Chapter 5
24 March 2011
"Dad! I'm not going to be drinking. I promise. I don't drink - it's dangerous. We just want to see the band."
It was dangerous but Kurt didn't mean it the way Burt understood it. He couldn't even get gas at the dentist because when he was under the influence he jumped randomly. Kurt was just glad that he had never jumped in his sleep.
"That's very mature of you, Kurt. If you mean it. I guess you're growing up and I'm going to have to get used to the idea that you have a boyfriend now. I don't like it but I have to accept it. Just remember your curfew and I will be waiting up for you."
"We don't even have school, why do I have a curfew? It's a long drive back from Columbus and Blaine's mom said it would be fine for me to sleep over."
"Yeah, like I'm going to let you sleep with your boyfriend. No."
"His mother and three sisters will all be there."
"No. And I'll be checking to make sure you haven't been drinking."
"Fine."
There was huge crowd when they arrived at Skully's. Blaine, Kurt, Jeff, and Nick waited impatiently in line.
"I can't believe that we are going to see Watershed!" exclaimed Jeff.
"They're checking IDs," whispered Kurt worriedly.
"Don't sweat it," assured Nick. "Torri swore that our IDs were perfect. We'll get in."
Kurt didn't care for the band or the club scene but he wanted to have fun with Blaine and his friends. He and Blaine had spent as much time as they could together the past week cementing their bond as boyfriends. Making out had progressed more quickly than Kurt had expected but he didn't regret it. It might seem a little slutty for a girl to jerk her boyfriend off the first week together but they were both teenage boys. Their make-out sessions got so steamy that it was either jerk each other off or excuse themselves to take care of things alone. After a few sessions, they's both realized that was just silly. Besides, once the sexual tension was relieved (temporally), they could concentrate on just being together which they both enjoyed.
Most of their Dalton friends were busy for spring break but Nick was staying with Jeff for the break and when the two had called to suggest the outing, Blaine had been excited to accept. Kurt had discovered that this version of Nick and Jeff had only been together since January. He couldn't help but wonder why it had taken them so long in this timeline when they'd been living together at Dalton since their freshman year.
As they approached the door, Kurt noticed that the bouncer was checking IDs carefully. He didn't care about getting in but it was as good a time as any to practice his control. He'd spent time practicing and devising anchors. He'd sorted his jewelry into a three by six grid with each piece representing a roll of one of his dice. He'd always used his dice as a milestone before but this way he could take the results with him as an anchor instead. It was much better than taking his chances and checking later. After all, what good was knowing if you couldn't do anything about it?
It was a safe practice run because he didn't think he'd even be here at Skully's in any universe that split before he and Blaine got together. Kurt focused on watching the closest time lines as they approached the bouncer. There were so many people making choices that it was overwhelming. He could handle it though. He wasn't actually trying to track or hang on to any of them. He was just keeping an eye out in case they were rejected at the door and he had a chance to change that.
He saw his chance. They were moving a littler faster in that line for some reason and as the bouncer checked Kurt's ID, he wasn't paying attention. There was a girl right behind Kurt and she leaned over and flashed her cleavage just as Kurt handed the bouncer his ID. The distracted man just waved him through. Kurt confidently leapt. He didn't know for sure that he'd needed to but he could see some lines where he didn't get in.
They found a table near the stage and ordered some food. They didn't push their luck by ordering any alcohol.
"So Nick, why are you in Ohio? Don't you usually go home?" asked Blaine.
"It's my mom's turn and she didn't really care. I asked to stay with Jeff and she agreed to let me."
"You're lucky your parents don't mind that you live with you're boyfriend," commented Kurt.
"They don't know," Nick replied. "They know that Jeff is my best friend but they don't know that we're together. Jeff's parents know and they don't mind. We just found each other and I don't want to push my luck. "
"What took you so long?" Kurt asked.
"What do you mean?" asked Jeff.
"You've been living together for years. What took you so long to realize that you were in love?"
"Oh, that. I guess we were even more clueless than the two of you."
Blaine laughed.
"Yes, I'm known for my clueless behavior, right?" Blaine and Jeff laughed together at what seemed to be an inside joke.
"Seriously, I'm just glad the two of you finally got it together. I'm sorry that it took Pavarotti's death but I was really happy the day Blaine asked for a duet with you, Kurt," commented Jeff.
"Yes," agreed Nick. "Jeff is a huge Klaine fan. He'd never admit it but it's true."
Kurt laughed.
"Really? That's our couple name? I didn't realize we had one already."
"Couple name? We have a couple name?" asked Blaine.
"Or course we do," Kurt replied. "You know like Finchel is Rachel and Finn. Brittany and Santana are Brittana. Don't tell them, though. They think no one knows that they're are together."
"Wait, aren't Sam and Santana dating? And Artie and Brittany?"
"You are so naive, Blaine."
"Why is it Klaine?" asked Blaine. "I mean that just Blaine with a K. That doesn't sound very couplely."
"Because Blurt just sounds gross," replied Jeff. "We're Niff, by the way."
"Neff," corrected Nick.
"No, how many times do I have to tell you? It's Niff," insisted Jeff.
Blaine rolled his eyes and shook his head.
Kurt laughed and put his arm around Blaine.
"Welcome to the world of coupledom."
"I like it," said Blaine punctuating his remark with a kiss.
They enjoyed the night and Kurt made it home without incident.
April 2011
In April, Kurt and Blaine fell into a routine. It was a good routine. They'd spend the day at Dalton flirting and just being in love. They would have a heavy make-out session in Blaine's room followed by studying, dinner, a movie, or just hanging out. The Warblers continued singing for the boys of Dalton and did a few fund raisers for charities. Sometimes, Blaine would come to Lima for the evening to hang out with Kurt, Mercedes, and Rachel. Being friends with Rachel was one of the strangest things in the line for Kurt. He was used to all sorts of things changing including relationships but friendship with Rachel? That was a new one.
Kurt continued to practice jumping. He became an expert at moving between two lines that he created by flipping a coin. He flipped the coin and settled into the heads line automatically. He was proud of developing that talent. He could actually choose the line as he created it. There was a short timeless period when he felt like he was in both the heads and the tails universe. Or perhaps, it was like he was in neither - he was in some sort in between state. He couldn't hold it long. If he didn't chose, then he'd settle in one anyway. He practiced holding onto the tails universe while he was in the heads one. Eventually he would leap to the tails line. Kurt extended the time between flipping the coin and jumping to the tails universe with each practice until he could do it fifteen minutes later. That didn't seem like a long time but it was in the quantum world. In reality, by then, there were an infinite number of universes spawned from each of the two he'd created so it was like hanging on to one thread as more and more threads were added to a tapestry.
With the six sided die, it was harder but he practiced that too. He thought that he should be able to keep track of the number on the die and jump to a specific one but he never managed it. He could always get to it eventually but it was by random jumping. Kurt discovered that he had better luck if he paired the die rolls with something less abstract like a piece of jewelry. He'd put the piece that corresponded to the roll on his person and then he could successfully leap to the universe to where he was wearing a specific piece. He got very good at it after some practice. Kurt wasn't sure any of this had a useful application when he was making choices that mattered but he practiced anyway.
When Santana started scheming to get Kurt to come back to McKinley, he was ready to return. The daily commute was stressful and the allure of competing in Nationals was irresistible so he transferred back despite the pain it caused Blaine. He adjusted quickly enough. Blaine spent more time at Kurt's house and hanging out with Kurt's friends after the transfer. They didn't see each other every day during the week but it was enough. It wasn't ideal but it was enough.
10 May 2011
Kurt was excited about prom. It was his dream to go to prom with his boyfriend and dance like any other couple. He hadn't thought that he'd ever be able to but things were calm at McKinley. With the new reformed Dave Karofsky, Kurt's life was the best it had ever been. He just needed to officially ask his boyfriend. He couldn't imagine that Blaine might not want to go.
"Give me your hand. Blaine Warbler, will you go to junior prom with me?"
"Prom?"
"It'll be the social event of the season," Kurt said excitedly. Then he noticed the expression on Blaine's face. "You don't want to go to prom with me?"
"No, no, no, of course, of course I want to go with you! It's just…prom."
"What about prom, Blaine?"
"At my old school, there was a Sadie Hawkins dance, and…I had just come out. So I asked a friend of mine, the only other gay guy in the school. While we were waiting for his dad to pick us up, these three guys, um, beat the living crap out of us."
"I…I-I'm so sorry."
Kurt had been with Blaine-5 for two months and despite being able to determine that the split between Blaine-4 and Blaine-5 had happened sometime before Blaine had come to Dalton, he'd never found out what exactly that defining moment was. He had no doubt now that this incident was it. It hadn't happened to the others. He was sure it wasn't just that Blaine had never talked about it before. This Blaine had a pain and sadness that Kurt finally understood.
"I'm…I'm out and I'm proud and all, this is just still a bit of a sore spot."
"This is perfect. You couldn't face up to the bullies at your school, so you can do it at mine. We could do it together. But I have to say, Blaine, that if it makes you uncomfortable at all, we'll just forget about prom. We'll go to a movie instead."
"I am crazy about you." Kurt heart soared at the words.
"So I'll take that as a yes?"
"Yes. You and I are going to the prom."
12 May 2011
When Burt and Blaine ganged up on him regarding his perfect prom outfit, Kurt was livid. His dad, he understood. Burt didn't get fashion and he didn't get Kurt. The man had worn a powder blue tux with a ruffled shirt and a big velour bowtie! Of course, he didn't get the look Kurt was going for.
Kurt had said that he understood if Blaine didn't want to go but he didn't really. He threw himself face down on the bed and buried his head into his pillow. Blaine followed him into the room and sat on the floor by the bed.
"Kurt, I'm sorry. I love your kilt. I do. You look fantastic."
"Go away."
"Don't be like that. Look at me."
Kurt didn't look up.
"You know those boots are so sexy." Blaine leaned in and whispered into Kurt's ear, "When you twirled around the way you did, I couldn't take my eyes off of your ass. I'm so hard; I can barely think of anything but what you have under that kilt."
Kurt finally met his boyfriend's yes and smiled.
"You have a filthy mind and a filthy mouth, Blaine."
"Do you want to see what I can do with my filthy mouth?" Blaine asked with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows.
"No," said Kurt sitting up. "No, I want to know why you are so afraid."
"I told you."
"There's more, isn't there? That's not going to happen to us. I have friends and my bother. They aren't going to let that happen. Tell me what happened, Blaine. It was worse than you've let on, wasn't it? What happened to your friend? He's the one you told me about before, isn't he? The one that you wanted to be more than friends with."
"Yeah. Like I said, we'd been best friends since the sixth grade. When we came out to each other, I thought we'd be more. I think maybe he wanted that too but we never had a chance. The daily taunting and harassment was bad enough but we went to the dance anyway. We were so stupid. I was so stupid. I wanted to go. It was bad, Kurt. There was so much blood and pain and I couldn't do anything. They were all bigger and there were so many of them. I couldn't protect him. We both ended up in the hospital but he got the worst of it. I had some broken bones but they healed. He'll never be the same, Kurt. They hit him so hard, over and over again. He had severe brain damage and he'll never have a normal life. He can walk and talk but he gets confused so easily. He can't read any more. It all my fault Kurt. It happened because I wanted to flaunt being gay in front of everyone."
Tears were falling down Blaine's face. Kurt took his boyfriend's face in his hands and looked him in the eyes.
"It's not your fault. It isn't. How do you know they wouldn't have done that after school even if you hadn't gone to the dance? How do you know what they would have done? They were capable of that so they did it. Don't blame yourself."
"Even my father blamed me."
"What?"
"He said I ruined Shaun's life. That I murdered him with my perverted desires. He said that Shaun's mother would still have her son if I weren't such a..."
"He's wrong. You know he's wrong, Blaine. You have to know that."
"He said that I was a filthy perverted faggot and if I hadn't been thinking with my dick, no one would have been hurt," Blaine managed to choke out through his tears.
"And you said your father wasn't a bad person? What kind of father says that to his son? After getting beaten like that? You loved Shaun, didn't you? It happened to you, too. How could anyone say those things when you went through it, too?"
Blaine couldn't answer so Kurt took him in his arms and pulled him onto the bed with him. They lay together without talking for a long while. Kurt occasionally made comforting noises but there was nothing more to be said. He hated his useless power more than ever in that moment. There was absolutely nothing he could do to spare Blaine this pain. He could only find a different one that never had to endure this but he couldn't take it away from this Blaine. It still happened.
They went to the prom and they conquered their fears together. Kurt owned the crown that was supposed to be an insult. He took their taunt and turned it into an honor. It hurt like hell but he didn't run and neither did Blaine.
25 May 2011
The New Directions checked into the hotel for National and with just two days before their first elimination round, they were completely unprepared. Not only had they not rehearsed but they didn't even have a set list.
Kurt was too excited about the prospect of being in New York to care. He wanted to win and Mr. Shue had assured them that they had a real chance at it. They had talent on their side so they spent the first day site seeing instead of writing. Mr. Shue was completely MIA anyway so it was impossible to take their so called lock down seriously. They spent time people watching in Central Park. Of course, for Kurt people watching took on a different aspect from everyone else. He picked out a man walking along minding his own business and saw in another line that he stopped to take a call, in another, he barely dodged a run in with a bicycle messenger as he was texting, one more he didn't dodge the messenger. That probably ruined his whole day in that line and yet in Kurt's line, he just kept walking. Kurt wondered if his entire life might have been changed by that run in with the bike. Kurt could do the same thing in Ohio but some how watching people in New York was a whole new level of fun.
27 May 2011
They all stared at the ranking board in disbelief. Twelfth place. In hindsight, they should have been grateful they were ranked that high. They were used to pulling things together at the last minute and had no work ethic or guidance to speak of. Kurt knew it in his head but he was heartsick at the loss. He stared at the board looking for higher placement but in all the lines he could see, New Directions was even lower on the board. He couldn't see anything higher. He didn't dare jump anyway. He couldn't unless he was sure he wouldn't lose Blaine.
Then he saw it. The Warblers. They were listed number six on the board. He looked up from the board and he was drawn to the line like a magnet. There was Blaine and Kurt was with him. Blaine threw his arms around the alternate Kurt and leaned in to kiss him. Kurt didn't think. If he'd had, he wouldn't have done it. If he'd thought, he knew he shouldn't have done it. It was just a lousy trophy as Blaine had told him. But he didn't think, he leapt and found himself in Blaine's arms a fraction of a second before Blaine's lips met his. He kissed his boyfriend back enthusiastically only to be shocked when Blaine pushed him away, shaking his head, eyes wide with surprise.
"Kurt," Blaine whispered shaking his head. "We can't. Jeff. I'm sorry."
Before Kurt could reply, Nick pulled Kurt out of Blaine's arms with a glare. Kurt looked around and saw all the other Warblers still hugging each other and clapping each other on the back, seeming to be unaware of the drama. Just then Jeff arrived with a bag of pretzels in his hand.
"Guys! You were supposed to wait for me before looking! I take it we placed?"
"Of course, we placed sweetie," said Blaine putting his arm around his boyfriend. Jeff leaned down and kissed Blaine. Kurt felt sick. How could he have been so stupid? Kurt slowly became aware of Nick's tightening grip on his arm as the boy dragged him away from the rest of the Warblers.
"What did you think you were doing, Hummel?"
"Blaine kissed me. You can't blame me for that."
"That's not what it looked like to me. Jeff is my best friend and I'm not going to stand idly by while you try to steal his boyfriend. I don't get it, Kurt. You don't even like Blaine. You're always whining about what a diva he is and how he gets all the solos. What's your game?"
"I don't have a game," Kurt hissed. "What is your deal? Why do you care so much about Jeff's feelings? Is it because you're in love with him? Maybe I'd be doing you a favor by breaking them up."
Kurt was just guessing but he didn't believe Nick could be so different that he didn't love Jeff. Something had gone wrong in this universe that they weren't together but he was sure it must be true. But as soon as he said it, he saw the truth in Nick's eyes. He'd hit a nerve. Kurt shook Nick off of his arm and turned back to the Warblers. He tried looking for the line he'd just come from but he knew it was too late. There were too many lines with the New Directions here and without Blaine to anchor him, he couldn't see clearly enough to choose. He was stuck here. He'd lost the boy that he loved for a fucking trophy.
Maybe not he thought as he watched Jeff and Blaine together. Blaine had kissed him after all. There must be something going on between them.
"Warblers, Warblers, listen up," announced Wes. "We did fine today but we still have to make the top five in tomorrow's elimination. You're free tonight but I want everyone in the lobby at 7:30 am sharp. We need to rehearse for tomorrow afternoon's set. In the mean time, enjoy our win and stay out of trouble."
Thad sidled up to Kurt and said with a grin, "Come on, let's go get dinner, we can't be late tonight."
"We're going out to dinner?"
"Well, we're not ordering room service again."
Kurt did what he did best in these situations. He went along until he could get his bearings. He knew this line had to have split from the last one before Regionals back in March. How much further than that he'd have to so some research to find out. In the meantime, he just followed Thad's lead. They went to the room that they shared and changed out of their uniforms for dinner before catching a cab. Thad dressed in an expensive but conservative suit.
Thad chattered on as they sat in the posh restaurant they'd taken a cab too. Kurt got the impression the he and Thad were close in this universe, which was somehow less strange than being friends with Rachel.
"Don't you think we really delivered today, Kurt? I think our performance was stellar."
"I'm sure that we doo oped behind Blaine perfectly."
"Angel, don't be like that."
Angel?
Thad took Kurt's hand and said, "You know I can't give you solos just because you're my boyfriend." Then he brought Kurt's hand to his lips and Kurt nearly jumped just to avoid enduring it. He was Thad's boyfriend? He couldn't imagine how that had happened. He was so uptight. So...straitlaced. Kurt was in a bizarro universe. It had to happen eventually. This was his punishment.
"Kurt, what's wrong? I can tell something is bothering you."
"Blaine. Blaine is bothering me," Kurt answered truthfully. Thad had opened up the topic of Blaine's solos so he figured it was a safe topic.
"This isn't just about the solos is it?"
"What do you think?"
Thad smiled and kissed Kurt's hand again.
"I think you are beautiful when you get paranoid and jealous. I've told you a million times that I'm over Blaine. I just give him solos because it's what's best for the Warblers. I have to think of the team."
Kurt latched on to this information. The line wasn't so different after all.
"But you were in love with him. How do I know that you don't still feel that way?"
"It was just a crush. A silly crush that evaporated the minute you walked into my life, Kurt. The day you came into Dalton on that adorable spying mission was the best day of my life. I forgot about Blaine the minute I laid eyes on you."
"The minute? Are you saying you believe in love at first sight? How romantic."
"Maybe, it wasn't until you poured your heart out to me over coffee," he countered with a smile. Then his expression turned serious. "But I mean it. I love you, Kurt. Only you. I promise."
Kurt didn't know what to say. He supposed he should say it back but he couldn't. He loved Blaine. It was clear that he and Thad had a history here but he just couldn't feel it.
"Are you excited about tonight?" Thad enthused, ignoring Kurt failure to return his I love you.
"Of course I am," chirped Kurt hoping that wasn't some kind of sexual insinuation.
"I know. Front row seats to Wicked! It's my favorite musical," Thad beamed.
"Mine too!" exclaimed Kurt actually meaning his words for once.
"Look at the time. We'd better get the check and get out of here."
By the end of the play the two boys were crying unabashedly. Thad put his head on Kurt's shoulder and Kurt obliged him by putting his arm around the older boy. They both knew the entire play by heart but that didn't stop them from being moved by it. When the lights came up, Thad pulled away, took a handkerchief from his pocket and attempted to regain some composure.
"It's OK, everyone was crying," Kurt assured him.
Thad leaned in a whispered, "You're so beautiful right now."
To Kurt's relief, he didn't try to kiss him. Thad didn't seem to be one for PDA.
"And now for the best part," promised Thad.
"How can it get better?"
"We're going back stage to meet the cast."
He squealed. Kurt couldn't help it. Meeting the cast of Wicked. How could he not enjoy it? It was a talent he had - accepting the line he was in and living in the moment. He was always able to let go of what he'd lost quickly. He would go insane otherwise.
Apparently, Thad was a VIP because they were expected back stage. The cast members introduced themselves and Kurt gushed enthusiastically about their performances, the play, and New York. He didn't even know what he was saying half the time.
"Defying Gravity is my favorite song of all time," Kurt explained.
"You should hear him sing it," said Thad proudly. "He sang for his audition for our glee club, the Warblers. He has the voice of an angel."
"Really? You can hit a high F?" asked Teal, the actress who played Elphaba.
"I can," Kurt said confidently.
"Every time?"
"Every time," he insisted.
"Let's hear it then, kid. I want to see this. You can sing it on the stage."
"Stop teasing the boy, T," said Richard.
"I'll do," said Kurt breathlessly. "I swear that I can do it. Just give me a chance." His eyes were bright and shining. He couldn't believe this was really happening. He was going to sing Defying Gravity for the cast. It was better than singing For Good with Rachel. It had just been the two of them.
He stepped out on the stage and began singing when the music cued up. He hit the high F without a thought. It just came out pure and perfect like the moment.
"Well, good thing for me that there isn't a demand for boys playing Elphaba," joked Teal. "You're talented, kid. You're gonna be a star some day."
Kurt barely remembered the ride back to the hotel.
"So that was better than breakfast at Tiffany's, wasn't it?" asked Thad as he hung his jacket in the closet.
Apparently, they'd done that too. Of course they had. Kurt was beginning to appreciate that he had a great deal in common with Thad. Perhaps it wasn't that surprising that they were together.
"I'm going to shower first if that's OK with you."
"Sure," agreed Kurt distractedly.
Thad embraced him laying soft kisses on his face then kissed Kurt gently on the lips. He did his best to respond but there was no spark. It wasn't anything like the electric thrill he felt when he kissed Blaine. "You were amazing tonight. I don't think I've ever heard that sung more beautifully."
"You're just saying that because I'm your boyfriend," Kurt teased.
"No. I just wish the Warblers could showcase your voice. You are better than Blaine. It's just...show choir isn't just about who has the better voice. I wish it were so pure."
"Don't worry about that. I understand. Go take your shower."
Kurt found his laptop while Thad was in the shower a began piecing together the history of this line. He sat at the desk, occasionally eying the king sized bed nervously. He was going to be sleeping with another boy for the first time in his life and it was Thad. What if they were having sex? He was just going to have to plead headache because he just couldn't. He wasn't going to lose his virginity to a boy he didn't even know. He and Blaine had gotten as far as blow-jobs but he wasn't ready more and when he was, it would be with someone he loved. Hopefully, Blaine.
Thad came out of the bathroom in blue silk pajamas. At least, he wasn't naked, thought Kurt with relief. He came over to Kurt and pulled him into a hug.
"We should get some sleep. It's really important that we bring our best game. I know you need to do your skin care routine so do you mind if I go ahead and take a sleeping pill? I'm never going to get to sleep tonight without it."
"Of course, I don't mind," Kurt agreed with relief. "Do what you need to. You are absolutely right. We need to focus on the competition and nothing else."
Thad's expression was unreadable but Kurt thought he was a little suspicious. Hopefully, he'd just chalk Kurt's strangeness up to nerves. Thad got into bed, took his pill, pulled a sleep mask over his eyes and headphones over his ears. Apparently, he had trouble sleeping.
Kurt finished his own nightly routine and slipped into the bed on the other side. He continued his research into the line he was stuck with. Apparently, he and Thad had been together since November. Kurt guessed that somehow, when he'd gone to coffee with the Warblers, it had been Thad instead of Blaine who had bonded with him. He wasn't as far off from Blaine-5 as he'd feared. The split seemed to be some time after the beginning of the current school year which meant he was in a line with a Blaine that had been through the beating. Carol and Burt were married. He looked through the wedding pictures and they were very similar to the ones in the previous line. The differences were subtle but apparent. Burt and Carol had gotten married in November as they had in the last line. Finn and Rachel were together.
He delved into Nick, Jeff, and Blaine's history and discovered that Blaine and Jeff had been dating since mid-September. Even if he'd met Blaine the day he went to spy on the Warblers, he'd already been in a relationship so, of course, they hadn't become close.
Finally, he dared to look at pictures of himself with Thad. It looked like they were happy together. It unnerved him to think about this alternate life. He didn't remember it and he'd never really been able to wrap his head around the intractable question - what happened to the Kurt who been living it before he got here? And worse, what happen when he left? Yeah, some things were just better left unexamined.
Kurt had two courses of action before him. Make it through the competition, then look for a line where he and Blaine were together once he returned to Lima or...