11. This Is The Life
'Sam?'
There was a small pause. 'Quinn…?'
'Yeah, it's me.'
He chuckled. 'So much for letting me know how it went.'
'I'm letting you know now.'
'So…what happened…?' He asked hopefully.
'She's with someone else now.'
The other voice at the end of the line went quiet. 'Oh…'
'I thought I had a chance. But I don't.'
'Did she tell you straight away?'
'Tell me what?'
'That she's with someone else dummy! Did she tell you straight away?'
'No…'
'Exactly.'
'What?'
'You still have a shot.'
'No I don't, Sam. It's over now. Her girlfriend walked in on us.' She responded with resounding defeat.
'You mean you actually got somewhere with her?' He suddenly squeaked excitedly.
'Just kissing.' She sighed in response.
'You can't give up Quinn. Not now. You've flown across states to see her. That obviously means something to her.'
'She's with someone else now. She's happy now.'
'And what about you, Quinn? Are you happy?'
'I'm happy she's happy.'
He grumbled. 'Don't even try to feed me that Quinn. That's bullshit and you know it. You're miserable I can hear it in your voice.'
'Then tell me Sam, what am I supposed to do?' She almost yelled.
'I can't tell you that, only you know that. Just remember, everything will be okay in the end…'
She gasped. '…if it's not okay, it's not the end…' She interrupted finishing for him. Her mojo began to return. 'Sam thank you, you're a genius!'
He chuckled confused. 'You're welcome…?'
An idea hit her like a lightning bolt. 'I'll call you.'
She could hear his schoolboy grin. 'You better.'
She ran as fast as she could, her feet pounding the rain sodden pavement, this time filled with determination. She ran the three blocks back, and she found herself standing once again on Rachel's apartment building stoop. She buzzed the button labelled 4F and after a few long seconds a crackle sounded.
'Hello…?' It was Jess' voice.
She hadn't bargained on Jess still being there after what she saw. Quinn sighed and didn't respond, she knew there was no point in even trying to talk to her, yet she didn't wanna give up. She couldn't give up. Her princess was still in the tower, she just had to scale the castle walls.
So instead she waited. She leaned against the wall and slid down until her ass hit the damp stone stoop. Sam's words echoed through her head, giving her encouragement. She waited until her ass went numb and cold from the damp air surrounding her. Her blonde fringe stuck to her forehead, and her hair was limp from the rain.
'Well you look like shit…' A young guy with dark curly hair and glasses laughed looking down at her.
She looked up and after a pause her brain flicked to 'on' mode. 'Yeah, I locked myself out and I can't get in…'
The guy held out his hand, and he pulled her up with a slight chuckle. 'I do that a lot too. What apartment you in?'
'4F.' She replied quickly. 'I guess my roommate is out, she's used to me forgetting my key so she normally lets me in.'
He jangled his keys in his pocket, still half listening until he realised. His face lit up. 'Oh you're in with Rachel Berry…?'
She smiled back. 'Yep, lucky me!' She chuckled.
He held the heavy white door open for her as they both slid inside the apartment building. 'Thanks.' She smiled sheepishly.
He veered off to the left. 'No problem…?'
She smiled reaching out her hand. 'Quinn. My name is Quinn.'
He shook her hand with a warm smile, the kind that's not too common in New York. 'Nice to meet you Quinn, I'm Blaine.' He shifted the paper bag of groceries under his left arm. 'I better get these inside, tell Rachel I said hello?'
She nodded. 'Sure thing.'
Without another word he disappeared behind the elevator shaft and she stepped inside, beginning her painfully slow ascent to 4F.
She knocked three times slowly to try and disguise it was her behind the door, golden writing staring 4F straight into her face. The door flung open, and she saw Rachel's tear-stained face. Just as quickly as it opened, she tried to slam the door again but Quinn jammed her right foot in the way, her big toe getting slightly battered in the process – but she had bigger things to worry about.
She spoke despite only being able to see Rachel's forehead as she lowered her head and whispered as if it were a delicate secret.
'Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end…'
Rachel's head jerked up in recognition, her fingers letting go of their death grip on the doorframe. The door was flung back again, Jess standing at Rachel's side.
'You…' She practically hissed. Quinn was half expecting Medusa to pop out of her hair. 'It was you at the buzzer…'
'Rachel…' She ignored the taller brunette attempting to bore hot beams into her soul.
'Get out Quinn and never come back.' Jess seethed.
'Rachel…' She tried again. The small brunette was looking everywhere but at her. She felt as if she was being suffocated, she just needed one look from the brunette.
'Quinn!' Jess finally roared. Rachel's head snapped to Quinn's face as she looked at Jess. Her face turned back to Rachel and their eyes connected. Her chest hitched and she felt those deep brown pools re-inflate her.
She whipped back to Jess. 'Shut it butch. I'm here to talk to Rachel.'
Jess stepped in front of Rachel, almost nose to nose with Quinn. 'Leave.' She snarled.
Eyes never left hers. Quinn let a smile curl around the right side of her lips. 'Make me.'
Suddenly Quinn heard a high pitched screech as she felt a hard blow to her face. She opened her eyes, looking down her fingers were covered in deep crimson liquid. She looked up and Rachel was screaming at Jess, although Quinn couldn't take in what she was saying, the pulsing pain in her face taking her attention. She closed her eyes again, and when she opened them those brown moons were mere inches away, staring deep into her. Rachel swept a strand of blonde hair away from Quinn's right eye. She wrapped the fingers of her right hand around the flattened girl's hand and pulled her to her feet.
'Let's get you cleaned up.'
As Rachel dabbed under Quinn's delicate nose with a damp washcloth, the blonde smiled.
Rachel pulled back slightly. 'What…?'
'You remember.' She smiled at her.
'Remember what…?'
'Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end…'
At that she dumped the washcloth in the porcelain sink behind Quinn and distanced herself. She shook her head, refusing to look at her. 'You can't just turn up here after all this time and say things like that.'
'But you remember. You can't deny that you don't remember.'
'Of course I remember!' She laughed. 'It was our graduation!'
Quinn looked down at her rain-sodden Converse before looking back up again. She watched Rachel look everywhere in that bathroom but at her.
'I wouldn't take it back y'know.'
Her eyes drifted over to Quinn's. 'Take what back?'
'Any of it.' She shook her head. 'I'd never take any of it back because it's what got me standing right here,' She chuckled lightly looking down 'with a bloody nose, in your bathroom.'
Rachel sighed. 'Well I'm glad you're having such a good fucking time.' Quinn looked over to her.
Rachel waved her arms exasperated. 'I'm pretty sure I just lost the only person who has actually meant something to me recently.' At that, Quinn burst out laughing, real belly-shaking laughter. The smaller girl glared at her.
'Don't even try to pretend to me that's true.'
'You're good at that aren't you?' She fired back. 'Breaking up relationships…'
'You're gonna play the Puck card? Really?' She scoffed. 'You know what really happened.'
'You kissed me. You had a girlfriend.'
'You had Puck.'
'Noah was your best friend.'
'You kissed me first.'
'Oh you're really gonna get that petty are you? What happened to 'see me one more time and I'll leave you alone'…? Huh…?'
'Look what happened. I saw you and look what happened. There's more between us and you know it.'
'It was a mistake.' Her expression was unreadable. Quinn knew she couldn't give up now. Not now. She could hear Sam's voice in the back of her head, encouraging her.
'You know it wasn't a mistake.' She watched her, trying to make her look back. She knew if she could just get Rachel to look at her she still had a chance.
As if in slow motion, those brown pools drifted towards her own eyes.
'I miss you.' Rachel responded with a sigh.
Quinn felt a rising warmth beginning to encase her chest.
'I miss you. The old you.' The brunette shook her head and briefly closed her eyes. When they opened back up again they glittered with restricted tears. 'I don't know who you are anymore. You're just another stranger to me now.'
That rising warmth quickly turned ice cold.