The rest of the night was bittersweet. Fiona told Holly J about what happened on the ferris wheel and her friend seemed genuinely happy for her. Their twosome became a trio as Imogen joined them, the three of them walking the Frostival circuit, riding rides, eating horrible carnival food and enjoying themselves. As the night drew to a close, Fiona knew she would have to say goodbye to Imogen. "I'll be in the car." Holly J whispered into her friend's ear, removing her hand from the other girl's shoulder and slinking off to the parking lot. This left Imogen and Fiona alone, both looking somberly at one another.
"Let's sit." Fiona suggested, gesturing to the bench nearby.
"Okay." Imogen's voice was tiny in comparison to Fiona's. But the two of them took a seat on the cold bench, and Fiona's hand found her friend's as she struggled to think of what to say. She was never very good at goodbyes.
"I'll be back." She began with a smile, trying to remind Imogen of her promise to try to make things work. She couldn't guarantee it, but she would try her best. Imogen offered her a hesitant smile, as if she didn't believe her. "I will. I don't know what this is between us, but I want to stick around to figure that out. I know it sucks we have to be apart for winter break but maybe it'll give us both time to think. And we'll totally talk all the time."
"I guess. It's just...I just came to terms with my feelings. I don't want to lose my chance before it even begins." Imogen sounded defeated. She sighed, dropping Fiona's hand and not meeting her eyes. Instead her gaze was fixed on the frozen ground below. "And with the time away, you'll probably realize that you don't like me that way, and you'll have no reason to come back to Degrassi. I'll lose you forever." Fiona looked like she was about to interrupt, but the younger girl gave her a stern look as if to say she wasn't finished. "You know I don't make friends easily. You, Eli, you're kind of the only friends I have. And you know just as well as I do that if Eli gets back with Clare..." She was referring to the shared kiss the rumor mill had been spitting out. "Then I'll be history. I'll be back with no one. This isn't just about me liking you. It's about me wanting to be your friend. I'm sick of not being good enough for anyone."
"You are though. Don't tell yourself that, okay? You're an awesome person. Honestly? I've never met anyone like you before." Fiona admitted with a slight smile. Her hand found Imogen's knee. She knit her eyebrows together. "It's been a long time since I've liked someone this much. I'll find a way to make it work."
Imogen sighed. "Holly J's waiting."
"You're right." Fiona stood up, shoving her hands into her coat pockets. "But you know what? I'm not leaving until ten tomorrow. If you're up for it, maybe you could meet us at the loft and come with us to the airport. I'd..like it if you did."
"Okay."
"So you'll be there?" The curly haired girl asked seriously.
"I will be there." Imogen smiled lightly. She watched as Fiona turned on her heels and began to walk away, her boots clomping loudly as she headed in the direction of the parking lot. Looking down, Imogen noticed a few pieces of paper and she picked them up, recognizing Fiona's handwriting on this pile of notecards. With a curious expression, she read fervently.
Holly J sat inside the vehicle, the heat blasting as she tried to warm herself up. Turning the knob to defrost, she waited for the windshield to thaw and sighed, her hands gripping the steering wheel. As happy as Fiona seemed, she knew that her friend was making a mistake. Staying at Degrassi for Imogen was selfish, especially when her family needed her. She was trying to be supportive, but it was difficult for her, and so she hadn't said much throughout the night. It wasn't that she didn't like Imogen. The girl seemed sweet, albeit a little unusual, but she didn't really seem like Fiona's type. All they had right now was a mild flirtation and a couple of shared kisses, not something worth abandoning a struggling family over, but Holly J would never dream of telling Fiona what to do. She hoped that she could subtly steer her friend in the right direction over the next few weeks.
She was jolted from her thoughts when she heard a knock on the window. Holly J jumped but then remembered Fiona was meeting her and she unlocked the car, smiling softly when the brunette got into the passenger seat beside her. She quickly closed the door, her teeth chattering.
"Brrr. It's freezing out there." She commented, raising her hands to the vents to try and regain sensation in her fingers.
"How'd it go?" Holly J questioned, glancing over at her friend.
"Okay, I guess." She seemed lost in her own thoughts. Holly J leaned over and put her hand on the other girl's shoulder.
"So you said goodbye?"
"Not...exactly." At Holly J's quizzical look, she continued. "I might have invited her to come with us to the airport tomorrow? I just-she looked so...I couldn't say goodbye."
"You're going to have to." Holly J sounded forceful and Fiona looked at her with mild confusion. She wondered why her best friend was being so insensitive.
"I know that, but I don't want to think about it right now, okay?"
"Fi, I'm just trying to be realistic here." Her voice was gentler this time.
"One of us has to be." Fiona murmured.
Holly J couldn't bear seeing her best friend hurt. She pulled her arms around her tightly, the gear shift uncomfortable between them. Fiona's head rested in the crook of her neck and she sighed before pulling away. "We should go." She suggested, reaching for her seatbelt. Nodding, Holly J did the same before putting the car in reverse, deftly pulling out of her parking spot and shifting gears again to get them on their way to the loft. Neither of them spoke, the radio playing softly as Holly J drove, her hands gripping the steering wheel so hard that her knuckles were white. She tried her best to concentrate on the road instead of the lingering feeling of guilt in her mind.