3.

"Are you sure it's okay, leaving him alone like that?" Loz asked, clearly worried.

Yazuu shrugged. "Worst that'll happen is he'll thrash the Turks until Shinra hands over Mother, in which case we're all screwed."

"Um, was that supposed to make me feel better, Yazuu? Because, you know, it didn't, not really…"

"Hush, they're coming!" Yazuu paced around to the back of the stolen truck, where a number of kids had begun to assemble.

One pointed up at the hastily-painted sign on the tailgate. "Where's the punch and pie?"

"There isn't any," Yazuu told him. "But I'd like to ask you a question."

A few of the kids left on hearing there wouldn't be any free food. The ones who remained looked curiously up at the pretty stranger in skin-tight black leather.

A particularly small boy tugged on Yazuu's sleeve. "Are you a pervert?"

"Call me when you're taller."

"So, what did you want to ask us?" whined a skinny girl clutching a funny-smelling moogle doll.

Yazuu chose his words and spoke clearly to the small crowd. "Your mothers or caretakers, who do they look to for guidance in family things? If you were to name the perfect homemaker, who would that be?"

The kids mumbled amongst themselves, and for a moment Yazuu feared they were about to bolt. Then one tiny girl did run, but only as far as the news kiosk. She swiped a magazine and hurtled back toward Yazuu, a look of urgency on her sweet larcenous face. "Her!" the girl cried, thrusting the magazine into Yazuu's puzzled grasp.

A few of the kids who had gotten a look at the picture on the cover nodded.

"Yeah, that's the one!"

"My ma says she's like a guru or something!"

"She's perfect!"

"Perfect, eh?" Yazuu whispered, staring at the magazine.

"Hey! Where's my money?" shouted the newsmonger.

Loz aimed a Velvet Nightmare at the man's head. "This one's a free sample. Ain't it?"

The vendor backed down.

As the kids began to disperse, Yazuu thumbed through the magazine: article upon article on cooking and decorating, on being a gracious hostess and maintaining a cheery home. So far, nothing any different from the library rags. He snarled a little, despairing of finding anything useful.

And then he saw it. Bold print, page 42.

How to Host the Perfect Reunion

"Bingo."