Elena's POV

The whole house is quite. I am again the one to wake up first and it takes me less than a few minutes to get out of bed. I'm just like that- most people, they like to prolong things-I don't. The faster you get over with something, the better, then you can move to the next one and the next one and get all your work done, while the rest of them are still wondering how they should do it. I don't know when I became like this-when I was little, I used to enjoy everything, I was never in any rush to get over with a certain moment-I enjoyed it all. I used to love every little thing that surrounded me. Actually, as I think about it now-I was probably really living my life, something that I'm not sure I know how to do anymore.

I had everything in life I could ask for and yet I felt lonely and distant from it all. It was like I wasn't an acting participant in the stuff happening around me. Nothing actually felt real, nothing was worth remembering. Even going out with my friends seemed shallow and stupid and I made the conclusion that I was only doing it because I have to, not because I really want to. Their company was nice-they were all good and joyful people and I really tried to smile and talk to them they way they did with me, but when it came to the moment we would have to separate I always let a deep relieved sigh out-clearly happy that I was on my own. I couldn't understand why it was like that-I was surrounded by people, moreover-people who loved me and accepted me for who I was, even if that was a nerdish girl with big glasses, who enjoyed spending time in the library. I guess that if it wasn't for Caroline everyone would just mock and make fun of me, not that it doesn't happen now from time to time as well, but with her…well let's just say that no one is eager to mess up with the school's queen bee.

I honestly have no idea what it was about me that made Caroline stick with her childish choices-when we were kids we were inseparable. Now..well now she thought that nothing has changed at all, but for me it has. We were together, but then again-we weren't. She lived in a whole different world from mine-she liked to party, to go out with boys, to do millions of stuff for the students committee, to organize events while I preferred to stay at home, read my books and drink my tea in silence. I liked to think about stuff, to observe them. Yeah, I know that I was rushing through everything in life, but that didn't prevent me from actually paying attention to everything that was surrounding me-I liked to observe people and their little habits and try to think about who they were, what their lives were like-all stuff like that.

There were still two people I couldn't figure out completely though-one was Caroline and the reason why she held on me so tight? Maybe it was, because I helped her with all the school stuff-the homework, the assignments? I know it was a very selfish reason to point out and I felt bad for even thinking like this but still..I somehow couldn't get it out of my mind no matter how hard I tried. Once this argument appeared in my head, I couldn't help but notice all the small details in her behavior that hinted me to that direction. I tried pushing those thoughts away though-mainly because she was my only friend and I owed her big time. If she wasn't bend on walking with me through the hallways I would've been the most bullied girl in the school. Ok, it's true that when we actually walked together I was on the bottom of the queue of cheerleaders and worshipers following her everywhere, but then again, like before-let's not dig too deep into the matter.

The other person was the boy I met at the gym yesterday. There was just something about him that seemed so vague and it was like he was trying to make himself as more invisible as possible. He wasn't like the rest of the people in the school who were shallow and easy to read-there was more about him, something that confused me and left me asking myself what was wrong with him? And with me actually…since I never really paid attention to boys. Why was I doing so now?

I silently cursed myself as I was brushing my hair-I forgot to ask Caroline about him. She knows everyone in this school-she would surely tell me what his name was. I wasn't eager to ask her because she would make the wrong conclusions and she would definitely start nagging about how I'm always noticing all the wrong boys who weren't even cute and stuff like that so I was definitely trying to avoid the subject, but something inside me just kept bothering me. Why on earth did I need to know? He was just some idiot, who was rude and probably stupid-since he failed everything.

I kept pushing the thought about him all morning so when I finally went down the kitchen to make some coffee I was surprised to see my parents already there-ok I was definitely loosing track of time and it even seemed like I was going to be a little late. My mom threw me a surprised glance and my dad asked if I was sick-my sweet father, he was always so concerned about me. I can't blame him-he was a doctor after all and he noticed all the tiny details in people's health or behavior, but sometimes he really worried more than my mother and that was getting on my nerves. I was a patient girl though and I never opposed him-after all I was trying to do everything the way I was supposed to, I wanted to be perfect-for both of them and maybe deep down I also tried to compensate for my brother's Jeremy inability to be serious about school and life as I was.

Currently he was trying to become popular, like the rest of the bigger boys in school and ever since he joined the basketball team, he went to all the parties Tyler Lockwood organized in desperate believe that he will somehow catch their attention and they'll let him be part of his inner circle. I saw that as a pure act of stupidity-but then again he was a boy and he wanted to fit in and unlike me-he didn't have a friend to help him out. He saw this as a fight, a competition that he just has to win so that he wouldn't be left out and I honestly felt sorry for him-I don't think he even liked football.

Before dad dropped me and Jeremy in front of school he asked me a thousand questions, trying to figure out whether or not I was really ready for our Biology exam today. He was really desperate in making me like the subject, because he wanted me to become a doctor-just like him. The only problem was that he didn't knew I had no such intentions and that I actually hated the thought of it-God, I get sick when I see my own blood.

But he was just bend on trying to make me like it. He took me with himself to the hospital so many times when I was little and even let me play with some of his stuff, which as a kid-I found amusing and that let to him getting the wrong impression. But I didn't dare speak up and tell him the truth-he had a good soul and he was always so worried about me and Jeremy and who wanted the best for us. He was a good man-the problem was that he owned my dreams.

Once I realized he was bend on making me his female copy I decided that the least I could do is not disappoint him so I started studying, reading extra stuff, signing up for extra classes and that made him feel great while I was suffering with my inability to speak up for myself and tell him the truth. With time I just accepted that my future is already written and I stood up late at night thinking about how I will look in ten or twenty years and it honestly terrified me.

I jumped off the car relieved to get rid of all those questions he had for me-sometimes I found it hard to breath. Sometimes..all I wished for was to get out of here, to just disappear and start somewhere else-in a new school, with people I had no idea about and definitely without my father breathing in my neck and reminding me how I should read this book or that one.

And yet I didn't even make a single step on my own.

I spent the day wrapped in my thoughts. I think for the first time in a long period I didn't let the teacher's words sink in. I definitely wasn't listening to what Caroline was saying either and I'm not even sure I remember what we had for lunch in the cafeteria. At some point the only realization I made was that we had Math today and the boy with the sandy messy hair wasn't there.

"Elena! Are you even listening to me?" I heard Caroline raising her voice in the middle of the hallway.

"Yeah, yeah I am" I nodded a few times in order to assure her that I was indeed paying attention to her.

"So you're going to wait with me right? We won't take long I promise."

"Wait …where?" I asked confused and she let a deep annoyed sigh out.

"For me to finish practice with the cheerleaders, yeah? I told you this morning."

"Oh..well ok, I will wait." she smiled and clapped her hands happily. That's the thing about Caroline- she get excited easily-the smallest things make her feel good. I keep wondering how a person could be like that? Or more like-why wasn't I like that?

After we're done with our last class, I make the realization that she's taking me to the basketball gym and I for a moment I stop abruptly a little before we enter the place, praying silently for him not to be inside.

But of course-he's there. And as soon as he sees the cheerleaders in their brand new colorful uniforms he furrows his eyebrows angrily and heads to the seats while bouncing the ball on his way there.

I unwillingly make my way there as well and sit down relatively far away from him, but he's a ball of energy that just doesn't sit down for a single minute so he stands up and fools around with the ball every now and then. I open up my Math stuff and start dealing with the homework, but stuff are just not going the way I want them to be and I mess up the whole thing. For a moment I realize that I've even stopped paying attention to him until I finally made the realization that someone's sitting a few seats behind me and nervously shakes his feet which makes the whole row shake as well and my back is actually trembling from his absurd impatience. God, this boy was annoying.

"Will you please stop?" I turn around angrily and he looks at me quite stunned from the fact that I was actually starting a conversation with him. He suddenly stops but throws me an angry look as well then he looks down to the ball in his feet and takes it in his hands. I notice that there are bruises on his knuckles-great, so he was also picking up fights.

I turn back and stick my nose to the books, but I can't seem to find the solution so I just keep scratching every single line I write.

"Just use the formula from the previous lesson." he lets out clearly very annoyed and I turn around to face him, but instead he gets up and moves down the latter.

"What? But-"

"Yeah, it makes no scene, but it's like that. Just try it." I look at him stubbornly but then go back at the equation and try what he tells me to. I can feel his look on me and when I finally end up with a decent answer I realize that I don't want to face his winning and satisfied look, but I search for him anyway, only to find his calm green eyes locked on the the jumping cheerleaders in front of us. He wasn't looking at them like the other boys do, though- he didn't want to charm them or make them like him-on the contrary-he was throwing glances at my best friend that I'm pretty sure could have the power to kill someone.

"How did you know?" I ask suddenly and surprise even myself

"I just did." he shrugged his shoulders and I look at him confused "Oh, let me guess" he starts again, this time with a knowing voice "You think I'm one of those athlete retards who has no idea how to write his homework, yeah?"

"No." I shook my head, but then decide to be honest anyway "Ok, yes. I do. Or..I did."

He avoids my stare and sits down again, this time closer to me, but still far enough. I put down my books and stare above myself for a little while.

"Well…thank you..." I say as I realize that I forgot to do that, but the end of my sentence just hangs up in the air, because I still don't know his name.

"Stefan." he helps me. "My name is Stefan."

I smile in his direction, but he doesn't smile in return, he just looks down at his feet again, trying to make himself appear distant.

My mother used to tell me that some people are just like that-that they get sad easily and at a young age, that they prefer to be alone and shut themselves from the whole world, but that doesn't mean they don't want to talk. They just forget they can do that without anyone judging them.

I wondered if with him it was like that, because he seemed pretty comfortable in his skin-it was as if being there all by himself somehow completed his world and made everything simpler. I found myself feeling jealous, for a moment I wished for his life-to be away from everything and everyone and just do what I want-read my favorite books all day long, without anyone scolding me for not studying or doing what I was supposed to.

"I'm Elena."

"I know." he answers a bit rudely "Everyone knows you. Or I guess it's better to say they know a version of you, cause no one can really know another person without actually speaking to them" his last sentence surprises me. Something inside me just switched and I gave him a surprised look, but again, as before, he didn't pay any attention to my attempts to make an eye contact.

"Oh yeah? So what do they talk for me than?"

"I have no idea. I don't listen to gossips." he answers quite offended that I took him for this type of guy.

"What do you think then?" what the hell is wrong with me? I never speak to boys like that! I never even talk to them at all.

"What do I think?" he finally turns towards me "How is this relevant to the conversation?"

"It's not. But we are in a big old dusty gym, waiting for this boring practice to be over with because we both can't stand it and our only desire is to get the hell out of here, am I not right? "

He nodded, because he obviously didn't think there was something else he could add to my assumption. We agreed and remained in silence for a few minutes while he was obviously debating whether or not to speak his mind. He didn't seem like a guy who talks much anyway.

"You probably are. But I don't make assumptions just like this. It's stupid to try and label people. You are who you are and I honestly don't care about it because I have more important things to figure out like how to win the game tomorrow." he's not rude. He's being honest and that seriously is the first time a boy amazes me. He then stands up and start searching for something in his bag. I notice that the girls will soon be done and I catch myself praying for them to take a little longer. His takes off his sweated shirt and gets another one out of his bag. To me it seems like this is the only thing he ever puts there-clothes and trainers. I notice another big bruise this time on his right side-it's greenish on the verge of getting black, which meant that he had got it recently. "You seems smart and kind, but I can't really be sure if I'm right, because I don't know you. You may be just a girl with big dreams waiting for the right moment to achieve them or you can already have your whole future planned in front of you." he puts his new shirt on and leans down to fix his shoelace "I don't know, Elena. I'm absolutely sure that I have no desire to know either, because we both know what will happen once you get out of this gym in a few minutes-you won't even think of me again. You might see me in class or in the hallways but you'll just look away and in ten or twenty years at some class reunion you will struggle again remember my name, just as you did today so…Again I don't see how any of my opinion is relevant to the conversation." he spoke the words slowly and patiently. Then he stood up and took off to the other side of the gym where the girls have already stopped jumping around with their pompoms and have headed to their bags.

"Stefan" I called him and he turned around abruptly. He waited a few minutes until I finally spoke the words out "Good luck tomorrow."

He nodded and was on the verge of turning around when he stopped and looked back at me.

"Good luck with life." he mumbled, barely audible and nodded as an addition to his words. As if he was trying to say goodbye, it was nice to see you here, but life is just like that-you won't talk to me ever again and I'm glad with it so have a nice life and good luck.

And I found this to be incredibly sad.

Stefan's POV

I finally got home after eleven in the evening again. Actually, I think it was close to midnight and the only thing I wanted to do was get a shower and go to sleep since tomorrow I would have to get up early again and on top of it- I won't be able to skip classes because I missed too much this week and I was really on the verge of probably getting expelled.

On my way home I thought about Elena and the conversation we had. Honestly, I never really pictured her as the type of girl who would talk to someone like me, but I guess I was wrong, which is why I refused to give her my opinion on her or actually..on everything surrounding us, because if I have done that then we would probably spent the rest of the day arguing about something since she seemed like a stubborn one to me and she would definitely try to oppose me in every way possible.

Before I could even take my shoes off my mother opened the door looking pretty worried and I immediately realized something was wrong.

"What's going on?"

"Damon" she spilled a little more relaxed after she saw me. She has probably been waiting for me for quite some time "You have to go find him, he's drunk again. I called him but he just hung up on me. "

"You've gotta be kidding me" I let out annoyed, but mostly pissed off by the fact that he has done this again. I leaned down to tie my shoes back on and handed my mother the bag "It's ok mum, I'm gonna find him and bring him back. Don't worry about it."

"Don't take too long." she said and caught my wrist as I was about to leave "Please."

"I won't, I promise."

And just like this I was out again. Honestly, the evening was quite nice, it was warm, even though there was a light wind. For a moment I even wanted to smile to myself but when I remembered reality I suddenly forgot everything good there is about life.

I love my brother, I really do and even though we fight a lot and he does all those stupid things I'm never going to be able to be mad at him for more than fifteen minutes, because I know he has his reasons. Each of us is burying himself in the thing that keeps them alive so that we could forget about reality-we were like this, both of us, stubborn, relentless and we tend to do all the wrong things for all the wrong reasons instead of actually dealing with the problems we had. We weren't much different when we were kinds-I really looked up to Damon and that often got us both in trouble. My mother had a really hard time with both of us, because whatever he did, I wanted to do as well. And I found him to be that cool big brother who never left me out even when he grew up and started going out with girls. Well yeah by that time he was way too different and I was often on my own but he also tried to find time for me and to never leave me behind because he knew that when I mess up something I never tell anyone-I just try to deal with it by myself and that usually pissed him off, even though he was doing the same thing. He was drunk now and he would want anyone to go look out for him so I'm pretty sure he would just start yelling at me angrily and he'll be annoyed that mother send me here.

And of course I wasn't wrong. When I found him at his usual place- a bar near the factory where he worked, he was sleeping on a table in one of the corners. I silently thanked God that he hasn't got into a fight or something like that as this has happened before and I was often involved as well, simply because I couldn't watch him swinging his fists in the emptiness before him without even the slightest chance of hitting the person who offended him. And I couldn't stay indifferent to all this as well, because when someone was rude to my brother he was rude to me as well and he had to understand that nobody makes fun of us. We were together in absolutely everything-that's how it worked.

At first I start talking to him but he didn't really understand what's going on until I finally throw his arm over my shoulder and get him up. Then he starts cursing as usually and by the time we are out he's already managed to sink in the fact that his brother is the one getting him out of this hole he's once again in.

I get us in a cab and when we arrive home mother is waiting for us on the doorpost with her hands crossed on her chest and a very serious expression-she's mad, I can tell. She's only like this when she has gone out of her mind and for a moment she meets my brother's blue drunk gaze. He tightens his grip as well, obviously realizing what was going on, but trying to get rid of her judgy stare.

"Jesus Christ, Damon!" she starts after we have finally closed the door behind us.

"Mother, don't" I try but she throws me a dead look as well and I decide to shut my mouth for the moment.

"It's ok, Stefan let her bash on me. "

"I'm not bashing on you, I just want you to stop doing this. It's not about me anymore-it's about yourself. You're ruining your life."

"Well I feel pretty great, with the exception that my head hurts a little so I don't see what the problem is here." he continues with his usual irony.

"Damon" I scold him silently, trying to stop him from saying stuff he will regret later.

"Damon what? I'm old enough to do whatever on earth I want." I put him on the kitchen couch while mother nervously starts preparing me dinner because she just can't stay in one single place. She keeps mumbling stuff under her nose angrily while I try to make my brother get back on track, but he's just too sleepy and won't even listen to my words.

"You might be old enough but you have a family. Don't you ever think about those around you? Your brother came home only to go back out in less than two minutes because of you!"

"Oh well too bad for him. "

"Damon!" I say again with the hope to prevent another scandal, but my mother has turned back towards us again with an even more furious than before.

"Do you even know that he has a game tomorrow? That he has spent the last weeks training and that they lost all the games they had until now? Do you know how much he really cares for you? Do you know that he wakes up at night to check if you have come back home?" OK, I didn't realize she has heard me doing that. Now I'm stunned. My mother is surprising me with all those confessions that she's spitting in my brother's face. "Where were you when all that happened, huh Damon?"

"I was at work! And I'm sorry that my brother's been fooling around with a ball while I was bringing money home!"

"Don't you dare talk like that!" she raised her voice. And my mother wasn't a person who liked to raise her voice.

"Mum" I stand up abruptly, seeing where things were going to and trying to prevent them from getting further down the line "It's fine."

Damon was also pissed off by this moment and he stood up beside me which almost caused him to fail, because he was still quite drunk.

"You are accusing me of not knowing what was going on with my own brother, but do you know what's going on with your son?" he grabbed my wrist and pulled me with himself closer to the table so she can see better what he intended to show her "He's been fighting again" he made a pause, trying to let her process it all while I refused to meet her stare and was desperately trying to get away from my brother's strong grip. "But I guess that's not relevant right? I mean what so wrong with that anyway, he's playing basketball, that means it's all fine, right?"

"Damon, stop it!" I say still desperately trying to get free

"You are afraid that I'll end up in some gutter, but I think the one who's going to scare the hell out of us is my little brother here so stop bashing on me for having a few drinks and start actually looking around yourself. He's fucked up and his grades suck." he didn't even look at me, his eyes were pierced in my mother's "I have no idea how he's not expelled by now" he finally let go of me and for a moment we stood like this in silence. I was afraid to look up and meet her brown sad eyes being disappointed for the numerous time in me.

My brother left us alone in the room and I desperately wanted to follow him.

"Is this true?" her voice was very silent. She wasn't angry anymore, she has given up, I could sense it. She had no power to deal with me anymore, not tonight for sure.

"Yeah." I said because I couldn't lie. I wasn't the kind of person who would start searching for excuses or give her lame promises. I expected her to continue talking. Actually, I realized I wanted her to-I wanted her to yell at me, to be mad and pissed off, to send me to my room and ground me, but she didn't. Instead she sat down back on her chair and stretched to get the cloth she was now sewing from the place next to her. I waited some more, but since she didn't say a word I walked away from the kitchen without even letting a sigh out. I had this weight inside me that prevent me from even breathing normally, let alone do something else.

I couldn't sleep the whole night.

And I heard her crying in the kitchen in three in the morning.

A/N: I'm still not sure I should keep writing this.

I hope you liked this one.