Thank you everyone for all of your reviews and favorites and follows! They have made me happy! And a happy writer is a productive writer, so here is another chapter!
On another note, there is a matter on which I am wanting some opinions from the general readership. I was mostly planning to write this story from Natsuno's point of view, but then I started wondering if it might be beneficial/interesting to see things through Tohru's eyes occasionally. Should I do multiple perspectives? I feel like I understand the characters well enough to do it, but I'm wondering what you guys think. Let me know! :)
The sun was going down over the hills around Sotoba. Within a forest made of nothing but jagged spears of charcoal, darkness bled through the remains of trees like water soaking into a cloth. The ash-laden air was almost entirely devoid of sound, creating an eerie effect throughout what had once been a lively forest habitat. The animals were all gone now, killed or chased away by the flames; even the birds neglected to fly over the ruined land, its strangeness disconcerting them and stoking their instinctual sense of danger. Indeed, the only noise heard in any part of the forest was a bedlam of hammering coming from a valley west of the ruined village of Sotoba. The mallet strikes pierced the air one after another, until at last they slowed in tempo and finally ceased altogether.
Natsuno Yuuki wiped the sweat of exertion off his forehead as he sat back on his haunches, gripping the hammer and propping another board up against the wall to his right. The jinrou was currently patching up the holes in the walls of a remote cottage which he had stumbled across several hours earlier. It was not the most desirable of locations- about half the cottage had collapsed, leaving a giant gash in the wall of the living room, but the room which he was currently in, a bedroom fitted with several beds, was almost entirely intact. This cottage had probably been used as an overnight lodging place for those people who had made their living harvesting the Momi fir trees surrounding Sotoba, and who were often obliged to spend large amounts of time working out in the woods, back when the forest had been lush and green. Poking around inside, Natsuno had found that several of the metal tools associated with this labor, such as the bundles of nails he was currently using, had been left unscathed by the fire. After he had amassed them together on the bedroom floor, he had embarked on a search for water, his throat parched and dry from inhaling ash all day. Unfortunately, this search had proven less than successful. The kitchen was reduced to a pile of rubble, and neither the bathroom sink nor the bathtub faucets produced anything other than blackened slime. In the end, he had concluded that he would just have to wait for it to rain. His hopes were reinforced by the darkened clouds beginning to roll across the sky, blocking out the rising moon. While he waited for the sun to set, Natsuno had taken up the hammer and begun to nail loose boards over the holes in the bedroom walls, more to give himself something to do than for any practical reason. He didn't plan to stay here for a long time. But at the moment, the jinrou did not want to think about the bizarre twist of fate which had led him out of the ruin of his second grave, and even less about the fact that he was not alone.
Tohru Mutou. He had placed the lump of blankets which was his former friend into a shadowed corner of the bedroom, and after checking to make sure the edges were still knotted, had not looked at it since. Now, as the sun sent up its dying rays, he had to resist the apprehensive urge to sneak a glance. Tohru should be waking up soon. Natsuno picked up the hammer again, grabbed another ragged board, and moved on to the next wall. The jinrou was aware that he was now stronger, faster, and altogether more resilient than the okiagari would ever be. Tohru was not a threat to Natsuno's physical safety, as he'd been when the jinrou had been human. All the same, he was definitely threatening his peace of mind. Natsuno had saved him, but now, what the hell was he supposed to do with him? They couldn't go back to being like they'd been before….Tohru laughing and carefree in his bedroom, and Natsuno wearing an exasperated frown, but secretly pleased by the other's presence. Those had been times he had not realized he would miss so much until they were gone….but gone they surely were now, covered by bloodshed and immolated in fire. Tohru had killed people. The okiagari had murdered Natsuno, turned down his outstretched hand and stolen his plans for a future. Yes, he had done so under extreme duress, but still…. I should be furious, Natsuno thought, hammering down as though his anger was the nail he was pressing into the wall. I ought to want him to cry, to be in pain. Stupid Tohru. I shouldn't want to help him. I shouldn't feel like I don't ever want to see him broken like that again…. It's not the same. Things aren't the same as before. He wasn't thinking about how to help me when I was still human, was he?
A sudden flurry of movement from the corner behind him caused Natsuno to glance over his shoulder. The blanket was moving in a jerky, agitated manner; he could see the edges of limbs pressing against the thick material. So Tohru was awake. Did he remember what had happened during the day? Natsuno couldn't think of anything to say, so he eventually just called out, "Hey."
The blanket twitched and grew suddenly still. After a moment, Tohru's soft, frightened voice sounded from beneath the folds. "Natsuno….? Where are we? What's happening?"
The jinrou set down the hammer, the noise causing the blanket to twitch again. It had only just occurred to him that the sound of hammering might have scared the okiagari. Natsuno stood up and began to move across the floor toward the lumpy blanket. "It's all right," he said matter-of-factly. "We're still in the forest. I found a bit of shelter. I was just hammering boards over the holes in the walls; that's all."
The blanket shifted around silently for another moment. Natsuno could detect the press of hands against the inside of the fabric. Eventually, Tohru spoke again. "Then….may I….come out?"
"The sun has set," Natsuno confirmed, drawing up beside the blanket. Part of him wanted to leave Tohru to his own devices, but on the other hand, he didn't want the okiagari tearing the blanket. They might need it later. Stooping, Natsuno swiftly unknotted the top of the fabric and watched as Tohru emerged, glancing hesitantly in all directions. His former friend was wearing camo-green pants and a white T-shirt, although it couldn't really be called 'white' anymore with the amount of scuffing it had taken. His exposed skin was also covered in soot, especially his face and neck, as though he'd fallen headfirst into it at some point. He had no shoes, only extremely dirty socks, and his legs were still tightly bound at the knees and ankles. His blonde hair was tousled and unkempt, just as Natsuno remembered it when he'd first met him. Tohru turned from his examination of the room to gaze up at the jinrou; his eyes were huge and red and looked like they held nightmares behind them. Once again, Natsuno had no idea what to say. His confusion was clashing with his realistic sense that he ought to be angry at this person, at Tohru…. Huffing in frustration, the jinrou wheeled around the tried to stalk away. He had only gone a step when he felt an ice-cold hand seize the ankle-cuff of his jeans. Instinctively, Natsuno jerked away and flipped his body into a defensive position, only to find Tohru still sitting harmlessly on the floor, staring up at him with those huge, red eyes. Growling in irritation, Natsuno snapped, "What?! What do you want?"
Looking almost as confused as the other felt, Tohru reached out toward the jinrou's arm. "Natsuno…."
"Knock it off!" he demanded, taking several blurring steps back. "Don't use my name, and don't touch me!"
The okiagari bit his lip and lowered his eyes to the floor. "I'm sorry…."
Muttering to himself in irritation, Natsuno strode to the center of the room where he'd amassed all of the metal tools. Choosing a steel knife from within the pile, he shuffled back over to Tohru and held it out, blade-first. The okiagari tensed and curled his body together.
Natsuno scowled fiercely. "I wouldn't have carried you all this way if I was just going to kill you when we got here. Take this, and cut yourself free. However, if at any point in the future you try to prey on any more humans, I will find you and restrain you again so you can't hunt. I have no intention of unleashing you on whatever is still left of the world. Understand?"
Still staring determinedly at a point below Natsuno's eyes, Tohru nodded silently and took the knife in his hand. The jinrou returned to his pile of construction materials, gathering up the spare nails and clinking them back into the container as the harsh sound of steel sawing through rope filled the air. Soon, he heard the ropes give out and the okiagari breathe a tiny sigh of relief, shifting his legs around freely. Natsuno heaved his remaining boards over his shoulder and carted them over to the last un-boarded wall as Tohru made a shaky attempt at standing up. The jinrou stubbornly pretended that he wasn't keeping track of what the other was doing as he located a good-sized hole and measured out several boards to cover it. The first strike of hammer against nail precipitated a little cry from behind him. Natsuno turned to see Tohru fallen back to his knees, clutching his hands over his ears. That was right…. Metallic sounds….were frightening to okiagari. Natsuno picked up another nail and turned back to the wall. "I know you don't like this sound, but I have to cover up these holes so no rainwater or sunlight can get in. I'm almost done. This is the last wall." That was as close as Tohru was getting to an apology from him.
Natsuno kept hammering, determinedly keeping his back turned to the other. When at last he was finished and every opening had been covered (thank God there were no holes in the ceiling,) he breathed deeply and surveyed the room, looking over his handiwork. His eyes caught onto Tohru; the okiagari was pressing himself into the furthest corner from him, hands clasped desperately over his ears. From deep within his traitorous heart, Natsuno felt the uneasy urge to comfort his former friend. He immediately beat it back. Dropping the hammer and nails into the pile of tools, the jinrou meandered over to the curled-up figure. "It's over," he announced loudly. "Don't touch me!" he was obliged to add a moment later, as Tohru's hands involuntarily reached out toward him again. Still shivering, the okiagari stood up and the two stared at each other in uncomfortable silence until Natsuno was distracted by a sudden tap on the bedroom window. He jumped immediately, his memories flying back to another bedroom, another window, to that unexpected knocking that had sealed his fate…. But after a moment, he recognized this tapping as the sound of raindrops against the glass. Finally!
Hurrying back to his pile of tools, Natsuno dithered impatiently as he heard the raindrops thicken upon the ground. His mind whirled through necessary schematics. Earlier he had found a few intact buckets and cups in the ruins of the kitchen, which he had set aside for collecting water….but where should he pour the water when they became full? He wanted to have as much as possible….. Seizing upon a sudden idea, the jinrou grabbed the blanket and hurried into the attached bathroom. The sink and bathtub were full of ash and debris, but Natsuno went to work quickly, tossing out the bigger pieces and using the edges of the blanket to sweep the ash and little wooden splinters onto the floor. It would have been much easier if he'd had a broom, but this would have to do. He was working so intently that he did not see the lanky figure of Tohru standing in the doorway. "Natsuno…." the hesitant voice murmured, "do you….need help?"
The other shook his head rapidly without glancing up. "No. I'm fine. Move." Hurrying back into the bedroom, Natsuno shook the blanket out, tossed it on a bed, and practically ran through the half-destroyed living room into the completely destroyed kitchen, where he'd cleared a little space to keep the buckets and cups. There was no foliage above the cottage to block out the rain, so he spread his collection around the space freely- two gallon-sized buckets, a large saucepan, a medium mixing bowl, and several cups which were somewhat chipped, but still usable. Hurrying back into the bathroom, Natsuno pressed the seals over the drains in both the sink and the bathtub, then whisked back outside to wait for the kitchenware to fill with water. It was slow going. They were all different sizes, so the cups filled up first, and Natsuno carried them carefully through the bedroom and emptied them in the now-clean sink. He stared for a moment to make sure the seal was working effectively, then brought them back outside and repeated the process. He couldn't resist opening his mouth to let the rain fall in as he waited, sitting calmly in the open and not even caring about his dampening clothes. He could feel the pure water flushing out the terrible, suffocating taste of ash. Soon the sink was filled up, and Natsuno was obliged to start pouring the larger buckets and bowls into the bathtub. He wasn't sure when it would rain again, and he had no intention of taking his chances.
Helpful or not, as Natsuno hurried back and forth on his water-gathering mission, Tohru followed shyly behind him like a lost puppy. He didn't speak, seemingly afraid he would annoy Natsuno again, but he didn't seem to want to be by himself. The jinrou ignored him as officiously as he could, but as he moved around he thought to himself that he really should have expected this sort of thing. Tohru was obviously traumatized by what he'd been through before Natsuno had found him, and afraid of being left alone with those memories. Although the fallen log had blocked the okiagari's view of his fellows' suffering, he had doubtless been able to hear their agonized screams for hours upon hours before they finally ended….and this compounded with the horror of knowing he was next, watching the line of sunlight drawing slowly nearer and being bound, unable to flee….the primal fear of dying alone. Natsuno snuck an uneasy glance over at Tohru, who was currently standing aimlessly in the corner of the living room. What exactly was he supposed to do about that? He wasn't a psychologist. And anyway, hadn't Tohru visited that same fear, along with its fulfillment, upon him?
The rainfall came to a close as Natsuno poured the last of the buckets and bowls into the nearly full bathtub. It had taken hours to collect, but at least they now had a reliable source of clean water for the immediate future. Plunging his hands down into the sink, Natsuno cupped them together and lifted them to his thirsty lips, drinking deeply and letting the excess water roll down his neck and over the pale flesh of his chest. He could not deny that it felt absolutely wonderful, cleansing. Suddenly seized by an idea, the jinrou rummaged around in the drawers below the sink, pulling out a blue washcloth. He filled the mixing bowl halfway with water, and wandered back into the bedroom, noticing Tohru sitting curled up in the corner across from the door. Second-guessing himself, Natsuno stood there for a moment, saying nothing, until he found the will to push through his apprehension and approach the okiagari. Setting the bowl on a bedside table, Natsuno sat down on the bed beside it and dipped the washcloth in the water. "Tohru, come here," he called, using the other's name for the first time since he'd found him on the hillside. Red eyes lifted up in surprise as the blonde boy stood and cautiously approached the bed. Natsuno indicated for him to sit down, and he obeyed. Biting his lip, the jinrou placed the mixing bowl in his lap and partially wrung out the washcloth. "Hold still," he commanded, and reached across the space between them.
Tohru made a little sound in his throat as the cool cloth touched his ice-cold skin. His eyes slid closed, and he leaned his face into the material as Natsuno slowly began to rub it back and forth over the sooty smudges, every moment fighting his instinct to separate, to push back. Forcing his body to lean toward Tohru was like trying to press himself through a concrete wall….and yet Natsuno kept at it, rubbing the cloth in little circles upon the okiagari's still face. He was thinking somehow that if he could wash away the obvious physical signs of what had happened to him, Tohru might feel better….not that he gave a damn whether his murderer felt better, he just- didn't want to deal with those eyes, that was all. Those huge red eyes, looking so lonely and guilty and lost…. Tohru hadn't looked like that at all until he'd risen. It was as though the rest of him had returned from the dead, but his old smile had stayed buried in the grave. Natsuno twitched when the okiagari's hands rose up and curled around his wrist. He thought that Tohru was going to either pull him closer or push him back….but the blonde boy applied no force to the hold. He just held on, completely ignoring Natsuno's earlier instructions, just like he usually did. The jinrou rolled his eyes, dipped the cloth back into the water, and tilted Tohru's face so he could wash the other side. He was certain he could see the okiagari relaxing as he brushed the cloth softly over the eyes and lips and forehead, lightly wetting the curls which framed them. Out the open door of the bedroom, he could see the first hints of sun begin to crack the horizon line, just visible above the ruined kitchen wall.
Tohru yawned, looking as though he might fall asleep on top of him. Realizing that he'd gotten closer than he'd intended, Natsuno finished his ministrations and leaned back, dropping the cloth into the water. He tried to pull his hand away, but Tohru was still awake enough to hold on. Frowning, Natsuno shook the okiagari's shoulder lightly. "Wake up. You can't fall asleep just yet. Go into the bathroom now and wash off the rest of your body. There are more washcloths and towels in the drawers; put some water in the buckets and use that. Just don't dip any cloth into the sink or bathtub water if it has soot on it. We don't want to contaminate the fresh water. All right?"
Tohru nodded slowly, but gave no indication of actually moving. Huffing indignantly, Natsuno reached over and mussed his already-unruly hair, causing his eyes to snap open in surprise. "Go!" the jinrou insisted, and Tohru finally stood up and wandered into the bathroom. He glanced behind him hesitantly before he closed the door. Alone at last, Natsuno carried the mixing bowl outside and dumped the sooty water into the wasted dirt surrounding the kitchen's ruins. He arranged the kitchenware in its former places, in case it rained again, and stared up into the dawning sky. It still felt eerie and unusual to be surrounded by a forest full of dead trees. Unnatural. For the first time since he'd woken up, Natsuno allowed himself to think of the way things had been when the forest had been green. His family…. He was fairly certain his mother was dead. He wondered if his father was by now as well. Even if he wasn't physically departed, the last time Natsuno had seen him, his mind had certainly been gone. It was tragically ironic in a way….they had always prided themselves in being so intelligent, so avant-garde, against the grain of society. They had expected him to be the same way, to share their ideas and ideals….one of the main reasons his childhood had been such an uncomfortable experience. And now look what they had come to. Look how they had ended, killed by mythical creatures in a backwoods village a million miles away from anything important. Natsuno clenched his fists in fruitless anger, staring up into the sky. It wasn't fair. They hadn't deserved to die like that. Maybe they hadn't been as clever as they'd always thought they were, but that was hardly a capital sin. Hs father had not meant to let the okiagari into the house. He had not meant to kill Natsuno by removing his only protection against them. He had been blind and bullheaded, but he had not deserved to lose his wife, his son, and his mind all in the same day. That was too much. Too much cruelty. Maybe the dead forest really was an appropriate setting for their current situation, Natsuno thought grimly. The world was a wasted, cruel place that dealt out horrors at the throw of a dice, without caring who was good and who was evil. Maybe it would have been better if it had all burned down, if none of them had survived this all-consuming nightmare in Sotoba.
"Natsuno….?"
The jinrou turned around to see Tohru lurking in the shadows behind the bedroom door, unable to emerge now that the morning light was splitting through the charcoal points of trees. His former friend's voice reminded him that despite his existential despair, at the moment he was still 'alive,' and therefore he must find a way to deal with that. Sighing, Natsuno draped the washcloth over a stone to dry in the sun, and ambled slowly back into the darkness of the bedroom, pushing the door closed behind him. Tohru looked much cleaner now. He was barefoot and shirtless, only his green pants still hanging off his body since he had nothing else to wear. At some point, they were going to need some new clothes, Natsuno mused. He didn't like the idea of being stuck in these misshapen garments for any longer than he had to be. Tohru looked like he was about to fall asleep standing up, so Natsuno guided him over to the bed they'd been sitting on earlier, and tapped his toes impatiently while the okiagari climbed in and burrowed under the covers. The jinrou gazed around the darkened room, checking to make sure he hadn't missed a spot when boarding up the walls. The bedroom was sealed in tightly against the outside light. He was definitely a woodworker's son. Natsuno was just about to head over to one of the other beds and take a nap himself, when he felt the shock of an ice-cold hand close around his wrist. Staring down into the tangle of covers, he observed Tohru's large eyes peering up at him. "What?"
"Natsuno…." the okiagari mumbled, tightening his fingers, "Will you….will you still be here when I wake up?"
For a moment there was silence. Then the jinrou muttered gruffly, "Yeah, I'll be here. Okay? Sleep now, Tohru." The other turned his face into the covers, his eyelids drooping lower and lower as he neared unconsciousness. Natsuno considered pulling away from his icy hand, but he did not until the dark red eyes had closed completely, and Tohru had entered the depths of a comatose sleep beyond human understanding.
Well, that chapter was...interesting, yes? ;) Not much dialogue, especially on Tohru's end. I didn't feel like it would be right for these two to start talking right away. And then I noticed that they seem to speak volumes, even when they're not saying anything. I'm really glad that I recently stumbled across a singularly awesome AMV on Youtube which led me to watch this anime! Which then subsequently led to the creation of this story, which I am having a lot of fun writing.
Until next time! :)
