Author's Note: I am sorry. I am so, so truly sorry that I am incapable of posting regular chapters over any length of time at all like a normal person. Please forgive me and read on. My writing style has changed, and I have changed the course of this story somewhat in my brain, but it's still the same character. I've done my best to make sure she is still in character with what I started out with, plus some much-needed fine tuning. I hope nobody is angry at me for leaving it for so long, but I just kind of put my life back together again. I'll try to update more frequently, if not more regularly, and to keep the storyline as coherent as possible. I'm truly sorry. Now to the story, because even if it's a nice gesture on my part, you came to read it and not my apologetic and kind of sad author's note.

I keep running around, completely lost, no idea where I'm going, until finally I see the familiar shock of black hair beside the equally familiar blond politician. I'm knocked down for the second time today, but I don't care; I just sit there in the dirt, hugging Jessob like I'm never going to let go. When I do let go, he has a grin stretching from ear to ear, and he hands me Bastian's coin purse. I toss it to its owner and try to keep up as Jessob signs rapidly about someone named Elicia and how pretty she is, "but not as pretty as you, Sister, because you are the prettiest girl in the world," and that he got to ride a horse with a loud man named Kieran who was excited to see someone named Oscar-

"Slow down, kid, I can't keep up- who's Elicia?"

He frowns and resigns the name: E-L-I-N-C-I-A.

"Okay, so you're talking about Queen Crimea. If you would sign slower I wouldn't miss letters and words. So you rode here on a horse with a royal knight named Kieran?"

He nods violently, still grinning like a madman with a torch.

"Alright, you can tell me all about this later. I'll take you to our tent and you can rest a bit, yeah? When you're rested I'll take you to meet some new friends," I promise. Jessob nods again, a little less violently, and tries to conceal a yawn. Poor thing, must be exhausted from travelling so far- and I've heard about a knight named Kieran who apparently has a penchant for being loud, obnoxious, and attacking Oscar of the Greil Mercenaries on sight. Of course, it could be a different Kieran.

Probably not.

"I can carry him if you like, Kat," says a cool voice beside me. "I can call you Kat, right?"

"You can call me whatever you like- I can hardly stop you, Ranulf," I reply, "but I don't mind having a nice nickname for a change. As for the boy, I can carry him myself."

I stand up with Jessob in my arms like a baby, already half asleep, and look at Ranulf as his ears twitch into an inquisitive position.

"For a change? What is it you are accustomed being called then?"

That, my furry ally, is a long story. And I have no intention of going into it at all, not even enough to actually tell you that it's a long story. So I smile at him and walk away.

I sit on the bed beside Jessob- though it's hardly a bed, more like a straw mat on a line of crates- and wait for him to fall deep enough into his dreams that I can leave without alarming him. For all his brave talk and taunting of people who could hurt him, he's still only a child, and he is terrified of being alone. For the longest time he slept in my bed, and would wake up and throw a fit if I left. The first time it happened, I thought he'd fallen out of bed- but the thumping continued and I rushed back, scared he might be having a seizure. Instead, he'd woken up and started banging on the walls to make me come back. I eventually got him into his own room where I would sleep on the floor. He's fine on his own now- he doesn't wake up, or if he does, I don't know about it. But I still have to sit with him until he falls asleep, or he just lays in bed awake. Some fears just don't go away, I guess.

I can hear talking outside of the tent, but the sensations are getting so mixed up that I can't tell who they are. The tent flap opens, but I don't turn- it's probably Volke or Bastian.

"Um… are you Katja?" a voice asks, blazing over my skin.

I whip around and put a finger to my lips, not making the "shush" sound, but needing him to be quiet. The redhead from earlier is standing in the doorway, and he throws his hands up in the air like a criminal giving themselves up to the guards. I wave my hands in a shoo gesture and mouth "wait outside," then turn back to make sure Jessob is still asleep. He is; I stand up slowly and walk out of the tent as silently as possible.

The redhead is standing outside, shuffling from foot to foot, digging his toes into the ground. His Laguz friend isn't with him, and he looks a bit nervous. I walk over and tap his shoulder- he jumps back, obviously startled. I laugh in spite of myself; the look on his face is silly, and he's blushing like mad.

"Hey, I'm sorry about that, I didn't realize-" he started, but I stopped him.

"It's fine," I wave my hand, "You couldn't have known. You're the guy I ran into earlier, right?"

He laughs and the blush goes away. "Yeah, I'm the guy you literally ran into earlier. So you were looking for your… kid?"

"My?... Oh, goddess no, he's not mine. He's an orphan- I took him in, care for him. He's more like a little brother to me than a son." I look pretty young to be a mom, don't I? Do I look that old? Why would he care if I had a kid anyway, does he think that I'm a prostitute? Unless…

No. Not possible. He can't- there's no way- he could never, no one could- but he doesn't know about the Brand- still though-

Enough!

"Oh. That's good, I guess. I mean, not that it's good that he's not yours, it's just good that you didn't… um…"

Oh jeez. Poor thing is struggling for words, can't stop making himself look like an idiot. To be honest, I kind of enjoy watching him stumble over his vocabulary like that, but it might be better to just let him off the hook… this time.

"I know what you mean. It's fine," I reply, offering a smile to help put him at ease.

"Alright. So who are you here for?"

I hesitate. I'm not really here for anybody, except maybe Volke and Bastian- but I'm supposed to be here as a neutral representative for the Branded. It's a difficult question. I also don't know who he's here for, and if he doesn't like my answer, he may decide that I'm an enemy. Not that it matters to me, but I'm kind of tired of looking over my shoulder all the time.

"I'm here as a… favor, to my mentor. He thinks I need to learn more about politics and the like." Neutral enough answer, and I can see a messenger coming towards us; if he asks who my mentor is, he'll be interrupted by the messenger.

"Your mentor? Who's your-"

"Sir, Miss, the meeting is about to start. You've been requested to appear with your respective groups or countries at the centre of the camp in ten minutes."

Aha! See, what'd I tell you?

"Looks like it's time to go. I'll see you at the meeting," I say as sweetly as possible, then I turn and walk away- hopefully I'm heading to the centre of the camp, otherwise it'll be embarrassing. Nobody stops me though, so I just keep walking.

As I look around, I can see that pretty much every important person on the continent is here. I can see Elincia, Naesala, Kurthnaga, Micaiah, Sanaki, Skrimir, Tibarn, Leanne, and a whole host of others. There's plenty of people who I don't know, but there are some that I do: Janaff, Ulki, Stephan who tried to recruit me to his cause or whatever once, Ranulf, Kieran, Bastian, and Volke. Everyone is standing with their countries- including Stephan, with his budding democracy in the desert- and there's one space in the circle that looks a little lonely… yeah, I'm going to sit with Bastian and Volke.

I stand next to Bastian, who elbows me toward the centre of the circle.

"Ow! What was that for?" I hiss.

"The empty spot is for you- you're representing the Branded," he whispers back.

"I'm what?!" I growl. This was not my plan- I did not at any point agree to this! I can't represent an entire group of people that I not only refuse to associate with, but that I loathe with every fiber of my being. Freaks don't deserve representation, and if they did, they would deserve better representation than a former slave with a thrill addiction, attachment problems, daddy issues, and that needs an attitude adjustment.

"I didn't agree to this! I'm not standing over there by myself," I panic. This particular emotion registers in Bastian's brain, because he turns to Volke and jerks his head in my direction.

"Go with her," he says, and adds, "I'll pay whatever you deem necessary afterward."

The assassin nods and walks beside me, almost close enough to touch, comforting me in my moment of sheer terror. The walk to the empty space in the circle isn't that long, but it feels like ages to me. When I arrive at my spot, the meeting begins.

"Welcome, everyone, to this meeting," Sanaki begins. "I know you're all still busy with rebuilding and negotiating, and that you took valuable time out of your schedules to come here, but…"

On and on it goes. She goes on for about three minutes, laying out the issues on the table for today, just more senseless talking. I'm so bored. This is so pointless. Maybe I can get away without knowing what's going on- after all, I don't have any "grievances" of one nation against mine, or any issues with trade or anything at all… except I would like my record in Daein cleared. But I doubt they'll even consider it. Probably laugh in my face instead.

The first one to step out after Sanaki's speech is Crimea, which has nothing to say except that relations with Gallia are much improved and that they hope to soon completely eradicate Laguz discrimination among the general population. They cycled through, the bird tribes, Goldoa, Daein, Stephan for his own as-yet unnamed country, then…

"Step forward," Volke says quietly, covering his mouth with his hand.

I shake my head. "I didn't agree to this, and I have no qualification or right to speak for an entire group." Everyone heard me- I want everyone to hear me. I turn to the rest of the group and speak even louder.

"I can't speak for a group of people that are still scattered around the continent like birds that have scattered after a child slings stones at them. Truthfully, you shouldn't have decided that the Branded needed their own spokesperson. Are we not citizens of your own respective countries? How can I speak for so many from so many different countries? Why can't you speak for them yourselves?"

I step back, finished.

"I.. see. Skrimir, please step forward and speak your piece," Sanaki moves on. I can feel my face turning red, because my outburst was a bit childish and I know that nobody took me seriously. I'm ashamed that I allowed myself to get so worked up about it. It's embarrassing and humiliating and just plain awful.

"First, I would like to acknowledge the efforts Elincia has made to become allies with my country, and to thank her for continuing the legacy of her father before her, as I will continue my uncle's."

"Thank you, Skrimir," Elincia replies. Skrimir nods, then continues.

"I would, however, ask that my allies send aid to Gallia to eradicate the Branded threat upon our peace."

What?! He did not just blame the Branded for his incompetency to rule! This is outrageous- he can't just blame us for his failures! What about equality laws- what about us?

"You're a liar and a damn fool if you think that the Branded are to blame for your troubles," I challenge. Everyone's eyes turn to me, and my face is turning red again but I don't care because it's not embarrassment, it's anger.

"Your people are starting riots in the capital-" Skrimir starts, but I'm not having any of that bullshit.

"And why would that be, hmm? You talk about the Laguz enslavement and hatred and discrimination, everyone does, and that's fine, but what about us? Where are our equality laws, our right to life? What are you doing to keep us from being beaten to death in the streets of your oh-so-precious capital?"

He growls and starts to glow- why the hell would he glow?- and answers me, enraged.

"Your people are liars and cheats and thieves, and have no place in Gallia. There is a new country that accepts your kind. Go there, and you'll find your equality, but you'll get nothing from me!"

I can hear Ranulf trying to make Skrimir shut up and back down, but hell if I'm letting him off easy. I'm pissed now, and this is going to end ugly if I have anything to say about it- which, apparently, I do.

"How can you do this to us? You can say we're not your people, you can say we're not the same, you can say we aren't equals, you can tell us we have no place in your country, but in the end we are your children. You created us- there is no us without you- and there is no way to get around it. We're your children, your grandchildren, your nieces and nephews and cousins, we are your kin and your blood! And no matter how hard you try, no matter how loud you scream, no matter how long you fight, you made us- and you will not ignore us!" I'm screaming now, and when did I start using the word us? There is no us- just me. What happened to me? Why am I so invested in this emotionally?

Skrimir bursts into a giant light and I turn my head and shield my eyes, only to look back and see a giant red lion charging at me. Yes, a giant red lion, who is pissed and looks like he could chew me in half with one chomp unless he decided to swallow me whole, in which case he could do that too. Volke grabs me around the waist and tosses me to the side, rushing Skrimir in what is probably the stupidest thing he's probably done in his life- and the last thing he'll ever do.

Skrimir lunges and Volke leaps out of the way, rolling and coming up immediately to slice the lion's flank. It's not deep, but it goes from his shoulder to his hip, and it's bleeding pretty good. I draw one of my own hidden knives, and fling it at Skrimir. It plunges rather deeply into his leg and sticks. Another flash of light and he's human again, grimacing and clutching his leg. He pulls the knife out and tosses it on the ground. A priest rushes over to inspect the wound, and I go too.

"Get away from me," Skrimir growls at me. I ignore him and look at the priest.

"He needs poppy straw for the pain and cayenne to stop the bleeding," he says to me.

"Done and done," I say, but he stops me before I run to get it.

"I'll get the herbs- you keep him from bleeding out too much."

Uh, what? Hell no! But the healer's already gone… oh Ashera goddess please don't let him eat me, I don't want to be eaten!

I look around and find the knife. I clean it off and look at Skrimir, and I have a pretty good idea of what the expression on my face looks like. Best to handle this with my own special form of diplomacy.

"I know you don't like me, and that you want to kill me, but I promise that once we're done I'll let you do just that, but for now- do you trust me?"

"Of course not!"

I inspect the knife and flick a grain of sand off the edge of it. "Good," I say with a smile, "You'll live longer."

And I press as hard on his wound as I can.

Skrimir roars and attempts to grab my neck, probably to throttle me, holy Altina's twin blades his hands are huge, and Ranulf does his best to hold him back. I switch out with another laguz and quickly jump out of the way to avoid having y windpipe crushed by one of the lion's monstrous hands.

I see the other healer coming back, so I leave. It's time for me to go- the meeting will go on for another two or three days, but I'm finished with these people… especially Skrimir.

"Katja, you can't leave."

Like hell I can't. I can leave whenever I want- I'm surprised they didn't forcibly remove me after the blunder I made at the meeting. Way to make an impression, Freak: stab an important guy in the leg with a weapon you're not supposed to have after challenging and insulting him. Oh, and having to get your ass saved by Volke? Yeah, nice touch, idiot. Really, you deserve a round of applause for being that much of a screw up.

"I shouldn't be here, Volke. I don't want to be here- all I want is to be left the hell alone. This war has nothing to do with me anymore, because I left the Branded army and became a loser thief with nowhere to go. I don't want any of this. All Bastian wanted was to get me involved with politics and away from the streets, but being a criminal is what I know best. It's all I know."

The assassin doesn't answer me. I throw the rest of my things in my bag, making sure that Jessob is packed as well; the boy has a habit of leaving things behind.

When I'm sure we're ready to go, I step up to the tent's exit, only to be blocked by Volke. His arms are crossed and his eyes steely… I'm not getting by, am I?

Damnit.

"Um, hello? Katja?"

Oh. It's the guy I ran into- why is it that he knows my name and I still don't know his? Stupid mistake on my part; won't let it happen again.

"I have a guest. Am I allowed to see him or are you going to kill me first?"

I shouldn't have said that, but it works: Volke moves aside and I step out of the tent, closely followed by Jessob.

"Hey," the man says, and I allow myself to indulge in the heat of his voice- hey, it's cold outside, don't judge me!- before answering him.

"Hey yourself. Did you need something, um… you know, I never did catch your name."

"Tormod, and I just wanted to talk to you. Where you headed?"

Tormod… sounds like a lovely name… very nice. Right now, I couldn't care less.

"Home. Nobody needs me here, or wants me here, and I'm already tired of the politics even though I've been here for less than a day." I have no filter for my mouth: lookout, world, Katja will chew you up and spit you out! Rawr! Okay fine, maybe not rawr, but if he doesn't tread lightly I'm gonna rip his throat out. Why is he so damn chipper anyway? I stabbed a lion king! Fear me, human! What's wrong with you? Stop being so happy, how do you do that?

"Well, I for one will be sad to see you go. By the way, I thought your speech about not needing a special spokesperson for the Branded was right. And your challenge to Skrimir. People are people, no matter what blood runs through their veins: holding them separate and refusing to acknowledge or equalize them is ridiculous."

"It was a childish outburst, and no one seemed to take it seriously… I was stupid, and I let my emotions take control… wait, what?" What? He thought I was… right? That's possible?

"No, it wasn't childish- it was anything but. It was well articulated and very blunt, which is a nice change. I don't think I've seen Sanaki so flustered since the Goddess War."

Oh. Well, la-di-da, Empress Purple was flustered by my pointing out of her- and everyone's- flaws. Big surprise there.

"Anyway," Tormod continues, "I, at least, would appreciate it if you'd stay. I think I'd like to hear more about your opinions and ideas on equality. I think you'd be very interesting." He hesitates, then adds:

"And I wouldn't mind seeing you after the council was over as well."

…

….

…..

Oh.

Oh.

He's interested in me. In me. He thinks I'm interesting, and he's interested in me, and he doesn't know that I'm a thief or an assassin or a mercenary or Branded. This is… I don't even know. I have no precedent to compare this to. I don't know how to react. Volke has heard this whole exchange and probably thinks that I'm an idiot for not replying right away. Think, Katja, think! Say something, anything, no not anything, say something witty! Yes, that's it, something like-

"Well, maybe I'll stay then," I smile.

-not that. Goddess damnit Me, why would you do that to yourself?

Guess I'm staying a while then.