AN: SM is the owner of Twilight, lucky gal!
I own Rufus, and the feisty new Bella's personality.
Chapter five.
After sharing a late lunch with Esme and Carlisle, I drove to the supermarket to refill the fridge and get some nice, new girly stuff.
For the first time in months I felt completely relaxed. Shopping was a bit surreal...I was light, free and strangely joyous. Shopping wasn't usually my thing, but this afternoon, I was actually enjoying it!
I knew a large amount of money had been transferred into my account by Esme, straight after we had signed the contract. I was going to have money with which to cover my everyday expenses, she had insisted on giving me a very generous, monthly, living allowance.
Initially, my first reaction was to say that Esme's allowance was too much, but when Esme looked me in the eye sternly, and I relented.
It was good to finally agree, that living poor and always worrying about spending every cent, was really exhausting. Now I didn't have to worry about spending moderate amounts of money for the simple things in life, into the foreseeable future. I was still going to look for something I could do while at home, and earn money.
I wasn't going to go spending wildly, but I felt excited to at least have some things I'd done without, for quite a while now.
The Cullen's lawyer had started the process, to draw up bank cheques to pay off the mortgage, my student loans and all of Charlie's medical bills.
A massive weight had been lifted from my shoulders, and I felt free to be me.
Free to eat what I wanted, rather than trying to fuss over Dad's restricted palate and poor appetite.
Free to spend a little on some nice things! I'd mostly been doing without. Cheap generic products were ok, but now...now I could purchase some really good stuff.
I wanted to let loose in the kitchen and taste some new things too. I missed the diverse tastes to be found at the Californian cafes and food stalls during my university years.
I wanted to eat something delicious and more expensive than I could have afforded and paid for, just only yesterday.
I went to the deli section and put some goat's milk fetta, large marinated olives and sun dried tomatoes in the shopping trolley.
Then I picked up some fresh baby spinach, large red peppers, avocados, eggplants, and some luxurious, middle-eastern staples like – flat Turkish bread rolls, almonds, walnuts, pine nuts, figs, dates, hummus, tahini, couscous, garlic, cardamom, coriander, cumin and turmeric some extra expensive, organically grown, cold pressed, extra virgin, olive oil.
Yum!
I looked down at my shopping trolley with a smile on my face, and went back into the produce section, to pick up some mandarins, apples and pears.
I went to the meat section and picked up some organic, free range chicken thighs, lamb and large, free range eggs.
In milk aisle I found a brand which was organic and whole fat. I laughed to myself, whole fat milk always tasted better, and I needed to put on a little weight...what the heck! I placed it into the trolley.
I have three lifetime's worth of fish eat, sitting frozen in Dad's large, box freezer in the garage. I would never need to buy any fish. I should seriously get stuck into finding new salmon recipes.
I found the prenatal vitamin supplements which I was expected to use daily, and grabbed the largest bottle. Wow, they were expensive, but important, and wait for it...I could afford them...and most importantly they would assist in achieving good health for the littlest Cullen, once he or she finally made an appearance.
After that thrilling choice, I really let my hair down and threw in some expensive shampoo and conditioner, one of those fancy, pink razors, an expensive moisturizer, yummy body lotion and body wash, gloriously soft, quilted, three ply toilet paper, quality lip balm and a great smelling deodorant into the trolley.
I laughed and felt something leak out...oh...gravity having its way with the sperm! I would need to use lots of panty-liners if I wasn't going to be constantly worried about my clothes. I grabbed a few packs of the nicest, most absorbent ones I could find. Shaking my head. This could go on for months, I needed to be prepared!
I stopped in front of the toothbrushes and suddenly... felt quite undecided... so many different ways to clean one's teeth... so many colours, and shapes to choose from. I smiled and grabbed an electric toothbrush, some whitening toothpaste, some fancy, flossing ribbon and some nicely flavored mouth wash.
I spotted some nice pyjamas and socks, so I bought those too. I saw some undies, and added those to my pile. I would be more than happy to give my yucky, old knickers the flick!
To say I was smiling when I went to pay at the check-out would have been a real understatement. I was in fact, grinning like a crazy loon, and chuckling under my breath.
Buying expensive supermarket items, was giving me a bizarre kind of high...it was almost like winning the lottery...
"Bella?"
I turned saw Mike Newton behind me.
"Hi Mike."
"You look really happy...even though you just buried your Dad yesterday. Is ...uhh... everything ok with you?"
He eyed me suspiciously, like it was a crime for me to smile. Although from his perspective I probably was acting really odd.
Shopping for groceries doesn't usually make people ecstatic and want to dance around in public signing show tunes, like on 'Glee'!
"Oh Mike, it's just all the emotions I'm experiencing at the moment, don't worry, I'm fine."
"Mmm, right...sure! Did you get a chance to reconsider your opinion about going out with me some time?"
Shit! He really didn't get it yesterday, when I told him off, did he?
"Mike I still won't be dating, you or anyone else. So please just drop it, ok?"
The look on his face wasn't devastated, but it was kind of ...hopeful... like he would get me to change my mind eventually, if he only just tried a little harder, and didn't give up being really persistent.
Good grief! Was he ever going to get the message?
I paid up and without looking back at him, wheeled my shopping trolley into the car park and started loading the groceries into my truck.
My good humour had evaporated, along with Fork's sunshine. Thick, heavy rain clouds were coming in fast.
"Damn you Newton." I mumbled under my breath.
"Oh Bella, you've finally lost the plot and have started talking to yourself now, hmm?"
I spun around.
"Well, Jessica you're still as nasty as ever, I see." I huffed, while continuing to load my shopping.
"Ha! Why the hell did you need to come back here for? Forks was doing just great without you."
"Huh, really? You must be delusional. Did someone put you in charge since the last time I looked? No, they didn't...you know what Jess? I would have thought that you would have grown up and started acting your age by now, but obviously... you're sadly, developmentally delayed and stuck in a time warp, still acting like the head bully-bitch, like in high school. May I remind you that you are now twenty two years old and a fully grown adult, who should know how to act?"
She looked a little shocked.
"Jess, why don't you cut the crap and get out of my way. I've got much better things to do, than stand here and be verbally harangued by a toxic, small town parasite like you."
Jess started opening and shutting her mouth, like a stunned mullet. It was priceless!
I jumped in Bertha, and started her up. Her engine was still as loud as ever. She was a big, red, loud beast.
Jessica was still standing there in shock.
Apparently no-one had ever given her any biting come-backs, or called her on her shitty attitude.
I laughed aloud, reversing out of my spot and watching, as she started getting all wet. The heavens had opened, and the rain pelted down in buckets.
Jess looked exactly like a freshly caught mullet now!
I laughed and laughed!
What was with me today?
Ok, let me think...
First, Dad dies in pretty bad circumstances.
Second, I'm now officially a surrogate for the Cullens. I'm ovulating and currently Carlisle's spermatozoa is leaking out of my girly bits.
Thirdly, Mike and Jake have tried to pick me up and won't take no for an answer.
and Fourth, Jess and Lauren are still the town's, most horrible, scraggy-assed bitches.
Yep, that's about it...
Except I've suddenly had some sort of emotional transformation, and am now, for the first time ever in my life...scarily assertive and quick with wonderful, witty, cutting come-backs!
Some veil had apparently lifted, to reveal the snarky, steely, take-no-prisoners Bella Swan.
Maybe I'd finally cracked, and Dad's death had tipped me over into a hard-assed, fearless...more intense, freer version of me?
I drove slowly through the rain and pulled up in front of the house.
Luckily, the rain has eased back to a drizzle. I gabbed all of the bags. I only wanted to do a single dash, to the porch, even though my arms would be probably be pulling out of their sockets with all the weight.
I made it without slipping in the slushy mud, all the shopping and my arms happily still intact.
Looking down, I spied a couple of things sitting on the doormat.
One was an elaborate bunch of tropical flowers and a card. The other was a tiny ball of bedraggled fur.
I set down the shopping bags and knelt down to examine the soaked fur ball.
It made a tiny little noise. I was curious...I touched it... it was... a very, very wet kitten. Poor thing was in danger of getting hypothermia.
I picked it up, it opened its eyes and looked at me and made another tiny noise. I melted...poor baby! I stuck the little thing down the front of my tee-shirt and unlocked the door.
I kept the kitten there beside my skin to warm up, as I bought all the shopping and flowers inside. I pulled off my wet shoes and socks. I took off my wet, winter jacket and hauled all the groceries into the kitchen. The flowers could wait; I would look at them later.
The poor little kitten came first! Occasionally I would feel the fur ball move, as it slowly unfroze itself. I chuckled.
I put the food away and put on the kettle for a hot drink for myself, I was cold too.
Now, what the hell could I give this kitten to drink? It was probably still too young for solid food, I wonder where its mother was and if there are any more kittens somewhere nearby? I wonder how it got to be all alone?
I knew my fancy full-fat organic cow's milk wasn't going to be good for the kitten's digestive system...I needed the advice of a veterinarian.
Oh! That's right! I had a vet right next door! I put her number in my phone, right after I moved back here to look after dad. She said I could ring her in an emergency...
I rang explaining my predicament and she was more than happy to help me. She had a heap of kitten stuff stored at home. I heard her knock at the front door and I welcomed her in.
"Hi Angela, it's good to see you again."
"Ok, where is this little kitten?" She smiled. "I've found this stuff in boxes stored in my garage. It'll help with caring for a new kitten."
"Wow, thanks Angela... he or she is still down my tee-shirt, let's go into the kitchen and we can have a look at my little, wet waif, over a nice cuppa."
"Sure that's great!"
She looked down at the flowers still sitting by the door. I picked them up, looking at large arrangement quizzically.
Who would send fancy, tropical, garishly bright flowers to me, just the day after Dad's funeral?
"These were on the doorstep as I arrived and I haven't had any time to bring them any further than the front door...what with all the groceries and a wet, half frozen kitten to look after." I shook my head.
"Come on, its cold and we can warm up in the kitchen down here." I led the way.
The poor little guy wasn't too happy about being pulled out of my shirt, into the cooler temperature of the kitchen, with two giants looking at him.
He hissed and tried backing up away from Angela, but luckily she knew all about handling furious fur balls.
He was a he, that much was obvious, and his coat was quite long, and he looked twice the size, now that he was all dry.
Angela, giggled, and scuffed him by the neck.
"Alright let's see...he's around six weeks old, so that's good for you, he can be fed solid food as well as this kitten milk I bought over, from a dish rather than a bottle. So it will be less work for you."
"He's in pretty good shape, and just hungry. He's also got fleas, and probably worms too, so let's fix that right now."
She pulled out a small tube and placed a dot of liquid on his skin at the back of his neck. Then she got a small, plastic syringe and squeezed some paste into his mouth. She gently held his mouth shut while he was forced to swallow the worming paste.
"I know, you don't like the taste of the worming mixture, do you little fella?" She smiled at him.
She let him go and he shook his head and blinked at us wide eyed and unsure of all of the fuss.
"What are you going to call him?"
"Hmm, looks kind of like...a Rufus...yeah I think the name suits him. What do you think Rufus? Do you like your name?"
He looked at me and backed off as I went to touch him.
"Where do you think he came from?"
"He might have been from a litter which was borne to a stray female cat I found. She had been run over by a car or truck sometime yesterday. She was dead by the side of the road and was obviously still nursing. She looked like a stray, without a collar. So, you are now the proud new owner of little Rufus." Angela smiled.
"Ok, we can get used to each other, can't we little fella?" I muttered.
I picked him up by the scruff of his neck. He looked at me like I was the enemy. I laughed and patted him; he wasn't sure about me at all.
I rubbed his head and ears and put him back inside my tee-shirt.
"I'll need to wash myself and my clothes to make sure I'm not carrying fleas. That flea treatment will resist any new fleas and break their breeding cycle right?"
"Yeah you need to apply it every month to keep on top of them, but it's much better than the old washing and powder treatments they used to have for cats."
"Lastly, here's a small litter tray and some kitty litter to start you off. Where are you going to feed him?"
"How about in the laundry?"
"Put this tray near his food bowl, and put him in it, straight after each meal, he'll soon get the idea of how to use it, most cats are pretty easy to toilet train."
"Thanks so much Angela! How much do I owe you?"
"Don't worry about it; I've got all of that stuff from the sales reps, which constantly drop by my clinic. My old cat can only use so many new samples and I'm more than glad to help you, especially since you only just had your dad die. It must have been hard coming back here to care for him. Charlie was a good neighbour, but a little on the unsociable side sometimes."
"Ha! No kidding! He was my Dad and I did love him, but sometimes it was like trying to get blood out of a stone, trying to get him to open up and just talk. He would never, ever tell me how he was feeling, and although I knew he was depressed, it was a bit of a shock that he attempted to end his own life, with a bottle of whiskey and swallowing all of his medications, on his last night here."
"Oh god, that's awful Bella!"
"Yeah, it was even crazier, because I didn't hear him all night, and stupidly thought that he was sleeping peacefully. When he was really trying to end his life. I feel a bit guilty for not stopping him. I had no idea he even had a bottle of Jake Black's home distilled hooch in his room, it must have been hidden, along with his stash of contraband I found yesterday."
"Oh Bella, it wasn't your fault, you did everything you could. He knew what he was doing. I'm sure Charlie made his choice, it wasn't your responsibility."
I started crying. Angela came up and hugged me. Rufus meowed loudly and we both ended up chuckling, he didn't much like being squashed.
"Sorry little fella!"
While I lay down some newspaper, and set up Rufus' litter tray, food bowl and a milk dish, Angela sat and relaxed in the kitchen.
With a little canned kitten food and some kitten milk in his dishes, I placed the little guy in front of them and stood back.
He meowed and didn't know what to do. I guess that he'd never eaten from a bowl before, if his mother was a stray.
I picked him up and placed him closer to the food. Still he had no idea.
I put my finger in the milk and then touched his nose. He licked it and started purring excitedly.
"He really loves the milk Angela." I called out to her.
I got him close to the dish and bought his nose to touch the milk. Initially he resisted me, but then he licked again, and then got the hang of drinking out of a bowl.
Bingo!
"He's got it!" Angela noted with a smile, watching Rufus from the doorway.
He couldn't get enough of the milk and drank it all up, licking the bowl clean.
I thought he might like the food too, so I did the same thing and he got the hang of it fairly quickly.
I laughed and he looked very satisfied and full. His tummy was so full, that it bulged!
"Very good Rufus! Now for your next lesson, toilet time!" Angela and I chuckled.
I placed the well fed Rufus onto his litter try and stood back. He meowed and tried to follow me.
"Ok little fella, now when you need to do your business, this is how you do it."
I sat him back on the litter and got his front paw and did a scratching action with it, I showed him again with the other front paw.
"See?" I told him.
I stood back near Angela and let him try it out for himself.
"Hey Ange, want to stay for some dinner? I'm getting hungry, and I picked up some great food at the supermarket."
"That would be great! I only seem to eat toast and packet soup if left to my own devices on the weekends. I can't cook to save myself! So anything I eat which I haven't tried to make myself, will be more than fine with me Bella." Ange laughed and shook her head.
We heard a tentative scratching, and I turned to see Rufus getting right into making a nice mess scattering the litter around, he squatted down, looking very thoughtful.
"I think we have success!" Angela whispered.
"That's excellent, good job Rufus!"
I set out some spices and the chicken, and chopped up some onion, garlic and put together a Moroccan flavored dish, and placed it in the oven. One day I dreamed of buying a nice Targine, in which to cook long, slow dishes in true Moroccan style.
While I was busy with cooking, Angela held Rufus in her lap, he settled down to sleep.
We chatted away, like we'd known each other for years. I felt so comfortable and relaxed around her.
There was a lot we had in common; we both had a great interest in all of the life sciences and the environment. We both enjoyed going on long forest hikes and bird spotting.
I told Angela about some of the work I had done monitoring and researching, the various seabirds on the Californian coast.
She was excited and told me about some of the local bird colonies here and on the coastline around La Push, particularly the skuas, petrels, albatross' and shearwaters, not to mention the various gorgeous raptors.
She and I both found that we had a great passion for all of the eagles, falcons, hawks, kites and others types of raptors that were to be found all here in the Pacific north-west.
I started scratching my midsection, and pulled up my tee-shirt, to find out that I'd been bitten by ...fleas! Oh God, I completely forgot that I had put my little furry fleabag down my shirt! I was probably full of the biting nasties. I had to act fast, before they spread any further.
"Ange, please stay here for a little while. I've got to jump right into the shower, and wash myself and these clothes, quick smart! Damn fleas!"
"Sure, sure, I'll just dash go home and bring back a nice bottle of wine to go with our meal, your chicken dish smells delicious already, I can't wait to try it."
"Oh that would be great! I'm not much of a drinker, but a small glass won't hurt me especially if I eat something with it."
"I can bring you something else to drink, if you want?"
"No, I think I would rather like a little wine tonight, please don't go to any trouble though. I'm easy to please."
"Ok, here's your baby, I'll see you in a while." she handed me Rufus; he was still curled up fast asleep.
He's as cute as a button! I love the little critter already. So soft and ginger with little white socks and white stripe down his nose.
I put him down on an old, woolly sweater of Charlie's and he kept right on sleeping.
Ange went out the back door, to go to her place next door. I quickly took most of my clothes off and threw them in the washing machine and made my way up to the bathroom.
I gave myself a good scrub with my lovely new body wash, shampoo and conditioner and shook my head, when I thought about this morning.
Laying there in the Cullen's spare bed, holding in Carlisle's sperm, while they swam around and got well acquainted with my cervix and my ripe egg sitting up in the lining of my uterus.
Crazy!
I was going to repeat the whole thing, in two day's time. Esme was hopeful we would have a good result. I wasn't sure how long it would take.
Maybe it would work, maybe not.
As I came out of the shower, there was a loud knocking at the door.
Crap! I wonder who that could be? My hair was still dripping, and I was wrapped in a towel. Damn!
The knocking continued, getting more loud and intense.
I threw on my long robe and ran down the stairs, still wet.
"Ok, ok, I'm coming! Hold your horses! I'm coming!" I yelled to the loud person making a noise at my front door.
I threw the door open and came face to face with Mike Newton. Drunk as drunk, standing there breathing beer fumes on me and holding a sad looking bunch of daisies.
"Mike?"
"Bella, please forgive me! I need to make everything right with you. I can't go on... without knowing that you'll never forgive me..."
"Mike what are you talking about?"
"What I did in high school, it was terrible, and today I finally realised the gravity of it! Bella, I treated you so badly, just letting Jess and Lauren get away with all of their crappy behaviour. I should have stood up and defended you, but I didn't have the guts. Please, please forgive me, I was stupid and thoughtless and afraid of them."
"Ok, if I forgive you will you go home and sober up?"
"I guess ...wait ... does that mean we're friends now?"
"I don't know Mike... acquaintances maybe."
"Oh... right, well do you want to go out with me now?"
"No Mike, I don't. Don't ask me again, it's getting really monotonous having to say no all the time."
"Well change it to a yes! I really like you Bella, we could be good together."
"No means no Mike! I'm going back inside now, goodbye Mike, now please just go home!"
I closed the door on him, his beery breath and sad, wilting daisies. I leant against the door, shaking my head at the sheer, unrelenting persistence of his actions. He mumbled a few things, before I heard his footsteps stumbling down the path and back on to the road.
I peaked at him through the front window; he was walking back to his parent's house. I was relieved he didn't get behind the wheel to drive anywhere.
"Good grief, he's just too much!" I muttered and pulled my robe tighter around me.
"Bella? Where are you?"
"In here Angela, I'm just making sure Mike Newton has left."
"Why?"
"He was just here at the door, making a big, noisy, drunken, pest of himself. I managed to send him on his way home to his mama, thank heavens!"
"Ha! He's that blond one who acts just like a golden retriever right?"
"Yeah, have you met him?"
"Oh yeah, when I first moved here he wouldn't leave me alone."
I chuckled, "he's kind of like a sticky, Cling-on ...it's like it doesn't matter how many times I say no, he just doesn't listen. What's with all the guys here in Forks? Jake did the same thing at the funeral."
"Oh it's because of the mating imperative and achieving greater genetic diversity. When most males see a new female, they suddenly get an irrational impulse to spread their seed." Angela rolled her eyes and smiled.
I chuckled, "well I guess you're right there, but the thing is my eggs aren't available for their ...err ... seed. I'm rather fussy, about who I let into my bed. Mike and Jake really don't cut the mustard, I'm afraid." I learnt my lesson with Eric the five-second boy-wonder. The only male in bed with me would be Rufus.
"Come on, dinner smells like its ready, I'm going to put on some clothes and dry my hair. I'll be down in a jiffy."
"I'll pour us some wine."
We ate and drank and talked and laughed. The rain bucketed down outside. When it came to going home, I lent Angela my big umbrella and she hugged me goodbye.
What a day!
I got a new, furry, baby boy called Rufus, a great, new friend called Angela, I was a deliciously warm and full of Moroccan chicken and hopefully Mike Newton would leave me be, in peace.
I gathered Rufus up after saying goodbye to Angela, and looked over to the tropical flowers. I pulled out the note.
'Bella, we've been thinking of you.
Enjoying my time in the Bahamas with Phil!
Come and visit us when you finally leave Forks.
There is plenty of sunshine and fun in Florida!
Cheers Renee.'
I couldn't believe it! She knew Charlie was gravely ill, and then in ICU in a comatose state. I had rung her, and left a message a few days ago when he died.
She never even bothered to mention Charlie and his death.
I never got a phone call; looks like these flowers were her strange way of coping with the situation.
She was scared of getting old and dying after all.
Why even bother to send these ridiculous flowers at all?
I huffed.
I don't think I'll ever understand my mother, not that she was ever really much of a nurturing kind of person.
Ha! More like an egg donor with a bad attitude!
"Let's go to bed Rufus, it's been one hell of a day!"
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