for our arrival, I can't shake an ever growing feeling of foreboding. I'm anxious to drop Katniss off at Annie's so that I can get to the base and hear the full story behind this "minor Capitol insurgence." Katniss can sense my anxiety and she places her hand gently over mine, trying to calm me with her presence. I lift her hand, kiss her palm, and place it back on mine, but I can't make eye contact with her. I'm too preoccupied with looking out the window, trying to take in all I can about this place. My hunting instincts kick in and my eyes begin to dart, taking in not only the road, but the buildings, windows, and roofs all around us.
I notice that Four doesn't seem like it's recovering as quickly as District Twelve. There's still a lot of damage—buildings that are half blown up, cracked streets from explosions, and lots of boarded up windows and doors. I also notice that there is virtually no one on the streets. Another bad sign. The sinister feeling grows with each mile we travel through town.
Suddenly, there's a distant crack and a loud boom that sends sound waves reverberating through our car. Katniss and I both hunker down to the floor of the car, squeezing between the front and back seats to remove ourselves from such close proximity to windows. "What the hell was that?" I yell at the driver.
"The Capitol insurgents have planted mines throughout the city, sir. Someone must have engaged one of them and it exploded." In that moment, I could kill Blaze for bringing us both here. The driver is still speaking, and I struggle to tune back into what he is saying. "…why no one is one the streets. No one knows where the mines are and everyone remembers watching footage of what they could do from the invasion of the Capitol. It's terrifying to try to walk down the street, never knowing what's going to happen the next time you put your foot down." I look at Katniss, expecting to see fear painted across her face, but all I see is fury. For a split second, I consider telling her everything about the mission because that anger could be good for us. I know that the memory of what these mines are capable of is fresh in both our minds, and the idea that the Capitol is yet again using these as tools of destruction is galling.
When we arrive at Annie's, we're both shaken. I'm calmed by the quiet, secluded nature of her home. The outside of her house is charming, with tropical flowers and short palm trees warmly inviting visitors. I immediately reach up to shield my eyes—the sunlight here is so much brighter than it is at home. As I unload our suitcases from the trunk of the car, Katniss tentatively makes her way to Annie's front door. She pauses to collect herself, and then softly knocks.
After a moment, the door opens slowly and Annie peers around it, looking momentarily startled. She stares at Katniss for a moment, trying to place her and finally, recognition dawns in her eyes. She doesn't say a word, but throws the door open fully and pulls Katniss into a tight hug. Katniss' arms raise slowly, but she eventually returns Annie's embrace wholeheartedly. When they separate, both women's eyes are wet with tears.
"You're finally here," Annie says, clasping Katniss' hands in hers. I sneak past the two of them to set the bags in the foyer and make my way back to the car. Clearing my throat to catch Katniss' attention, she turns to me questioningly. "I need to go to Command now, Catnip. I'll be back here in time for dinner, I'm sure." Her eyes cloud with worry and she lets go of Annie's hand to come lock her arms around my neck. Pulling me into a deep kiss, she whispers "Be careful," against my lips. Touching her forehead to mine, she releases her hold on me and skips back to Annie, who links arms with her and pulls her inside the house.
I'm relieved that it was not more difficult to get her to stay here, especially after the experience we had on the way. I lower myself tensely back into the car. "Take a well-traveled route, please." I ask the driver tiredly. This mission hasn't even started and I'm already exhausted by all of the unknowns here.
We arrive at Command without incident, thankfully. I impatiently make my way through security, enduring the prodding and scanning with a blazing expression on my face. Every minute I wait makes me more anxious get to Blaze's office and figure out what the hell I'm doing here, exactly.
Quickly collecting my belt and badge from security, I round the corner to the elevator bank just as one is closing. I launch myself in, catching my hand in the door and shove the "13" button several times. Waiting with my arms crossed, feet apart, I take the moments as the elevator climbs to try to calm myself. Finally, the doors slide open, and I'm off.
So much energy and apprehension runs through me right now, I feel that I could lift a house. I make my way from the elevator bank to Blaze's office, which is no small distance away, in less than two minutes. Throwing his door wide open, I catch him on the phone. Stepping towards his desk, I motion that he needs to end the call immediately. He nods and holds up one finger, indicating that he is ending the conversation.
"….No, you should be here tomorrow morning. I'm not sure why he didn't mention it. Looking forward to working with you, Soldier Everdeen."
The energy drains from my body and it feels like I've been shot.
Katniss.
Never in my craziest dreams did I think that Blaze would be the one that would ruin my plan. Sinking into an uncomfortable leather chair, I immediately lean forward, head in my hands, fighting to catch my breath. My ruse was over before it even really had a chance to begin. Disbelief floods through me.
"Hawthorne, I asked you to inform Soldier Everdeen about this mission. What happened? Why would you deliberately disobey my order?" Blaze stands, expecting me to rise and answer him, but I don't have a word left to say. My reticence to rise angers him. "Hawthorne? I'm asking you a question."
I raise my head slightly and my voice sounds miserable as I answer him. "I didn't want her to be a part of this. She's given enough for this Rebellion. She deserves to be left alone, for once."
To my surprise, Blaze's expression softens and he resumes his seat. "Hawthorne, I know exactly what Soldier Everdeen has given to this cause and she is highly admired for her sacrifices. I simply assumed that she still had some fight left in her, and from what I could glean from our recent conversation, I'm not wrong." He shuffles some papers around and opens his mouth before closing it again.
"What, sir? You were about to say something." I prod him to complete his unspoken thought.
"I just…Well, I think this was a decision that you might have left to Ms. Everdeen herself, Hawthorne. You didn't even give her a chance to choose." His words sting because they're the truth. I should have given her the chance to decide for herself, but I was so sure that she would be terrified of more fighting.
Maybe I do still have things to learn about the Girl on Fire.
Blaze clears his throat and resumes his military demeanor, signaling that he is ready to move on to more pressing business. He can move forward because he doesn't have to go home and face Katniss. I, on the other hand, am only beginning to imagine the horrors that await me when I step through the door of Annie's house.
As if reading my mind, he says "I know you're anxious to get back to Ms. Odair's to smooth things over, but we must go over plans first." He lays a map of District Four in front of me. As he drones on about plans, the very same plans I was so anxious to hear about only moments ago, I ascertain that we are here to do much the same thing as we were doing in the Capitol. Sweep the streets, disengage as many mines as possible, and squash the Capitol insurgents. The point is to do this as quickly as possible both to get on with more pressing military developments as well as to set an example for other possible insurgents concerning what could happen if they try to spawn another rebellion.
I thought I would never again find myself picking through city streets, trying to detonate mines before someone steps on them. I especially do not want Katniss responsible for any part of this mission either. Regardless of what Blaze says, she has done and seen enough.
Getting Katniss to agree with me is going to be a whole different story. I walk slowly out of Command once I'm dismissed from Blaze's office, dreading the conversation…no, argument…that surely awaits me when I get to Annie's.