AN: SM owns Twilight, lucky duck!
Chapter nine.
The next two days I spent clearing, cleaning and then packing, ready to leave Forks.
I had to admit, the living room looked great, but a little stark without all of Charlie's clutter. I'd cleaned the carpet with vacuuming and then steam using my lovely new gadgets; and underneath all of the ground-in dirt, the carpet was surprisingly nice! All of the grotty stains had been lifted by the steam cleaner and I felt a sense of achievement.
I would pick out and buy some new pleated blinds for the windows when I got back after my trip, as well as some new some new rugs. I'd been checking out colour charts for new paint, and new energy efficient light fittings, online. They would be my next choices to make.
The other great news, was the bank that had sent me the full title for the house and land, I was now officially the new owner!
It shocked me to know that little old me, was a real life home owner! How ever so humble, there's no place like home...my home!
No one could ever be able to take it away from me!
It was all mine and I would be forever grateful to my friends the Cullens, for helping me to make it happen.
As predicted, my fertile cycle had eased and I was starting to feel more edgy, just like the way I feel when I'm premenstrual... I must be heading towards a period...I guess. Well, that's what it feels like anyway.
I've read the manual for my saliva sensor front to back, and apparently, there's no pregnancy indicator on this fancy do-hickey. I guess the only way I'll find out if I'm pregnant is the old fashioned way, by missing my period and peeing on a stick.
Rufus is having fun with the vacuum cleaner, trying to pounce on it as I moved it around getting up the last of the dust, and admiring the clean carpet. It felt great under foot too.
After I switched the vac off, Rufus quickly races up my body, and perches on my shoulders, looking very pleased with himself and purring in my ear.
Mad cat!
Last night Rufus tried running up Angela's body, and freaked her out completely...she just didn't see him coming, as he ran up her back, instead of her front.
When he found her shoulder and started purring, she finally calmed down and laughed. She shook her head, wondering what crazy tricks the naughty boy would get up to next.
Rufus spent the next hour licking Angela's neck and ears, in an effort to apologize for making her squeal and freaking her out.
We all loved the baked salmon and veggies, particularly Rufus.
If a cat could smile, he would have looked like the Cheshire cat, I'm sure! He just about ate his whole body weight in baked fish, and still begged for more! Greedy boy!
I planned on pulling out a couple of big, frozen salmon and packing them with ice in the large ice chest, and taking it with me down to Leah and the Prof. as presents and to help make a small dent in the huge amount, stocked in the box freezer.
My dreams had picked up, increasing in intensity and colour. Every dream was deeply moving and filled with some sort of unfulfilled longing.
The oddest was the re-occurrence every morning, of my rise in body temperature and the strong wringing and clenching of all my pelvic muscles, waking me up in a confused, sweaty, orgasmic mess.
I dreamed of Angela, then Leah, and this morning was a most confusing dream... of both Esme and Carlisle hand-feeding me sweets and wrapping me tightly in their grasp, to the point where I felt smothered, but orgasmed nevertheless. Weird!
Every dream had some sort food theme and was in shocking brilliant colour.
Was I tripping on something? No I'm pretty sure I wasn't, unless there was something in the town's water supply. No, it wasn't that, everyone else would be acting odd too if that was the case, and so far, Forks was still as boring, unchanging and as overcast as ever.
Was I still going through some sort of unconscious, stress reaction? Could be a distinct possibility?
Was I finally having a delayed sexual awakening? Up until now, I'd been almost asexual in the way I related to the world around me. I'd been somehow immune to reactions of this sort. No one had ever attracted me, or made me feel hot, let alone made me dream about them in this way.
When I gave into peer pressure and had my one and only sexual experience with Eric, I wasn't so much unimpressed with the whole event; as I was more upset with myself, that I thought that if I followed the crowd, I would somehow fit in.
It confirmed to me that I was not only different, but that I wasn't normal, and sex just wasn't for me.
Maybe I was wrong, and it was the whole situation, and Eric who wasn't really right for me? Rather than me not being right with the world,
Maybe out there somewhere, I'd be able to find someone who I actually like enough, to try and have a real life relationship and maybe, maybe, that might even include sex...possibly even enjoyable, fulfilling sex the kind of sex that makes both partners happy.
Who knows what I was going to experience, if this crazy-waking-up-orgasm-thing kept on happening?
Could I cope waking up feeling like that everyday? Yeah, I suppose I could cope...it was kind of wild, and made my heart feel like jumping out of my rib cage...and the intensity of starting out my day feeling like that was a real buzz, I have to admit!
Is this what teenage boys feel like waking up having wet dreams? Maybe.
What if it all got wildly out of hand and all I ever did was crave and long for this intense connection and sexual contact...all day and night?
I'm pretty sure that that hopefully wouldn't happen, but you do hear of women who are insatiable nymphomaniacs. I hoped and prayed that this was just a phase, and I wasn't going to become one of those women, it would be too much!
Let's hope it doesn't ever develop to that level, and what ever is causing this change in my body, calms down a little!
Waking up in the morning in a sweaty mess after a wild dream, isn't the end of the world, it's just a change I suppose. Worse things could happen, like being hit on the head with a meteor.
Journaling all of the dream sequences while they are still fresh in my mind, will be a great way to figure what the hell is happening, and if nothing else, it will make good fun reading, if and when it finally ceases.
Oh, here's another great idea! I can log my cycle in the journal too, and follow to see if the dreams have anything to do my hormonal fluctuations!
Yes it's a perfect scenario for the basis of a small scientific project ...on me! It's a little out of my normal field of study, but nevertheless, it could work...couldn't it?
Tonight for dinner, I'm showing Ange how to make delicious, vegetable ratatouille, served with a herb flavored couscous. Its an easy dish to master, and nutritious enough to eat as a main course on its own.
She's keen to learn, and I want to show her that her skills in the kitchen can extend to things other than toast and instant soup. She'll never survive the winter on a diet like that. She's too thin as it is!
A timid knock on the door, reveals Esme. She looks worried and I welcome her into the house.
"I'm sorry to burst in on you like this Bella. I just needed to get out of the house and get some sanity, with a nice, normal person, who I'm not related to, either by marriage or blood."
"What's happened? Did you finally crack, and strangle Blondie with her own hair?"
I tried making light of her situation, but obviously things were serious for her to be driven out of her own home.
"Oh Esme! Tell me everything! Come in and sit in my newly, cleaned living room. It's a little stark at the moment, but I can happily assure you that there's not a single speck of dust anywhere! As you can see, I've been having a little bit of a cleaning frenzy, since Charlie's been gone. Let me put on the kettle, and you can share all of your worries with me."
"Wow! This room's got great potential Bella! Nice big windows, if there was a comfy window seat right under the window there, it would look adorable and be a lovely place to sit in the sun to relax and read."
"That's a really great idea! Do you know any local tradesmen who could make a window seat for me?"
"No, not really, but I'll let you in on a little secret... I designed and built all of my own cupboards and shelving at home, without anyone else's assistance."
"Oh my God, Esme! Really? You have to teach me how to do stuff like that! I'd love more than anything, how to make stuff with my own two hands... and know that it won't fall down or break, when I use it."
"Sure, I'd love to! At the moment I'd do anything to get away from all of the drama and tension, surrounding our niece and nephew's visit to Forks."
"Well, how about I give you a spare key and you can come and hide out here, while I'm away in California? It's not as palatial as your place, but it is quiet and my neighbour Angela would be good company if you want someone to chat to."
"Thanks Bella, it means the world to me, why couldn't I have nice, normal, friendly relatives like you?"
"Yeah, I know the feeling! I wish my mom was as thoughtful and caring as you. She's still begging me to come down to Florida and hang out with her, so she doesn't get lonely while Phil tours with his baseball team. The only reason why she wants me there, is because they've banned her from tagging along. Last time she managed to make a big fool of herself, drinking too much and then propositioning all of the team members... in front of the team manager, all of their wives and her own husband Phil."
"Ha! Gee, she sounds like she could give Rosalie a run for her money!
That girl has me so wound up, I can't think straight! She's trying to push ahead in her modelling career, but her personality is so toxic that it's holding her back. She's hoping to become the next big supermodel, but she's way too demanding and has apparently thrown too many tantrums, to be offered any serious work, by the high-end designers and their agents."
"Oh right, I thought it was only the designers who were allowed to throw all the fits, and the models just wore the clothes. Kind of like... silent life-size, walking coat hangers, or something."
"Ha ha, silent isn't a word anyone could ever call Rosalie! She was born complaining! Well what with her selfish personality and the extreme dieting to keep her stick-like appearance... is now costing her friendships, work and soon her family too. She's so irritated and mean the whole time... because she wants to eat, but can't. On top of that Emmett wants to settle down with her and start a family."
"Huh, she doesn't seem like a kid-friendly kind of person Esme, maybe Emmett needs to get someone less dramatic, and more err, soft and maternal."
"That's the thing; neither can bear to be parted from the other. They love each other a lot, even though they fight all the time. She's torn between her career and motherhood."
"Can't she have both? There are lots of great models who have been both mothers and models. Look at Jerry Hall, Miranda Kerr and Claudia Schiffer, they have all modelled successfully and had kids at the same time."
"Yes, I've told her this, but she remains stubbornly immune to reason. Oh my! Who's this little cutie?"
Rufus came strutting into the living room dragging his toy mouse proudly along.
"That's Rufus my kitten, I found him on the doorstep a week ago, wet, bedraggled and nearly dead. Angela helped me revive him."
Rufus sat his mouse down by Esme's feet and she picked it up and dangled it in the air, and he chased it, leaping and pouncing on it. He rolled around attempting to kill it completely dead, before licking it into submission.
We both chuckled.
"He's gorgeous!"
"Yeah, Rufus cheers me up, just by being himself and not worrying about whats going on in the world."
"Come into the kitchen and I'll make you that cuppa I promised you."
"Oh wow, these egg-yolk yellow cupboards could be fixed up easily Bella. In fact, have you ever thought about knocking down this wall here, and then opening up this whole living space? Then maybe putting in a bunch more windows all along the sunny side of the house, and running new kitchen benches and shelving all along this wall here?"
Esme had come to life, demonstrating and explaining exactly what I'd worried and thought about doing, to make the most out of this place while I lived in it, and adding to its charm and comforts.
"Here Esme, can you draw out those ideas for me, like a sketch?"
I handed her some pens and several sheets of paper, and she got to work, making sense of my squashy living / kitchen / dining areas. Showing me how it could easily be done, so that the space was not only inviting, but vastly expanded and much more efficient.
I was amazed at what a difference her ideas could make.
"So this is all possible?"
"Mmm sure. These days, getting a pre-made set of adjustable, kitchen cupboards, sinks and shelves is so easy, it all comes delivered to your house in flat packs. New plumbing and electrical work could be put on this wall here, and you could even fit in a small pantry, and put the washer and dryer into a small, neat cupboard, to use all of the extra floor space for a bigger dining area, see?"
I nodded. Her ideas were great!
"Or if you wanted, you could add on an informal mud room / sun-room, incorporating the laundry, out on this side of the house. Expanding out here, making it a lot more easy to live in and appeal to a greater market, if you ever wanted to sell it or rent it in the future."
"Huh! That could be amazing, but what about the cost? I've still got to get to pull some savings together, for the future."
"Yes, I understand. Would you let me cost out some affordable alternatives for you and draw up some plans, maybe put together some budgets so you can see what these ideas would cost to actually build?"
"Really? Would you do that for me Esme? That would be wonderful! Are you sure it's not too much trouble?"
"Oh hell no! It will be my great pleasure! This kind of thing I love to do and I'm really good at. It keeps me from going prematurely grey,and from stressing too much, being murderously annoyed by my thoughtlessly rude relatives."
That's how I came to have two good friends, sitting at my tiny kitchen table, eating with me. Esme took the spare key with her, and a bunch of re-modelling sketches, promising to let herself in, to do all the necessary measured drawings and some research on the costing and options.
Angela was happy to get to know Esme better, and she surprised herself at the delicious food she made with me, promising to try practicing the ratatouille recipe again.
I made her take home the leftovers to heat up for her lunch.
Rufus and I made our way up to bed. I couldn't wait to get on the road tomorrow nice and early. I had set aside most of the things to take with us by the front door, including the Charlie's giant ice box, ready for the frozen fish, Rufus' food and milk, his carrier and the majority of my clothes packed in a small rucksack.
Leah was keen to see me and my new kitten, promising to introduce him to her hunting dog Marcy.
I prayed they would get on, and that Rufus wouldn't be too scared by meeting a dog for the first time in his short life.
Hi, hope you are enjoying reading this story, as much as I'm enjoying writing it.