Push and Pull

The sound of the waves crashing over the soft white sand should have lulled her to sleep, but somehow, she just wasn't tired.

She sighed, pushing herself up into a sitting position. Everyone else appeared to out.

Ever since they had defeated the titans and left the walls to explore the rest of the world, she hadn't slept well. She wasn't quite sure why. It might have been that her dreams were plagued with the screams of her dying comrades. Or maybe it was simply because there was so much to do and see that she didn't have time for sleep.

But Mikasa guessed that the true culprit behind her restlessness was the stubborn, brown-haired boy who happened to be curled up in the sand next to her. She watched the steady rise and fall of his chest with fascination. She made note of the way his mouth hung open, and she memorized the sound of his slow, consistent breathing.

She loved to watch him sleep. She loved to watch him smile and laugh. She loved the way those beautiful green eyes glimmered in the sunlight and the way they lit up when he looked at her. She loved moments like these when she could sit and watch him breathe and know that they were both alive.

But it had been almost a year since the fall of the titans. The both of them were almost twenty, and yet, she still had absolutely no idea how he felt about her.

She shrugged the blanket off of her shoulders and pushed herself up onto her feet. She wasn't entirely sure were she was going, but she knew a late night walk might help her clear her mind.

Her feet sunk down into the wet sand as she walked along the shore. The waves rolled down on top of her bare feet, and the cold ocean water took her by surprise. The cool sea breeze blew her white dress up, and her shoulder length black hair whipped along with it.

Somehow, walking alongside the moonlit blue waves, Mikasa felt pretty. Even though her hair was tangled, her dress was dirty, and she had sand wedged in between her bare toes, she felt pretty.

She couldn't help but wonder if Eren would think so too.

Mikasa blushed and cursed herself for thinking such thoughts. She had taken this peaceful walk to forget about her childhood friend. Instead, like the waves drifting toward the shore, she felt her mind being pulled back to him.

It wasn't like they didn't talk. In fact, he had been paying attention to her more and more. He was still Eren of course- moody and angry and stubborn as hell- but since they defeated the titans, he was a happier moody, angry, and stubborn as hell. At the very least, he was more like the Eren she fell in love with all those years ago when he saved her life for the first time.

He smiled at her and they laughed together and they stayed up late sometimes to talk about the past or how they thought the world was created.

It certainly seemed like there was something else there, but the two of them had never really talked about it. Granted, Eren was absolutely terrible with words and feelings, but she needed to know. She needed to hear him tell her what he really felt.

She sighed and made her way out of the ankle deep water. The sand stuck to the bottom of her feet as she trudged toward a large rock formation. She leaned back and slid down against it, settling into the silky sand.

She pulled her knees up against her chest and found herself staring up at the night sky, painted with thousands of glimmering white lights. They weren't nearly so beautiful from inside the walls.

"Amazing, isn't it?"

She jumped at the sudden sound of a familiar voice.

"Eren!" She looked up to see the cause of her insomnia staring down at her with that handsome, rare smile of his. "You scared me!"

He took a few steps toward her and lowered himself down on the sand next to her, leaning his head back against the stone to get a better look at the stars.

"Armin says that there are more stars up there than grains of sand on every beach in the world," he continued. She watched in fascination as he picked up a handful of the smooth white grains and let them fall slowly out of his hand.

"I'm not sure I believe that," she admitted. Her shimmering gray eyes met those gorgeous green ones for the first time that night.

"Well," Eren shrugged, "If Armin said it, it's probably true."

She laughed and shifted her gaze back up to the darkened canvas and the white specks that dotted it. It seemed like every time she looked up, there were more of them. Maybe Armin was right after all.

"I'm guessing you couldn't sleep either?" She asked after a moment of peaceful silence.

"Well, I was asleep," he began, "but then I woke up and saw you walking along the shore and-" he hesitated, scratching the back of his neck, "I just wanted to spend some time with you."

She felt the blood rush to her cheeks and hoped that the darkness was enough to hide her blush. She had the urge to change the subject entirely, but somehow she felt like this was heading in the direction that it needed to. This was a conversation that was going to have to happen eventually.

"And I've…um…" he stuttered, "been meaning to talk to you, Mikasa."

Oh God. She could have sworn he could hear her heart hammering inside her chest.

"I just," he started again, "Uh…really like talking to you…is all."

"Oh," she looked down, hoping the disappointment in her voice wasn't too obvious, "what did you want to talk about?"

She dragged her finger along the sand, carefully tracing all of the characters that spelled out her name.

"I don't know," he shrugged, "stars…I guess."

Mikasa sighed and leaned back against the rock, closing her eyes. Why did that boy have to make everything so difficult?

"I look up at them, and I just," he sighed, "feel so small. So…insignificant. Sometimes I get so caught up in my own little world that I forget I'm just a small part of something so much bigger."

"Yeah," she spoke quietly. She really didn't know what else to say.

"In the walls, I felt like my world was too small," he continued, "but now, looking up at all of this and watching the waves roll onto the beach, I think I'm the one that's too small."

She nodded to let him know she was still listening. She stared out across the endless, shimmering body of water and couldn't help but wonder how big it really was.

"Armin also says," he interrupted her thoughts after a moment of silence, "that the ocean is so big and deep that no one really knows what's at the bottom. It's completely dark. Isn't that scary?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "Not as scary as the titans though."

He smiled and stared up at the stars once more.

"Listen, Mikasa," he began, "I didn't really follow you all the way out here to talk about stars and water."

"Oh?" She tucked a lose strand of hair behind her ear.

He scooted away from the rocks, lying down on his back with his head facing her. She copied his movement and found herself lying with her ear down in the sand facing him.

"I wanted to tell you…" he paused for a moment and looked down at the sand, "I wanted to tell you how afraid I am."

Again not what she had been expecting to hear. Her eyebrows furrowed down in confusing, and seeing this, he elaborated.

"I'm scared because the ocean is deep and dangerous and scary," he admitted, and the childlike fear in his eyes showed her that he was speaking from the very bottom of his soul. "I'm scared because there are more stars out there in that big unknown darkness than tiny grains of sand on this beach."

"But most all," he continued, eyes brimming with sincerity, "I'm scared because I think I'm in love with you," he whispered.

Even though one of her ears was pressed down into the sand, she heard him clearly, and he truly did sound terrified.

"Eren," she breathed, "I-"

"Shh," he pressed a finger to her lips, "don't speak. At least not yet."

"Close your eyes, Mikasa,"

Her eyes fluttered shut, and she could feel his breath against her face. His lips grazed her cheeks before gently settling on her lips. It took them both a few seconds before he began to move his lips against hers, gently tracing his tongue along her bottom lip before slowly pulling back.

It wasn't perfect like the fairy tails Armin told them about they were kids. It was a slowly and inexperienced, but it made her feel alive nonetheless.

She opened her eyes and noticed the tears shimmering on his cheeks.

"Eren," she smiled, cupping his cheek with her hand, "why are you crying?" Despite the accusation, the tears in her own eyes were becoming dangerously close to spilling over.

"Because I love you," he smiled crookedly, "and that scares me, but," he reached up to wipe the tears away before wiping away her tears as well, "it also makes me so happy, Mikasa."

"I've always loved you, Eren," she admitted.

"Yeah, I know," he sat up and pulled her into his arms, "but it took me until yesterday to figure that out."

"And you figured that out all on your own?" She asked with a smile. She nuzzled her face into his chest and closed her eyes, curling up against his warm body.

"Well," he hesitated, "Armin might have helped a little."

She laughed as she felt his arms tighten around her. Thank you, Armin.

"This…um…still isn't what I wanted to talk to you about," he mumbled into her hair, planting a kiss on the top of her head.

She tilted her head up in surprise. "Oh?" She asked. "You sure do have a strange way of avoiding things, Eren."

"I know…I know…" he laughed. "But I'm getting closer."

She looked up into his eyes from her place against his chest, letting him know that she was waiting and listening.

"I've been thinking," he began slowly, "after this whole exploration thing is over, maybe we could settle down somewhere. We could get a cabin out in the woods, just like the one you grew up in. It would be just the two of us, and maybe if you wanted to," he hesitated for a moment, "we could have kids. A boy and a girl. And we could give them the childhood the two of us never had."

"Mikasa," he gazed down at her through tear filled eyes, "let's get married."

"Okay," she smiled, her eyes glimmering with happiness.

He smiled back, leaning down to kiss her softly on the lips. "Okay."

XX

A/N- The fluff is strong in this one! I wrote this about a month ago in the middle of the night and reread it just now for the first time…and I may have gone overboard with the fluff. But I have no regrets.

Thank you all for reading! Also, thank you for the feedback! It's greatly appreciated. I'm debating on continuing this oneshot collection after Eremika Week, so if anyone has any ideas they want me to write out, just let me know, and I'll let you know if it's something I can do!

Thanks again,

-Eremika