AN: SM owns Twilight.

Warning, surrogacy is not necessarily a solution to everyone's problems, especially difficult financial ones.

Chapter two.

I pulled up Bertha, my old red truck in the Cullen's driveway and took a deep breath.

They lived in an insanely, beautiful house with perfectly, manicured gardens, the three storey building was all glass and sharp, white lines, set at interesting, architecturally correct angles.

I bet anything, this house has been featured in 'Architecture Monthly'.

Huh, they had plenty of money.

Although I already knew this fact, it still hit me hard in the gut. I couldn't stop looking at all the well maintained perfection in front of me.

I sighed, and looked at my face in the rear-view mirror.

I looked so very tired and worn out. I had no makeup, and only just managed to skip home quickly from the hospital, shower, brush my wild mass of hair and change into some clean clothes.

I hoped I didn't look too much out of place...oh, who was I trying to kid!

Of course I looked out of place!

I was always going to be... a round peg in a square hole... I was never going to fit in, no matter what I did!

I took another deep breath and focused.

I can do this!

Something might still happen, to change me from going down this path.

An almighty miracle perhaps?

OK! I can do this!

Get yourself together Bella and open the damn door!

Now get out and close the door.

Now turn around and move your legs ...my limbs felt so heavy and didn't want to co-operate with my mind.

Everything felt like it was grinding heavily in slow motion.

Everything except my heart... it was beating so fast it was about to jump out of my chest.

I tried to calm myself by taking some slow, deep breaths. It didn't seem to help.

The palatial front door opened, and there stood Esme Cullen, wearing a smile and an apron.

It was too late to run away now.

I gave a half-hearted wave and she came down the steps and took my hand. I didn't realize that I was shaking so much until I felt her warm, smooth hand holding my shaking, rough one in-between hers.

"Don't worry Bella hon; I'm not going to bite you! It's been quite a while since I've seen you; you've been away studying in California haven't you? I'm so sorry to hear about your father being ill. I've always liked Charlie, he's a good man."

I tried to nod and smile, but when she mentioned my dad, I wanted to cry again.

I'd been holding it in all day.

I held all of my emotions in tightly, while sitting there by his bed in ICU.

I held it together, while they performed all sorts of tests and hooked him up to drips and machines to monitor his heart and whatnot.

When I phoned my cleaning boss this morning, he told me to not bother coming in again. He did sack me after all.

Just when you think things can't get any worse, they do!

We walked up to the house, me shedding silent tears, and Esme's arm around my shoulder, ushering me inside out of the bitter, evening cold.

We sat down in her beautiful, designer kitchen, with the most amazing European appliances, and acres of white marble and stainless steel.

She handed me a hot drink and I numbly started drinking what was in the cup.

I sighed, and gave a small smile.

"Sorry I was all weird back there Esme. I've had a horrible day, and Dad looks like he's not going to come out of his comatose state. I think he drank a whole bottle of homemade firewater on purpose, and swallowed all of the pills on his bedside table, down with it. That's why he's now in the sorry state he's in."

He probably won't be needing the life-saving operation after all.

How Ironic!

"I thought he managed to get a deep sleep all night, I didn't hear him at all; but in reality... he had tried to end his life. I didn't suspect a thing till Doc came by to see us at seven this morning and checked in on him."

I shook my head at thought that my Dad was so very depressed and without hope.

I needed to change the subject before I started to blubber again.

"You've got a beautiful home Esme."

"Oh thank you dear, it keeps me busy, designing and decorating the house. I really would prefer a messy house full of noisy, boisterous kids; but it seems that I wasn't ever able to achieve that sadly. What I managed to make, is a show-house fit for a photo shoot in a glossy magazine."

I agreed, she did have a house that looked ready for a photo shoot.

"Well you have a great eye for design. It's very different from my tiny little home. I bet you could cook up a storm in here, with all of these fancy appliances."

"I try my best, but I'm only good for the basics. My in-laws are much finer cooks that me, my sister in law goes in for all of those elaborate dinner parties with many more courses than any normal human can possibly eat in one sitting." She giggled at the thought.

"I'm sorry I didn't bring anything along for dinner, I didn't have time. I've just managed to jump in the shower and put on some clean clothes before coming here."

"I would never expect you to cook anything Bella dear, you look to me like you need a good feeding up and a nice long sleep. I've made more than enough for us all. I hope you enjoy my homemade chicken and vegetable soup and lamb and dumpling casserole, if you want desert I can serve up some ice-cream and custard."

"Well it smells divine Esme, I'm quite starved. I forgot to eat all day with the stress and drama, so I'm sure to eat like a real glutton tonight."

The door opened to the kitchen and Carlisle strode in, he came over to Esme and they hugged and kissed.

"I'm so sorry I'm late ladies, I was kept back by another car accident, the ice has started getting bad already. Dinner smells delicious! I can't wait to eat. Bella its great to see you, and you certainly look like you need a good feed!"

"Oh I can't wait. Esme's food smells wonderful. Do you have a favourite desert?"

"Mmm, well I really love pecan pie, don't I Esme?"

"Yes, he can't get enough of it at Thanksgiving. I make it every year and he gobbles it nearly all up, I'm lucky to even get a piece!" She chuckled at him.

"Let's sit down and eat, we have so much to talk about."

Carlisle led the way to a relaxed, informal living and dining area; with a picture window that took up one whole expanse of wall, and overlooked the forest. It was beautiful.

Esme lit the candles in the centre of the round table.

"Here Bella, please take a seat and make yourself comfortable."

"Thanks, this is a lovely room, and what a view!"

We all tucked into Esme's cooking, I felt myself finally relax and start warming up. These two loved each other deeply and were sweet, kind and very gentle with each other.

I thought they would make good parents, I hoped that was so, seeing how considerate and thoughtful they were with each other.

I needed to start asking some hard questions of them, in order to confirm my thoughts.

"Umm, I know you are lovely people, but if it's ok, could I ask some uncomfortable questions of you both?"

They looked at each other and nodded.

"How do you feel about children who are disabled or who have some untreatable, congenital condition?"

They looked at each other and Esme spoke up.

"Bella I would love any child who came to me, regardless of their health or capabilities, in fact, I would be inclined to love them all the more, if they had special needs."

"Bella did you know that Esme once worked as a special ed. teacher? You loved all of your students, didn't you Essie?"

She nodded, "I still keep in touch with all of them and their families, I love to see how they are, always wondering what they are up to and how they are coping as they grow."

"Oh that's good, I was worried that if I choose to go ahead with this, that you'd be inclined to...I don't know...refuse to care for a child who wasn't completely perfect. I wouldn't feel confident; having to raise a baby on my own if you ever rejected him or her."

"Oh God no, I mean...we couldn't...we would never do such a thing! We love all babies, don't we Carlisle?"

"We only have the hope of trying this surrogacy process, and we would make sure to take great care of both you and any child who is born."

"That's good to know. So please forgive me playing the devil's advocate here, I just need to ask...what if I suffer a miscarriage? Or have a still birth? Would you ask for all of your money back? Would I return to the situation I'm now in...without work, about to have my home foreclosed and up to my eyeballs in debt for the rest of my life?"

"No we'd never do that to you, as a doctor, I know the relatively high incidence of miscarriages, but we are willing to at least try. What we need you to understand is that money isn't an issue for us. Esme is a wealthy woman, who inherited a small fortune. We would never leave you in debt. Or ask for our money back, leaving you destitute. If you start this process, we will take care of all your debts straight away."

"Tell me what you owe Bella." Esme asked.

I pulled out a notepad, on which I had written the various amounts that I knew about.

Unfortunately, there was sure to be other debts I didn't know about.

Dad was so secretive, and seemed to have no systematic filing system for paperwork, whatsoever. I was likely to find an overdue bill stuffed behind the couch cushions or in the laundry, as I cleaned out his pockets when doing the wash.

"Here, I've listed what I know about. I'm not sure about the final amount of my dad's final medical bills, but here's the current amount."

They both looked at the notepad, and back up at me.

"We'll be more than happy to pay this off, if you choose to be our surrogate. Even if it doesn't work out; due to something untoward happening during the pregnancy process, we promise to not let you down Bella." Carlisle said calmly.

"Ok, that's good. So if a baby results from this process, will I be able to keep in touch and visit occasionally? Just to make sure I wasn't having a strange dream, or imagined it all. It may be the only chance I ever get to be some sort of mother, you know? And it would be wonderful to see how they grow."

"Oh yes of course, although we would be the baby's legal parents, we would encourage your contact, and when the baby is a certain age asking us about where they came from, we could explain how they came to be born and what a wonderful thing you did for us, and how you are biologically related to them."

"Thank you both. I feel a great deal better about choosing this. So what would be the first part of the surrogacy process? It all seems a bit daunting."

"Are you sure you are happy with this whole thing Bella? Are there any more questions you want answered?" Carlisle asked.

"I feel pretty relaxed and good about it all, at the moment. You've assured me that you will care for any child, and you are not going to leave me in debt. On another whole different subject... Carlisle, do you have any idea as to what the outcome could be for my Dad? He wasn't looking too good, when I left him at the ICU."

"I'd like to see how he is in the morning, but I'm not really hopeful that he will regain consciousness, his vitals aren't great. Of course, we will hold off any other medical treatment like his operation, until he starts making some progress waking up and gaining strength."

"Doc, I think my Dad attempted suicide last night, he drank a whole bottle of that hooch Jacob Black distills, as well as swallowing all of his tablets. Just before he went to bed, he told me to forget him and go live my life. He's been very down and depressed for a while now, I think the idea of undergoing an operation was too much for him."

"Ah that makes sense, he wasn't responding at all when I came into his room this morning, I saw the empty whiskey bottle and pill containers, and put two and two together. I sorry Bella, I guess his depressive state is understandable, considering the prognosis I gave him yesterday."

"I know, it was inevitable that he was... feeling so bad about it all... I guess he wanted to take his fate into his own hands. Poor Dad."

I found a tissue in my pocket and blew my nose.

"That's enough sadness! Tell me all about what we need to do, to start this process. I need something to think about that's ...hopeful and positive. I think I would like to try to help you." I gave them a small smile.

Even though my dad was there in hospital, on death's door, I wanted to look forward to a positive future, other than grinding, hopeless poverty and never-ending exhaustion.

"Tomorrow I've got us an appointment with a lawyer here at ten a.m., to help us draw up our surrogacy agreement and all the terms we want to include in it. When it's exactly how we all want it, we can all sign it. Then we can start on getting your health checked out, and making sure you are started on some prenatal vitamin and mineral supplements, and are eating and sleeping well."

"Ok, that's great. I've never had a full medical check up before, so it will be good to see if I'm actually healthy." I snorted, I wasn't feeling like an energetic twenty two year old at the moment.

"After the general check-up, I'll get you an appointment with my personal gynecologist, to make sure you are able to understand your cycle and whole the process we will be going through." Esme said.

"Umm... ok. Hey Esme, want a hand cleaning up?" I jumped up and started grabbing the empty plates.

"Sure." she said rising with me.

"Carlisle how about us girls finish up here, and you go catch up on the national news in the den?"

Carlisle looked confused, but agreed with Esme.

I got Esme in the kitchen and turned to her.

"Esme can you maybe...um...come with me to the gynecologist's appointment, I'm nervous, and um...I've never had anyone look down there before."

I'm pretty sure Eric the five second, wonder-boy never got to see anything at all, especially in the gloom!

"Oh Bella I'd love to! I'd be more than happy to help you be as comfortable as possible. I'm really familiar with Dr Naidoo, she's absolutely great, very gentle and will explain everything thoroughly."

"Thanks Esme, I really appreciate it."

"So are you seeing any guys at the moment?"

"No, I've never had a boyfriend." I rolled my eyes and huffed.

"Oh...and are you on any birth control?"

"No, there's never been any need."

"So you don't have any period problems, nothing painful or super heavy?"

"No, I'm remarkably boring, nothing difficult or painful. Not like some of my friends at college. Poor things!"

"Yeah I know, that's what my life was like until recently. I would have given anything to have a reproductive system that was normal and worked properly" Esme looked sad, her cheerful exterior finally cracking.

"I'm sorry to hear about all of your troubles Esme. I'm feeling a lot more at peace with the whole surrogacy situation; I really hope I can help you. But what if it doesn't work?"

"Well I promise to still pay your debts off, so that you won't have to worry anymore about money ok? As long as we at least try, that's all I ask Bella, to attempt the process."

"How long do you think the process will take, once I'm found to be fertile and capable of actually carrying a baby?"

"I don't know, I suppose we can get Dr Naidoo to advise us how long it will take. I have a thought though, that Mother Nature always does things in her own good time, and there'll be no rushing her."

"I hope it happens quickly though, so that you both can have a baby soon. I'd like that for you, you deserve a baby Esme."

"Bella can I ask you one thing?"

"Yeah, sure."

"If you carry a baby for us, will you definitely be able to give it up, and hand it over to me?... Because I think that would be the hardest thing in the world...ever."

"I was thinking about the act of relinquishing a baby all day long, and you know what? As long as you promise to love, adore and cherish that little baby, with your whole heart, I'll be ok with it. And of course, you'll need keep me in the loop forever afterwards."

"Thanks sweetie, I think I'm starting to finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. You're an angel Bella" Esme sobbed, hugging me tight.

We stood crying in her beautiful kitchen, holding each other for a long while. The day had been one hell of a roller-coaster, and things were only going to get crazier, before they finally settled down.

Please leave your comments. Surrogacy is a fraught and difficult situation for all involved. This is an unusual scenario, as many surrogate relationships occur in countries such as India, and through agencies. I just wanted to play with the Cullens and Bella, and how that would work in their particular situation.