Chapter 12: Memories and Regrets

29 Years Ago

As the sunrise began to chip away at the darkness of the waning night, Knives quietly crept to the room in which Anya was sleeping. He usually woke up before her and he enjoyed watching her as the light lit up her sleeping features. The plant-child was so peaceful in her slumber and the sight made Knives feel at ease. Even his rage against the humans seemed to dim in her presence.

A sudden twinge of sadness pricked his heart when he realized that soon Knives would have to make a decision about Anya. Before he had found her, Knives had been in an encounter with his brother Vash in the city of July. Knives had triggered Vash's angel arm and it had resulted in the total destruction of the city. The only downside that Knives had not foreseen was that Vash had turned on him and Knives had been badly injured. Externally Knives had healed fully but internally he could feel that all was not as it should be. He would need to enter a hibernation state in order to repair fully.

However, in order to do this, Knives would be forced to leave Anya alone. This fact had so far, left Knives with three options in regards to Anya's care. First, leave Anya in the care of his lieutenant Legato Bluesummers. The human would see it as an honor and would not fail him. Second, he could have Anya hibernate with him or at least stay nearby his cell in the facility. Lastly, he could leave Anya to her own devices out in the world as he slept. He quickly dismissed the third option. Though Anya was intelligent and resourceful, she was still a bit naïve and far too trusting. Also, Knives didn't want to risk her finding Vash. Anya was his and he didn't want Vash snatching her away from him.

The second option soon was also rejected. It wouldn't be fair to keep her cooped up; especially with how long she had been in stasis. She was a beautiful flower and she required sunshine and open air. She would wilt away if she was locked up while Knives was busy healing. Knives sighed as he realized that he had only one option left to him. He would summon Legato to care for Anya in his absence. His servant was a cold, uncaring individual but he would not fail Knives in this task. Legato would watch over Anya no matter how long Knives was in hibernation and she would be safe.

Knives reached Anya's door, glad that he had reached a decision but deep down his insides were twisted by sadness and worry. He didn't want to leave her. He would miss so much by being gone, but if he didn't leave now he would risk permanent damage to his being. The problem was so maddening.

"Knives?"

The quiet, tired voice pulled Knives from his thoughts. He slowly entered the bedroom and saw that Anya was already awake, rubbing her eyes and sitting up. The sunlight seemed to make her tousled hair shine in the dim room. He couldn't help but smile as he looked at her.

"Little one, why are you awake? It's still early," he said gently as he entered and sat beside her on the bed. Anya stared down at the blanket, her index finger on her right hand absently tracing designs on it. It was her habit when she was embarrassed.

"Anya?" Knives gently prodded.

"You were so sad, I couldn't sleep," she whispered. "I'm sorry, Knives. I didn't mean to pry."

Knives sighed and carefully pulled her closer to him so he could hold her. The young girl nestled close against him, taking reassurance from the contact.

"No need to be sorry. It wasn't your fault. Your powers are growing. I should have known better," he replied softly.

"Knives, why are you so sad? Is it because you're broken inside?" she asked.

Knives eyes widened in shock and he looked down at the incredible creature in his arms.

"How did you know that I was hurt?"

"I sensed it. Just like the plant I had healed last year," she replied innocently.

Once again, Knives was left speechless. This child had so much potential and she hadn't even reached adulthood yet. She would probably grow to be more powerful than Vash and Knives put together. The thought made Knives giddy. All that raw talent and she was his.

"Knives? I could heal you, just like I did the plant," she offered shyly.

Knives snapped back from his musings and looked down to see Anya's hopeful expression. Such a sweet girl, so selfless. She was worth more than millions of those wretched humans. Knives smiled and gave her a gentle squeeze.

"No, dear one. Save your strength. This is more complicated than the other plant. Thank you though," he replied.

"But Knives, I don't want you to go away!" she exclaimed. "I don't want to be alone again!"

"Shh. You won't be alone. I'll have someone stay with you. Then when I'm better, he'll bring you back to me," Knives explained, mollifying her somewhat.

"Still don't want you to go," she pouted, causing Knives to smirk.

"It'll be okay, Anya. Now enough sad talk. How about we go into town today? You could get a new dress."

The innocent girl perked up and bounced excitedly in Knives' arms.

"Ooo and ice cream, Knives! We can get ice cream too! Please!"

"Haha! Of course. Can't deny that sweet tooth of yours," he said lightly.

"Yay!" she exclaimed and sprang from Knives' arms, racing towards the small kitchen.

"Hurry Knives, we have to get ready! Hurry!"

-)*(-

Present Day

The horn of the transport woke Knives from his dream and startled him awake. The loud noise announced the steamer's arrival at their destination and Knives could see that the pitiful humans were already scurrying to collect their belongings or head toward the exits. Knives sneered as he grabbed his bag and began to push his way through the throng. He had been loath to travel with the scum but he knew that Anya would have noticed if he had used "other" methods. He was so close now; he couldn't risk her running again. Knives grimaced as he remembered his dream. It had been his temper and haste that had caused her to run the first time.

On that trip to town, Anya had thought that she could help settle a petty dispute between two of the vermin. She had used her empathic abilities to try and help the savages understand each other. All she had done was scare them, uniting them against her instead of their original problem. Knives gritted his teeth as he remembered the sound of the gunshot and her scream. He had never imagined that such a piercing, terrified sound could come from her small body. When he had reached her, the sight of their guns pointed at Anya and her blood-soaked shoulder had sent him into a rage. He remembered Anya pleading with him to leave them alone, that they didn't understand. Knives had ignored her pleas, telling himself that she was only a naïve child and that the vermin had to be punished, not thinking of the consequences.

And oh, how he had punished them! Knives could manipulate his body to become sharp, knife-like extensions. He had used them to reduce the offenders into a red ruin of flesh. When he was done with them, even a doctor wouldn't be able to identify the remains. That's what they deserved for hurting Anya. Or so he had thought.

Knives stepped off of the sandsteamer as memories of Anya's terrified face came forth, reopening old wounds. She had looked at him with such fear and revulsion it had shocked him. When he had tried to help her up off the ground, the poor girl had pulled away with a scream. Then a moment later, she had literally disappeared, using some sort of mental manipulation. Knives didn't know how she had done it, but she had completely shielded herself from him. After that horrible moment, he never saw Anya again. Now after all these years, Knives had a chance to rectify that mistake.

He would get her back and make her see that he was the better choice, better than Vash. Then they would be together and everything would be as it was. Maybe even better this time.

"Master?"

The single word brought Knives out of his recollections. He hadn't even noticed that he had almost walked right out of the village. Knives chuckled and rubbed his tired eyes.

See, Anya? See how focused I am to get back to you? he thought to himself.

Knives sighed, assuring himself that it wouldn't be much longer now. He would just need to be patient a bit longer. Bolstered by that thought, Knives turned to his subordinate who had been shadowing him, waiting patiently to be acknowledged. Legato Bluesummers, still dressed in his garish and intimidating garb, looked meek and small in Knives' presence. As Knives looked at the man, Legato quickly placed his right hand over his heart and bowed his head.

"Master, did you have a safe journey?" he asked politely.

"Ugh, safe yes, pleasant no. I need a shower so I can get the stink of human peasant off me," Knives answered, tossing his bag at Legato. The assassin caught it without looking then led his master to where they would be staying.

"Of course. The room is ready, Master," he said obediently.

"Excellent. How has observation been going?"

"Quite well. Although, when she has noticed my intrusions she has attempted to block me out. Many times she succeeds."

"That was to be expected. As long as she hasn't discerned your location."

"No, Master. She is unaware of our location and plans."

Knives grinned then took a final look back to the direction where the city of October waited. He took one hand and subtly blew a kiss to where Anya waited.

"Soon, my love. I'll see you soon."

He let out a laugh then turned back and followed Legato to the hotel. Now it was time to rest and to plan.

-)*(-)*(-

Hello! Sorry if this chapter is a bit short but I wanted to give a little more insight into Knives' side of things. Hope you liked it. Once again thank you, thank you for your comments! They help so much and I love reading them. Keep 'em coming! Love and peace!