Honey why you calling me so late?

Spencer swore to herself, who the fuck was calling her at 3 in the morning. Whoever this is better have a good excuse she was having an Ashley dream. Carefully untangling herself from the body next to her picking up her cell phone on the way the blonde stumbled out of the room. Grabbing her robe in the process and swinging it on. Silencing the ringing hoping she hadn't awaken the figure lying in the bed. She looked down her eyes squinting still from sleep. But her frown slowly smoothed out into a smile when she saw who the caller was.

Flipping the phone she held it close to her ear and curled up in the arm chair in the living room smiling like a gossipy girl.

"Hey Ash. What's up. It's 3 in the morning!!"

She giggled and smiled happily when hearing the angelic voice.

"Sorry babe did I wake you?"


It's kinda hard to talk right now.

"Yeah but it's okay," Spencer whispered quietly peeking into the bedroom. "Good thing Jonica's a heavy sleeper."

She couldn't help but smile to herself at the light growl she heard on the other end at the mention of the name of her current girlfriend.


Honey why are you crying? Is everything okay?

"Yeah, real great." Spencer could sense the sarcasm. A part of her knew that Ashley wished she would tell Jonica about them. But she couldn't bear to simply hand her heart over to the brunette again. It hurt too much when she broke it. It was then that Spencer realized Ashley's tone. After so many midnight calls she knew Ashley's talks. The way her voice sounded when she smiled, before she giggled, when she was angry, resentful, and worse the way her voice trembled when Ashley was crying.

"Baby what's wrong?" Spencer couldn't help as her voice came out louder than she expected.


I gotta whisper 'cause I can't be too loud

Slapping herself lightly on the forehead for her carelessness Spencer peeked again. She saw Jonica squirm a little in her sleep. Throw her arm over at where Spencer's side and feel the empty space. Holding her breath she watched the short haired girl frown but fall back asleep.

Well, my girl's in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on

"Nothing Spence. Nothing. I'm fine." She could hear Ashley's resistance to the tears in her tone. "How are you love?"

Spencer smiled lightly and stared at her legs. She hated these times. When she knew Ashley was hurting and she couldn't be there to hold her.

"I'm fine I guess. Jonica just realized I'm not in bed. I think she thinks I went to the bathroom."

Spencer looked down at herself again. Ashley used to jolt up in bed when she so much as slipped out of their embrace. She wanted to tell Ashley, tell her everything. That she still loved her. That she wished sometimes it was Ashley sleeping beside her in bed. Instead she simply said, "I wish you were here. I don't think I ever got over you Ash." The last part was whispered. Meant for her ears only but she heard Ashley's breathing hitch a little.

"I don't think I did either Spence. I miss you."

A comfortable silence settled for a few minutes. Spencer could spend hours simply listening to the brunette breathing.


It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

The two woman couldn't help but smile to themselves thinking about how wonder it was to be able to say each other's names. Hear it from the other's lips. Spencer could say it and not have a fight with Jonica. Ashley could say it without people telling her to get over it.

The two thinking the same things as they both remembered how soft it was to kiss each other. To be close to each other.

Ashley felt her knees buckle beneath her and she sank down on the couch behind her.

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

Watching Jonica reach over again patting the still empty spot Spencer panicked a little. Praying to all lesbian idols that her girlfriend would keep sleeping. She didn't want to hang up. She wanted to stay up all night listening to Ashley's voice. Spencer never though she would be one to cheat. But she couldn't help it. Who could turn their back on a woman like Ashley?

It's funny that you're calling me tonight
And, yes, I've dreamt of you too

Suddenly the brunette started giggling. Not knowing what she's found so funny but the blonde couldn't help but laugh along with her.

"What?" Spencer asked biting her lip to keep her giggles muffled.

"Nothing it's just so weird. I was having a dream about you and I woke up 'cause Aiden started squishing me and now I'm talking to you. I don't know. You were speaking in a helium cartoony voice in the dream."

Spencer's smile had faltered at the mention of Aiden's name. The same way she could hear Ashley's smile fall at the mention of Jonica.

"Yeah I was dreaming out you too…in a non helium voice way." Spencer tried to keep the conversation light but just as she knew Ashley's tones. The brunette knew hers.


And does he know you're talking to me
Will it start a fight
No I don't think she has a clue

Realizing her mistake Ashley backtracked now wishing she hadn't said his name.

"He doesn't know I'm talking to you." Ashley said, assuring the blonde.

"No… I know that." Spencer nodded to herself in the dark room holding back her tears now remembering that there was someone that could hold Ashley when she was sad. It just wasn't her.

"Spence you know he would understand, he knows that we're still friends. Besides he sleeps like the dead."

Well my girl's in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on

"How's yours doing?"

Spence smiled lightly. It was weird but at times she and Ashley referred to Jonica and Aiden as, "yours." It's almost as if they were side-stepping the words "girlfriend," and "boyfriend."

She looked once again. Jonica had finally taken that Spencer had been out of bed far too long and finally gotten up and was now throwing a large t-shirt over her naked frame. And it made Spencer sick what she had done a few hours ago with her.


It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

"Spencer?" Ashley quarried. The blonde had been silent for a while.

"Yeah?" Spencer's voice told the brunette her blonde was close to tears.

"What's wrong Spencer?"

"I miss you Ashley. I can't do this. I can't be with her and think about you constantly."

Spencer hyperventilated for a while her voice still as quiet as she could keep it for now Jonica was looking in the bedroom bathroom calling out to her.

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

Know would have been a great time to hang up and turn on the television and play it off that she couldn't sleep. But still not finding the strength to hang up Spencer fearfully muttered, "she's looking for me."

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak

"Spencer hang up." Ashley's voice was calm, it wasn't commanding. A simple statement. Almost as if it were a test.

"Spencer?" Ashley asked once again after a long silence.

"I don't want to." Spencer sounded like a lost child.

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

"Spencer." Ashley's voice was urgent. She wanted to be with Spencer. But she couldn't force Spencer. And a part of her wanted to know Spencer's choice. So as terrible as it was she was going to see what happened. Spencer could either hang up on her or tell Jonica.

And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

"Spencer?" Jonica poked her head into the living room. Spotting the dark figure of her girlfriend on the couch she smiled. "There you are. I was beginning to worry."

"I'm right here." Spencer's voice was barely audible.

Honey why you calling me so late?

"I love you."

Ashley heard. Then what came next broke her heart.

"I'll talk to you later Chels." Then she hung up.

She stared blankly at her phone. Not hanging it up yet. Her tears silently rolling down her face in the darkness of the room she heaved, shuddering as she silently sobbed.

The dial tone droned on loudly in the silence of the room. Encasing the room in it's monotonous tone. It was like a heart flat line and Ashley felt as if her heart had indeed stopped beating. For it had been beating before simply for one reason the hope of Spencer. But now that too had left her.

Spencer had chosen.