Stefan's POV

I was watching through the window while Mrs. Williams was explaining something about Jane Austin, or at least, I think it was about that. I wasn't even trying to listen to her, there was so much more going on my mind. I realized, I was slightly smiling to myself at the thought of Elena. I don't think that in the past few days I had any other thoughts, to be honest. She was my everything- the day, the night and the in between of this hopeless reality, which was only bearable, because she was present in my life. I buried my hands in my hair, but for the first time, not because I was desperate, but because I felt myself blushing as I imagined her lips pressed on mine and the way I have held her in my arms and how small she felt in my hands, how light she was in my embrace and how happy and careless her expression was. I closed my eyes as I was trying to remember how it felt to intervene my hand with hers, how she smelled, how important her words were. I didn't dare think of something bad. I knew that things don't work out just like that and yes, I was afraid, but I couldn't allow myself to think about any of this. I didn't want to go there, I knew it was inevitable, but right now I preferred to live in this beautiful and for the first time in my life, happy reality. I preferred to think of her, to drown in the memory of her small cold fingers tickling me and making me laugh out loud.

My thoughts were interrupted by the abrupt opening of the door. The slight mumbling coming from the cheerleaders behind me immediately stopped. There was nothing but silence suddenly surrounding the whole room.

YESTERDAY:

I was gently stroking her hair as I listened to her steady breathing. It seemed as if she has fallen asleep and honestly, I wouldn't blame her. She's been working too hard those few days, going to the tutor center and studying for the tests we had next week, trying to prove once again how smart and great she was when it came to human anatomy, when there was no need for her to do that-I knew what she was capable of and even if she had an F on this, she would still be the best Biology tutor in this goddamn school.

Nothing much has happened after she came to my house that day or actually…maybe too much has happened and I just hasn't been able to comprehend it with simple words. When I'm thinking about how I could describe what we went through for only four days, I find it hard to express it with only one word or sentence. I remember that when I was a kid, I was watching my mother and father exchanging gentle kisses or touches in the kitchen. He would lift her up and spin her in his hands, while her hair flew all around them and made it hard to see what was happening. Other times, after he has come home from a long day at the factory, he would just slowly come behind her back and embrace her arms, while she was putting a small kiss on his rough palm. I remember watching them from the kitchen door, they never knew I was there of course, and I wondered if this is what the grown-ups call love. Now, when I have her in my arms, I guess that's exactly what love is-being next to somebody, hearing their heartbeat while they are gently sleeping in your arms, trusting them enough to give into them. I smiled as she moved slightly and let a small sigh out, but didn't open her eyes. I smiled again and closed my eyes.

"What are you thinking about?" I suddenly heard her voice and opened my eyes only to face her sleepy stare "You seem serious."

I leaned down and kissed her forehead in order to calm her down, then got back on my pillow, actually her pillow, since we were in her room as her parents were both at work and her brother was at football practice.

"I'm not thinking about anything." I lied and put my hand behind my neck, trying to raise myself up a bit, so I could see her better. She furrowed her thin eyebrows, which almost caused me laugh out loud as it made her appear so sweet, just as if she was a child, but I tried to remain serious and let a deep sigh instead, while calming myself down.

"You're lying." she said stubbornly as she searched for my other hand and intervened my fingers with hers on my chest. "If it's about Caroline and the sign-"

"Hey, hey" I suddenly interrupted her "Don't think about that. It's been a week and they still haven't figured it out. I'm pretty sure they'll just let it be. The principal has bigger problems, than investigating who wrote on the lockers with an orange spray.

"You are underestimating Caroline" she said worriedly and I tightened my grip in another desperate attempt to calm her down, but she pulled her hand away only so she would trace the scar on my palm with her index finger.

"Don't worry about it." I caught her hand and kissed it gently "Come on, you gotta get ready, I'm taking you out."

"What?" she asked surprised and stood up abruptly "Taking me out? Stefan, I don't have anything to-"

"Shhh" I put my finger on her lips. This girl worried way too much for a seventeen year old. "Go put on one of those summer dresses you have and I'll be waiting for you downstairs, before your father came home and prevented me from taking you away tonight."

"My father's not the problem" she said knowingly and crossed her arms on her chest, then jumped over and found her place just where the belt of my jeans were. I sighed in awe-I could watch her like this all day long, in her sweet white tank top and her light summer skirt, which allowed me to trace her body with my hands easier. I swallowed hard, thinking of how I love her being so close to me and how I'm willing to give my life away, only so I could have this for the rest of my life. She has already unbuttoned the better part of my shirt before she fell asleep as she has been complaining about me having the opportunity to enjoy her while she never had the chance to really touch me "because of those stubborn-buttoned plaid shirts" as she claimed.

"Elena, don't be a smart ass, let's go before they get back."

"Only if you tell me what we're doing" she said and tickled me playfully, which surprised me and I moved so abruptly, that I almost caused her to fall down, but managed to raise up, catch her slim hands in the last minute possible and we ended up with our faces so close to each other that I found her staring at my lips, obviously craving for us to collide once again. I figure exactly what she wants, so I pull away in order to tease her , but since we're too close to each other she starts tickling me harder than before and I hurry to catch her hands and prevent her from torturing me anymore. Her laugh fills the room and she stops moving or trying to get away, which is when I let go of her wrists and hurry to get it back at her.

"Steeeefan!" she yells in protest "You can't do this!"

"Oh yeah?" I respond and lift her up as I finally find my way out of this bed. She places a kiss on my bare shoulder and moves my shirt down, but I don't allow her to go any further because I am smart enough to distract her with my fingers moving up her waist and stopping just before her bra. She gasps, but I silent her sweet moan with a kiss. For a moment, I almost lose my balance, because she embraces my waist with her cold feet and my back ends up on the wall. When we finally decide to stop as we are finding it hard to catch our breath we remain close to each other, our foreheads barely touching.

"Stefan" she start seriously and looks up with her concern brown eyes. I know what she wants to talk about-she wants to dig deep in all those bad stuff that I'm trying so hard to stop thinking about. She wants to ask me what will happen when I leave or why are we doing this now when we are doomed to fail, she wants to find some hope, she wants me to tell her that it will all be fine, that no matter what, somehow things will work out.

"Don't, Elena." I prevent her from doing so "Not now. Let's enjoy ourselves tonight, you're going away with your father tomorrow and we won't see each other till Sunday." her father has insisted on them going to Whitmore college, where he was supposed to make this important lecture and introduce her to some of the best professors there, who would advice her about her future. She didn't want to go, or at least she pretended she didn't want to go-I knew that deep inside she did, because no matter how much she denied that she is not cut out for a doctor, I could see it in her eyes, back in that night when I was hurt and we came to this same house for help-she seemed eager, like she knows exactly what she's doing. She knew exactly where all the medications were, all the instruments her father needed. She liked it, she was just stubbornly trying to oppose her parents, because that's what every teenager did. I would hate for us to be apart, even if it was for a few days, but I was definitely willing to get over myself since it was all in her best interest and I surely wanted her to achieve the dreams she had, even though she wasn't exactly aware of them right now. I placed a kiss on her shoulder, trying to return the favor while she was gently rubbing the back of my neck with her warm hand. I tried to drop her on the ground but her legs remained still tightly supporting her body, on my waist.

"Come on now. Don't be stubborn." I warned her and she gave me one of those sad puppy looks, but pulled away and basically ran to her enormous wardrobe.

"Why can't I know where we're going?" she asked sadly and I honestly felt bad for her, but only for a short moment, before she has started throwing clothes out of there, in desperate attempt to find her something clean and obviously appropriate to her standards, to wear.

"Because you can't, Elena." I said calmly as if I was trying to console a kid, not the girl that I was madly falling in love with. I heard her sighing heavily and mumbling something under her nose and I almost laughed out loud "I heard that!" I added and she giggled. In fifteen minutes she finally got out of there, dressed in a beautiful light blue dress, matching my own shirt today. I gasped as I finally caught a sight of her and after a few minutes of simply staring like this from her bed she crossed her hands on her chest-a thing she did when she was pretending to be mad at me-and I shook my head, trying to get back to reality.

"I'm right here, Stefan" she stated "Waiting for you to decide when it's appropriate to stop staring."

"I'm sorry" I blushed and stood up with my head bowed down, trying to button my shirt. She slowly approached me, but I didn't look up, I only felt her lightly gripping my hands and removing them away as she obviously wanted to finish what I've started. I felt as if we both were much older than we were now and I looked at her and the way she was so concentrated in what she was doing. I swear I could imagine us being right here in twenty or even forty years and she would still be doing the same thing-helping me and my trembling fingers fix my shirt, while there are grandchildren running in the kitchen downstairs, arguing about which jam is tastier. I realized, right there, that I could spend my entire life with her and I the best thing is that my love will continue to grow more and more with each day as it was happening right now. I know how childish and naïve I must sound right now-I only met her not so long ago and people, okay, not only people, but the whole world is skeptically watching us right now, laughing at my believe that this woman will be next to me until the day I die. The thing is-I'm not afraid. No matter how much time passes, no matter how long we are apart, I still believe this. The day I stop believing it, will be the day I'm no longer alive on earth.

"That's better now" she said as she finally got to the top and brushed away my shoulders, trying make me look more presentable. She noticed my look and how deep in my thoughts I was and looked at me at first confused, then worried. I didn't kiss her though-it wasn't the time for me to do that, it was the moment I was showing how much I cared for her only by letting her see deep into my soul. She smiled and leaned on my shoulder, while I embraced her for yet another time today. It was like embracing my own world-that's how much that single move meant to me. "What are you thinking about?" she asked for the second time today and I let a small laugh out

"Some..boyish stuff." I responded and took her hand "Let's go now, before your folks decided to come back. I want you all for myself tonight." she nodded and we walked away from their enormous house and took down the street, towards my own place. I've prepared something like a small dinner at our backyard, trying to look romantic, though honestly, I found it to be a little stupid and cliché. I couldn't take her out to a real restaurant, not now when we were too bad on the money department as I had to give back all my savings to Damon for his feet painkillers. He felt pretty bad once he understood that I still had intentions of doing something special for her, so he started trying to figure out how to help me and came up with the idea of me cleaning our whole backyard of all the unnecessary junk there, mown the law and fix up one of the old wooden tables in the garage. More or less at the end of this, I joked with him that he should apply for a wedding planner position and he sighed heavily beside me, but continued giving me orders even until he went through the door and gathered with some of his co-workers while also warning me to be careful and act properly with Elena since she was obviously the only thing that made me act not like an asshole and honestly…I kind of agreed with him. As we approached our house, I covered her eyes, caught her tightly and walked her through the back of our house. It was getting dark and for the first time I really saw this place, which I was so used to, in a different way, that it almost made me smile and feel proud that my brother has come up with this idea.

"Stefan, what are you doing?" she laughed as I tickled her as I came behind her back, before I was about to take the cloth off her face "Where are we?"

I finally let her go and she gasped in awe as she realized what she was seeing before her, which for me was a complete surprise. I think I sweated so much on our way here that I needed to change my t-shirt as I believed that she would find this too stupid, cheesy and not at all romantic. I finally took a look at her face, since I myself has forgotten to come back to reality-that's how worried I was all this time. Her hand was on her mouth, I'm not sure she was even breathing properly if I have to be honest. I suddenly got scared that she finds it, after all, stupid and even ugly and I immediately started figuring out all the bad things in the view before me. The table seemed fine, I thought, okay the cover wasn't the best, but there were candles on and the plates, the spoons and the forks were put in the right place..or at least Damon said that it was all fine.

For a moment I forgot that I was holding a bunch of flowers in my left hand, behind my back and mentally slapped myself on the forehead-I should've given them to her before she opened her eyes. Anyway, I pulled them out and as she saw the beautiful while lilies a wide smile appeared on her face. When she decided to look up I saw tears in her eyes.

"Jesus, this is all wrong, isn't it?" I started worriedly "It's ugly, right? I told Damon that this table cover looks like-" and before I could continue she put her finger on my lips and I looked up stunned.

"Shhh" she whispered. I loved it when she whispered, it was like telling me that the words she's about to speak out loud are meant for me and only me and not even the universe is allowed to hear them "It's amazing, Stefan." she nodded in reassurance as I was still not making any moves, since obviously I was too paralyzed by both her beauty and what she has just said. When I got back on the ground I took her hand and led her to the table as I pulled her chair first and she sat down with a big smile on her face.

"This is amazing." she continued still obviously surprised

"Do you really like it?" I asked a bit confused, not sure if this is a dream or reality. I mean…she liked it? I did..okay? I did okay with a girl?

"I love it, silly!" she said playfully and I'm sure she would've pretty much tried to tickle me if she was closer to me. "Did you make it all by yourself?" she asked curiously

"Oh" I blushed and fixed up the top button of my shirt "Uhm, no Damon helped me with a few stuff and mother cooked." I skipped the part when mom prepared the meal for me and Damon, not for me and a girl I was taking home, but how does this matter anyway? I'm not sure mom is up to meeting the girl I was so in love with right now. I'm pretty sure she had bigger problems like how to take as much shifts as she can and what to do with me and all the troubles I brought home. It was hard for Damon to let go of the great steaks mom has made, but he swallowed hard a few times as he was leaving the house and reminded me how much I owed him. And God knew, I really did. I should start thinking how to pay him back.

The smile didn't leave her face even while we were eating. At first we were silent, sharing this intimate moment only between us, listening to the gently wind playing with both our hairs and taking a peak at the stars in the sky-communicating only by exchanging glances. It was the best feeling in the world, because I knew that understanding each other with words was important, listening to each other too, but when you can look at someone and they just speak to you with a single stare and that exact thing means an entire sentence then you got all you need-you've seen a part of that person's soul, he has allowed you to go deep inside them and take a good look at the world together, as one whole place. I couldn't have been more grateful for the fact that we were both understanding each other so perfectly right now, it seemed almost surreal as most of the things this evening. As we remained like this, I found myself falling more and more for her with every passing minute-the small gestures she did, the way she pulled away a strain of her hair, which was bothering her, or how she furrowed her eyebrows every time she remembered something bad, or the way she smiled when I gripped her hand over the table- slightly, gently, just letting her know that I'm here.

As we were just on the verge of finishing our meal she decided to suddenly stop and lean back on. I knew that she was obviously thinking about something, so I stopped as well and gave her a smile, even though she wasn't looking at me right now.

"What do you want to talk about?" I asked and she came back to reality

"You know how on the movies they show the cheesy stupid way the couples fall in love, how they go to a first date and talk about stupid things or discuss the people around them?"

I nodded in agreement.

"Well I think it will be hard for us to discuss anyone as we're standing in the middle of my backyard all alone and the better part of the neighborhood is already asleep, because they've worked all day long."

"I don't want to discuss people. I want to know you. I want to get to know you now, tonight, this minute. I don't care about the past or the future, I don't want promises, Stefan."

"Then I'm not about to give you any" I responded seriously and she nodded gratefully "So you don't believe in promises?" I started as she was obviously up for receiving questions.

"Promises are just words shout out into the nothingness, wrapped up in reality and blown away by the wind. That is all." she said seriously

"Good" I smiled at the smart way she expressed her thoughts and asked myself for the hundred time tonight if I really deserve this girl. "Let's hope that you change your mind by the time we have to exchange vows, Elena." I only added and she smiled, trying to tell me just with one glance that I'm being silly again, but that she doesn't really mind it. She has blushed, though. I wondered if she knew how serious I am? "But anyway, carry on! What do you want to know?"

She furrowed her eyebrows, obviously thinking about what she should ask next. We spent the next two hours discussing all kinds of subjects. She was eager to know what my favorite book was, what I think of love and war and politics-basically everything that comes to mind when you're discussing issues with a smart person and honestly it seemed as if I surprised her with all my answers. I'm guessing, I managed to break the jock stereotype she had in her mind for me. She proved to be a gentle soul who believed in science, not miracles or fate so we argued some on the matter and I could say that she pretty much enjoyed herself in proving her point. We weren't harsh on each other or calling each other stupid-we were just talking like grown people and I even asked myself if we're really only seventeen a few times this evening. She was just so smart that I could spent hours listening to her and I'm pretty sure I would never get bored, even if she proves me wrong like most of the times.

"Okay last question" she finally said as she realized how much time we've spent just discussing stuff "What do you want to do later in life?"

"I thought we weren't talking about the future, Elena?" I asked as I arched my eyebrow, trying to remind her that this was after all in a contradiction with her own words. She smiled knowingly though and crossed her arms in expectation. I smiled and shook my head-this girl was a stubborn one. Where did I find her? "Come here" I asked her to pull her chair next to me. She was surprised and she gave me a questioning look, but moved besides me nonetheless and as she did, I immediately put my arm over her and made her lean on my chest, basically for the selfish reason that I wanted to feel her closer to me, but also because I noticed she was trembling and I wanted to make sure she feels warm enough. I looked up at the sky and I knew she was staring at me in this moment, but I decided not to ruin it and simply smiled to myself as I was observing everything above us.

"In life I want to help people." I said silently and she leaned back on my chest, while also closing her eyes "We are all lost on this earth, we are all confused. Our ideals, our values-they change, but it is our actions that matter, they are what's constant. You're right when you said that words and promises, they are just a shout out into the nothingness, they do matter, but they get lost, just as we all do. Actions remain. I'm perfectly aware of the fact that I will leave this world one day as just another person, that no one will know my name, no one will remember me. The people I meet now won't be able to recall how I looked like in twenty years that's it, if they decide I'm worth even thinking about." I smiled as I stroked her hair. It was relaxing to just listen to her steady breathing on my chest, just as it was hours ago when we were in her room. I realized those small moments feel not just like hours, but like lifetimes as they carry so much meaning, as they make me complete. "And if they somehow decide to do so, they might as well remember me for doing something good for them."

At first she didn't say anything, I guess she was trying to process my words and somewhere right there the doubt, that I might have said something very stupid, passed through my mind again and I think I held my breath for a minute or two before she decided to speak up.

"Stefan" she finally said, moved up and gave me a small kiss, while burying her fingers in my hair again. I'm starting to think that she really likes doing that and of course, I don't mind it at all. I like feeling her gentle touch. "You are a good man and don't ever let anyone tell you any different, okay?" she said seriously and we stared at each other for a moment. I lift her up and she sat in my lap, our foreheads barely touching each other. I didn't want to believe her words simply because with all my actions until now, I've proven to be nothing but the opposite of what she was saying. I was a mess, a troublesome boy who brought misery to his own family.

"Elena" I tried to argue with her, but when I felt her hand on my cheek-a gesture that I usually did, I looked up and lost all words I had in mind.

"Don't say anything. Just remember it." she smiled and I nodded in response. Then she leaned back on me and I embraced her as if she was just a child in my arms. "Have you given a thought of how are you going to help people?" she asked, after we drowned in silence too much again.

"I have." I nodded more to myself, than to her as she was unable to really see my face "But I'm not going to tell you now."

"What?" she stood up abruptly with an angry expression on her face. "Why not?" I laughed at her being so mad about nothing and shook my head helplessly.

"Another time, Elena." I told her and when she realized how serious my voice sounded, she decided to let it be, shrugged her little shoulders and I hurried to pull her back in my embrace before she's has started arguing more on the matter. "But I do know how you're going to help people." I stated and I felt her moving her head helplessly behind my back "Even though you're desperately trying to deny that you'll never do that."

"I'm not going to be a doctor, Stefan." she said stubbornly as a kid, trying to prove her point.

"I didn't say anything now, did I?" I laughed and she poked me in the ribs, which almost made me lose my balance. We play around like this for the next half an hour until she starts to get tired and I lead her back inside, so I could find her something warm and take her home. On the way there, she falls asleep and I realize for yet another time how beautiful she is. When I stop a bit too abruptly, I curse myself when she opens her eyes and gives me a sleepy smile. I walk her to the door and give her another kiss, this time more eager, more persistent as I know that I won't see her tomorrow at school, or the day after that and being away from her breaks my heart.

"I'll miss you." she whispers just before we part.

" It's fine, you'll be back before you know it and I'll be waiting for you right on this porch." I said and she nodded gratefully as she gave me one last kiss on the cheek.

I let her go inside unwillingly.

NOW:

The coach is the person, who opens the door and breaks the slight mumbling of the cheerleaders behind me. For a moment, when I see him, I actually think that he might be here to tell me that he wants me back on the team and I am on the verge of smiling, but when his look falls on me, I realize that there's something off in his sad tired eyes. He's not here for something good.

"Mrs. Williams can I take Stefan for a moment. The principal's asking for him." he says with his deep hoarse voice and I feel my legs starting to tremble. Right in this moment, there, as I'm still trying to make myself stand up and not show any emotion, I realize that I know what this is all about-they've figured it out.

Mrs. Williams nods and I gather my stuff from my desk as I am fully aware that I'm not going back to class, I'm not going back at all, and follow the coach outside. When we step away from the crowd, which is already whispering, wondering what this is all about, we stop in the dusty silent hallway. I can't think clearly, I am too scared, so I just stop and in a few seconds he puts his hand on my shoulder. I'm trying to repeat the words Elena told me in my head, that I am a good man. And being good also requires to be brave and strong, to not bow your head down even when you're falling down, so I look up at him.

"They are going to expel me, aren't they?" I asked and realized how calm my voice sounded. The coach looked away and that's when my suspicions confirmed. He was a good man, a strong one-I mean after all we lost almost every game this season and he still found the urge somewhere inside him to push her to keep going and do better. He wasn't someone who would look away, unless when he feels bad for something.

"I'm sorry, son." he finally said and with his hand still on my shoulder gently pushed me to keep going towards the principal's office. I'm not sure, I completely realized what was going on. I wasn't asking myself who gave me up or how they figured it out, or what was going to happen now. The only thing I could see in my mind was her gentle smile from the previous evening and the way I held her in my hands, feeling complete, feeling happy. "That's it." I thought "That's the end. Nothing good lasts long in life. It all vanishes right in front our eyes, just like father used to say. Nothing is forever"

When we came before the door, the coach stopped once again and I wondered for a minute whether to get inside and get it over with or stay here and listen to just another apology he was going to give me. I decided to go with the first, but he was fast enough to catch my shoulder again.

"Your mother must be inside already." he warned me, as if he knew how much it would ruin me to see her in and he wanted to prepare me. I almost wanted to laugh-how do you prepare yourself for something like this? I haven't felt so desperate, ever since they told us our only living parent is sick and might die. Somehow, deep down, I've made peace with myself already. I mean, this wasn't a surprise, I was playing with my fate here, jumping away from the rock bottom that I was inevitably going to hit anyway, thinking that I can somehow outsmart those people and trying to push away all the bad thoughts from my head, when deep down I knew it all this time-I knew, this moment would happen.

What I wasn't prepared for, was to see the desperate look on my mother's face. You're never ready for those things. You may think about all the bad stuff that may or may not happen to you, but when it comes to other people you always push the thought of their disappointment away. What happens to you is easy-you can live through it, but seeing how it reflects the others around you might as well be the thing that kills you. I didn't really respond, but I didn't move either. Instead, he opened the door for me and gripped my shoulder once again in desperate attempt to either calm me down or support me, I couldn't figure out. It didn't matter anyway-it was all over.

Damon's POV

When mom and Stefan came home, I knew something bad has happened. It was my first day back at work and I was glad that I came home first, so I could be finally the first one to arrive before dinner. As I saw my brother's sad expression and my mother's mad look, I knew something has gone wrong. Honestly, I've never heard her be so stern on him before. She didn't yell, but she was beyond harsh and a few times while they were arguing in our kitchen, with me hopelessly staring at both of them, I managed to see the tears in his eyes and that made me come and sit beside him.

Mother was out of her mind. I guess we all knew that eventually they will expel him, but we were all hanging onto hope that somehow things would turn alright at the end, since he has been studying lately and trying to bring home good grades. He looked so ruined, as if he's finding it hard to even sit straight and the words she spoke to him were so hurtful, that if she was saying the same things to me, I would be probably out of the house in matter of minutes. She was disappointed. She was just so disappointed. He was supposed to be the smarter brother, the one who will go to college, not a lost boy with three expulsions in less than an year time. And honestly-even if she didn't speak up, the look in her eyes screamed desperation. She couldn't deal with this no more. She called uncle Zach as Stefan was still helplessly staring in the nothingness before him with my hand on his shoulder. I tried to calm them both down, to talk to them, but mother, as she was both full of rage and disappointment at the same time, was relentless. I was trying to protect him, to speak up for him, but she always cut me off until he finally interrupted me and said it was all fine, that mom should do what's necessary. And by the end of the evening, after so much yelling at him and after speaking up with uncle Zach, it was decided that he should leave in the morning, with the first bus to Boston and that our uncle would wait for him at the station, to welcome him, to help him out.

I didn't want him to leave, not like this. Yes, I've come to peace with the fact that sooner or later he was about to do so, but now seeing him so hurt and so desperate, I just couldn't help but feel like this wasn't the right thing to do, not right now at least. I tried talking to mom yet once again, but she was beyond relentless. I could see in his eyes how much he wanted to stay, even if it was for a day more and the reason for this was Elena. He wouldn't be able to say goodbye to her. But he was also stubborn. He tried to oppose mother and ask her for a few more days , but eventually he just accepted that it's going to happen anyway and maybe staying more and seeing Elena would make it even hard for him..and for her. Knowing my brother, he would probably just lie to her and tell her that he hates her or something like that, without sharing the information of him going away-he would lie to her so she would hate him and then he would leave. Honestly, I think them not having the chance to talk to each other was the better option and yet I knew how much in love he was, it was all over his face and leaving like this would cause him so much pain.

So, after I tried to talk to mom and failed in my task I went to his room and silently helped him pack, waiting for the moment when he would just break down and eventually as he was tossing a few shirts in his small bag he just kneeled down and buried his hands in his hair.

I watched him tremble and fall apart in front of me and my heart broke, but I had not time to think about myself, so I went beside him and hugged him tightly. We remained like this for more than an hour. My brother wasn't the one to speak up and let it all out and just admit that he's hurt, that it's too much for him to take- he would never do so, he would silently suffer on his own and he would never let someone else be involved in his pain, so of course, as usually he didn't say anything, even though I asked him if there's something he would like me do to or if he just wants to talk. He only mentioned her calling him early today and how eager she was to see him again. He didn't have the strength to call her now, he knew it wouldn't change anything, it would only make it way more painful than it already was. Plus, how do you tell the girl you fell in love with that you got expelled and your mother is shipping you off to the other side of the country? No…he couldn't do that, because he realized it was selfish. If he called her now it would be for himself, because he would want to hear her voice once again before admitting what has happened. Maybe the last thing they did together was special, the last kiss they had would be a better memory than a one-minute call after midnight.

Besides that he didn't mention anything else, the only thing he did was shake his head and look away from me as he was ashamed and afraid that I would see the tears in his eyes. He couldn't fall asleep, even if he wanted to and nether could I. So when mom went to her room, I helped him move on his bed and brought the bottle of scotch, I has bought for myself a few months back. We drank it all and he smoked his whole pack- he couldn't stop trembling, thinking, cursing himself, trying to beat the wall with his two bare hands until he completely gave up, being too tired to go on with anything anymore and fell asleep an hour before I had to drive him to the bus station.

When he was about to get up on the bus I asked him, if there was something he would want me to tell her.

"I love her" he said sadly "But that doesn't matter anymore. So don't fill her head with words that don't even have a meaning right now- lie to her, tell her that I was happy to go away."

I shook my head helplessly and watched him get on, with his ruffled hair, his still trembling hands and the big dark circles under his eyes. Mom didn't came to say goodbye, I think she was still trying to process it all and the time when she feels guilty for treating him so harsh has still not come. I was the only person to tell him goodbye.

I was also the last one standing there long after the bus was gone.

A/N: Okay, I'm gonna have to rant some here so I hope you're patient enough to bear with me and read it all.

So, this is the last chapter I'm going to write, which explains why I made it a bit longer. The next thing I'm going to post is a short epilogue from Elena's POV. So basically from now on you can trust your own imagination-you might see them as a happy couple, who was shortly apart and got back together after she graduated and moved to study somewhere closer to him or you might choose to believe they never crossed paths again. It's basically an open ending-you're free to believe whatever you want. That was my plan from the beginning if I have to be honest, no matter how cruel it might seem. However, a few weeks back when I was thinking about the end, I accidentally came up with a sequel for this story and it's been on my head ever since. I'm not sure I should write it, though as I'm not certain there would be anyone who would want to read it and I'm not going to start working on something and spending time on it for nothing as I have also another story, which I have completely abandoned these past few weeks. So in other words, I can continue if you want me to. I'll pretty much show them 5-6 years later and it will serve as a second part of this story, I'll continue posting here and I'll make it about the same size as this part-around 10 chapters, that is if my imagination and my messed up mind don't decide to dig deeper into it. So yeah...feel free to comment and let me know what you guys think about this. You can also find me on twitter my username there is basically the same: Flowing_lantern. Feel free to ask me if you have questions concerning the story as I know that sometimes I write stuff a bit confusing. Thank you once again for reading! It means a lot to me!