Something Broken

A/N- Someone (whom I cannot remember…it was a long time ago) requested drunk Eremika. I'm kind of assuming they wanted something funny and fluffy, but this is what came out of my dark mind. Sorry. For those of you who also made requests, I still have that list and I am working on it. :) It just may take me a little while. Anyway, have some angsty/fluffy drunk Eren Eremika set in the canon universe.

XX

The hallway was eerily quiet.

A few nights ago, the very same hall had been roaring with life. She breathed out and closed her eyes as images of doors thrown open and smiling faces flashed through her memory. The sound of laughter and vibrant chatter echoed in her mind as she pictured the lively, candlelit scene from two nights ago.

But when she opened her eyes, all of those images faded, and the dull, empty hallway came back into focus. Tonight, it was anything but lively.

After all, at least a third of the soldiers previously living on this hall were dead, and those alive remained stunned and petrified behind the privacy of their closed doors. To say the least, the previous day's mission had been a crushing failure.

Now, the only thing she could hear were the floorboards moaning underneath her feet as she walked. She breathed out a sigh of relief as she neared the end of the hallway and her final destination.

She stopped in front of the old wooden door, the flickering light from her candle illuminating the familiar room number.

Slowly, she lifted her arm and knocked lightly on the door.

"Eren?" She called out softly, fingers curling around the doorknob. It was unlocked.

Cautiously, she pushed open the door and peered inside. "Eren, I know you're in there," she spoke again. She spotted him sitting motionless on the other side of his bed. His back was facing her, but she could tell from the sloppy dirt stains on his white t-shirt and the messy tuffs of brown hair sticking in every direction that he was not handling this as well as he normally did.

"Hey, I just want to talk, okay?" She spoke softly, slipping in through the cracked door and pushing it closed behind her.

"What happened wasn't your fault you know," she began, making her way around the bed to sit down next to him. "There was nothing you could've-"

Her eyes caught the glimmer of the candlelight dancing off glass as she rounded the corner of his bed. Her gaze fell to his lap and the half empty bottle of dark liquid that swirled around in it.

"Eren, what are you doing?" A sudden rush of alarm shot through her. Where did he get that? How much had he already drank?

"Relax, Mikasa," he replied, bringing the bottle up to his lips and taking a few big gulps. "I'm just having a drink, okay?" Her eyes widened as she watched him wipe the droplets of stray alcohol on his sleeve.

"Eren, stop!" She reached out to grab the bottle from him, but he quickly pulled it out of her reach. "Where did you even get that?"

"I borrowed it," he shrugged, raising the bottle to his mouth once more.

"You stole it?! Eren, if you get caught stealing from the higher ups, you'll-"

"Do the math, Mikasa," he interrupted, "there's a 50% chance this belongs to a dead man."

At that she froze.

When their eyes met for the first time that night, she understood that he was right. She felt his hopelessness prickling hot beneath her own skin as she studied the heavy bags beneath his normally breathtaking blue-green eyes. Tonight, however, they didn't hold the flame they normally did. They were tinted red, and Mikasa couldn't decide if it was from crying, drinking, or lack of sleep. Most likely a combination of the three.

"Eren, stop," she pleaded, reaching out for the bottle once more.

"Nope," he shot back taking another swig. "You're not my mother."

His mother. Her death was what drove him. His motivation and determination to move forward was what made him bounce back so quickly from catastrophic missions like these. It wasn't that it didn't hurt him, he just never let it stop him. For him to be this broken…this unmotivated…was so unlike him. She couldn't help but wonder what the breaking point had been. What made this mission different from all the others? But that didn't matter now. All that mattered now was that her childhood friend, who had always been so strong and driven, was falling apart in front of her. It nearly killed her to watch.

"Eren!" She shouted as he began to gulp down more.

Quickly and instinctively, she reached out and swatted the bottle out of his hands. As she watched it shoot through the air, she immediately regretted the decision. She scrunched her eyes shut, awaiting the inevitable sound of breaking glass.

And it was loud. Not as loud as she had anticipated, but it surely woke up anyone who had been sleeping in the surrounding rooms, and if it hadn't, the string of curses that followed surely did.

"Son of a bitch! Mikasa what the hell are you doing?! You almost smacked me in the face, god damn it!" He shouted as he stumbled to his feet. "Shit, are you trying to wake up the whole damn hall?!"

"Eren, calm down," she stood up after him. She eyed the brown liquid slowly spreading across the floor and the shards of broken glass that Eren was stepping dangerously close to. "You're drunk. You need to just-"

"This shattered into a thousand pieces!" He interrupted her to continue shouting. "You realize we have to clean this up, right?"

Her eyes fell back to the broken bottle. He was right. It was destroyed beyond repair. In this case, they could simply sweep up the pieces dispose of it, but some broken things were worth too much to simply be thrown away. Unfortunately, anything valuable that shattered would be as equally impossible to fix. After all, something broken, even if fixable, could never be the same.

"Eren please," she tugged on his arm, pulling him away from the mess. "You need to just calm down and listen to me!"

"No," he muttered coolly. She cringed when he tugged his arm out of her grip. "I can handle this on my own! I'm gonna go get a towel and steal Levi's broom."

"Eren, wait!"

But he only made it a few steps before he began to lose his balance. She watched helplessly as he stumbled forward toward the shattered glass, hands reaching up to grab his most likely throbbing head. One…two…three steps and he was beginning to regain balance, but it was too late. She cringed at the shrill scream that left his lips when his foot made contact with jagged shards.

She leaped forward to catch him as he stumbled backward into her waiting arms.

"Shit!" He cried, wiggling out of her grasp.

"Eren! Are you okay?"

Quickly and unsteadily, he reached down and yanked the piece of glass out of his foot. Even while drunk, he made it look easy, but the cringe of his face and glimmer of pain in his eyes told her that he was too stubborn to show how much it actually hurt.

For a moment, he swayed unevenly, and she thought he was going to fall once more. Quickly, she reached out and grabbed his shoulders to steady him, looking him directly in the eye.

"Eren," she spoke softly. She could hear her own voice quivering with concern.

"Shit, Mikasa," he finally whispered, "I'm dizzy."

She sighed, somewhat relieved that he finally let his true condition be known. "Let's get you cleaned up, alright?"

Gently, she led him back over to his bed and sat him down, propping the wounded foot up on the edge of the mattress so she could see the cut.

By the looks of it, the wound was deeper than she had anticipated. Thick droplets of dark blood trailed down from the injured arch of his foot and dripped steadily off of his heel, splattering onto the wooden floor below.

"How bad is it?" He gasped, letting out the breath he'd been holding back.

"Bad enough," she sighed, tearing her gaze away from the cut. "You're a titan though. It'll heal fast."

She caught his grimace as she turned and walked toward his dresser. All rooms in the barracks were required to contain a medical kit in the top drawer.

Then, he whispered something so quietly she almost missed it.

"Doesn't mean it can't hurt,"

She froze, hand hovering over the small, white box. She let the meaning of his words sink in.

"Eren," she spoke softly after a moment. She scooped up the medical kit and returned to his side. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She pulled out the clean white paper towels and waited for him to speak. Gently, she wiped the dripping blood off of his heel before pressing it down over the wound.

She cringed when he instinctively pulled his foot away from her momentarily before relaxing again.

"You know," he spoke after a moment, voice just above a whisper, "it's always hard. After these missions I mean…but," he hesitated for a moment, "I always try to move forward because I know I can do it, Mikasa! I want to end this so badly that I'm willing to forget about those bloody battles and move forward but this time…" he drifted off into a brief silence.

"Eren," she pulled the blood-soaked towel away from the wound. "I'm going to put some disinfectant on this, okay? It's gonna sting a little…"

"That's good, though," he answered. Her eyes shot up in surprise. Did he know what he was saying?

"Physical pain," he continued, "is so much easier to handle than the hell burning in my mind right now."

She could feel her hands shaking as she poured the clear liquid onto a fresh towel, and without warning, she pressed the damp cloth against the wound.

"Gah!" He gasped immediately. She grimaced at the way his eyes scrunched shut and his eyebrows crinkled. The white sheets beneath him were now clenched firmly in his tan, calloused hands.

"You know," he groaned after the initial pain had subsided. "They said that this would numb the pain. That the alcohol would make me forget but," he swallowed painfully, "I can still feel it, Mikasa. It hurts so damn bad."

"Eren," she felt tears prickling at the corner of her eyes.

He wasn't like this. He wasn't supposed to be like this. He was the strongest, bravest person she had ever met. How could he be falling apart like this now?

"I just…" he continued, tears building up in those gorgeous eyes of his. "I just don't know what I would do without you, you know?"

Her head shot upward in surprise. It wasn't what she had been expecting to hear. Cautiously, she reached for the white bandage wrap and began wrapping it around his foot.

"It really hit me hard this last mission," he confessed. "I think that's why I'm such a mess right now."

"What do you-"

"I care about you so much," he interrupted, the tears finally spilling over and trailing down his cheeks. "If anything ever happened to you, I don't know what I'd do. You've just always been there, you know?" He whimpered. "But you're not invincible and neither am I, and I just…I just don't think all this would be worth it without you standing by my side at the end."

"E-Eren," she stuttered. She could feel the heat rushing to her cheeks and quickly convinced herself that it was the alcohol speaking.

"God, Mikasa," he shook his head, clearly fighting back his own emotions, "I'm so pathetic. I can't even clean up some broken glass without your help. How could I ever protect you if you needed me to?"

"Hey, that's not true," she reached up to squeeze his hand. "You're the strongest, bravest, most determined person I know. You wouldn't let anything bad happen to me. I'm sure of it." She smiled through her own tears. "I trust you with my life, Eren."

He let out a choked sob before pulling her up into his arms. Instinctively, she wrapped her own arms around him and buried her head into the warmth of his neck. And for a moment, she just let him hold her as they cried.

"Stay with me," he whispered desperately, lips grazing against her ear.

"Eren," She pulled away. She rested her forehead against his own and let out a shaky breath. "You're drunk."

She felt her heart sink at her own words. He was drunk. Which meant in the morning, things would go back to normal. He wouldn't hold her and tell her how much he cared about then. Really, it was best for both of them if she left now.

"No," he pulled her back against his chest, "please stay with me. Sure, I'm a little drunk, but I know what I'm saying and I know what I'm doing." He pleaded. "I need you, MIkasa, and I care about you. I know I'm no good at telling you or showing you, but what I'm telling you now is true." He whispered, pressing his lips against the top of her head.

"Please, Mikasa," he whispered, "I'll tell you how much I need you and care about you for the rest of my life if that's what it takes. Please…"

She sighed, leaning into his warmth. She could feel her uncertainty slipping away. "Okay, Eren," she spoke softly. For now, she'd believe him.

His lips curved upward into a sad smile as she leaned over to blow out the candle.

"I'll stay,"