Dean stirred feeling and sensing light all around him and felt an ache over his entire body from lying on the hard ground. His eyes opened to see a blue sky and he turned his head to see Castiel lying on his chest breathing deeply still fast asleep.

Dean stared at him for a long moment and lifted his free hand to trail his fingers down the side of his face feeling the softness and the faint stubble on his cheek prickle his fingertips. His mouth flickered into his mouth and he moved to bury his nose and mouth into his hair inhaling the fruity smell of his shampoo and pulled away before he could stir him.

It was when he pulled back he felt the full effects of his hangover. Dean balked and shifted too much and startled Castiel to wake up. Castiel moaned gripping the top of his head and looked up to Dean who smiled sheepishly back.

"Oh my god" he murmured and looked at his surroundings in disbelief. "I…I slept out…with you"

"Yeah, we got very drunk" Dean murmured sitting up and pressing his hand to his lower back to steady him.

"Oh I'm dead, he's going to kill me" Castiel whispered leaning his head on Dean's shoulder and he blinked surprised. "Oh god"

"Do you remember anything from last night?"

"No and yes…why?"

Dean narrowed his eyes and shrugged his free shoulder. "We…um…we kissed"

"What?" Castiel breathed moving away and staring at the side of his face. "Why would I do that?"

"You're a cuddly drunk, Cas, and it just happened…twice" he replied looking out across the town and rubbed his forehead.

Castiel moved away looking stiff and struggled up scrambling for his phone and turning it on. He breathed out and held in an inner panic which was threatening to come out. He looked down to see dozens of messages from his management, Becky, and most of all, Balthazar. Dean stood up and stretched out feeling bones click into place and his muscles stretch out perfectly.

"Cas"

"Don't, Dean, just don't" he said and pressed the phone to his ear calling Balthazar who answered on the second ring.

"Where the hell are you!"

"I…got very, very, very, drunk and crashed at an old friends house"

"Dean?"

"No…no, an old friend…Jo" he murmured looking back to Dean who snorted amused. "I am so sorry but I lost track of my phone and I was drunk"

"Do you have any idea how worried I have been?"

"Yes, yes I know and I'm coming home now"

"Fine" Balthazar snapped hanging up on him. Castiel dropped the phone from his ear and turned to look at Dean who was staring away from him and looking into the distance.

"Lying to the one you are supposed to love, classy behaviour" Dean said flicking his eyes over to him and raising an eyebrow at him. Castiel scowled and moaned rubbing his forehead and a running ache down his side.

"Last night was such a mistake"

"Sure" Dean murmured with a hint of hurt in his eyes. "It was such a huge mistake when we poured our hearts out and you were all over me, Cas"

"I was drunk"

"Yeah, yeah, because people do stupid things when they're drunk and do things that they regret deeply don't they, Cas?"

Castiel turned hard eyes towards him knowing exactly what he meant and breathed out shakily.

"Don't throw that at me, that was your own doing"

"Oh I'm so sorry for fucking a guy when I was single" he hissed.

"I haven't got time for this" Castiel said turning to walk away when Dean moved towards him grabbing hold of his wrist and yanking him back. Castiel stood in his personal space staring into his angry but hurt eyes.

"You've just lied to the one you are meant to love"

"Because he won't understand and he doesn't trust you"

"The guy barely knows me"

"No, but he knows me and he knows how I used to feel about you, he doesn't trust your intentions"

"How you used to feel about me?"

"Yes, how I used to feel about you"

"Liar" Dean murmured softly.

Castiel shook his head backing away from him. "Don't you dare play games with me, Dean, I'm telling the truth but it is your choice whether you believe them or you'd rather live in a fairy tale! I love him; I love Balthazar, not you"

Dean clenched his jaw watching him turn away and walk back down the hill. He stood there hands deep in his pockets, stomach churning and head aching from his hangover and his eyes blurred with tears. He exhaled heavily and rubbed his eyes furiously before collecting his jacket and pulling out his car keys.

Castiel drove back to the apartments and ignored the twist in his gut at leaving Dean behind like that but it had to be done. He jumped out of the car running up the stairs and unlocked the apartment door to see an empty room.

"Hello?" he murmured shutting the door and wincing at the loud sound. Balthazar stepped out of the bedroom and simply folded his arms watching him.

"You look like shit" Balthazar commented watching Castiel nod and drop his keys on the side.

"I'm so sorry" he croaked.

"What were you thinking?"

"I don't know there was a lot beer" he murmured and moved into the kitchen pouring a glass of water. Balthazar rolled his eyes following him and leaning against the table.

"I was worried sick! Becky had no idea where you were either and the poor woman was frantic with worry, Cas, and your phone was bloody off!"

"I'm a grown man, Balthazar, I got drunk and I stayed out"

"Yes like a common teenager" Balthazar said with a raised eyebrow. "Are you sure Dean wasn't involved?"

"Dean had nothing to do with this!" Castiel shouted at him and drank back the water before slamming it down. "I need sleep"

"I'm sure you do, princess, now like all the rest of the world I have work to do and you better be in that gallery tonight because we are not here for fun and games" Balthazar said in a cool tone and snatched up his own keys. "We're here for five days and already you're acting like you're a teenager all over again. This is not the one I love"

"Don't you have work?"

Balthazar scoffed moving away and heading out of the door slamming it hard behind him. Castiel closed his eyes and sighed moving into the bedroom and dropped down face first on the bed before curling into the covers feeling sleep pull at him and succumbed into it.

Dean returned home and opened the door slowly and carefully but it was all ruined when Bones ran up to him barking excitedly.

"Dumb dog" he hissed shoving him away and heading towards the stairs.

"Whoa! Hold your ass, mister" Ellen shouted pointing a wooden spoon at him. "Where the hell have you been?"

"I'm sorry, have I travelled back in time? I recall being of age!" he shouted back to her.

"Don't you dare use that tone with me in my house" she said dragging him back down and hitting him hard on the head with the spoon. Dean hissed edging away from her attacks and hit the wall with a slump of defeat.

"I was with Cas, we got drunk on the hill and fell asleep"

"Seriously?" she said with wide eyes. "You really are deluded"

"Shut up, it wasn't intentional"

"Sure"

"It wasn't! I got a lot more drunk than I planned and so did he" Dean said fiddling with the zip of his jacket. "I kissed him twice"

"He's engaged, Dean"

"He kissed me right back, Ellen, so he doesn't love him as much as he claims to" Dean said with a sneer.

"You fool"

Dean rolled his eyes away from her and swallowed hard tasting old beer and made a sound of disgust.

"Look I need sleep, I have a hangover the size of Brazil and I'll talk about it later" he said pushing off the wall and heading up the stairs. Ellen watched him and sighed in disapproval moving back into the kitchen to see Bobby sat at the kitchen table reading the newspaper.

"He's back"

"That boy will be the death of me" he murmured flicking over the page. "What's the story this time?"

"Got drunk and slept on the hill…with Cas"

Bobby looked over to her and sighed shaking his head. "He's going to get hurt all over again"

"You think that's his endgame"

"To get hurt?"

"No to win him back"

"Yeah, I think it is and I know that boy better than anyone and he's a fighter"

"More like a pain in the ass" Ellen murmured grabbing her cup.

"You're a pain in the ass"

"Yep but I'm your pain in the ass" she whispered kissing his cheek. Bobby flushed gently nudging her away when she moved to get more coffee.

Dean pulled the covers over his head and hovered staring at the black bracelet around his wrist and fingered it gently. His heart beat painfully against his chest and he sighed shutting his eyes still hearing Castiel's words ring in his head and he might have believed him if it wasn't for last night still in his mind. Dean knew something wasn't right and if he truly loved Balthazar then he wouldn't have kissed him back, cuddled him, or even poured his heart out for the taking. He wasn't about to back down without a fight but he was hurt now and he would wait and see what would happen next and he hoped Castiel came to him and not the other way around.

~0~0~0~

Castiel woke feeling fresh and looked up at the angry face of Becky.

"You…you complete dick!" she said smacking him hard on the head. Castiel winced jumping up and scowling deeply at her.

"You left me! Everyone was asking for you! You're here for a reason and the reason is your many paintings sitting in an art gallery!" she shouted following him out. "You lost a sale because he wanted to talk to you, where the hell where you?"

"I made a huge mistake"

"What do you mean?"

"I can trust you with anything right?"

"Of course" she replied softening slightly.

"I was with Dean and we got drunk on the hill nearby. I fell asleep in his arms and it's the best night sleep I've had in ages. He held me all night and didn't let go of me once, I think I woke up during the night and I was so confused about what was happening and the next thing I know he's holding me even tighter and stroking my back like he knew I was awake…"

"Oh Castiel" she murmured dropping her bag down. "You are head over heels in love with him"

"No"

"Oh yes! No one speaks like that if they are not head over heels in love with someone! He held you all night? Did anything else happen? Why am I so excited about this?" she said with a squeal and stopped looking astonished.

"Because you're insane"

"I know" she said with a giggle. "But come on! Did something else happen?"

"I'm an engaged man"

"Just tell me!"

"Fine! We kissed…apparently" he said with a sigh. "I can't remember but he can"

Becky cooed and stopped at the look on Castiel's face.

"Come here" she said with her own sigh and pulled him into a tight hug. Castiel clung to her and simply stared at the light blue wall feeling her hands rub his back till she pulled back shaking her head.

"You're got yourself into a pickle"

"More like a hurricane"

"Does Balthazar know?"

"No and he can't know, it was a mistake, Becky"

"Aren't they always?"

Castiel gave her a sidelong glance flashing her disapproving look which she matched with pure innocence.

"Don't do anything stupid, Castiel, you could end up making the biggest mistake of your life"

"I'm not going to do anything with Dean"

"That could be your mistake" she said moving away from him. Castiel rolled his eyes when she pulled out papers and set them out on the table.

"The one question people want to know is are you going to paint a new painting?"

"Yes"

"Seriously?" Becky said spinning around to face him and clapping happily like a seal. "When?"

"When I find inspiration and not being bothered by my personal assistant"

"Spoilsport" she said with a flick of her hair and turned her back on him.

Castiel made them coffee and waffles and sat down signing paperwork and discussing work related issues till the late hours of the afternoon.

"I feel like committing"

"Please don't, I kinda like you and your presence will be missed" she said rubbing his hair and standing up. "Come, we have an art gallery to attend"

"Please don't make me go"

"Get up!" she ordered. Castiel frowned and picked up his mobile seeing no messages from Balthazar and even regretfully Dean. He felt an old pang at how he left it and wondered if he would yet again attend this evening's art gallery.

They arrived forty minutes later and he stepped aside seeing the manager notice him and walk over.

"The runaway returns"

"Yes, I apologise for my absence, Zach"

"You lost not only yourself a sale but me" he said with narrowed eyes.

"I'll get a sale tonight" he promised and watched Zach salute and move on. Becky looked up at him with wide eyes and walked into the gallery with her heels tapping loudly. Castiel sighed folding his arms close to him and followed after her looking around the spacious space and zeroed in on a familiar site talking to an unknown man.

Dean stood with an unknown man talking animatedly to the guy who listened with bright enthusiasm for Dean's constant chatter. Castiel watched moving towards the beam holding up the ceiling and leaned against it watching Dean brush a hand down his arm laughing.

"What are you doing?" Becky hissed.

Castiel shushed her urgently staring at Dean who was now more interested in the man then the painting now. Becky peered around him and gasped in knowledge looking up to Castiel shocked.

"You're not jealous are you?"

"No…" he murmured looking away.

Becky snorted with a shake of her head. "He's nothing like I expected, he's like the love child of a Greek god and an underwear model. I know Balthazar is charming, successful, and of course gorgeous but…oh sweet merciful heaven why oh why did you let him go?"

"You have no idea how many times I ask that question" he whispered closing his eyes.

"Can I have him?"

"I thought you had a crush on the second Winchester?"

"Which you have yet to get me a phone number!" she hissed poking him hard in the arm. "Stop stalking him and go talk to him!"

Castiel was shoved forward by Becky who sighed and walked away. Castiel swallowed clasping his fingers together and looking over to Dean who looked up in mid laugh to see him standing there in the centre.

Dean looked away and carried on listening to the guy who called himself, Paddy, and could feel the intensity of Castiel's eyes watching him. Dean raked his eyes over Paddy and reached up pushing a curl away from his forehead.

"It was bothering me" he murmured when Paddy stared at him surprised.

"Oh no, it's fine"

Dean smirked amused and looked up with mild curiosity when Castiel stood in front of him with blazing eyes.

"Paddy, this is Castiel"

"It's you! I love your work!" he gushed shaking his hand. Castiel stared at him shaking his hand slowly before looking over to Dean who looked between them and smirked.

"Can I have a word with you?"

"Of course, excuse me" Dean said politely to Paddy who watched with adoration in his eyes when Castiel walked away towards the other end closely followed by Dean.

Dean stopped when Castiel turned to face him. "Something wrong, Cas?"

"Who was he? Do you know him?"

"His name is Paddy, he enjoys art a lot, he likes going to these galleries, and he's good looking don't you think?"

"No"

"Oh" Dean murmured moving into his personal space and edging his mouth to his ear. "Is Casanova feeling a little jealous?"

"No" he repeated rolling his eyes up to meet his.

"I think you are… I think it's bubbling away in your veins, your heart, and all over you waiting to come out. I think last night did a lot more than get us drunk"

"Stop it" Castiel whispered up to him.

"Admit it…you know jealously is such an ugly trait and can show you everything. It can drive you mad with fear…longing…and the need to have that one person for yourself" Dean whispered and pressed a hand over his heart feeling it pump wildly under the thin membrane of skin. "Are you trying to tell me that if I went off with Paddy over there and had mindless sex with him over and over again because I can, because I'm free, I'm single, and of course you couldn't have a say…you wouldn't mind?"

Castiel struggled looking away from him. "Why are you doing this?"

"I'm not doing anything"

"You are! Go on then; go take him back to a hotel or even your home and fuck him senseless"

"Fine" Dean breathed against his ear and moved away from him. Castiel felt the breath inside him stick and he watched as Dean walked back to Paddy and whispers something in his ear. Paddy pulled back and nodded slowly in agreement before following after him. Dean looked back to Castiel who stood watching him with a set jaw rooted to the spot he stood in till Dean gave in and walked out through the doors.

Castiel exhaled pained feeling on the verge of a panic attack and turned practically running to the end and walked into the back room. He dropped down on the couch and pressed his head into his hands feeling an inner storm inside you. It was fiery, dark, painful, and something he didn't expect to feel so early on. Dean was right about the jealously which laughed and ate away at him slowly when revealing images of Dean and Paddy played in his mind like a movie. His heart ached and he struggled looking over and around the empty room.

His phone next to him rang gently and he pulled it towards him and flicked it open.

"Cassy"

"Balthazar" he whispered and closed his eyes.

"This is probably stupid but I feel bad for leaving on bad terms"

"No, no, it was all me and I'm so sorry"

"It's okay, you're young and you deserve to have a little fun"

Castiel chuckled and trailed his fingers over his knee. "Where are you?"

"Near the interstate, I'll be late this evening. It's times like these when I hate this fucking job"

"You love it really"

Balthazar hummed not knowing whether to agree with him or not. "I'll see you later"

"Okay"

"I love you"

"You too" Castiel whispered and snapped the phone shut and dropped it on the floor. His eyes shut and he moved to lie down feeling sick at the thought of Dean seducing that other man and curled in on himself wanting nothing more than to forget.

~0~0~0~

"Here" Dean said handing over $30 to Paddy. "All that for walking out with me"

"I could… if you wanted to" he murmured with a wink.

"No, Paddy, move along" Dean said watching him climb out of the car and walk away. Dean leaned against the seat and slammed his fist against the steering wheel knowing he had probably made a big mistake but it felt so good to see the pain and jealously. It meant he still felt for him.

Dean drove around for what seemed like hours but it wasn't and two hours later he found himself and his car waiting outside the gallery. Dean climbed out knowing it was closing hours and darted inside him quickly keeping to the shadows. He peeked into see no one around and knew it was false hope and he would just be escorted out anyway if he wasn't here. Dean walked around looking for any sign and came towards a door at the back and peeked in to see a dim light and a figure on the couch.

"Whoa" he murmured and slunk in closing it behind him and looked down at Castiel sleeping peacefully. Dean dropped down on one knee and shook him gently watching Castiel stir and sit up startled.

"You fell asleep" Dean murmured.

Castiel stared at him and glanced down at his watch feeling sick and looked over to him.

"Shouldn't you be balls deep in some pretty boy?"

"Oh crude language"

"Well shouldn't you?"

"No, I sent him away" Dean whispered and moved to stand up when Castiel gripped his wrist to stop him from moving.

"So you didn't?"

"No"

"Why not?"

"He's not that pretty"

"Dean…"

"I couldn't" Dean whispered staring up at him all sleepy eyed and confused.

"You were right" Castiel murmured after a long minute of silence. "I did feel jealously"

"Isn't nice is it?"

"No, I didn't like the way you looked at him, he looked at you, and my head feels like it's stuck in a cotton candy machine"

Dean smirked amused and reached up trailing a hand into his hair. Castiel swallowed when Dean brought him forward cupping the side of his face staring into his eyes.

"What do you feel now?"

"I don't know" he whispered shifting closer to him. "I know that I keep dreaming about you and some of them aren't good but…"

Dean cut him off bringing him into a soft kiss leaving Castiel to whimper and pull away.

"Dean, I can't…"

"It's okay, it's okay, just don't think" Dean murmured kissing the corner of his mouth, Castiel responded fisting a hand into his t-shirt and moving his lips against his. Dean brought him down so he was kneeling on the floor with him and pushed his tongue into his mouth tasting old coffee and moaned low. Castiel drew away shakily and clung to him shaking when Dean shushed him kissing the dip in his collarbone. In Dean's eyes it was a breakthrough but it was the smallest crack in the wall Castiel had built around him and all he needed was more time to break it down and take back what was his.

A/N: You're all awesome. I love the feedback and you're all over excited about this. Please review!