Chapter I - No More Miracles
The five of them spent hours in that room before Sarek arrived. Each in its own way, they tried to comfort Kirk, but all efforts were futile. The captain was divided between concern for Bones' life and the increasingly real possibility that Spock would spend the rest of his life without his soul, nothing that his friends said could help. When the ambassador arrived, Kirk was the first to run towards him, torn between demanding answers and the fear he had of receiving them.
"If you can all sit, there is much that I need to..." Sarek began before being interrupted.
"How is Spock? And Bones? What happened?" Kirk asked screaming; trying to shake the ambassador's shoulders, before realizing what he was doing and stop. "Please tell me they are ok." he pleaded with a calmer voice.
"Physically, Spock's health is above average for a Vulcan male of 55 years of age. However, his katra was not reinstated successfully. Dr. McCoy's case has greater complications; never before fal-tor-pan was attempted with a katra carried by a human, unexpected reactions happened. Spock's katra took control of Dr. McCoy's body, who is now convinced that he is dead. He is currently being held in stasis, but this situation can remain indefinitely."
Kirk felt his legs go weak, and was supported by Scotty, which only did more to remind him that Spock or Bones normally would be the ones to support him. He felt like he'd been punched in the stomach, he couldn't breathe. This couldn't be happening, it wasn't possible. After everything that has happened... Was it all in vain? All he could hope for now was to lose his commission and being arrested along with his loyal crew, without his ship, without his son, without his best friend, without... without S-... He couldn't even think about it. This couldn't be happening, couldn't. Not after everything that happened before. What kind of cruel gods would give him a greater miracle than anything he had ever dared to dream just to take it all from him again? How could he go on living when he was so close...
His vision began to darken, this couldn't be happening, no... How could Spock be alive and not be Spock? And Bones... Bones was dying simply for trying to help, it wasn't fair. None of this was fair. Everything was his fault for giving Khan a chance so many years before. It was his fault and he was punished in the worst possible way, nothing happened to him directly. He was punished by losing everything he had; he was punished losing by losing his soul. All because of a mistake made many years ago, all because he wanted to give a dictator without heart a second chance he didn't deserve. Spock, David, the Enterprise and now Bones, all of these deaths were in his conscience, and it was more than he could bear.
With this he collapsed.