"Where the hell were you!" Becky shouted when he walked into the art museum.

"Out" he murmured with a small smile.

"First night and you disappeared! Where the hell did you go?" she cried walking after him.

"I met up with an old friend"

"Dean"

"Yes"

"Are you insane?"

"I think I might be" he said thoughtfully and sitting back on the black leather sofa watching Becky regard him with wary eyes.

"Your ex! Does Balthazar know you're meeting up with him?"

"No, not yet so don't go telling him, Becky"

"Do you still love him?"

"Who?"

Becky gaped at him. "Dean, Castiel, do you still love him?"

"No"

Becky narrowed her eyes at him and slapped her clipboard down and knelt on the sofa next to him.

"I've known you for about two years now and if there is one thing I know truly well about you is that you…are a dreadful liar"

"I'm not lying" he protested kicking back and looking away from her probing eyes.

"You are! You do still love him don't you?"

"No, I loved him once upon a time but not now…I love Balthazar"

Becky hummed flicking her blonde hair behind her back and straightening up.

"Strange thing about love is you can love two people at the same time" Becky said tapping a pen against her lips. "It's just about who makes you the happiest, the one you look at and can smile without question or get that happy lovey dovey feeling when they look at them for just a second"

Castiel swallowed and looked away from her wistful dreamy look and instead focused on one of his own paintings. It was hard to admit to himself but he enjoyed the few hours on the pier with Dean simply reconciling. It was nice and he enjoyed spending time with him like old times and he can't remember smiling and even laughing that much in months. It was work, work, work, and more work these days with arranging the wedding and pleasantries involved.

"I'm leaving you to handle this" Castiel said jumping up.

"Where are you going now?"

"My mom's" he murmured heading to the door and stepping out leaving Becky to look around and sigh deeply. Castiel drove over to his family home and parked outside looking up at the white and red house feeling a sense of homesickness he hadn't felt in a long time. The front door opened and he smiled seeing a nine year old, Anna, wave at him happily. Castiel stepped out and opened his arms when she ran towards him and hugged him hard.

"You're here!" she said happily looking up at him. "Mom will be so happy"

"Where is she?"

"In the garden with Luke" she said grabbing his hand and tugging him inside. Castiel stepped inside inhaling the smell of fresh laundry, cookies, and air freshener. It made him smile and he walked through the back door to see Eve kneeling on the grass, hair tied back, mud on her jeans and a smile on her face. His baby brother, Luke, bounced in his chair sucking on his fist while nursery rhymes played in the background.

"Now this is why I miss home" he said and smiled when Eve looked up and squealed overexcited.

"Baby!" she cried ripping her gloves off and darting over to him. Castiel let the air be squeezed out of him for a long minute before she pulled back cupping his cheeks.

"I am so sorry I missed the opening but Luke was sick and I couldn't leave him…"

"Mom, it's okay" he said reassuring her. "It's open for weeks on end"

"Where's Balthazar?"

"Work" he said with a smile.

"Oh" she said disappointed and sighed brushing her hands down his t-shirt when a thought occurred to her.

"Have you seen or spoken to…Dean?"

"Yes" he said with a brief nod.

"How was it? I hardly see him anymore and I feel so terrible about it! He was family once and now when I see him I panic because you're not here anymore and he's…" she said trailing off with a sad sigh.

"He's what?"

"Lonely" she murmured with a pat on his shoulder. "He's lonely"

Castiel blinked surprised watching her move away and collect Luke out of his chair. "Say hi to Castiel"

Castiel held out his hands for him and smiled softly when his big blue eyes looked up at him.

"Hey" he murmured jiggling him and smiling when he giggled at him.

Eve walked into the kitchen washing her hands and looking back over to him. "You didn't answer my question"

"It was okay, we met up and we talked"

"Is that it?"

"What were you expecting mom? I'm engaged to another man"

"So? It's about reconnecting with him, he was your friend, Castiel, and you chucked that away like it was garbage"

"Mom…"

Eve gave him a frown and pointed a finger at him. "You did and you know it, Castiel"

Castiel let out a tired sigh looking down at the table and his clasped hands feeling low.

"I never meant to hurt him"

"Well you did and I am not one for dragging up the past, sweetheart, and I know you did it because you thought it was right but you were not here when the relationship ended and you didn't see Dean"

"What do you mean?" he murmured confused.

"He was heartbroken, Castiel, you were his closest friend and the one he loved more than anything. Dean just…built a wall around himself and drowned in alcohol, cigarettes, staying late out or staying in. Sam was so worried about him and the hill…" she said looking out of the window and nodding towards it. "Sometimes late at night or when the sun was setting I'd look up for a moment and see him sat all alone. Dean was just sat there quietly on the hill looking out and it was painful to watch"

Castiel felt an ache spread in his chest and he looked away from his mother's eyes.

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because someone had to tell you and I don't think Dean is going to spill his heart" Eve said warming milk up and smiling at Luke who opened his mouth greedily.

"It's been five years and I fully expected him to be with someone else"

"Nope, there have been a few women and a few men but no one serious" she said looking down at Luke. "Anyway, I guess that's the past now…let's talk about the wedding!"

"That's not for a long time"

"Oh hush! It still needs planning"

Castiel rolled his eyes looking away from her once again and attempting to digest this brand new information about Dean. He knew of his own pain over their split but he didn't know about Dean and knowing the truth was far worse than making up your own theories. He flipped open his own cell phone and looked at Dean's number wondering if he should call him but snapped it close instead deciding against it. Castiel watched his mother fuss and start to make him a sandwich claiming him to be too skinny and he needed fattening up as soon as possible.

His eyes shut and he thought of the next few weeks and wondered what they would bring.

~0~0~0~

Dean looked up at the art museum and inhaled deeply before entering and walking towards the gallery. It was emptier than opening night and he stepped inside seeing a few people mingling but he ignored them and turned in favour to looking over the paintings. Dean smiled recognising one from the time he was with him and trailed his fingers down it slowly.

"That's a fine you know"

Dean turned at the sound of his voice and flashed him a grin. "It's quiet here tonight"

"People do not know art" he murmured. "They come in the day anyway, not the night"

"How much is this?"

"$5000"

Dean scoffed turning his back on it and stalking towards the other closely watched by Castiel who followed after him slowly.

"This?"

"$7500"

"Why are you robbing people, Castiel?"

"You never use my full name"

"I do not know this Castiel robbing people blind" Dean teased making Castiel smile amused and look down at the ground.

"We all have to make our way in the world"

"I see that" Dean replied looking back to the painting and towards Castiel who looked around him with a furrowed brow.

"They are not my prices; if I could I'd sell them for nothing"

"So whose are they?"

"My management's choices, they need money, I need money, and I have already made two sales apparently" he said in a soft voice. Dean watched him carefully and noticed the inner conflict in his eyes.

"You hate the fame don't you?"

"No, I hate the publicity and the parading around"

Dean went to speak when he heard loud footsteps behind them and turned to see a tall man with golden brown hair, hint of a beard, and curiously calm eyes looking directly at Castiel.

"Hello" Balthazar murmured pulling Castiel into a kiss. "It looks amazing, darling"

"Thank you" Castiel whispered up to him and cast a glance over to Dean who was watching them with wide horrified eyes.

"Is this a seller?" Balthazar said looking over to Dean and flashing him a warm but fake smile. "My Cassy is a super star don't you think?"

"Yeah…yeah he is" Dean replied slowly looking over to Castiel who grimaced in apology.

"Where's the wench?"

"Don't call Becky a wench; she's at the back on the phone"

"I've ordered us a table so get to the car" he murmured smacking his ass lightly and turning on his heel to walk to the back. Dean watched him walk away before turning his eyes to Castiel who also looked back to watch him disappear around the corner.

"Wow" Dean murmured softly.

"I'm sorry…I didn't think he'd be here…"

"Of course he would be, his fiancé has his very own art gallery and of course he would show his support" Dean said backing away.

"Dean…" Castiel whispered with pain evident in his eyes at Dean's obvious panic and distress.

"I'll see you around, Cas" he whispered turning around and heading away. Castiel stepped forward reaching out for him and let it fall closing his eyes in defeat. Dean rushed out of the main doors darting for his car and jumping in starting her up. He sped out of the lane and headed towards somewhere unknown. His heart beat loudly in his ears and his stomach churned replaying the image of Balthazar kissing Castiel who responded with years of practise. It hurt more than he could possibly imagine and he shoved the car into first gear speeding down the road and ended up near the pier once again.

Dean opened the door and braved the cold of the ocean air and slammed it hard. The sound it made was loud and echoing like a gun fired in the night, it made Dean feel much better and he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket moving forward and climbing the stairs onto the empty pier. His feet moved forward till they reached the very end and he looked out at the black sea feeling the water hit his face in a spray. It was cool and he closed his eyes relishing the feeling before snapping them back open and felt pathetic.

His teeth ground together and he kicked the wooden beam hard feeling the pain shatter his foot and he cried out. Dean's hand moved down and he pulled out his cell dialling Sam's number.

"Tell me I'm the biggest fool in the world"

"What? Dean, what are you talking about?"

"How can I still be in love with someone who broke my heart, who is now moved on with the richest most good looking dude out there and he looks at me like I'm the ghost of Christmas past? Why do I still want him back?" Dean shouted down the phone pacing up and down.

"Dean, are you at the beach? I can hear the sea…Dean; I think you answered that for yourself"

"I don't know what to do!" he shouted out at the sea.

Sam blinked and breathed out shaking his head. "Do what you think is best!"

"Breaking them up?"

"Dean, no not that"

"Well why not! I had him first, he was mine and I want him so much" Dean cried down the phone. "I hate that I do but I can't help it"

"Have you been drinking?"

"No, I am thinking perfectly clear"

"Dean, just come home so we can talk this over and I am not hearing you shout near a beach" Sam said rubbing his forehead wondering if this was yet another breakdown from Dean not in control of his feelings.

Dean swallowed and closed his eyes in his own defeat. "I'll be back soon"

"Dean…"

Dean cut him off and dropped down on the bench fiddling with his phone. It felt like a mess wrapped in a riddle and he couldn't work his way through it to make any sense. Everything inside of Dean called out to get him back but the other side of him was his conscience and it told him not to do it.

Back in a restaurant, Castiel looked across to Balthazar who was looking over the menu with a raised eyebrow.

"What do you want?"

"I'll have the steak"

"Oh sounds good" Balthazar nodded and dropped it down and narrowed his eyes slightly. "You've been weird since the museum, Cas, what's wrong?"

"I…" he said and let out a deep sigh "I haven't been entirely truthful with you"

"Okay?"

"The man I was talking to at the gallery wasn't a buyer, he was Dean"

Balthazar's eyes widened only slightly before he sat back regarding him for a long minute.

"I'm sorry; the Dean who is the love of your life was stood talking to you?"

"Yes, I'm sorry I didn't tell you"

"What….when did he get back in contact?"

"The opening night, I met up with him and we had a coffee"

Balthazar blinked many times and leaned forward linking his hands together on top of the table top. Castiel watched him with wary eyes while Balthazar eyes brooded with an unknown emotion.

"Does he want you back?"

"No"

"Are you sure?"

"Well…no but I don't want him back" Castiel replied grabbing his raised hands and clinging to them. "Dean being back in my life means nothing and it doesn't affect us"

"So the love of my fiancés life just returns and I'm meant to accept that it won't affect us?"

"Yes, please" Castiel begged and looked up when the waiter walked over and looked between them.

"I can come back"

"Oh no please, you came at the right time" Balthazar said removing his hands and picking up the menu. Castiel sighed deeply folding his own hands into his lap watching Balthazar interact and flirt as usual with the flustered waiter.

"He was the love of your life, Cas, and I'm sorry but that little fact scares me"

"I'm yours"

"Yes, yes you are…but for how long?" Balthazar murmured with a raised eyebrow.

"For a long time" Castiel snapped and brought out his engagement ring. "I said yes didn't I?"

Balthazar looked at the silver band and up to Castiel's troubled blue eyes and nodded slowly in agreement. Castiel got up and circled the table dropping into his lap and kissing him deeply, Balthazar responded cupping his cheek and pulling back.

"You'll do anything to convince me won't you?"

"I love you" he whispered earnestly. Balthazar stared into his eyes and smiled softly pulling him back into a soft kiss.

"I know, but you have to get off me before we give the guests dinner and a sex show" he whispered nudging him gently off him. Castiel sat opposite him and exhaled slowly wanting to believe it deep down that he loved Balthazar and only Balthazar but his heart metaphorically laughed at his foolishness.

~0~0~0~

Dean returned home to see Ellen moving towards him and slap him hard on the cheek.

"Are you trying to give me a heart attack!"

Dean winced and blinked dramatically looking back towards her stunned.

"Um, no" he murmured looking over her shoulder towards Sam leaning against the doorframe. "What have I done now?"

"On the pier at this time of night? Dean Winchester, you are a silly son of a bitch" she said shoving his shoulder and moving away back to Bobby furious. Dean exhaled and moved towards Sam who crossed his arms looking at him patiently.

"Don't say a word, Sam"

"I wasn't going to but you've been gone hours and Ellen has been freaking out thinking you did the swan dive"

"I'm not suicidal" Dean murmured grabbing a beer. "I'm insane"

"No you're not; you're just having a hard time dealing with ex issues"

Dean snorted with his lips around the bottle. "Ex issues"

"Well I'm right aren't I?"

"I don't know"

"Dean, you love the guy" he said and grabbed Dean's wrist showing the bracelet still hanging there. "You have kept this close to you all these years and if you want him back you need to do something about it"

"You told me not to!"

Sam closed his eyes and faced him. "I mean don't go charging in all guns blazing and ruin the relationship, Dean, if you want him back you have to win him back"

"How?"

"He fell in love with you once upon a time, just do it all over again"

"That is not helpful"

Sam shrugged his shoulders dramatically and simply held his hands up. "How am I meant to know? I've never had someone fall in love with me"

"Oh, Sammy, you're breaking my heart" he teased and smirked when Sam shoved him hard and leaving a laughing Dean behind. Dean clucked his tongue into his cheek and sighed pulling out his phone and dialling his number.

Castiel was stood outside getting a breath of fresh air whilst Balthazar paid for the bill when he rang. Castiel stared at the caller I.D for a long second before answering it.

"Hello, Dean"

"Hey, Cas"

"Why are you calling?"

"I want to meet up tomorrow and don't say you can't because this gallery can survive without you for one day while we bond all over again"

"Dean, I can't just drop everything for you. I have been here four days and I have things to do"

"What things?"

"Work things, Dean, the reason I am here which is not for you"

Dean nodded pressing his lips together. "I'm asking for one hour here, you dick"

Castiel gritted his teeth and let out a breath slowly. "Fine"

"Really?"

"One hour and I'm yours"

"Oh really"

Castiel rolled his eyes looking up at the star lit sky. "Don't do that"

"What?"

"You know what"

"I'm just too irresistible for you, I'll see you tomorrow, Casanova" he murmured hearing Castiel's breath hitch at his nickname.

"I guess so, Dean-o" he murmured and ended the call turning to see Balthazar come out and hold out his hand for him to take. Castiel linked their fingers together walking back to the car and kept his head held high but avoided his eye contact. Dean smirked tapping the phone against his lips in thought. If he wanted him back, Dean was going to have to be ruthless. It was a one man war to the bitter end.

A/N: Your responses are awesome! It's kinda kicking off now and Castiel is going to be very, very, naughty in later chapters and what I have in mind may get me a lot of hate. Hahaha…

Keep those reviews coming, my beautiful readers.