Chapter XVI - In the name of what we are
Spock's fingers were cold against his skin, but somehow his brain interpreted the contact as warm. He didn't know how Sarek had managed to make Spock understand what needed to be done, but he had full confidence in both. When Spock's came to meet his, it was unlike anything that he had ever felt before. He wasn't able to remember the number of times that he melded his mind with Spock. Several dozen? A few hundred? But never before his mind was so chaotic, not even during pon farr. He felt consumed by Spock, and for a moment he forgot what he should do, he even forgot who he was. All that mattered was the feeling of being immersed in all that Spock was.
Finally, he managed to concentrate. "Spock" he called in his mind. He could think of nothing else, then concentrated in that single word. "Spock" it was all that mattered, while he was being consumed by the memories and experiences of the other. How to know if it was working? The flow of memories was so intense that he didn't felt when he began to cry. Any distinction that existed between his mind and Spock's had ceased to exist. They were one mind thinking together. At that moment, he knew all about Spock, and he knew Spock also knew all about him. It was different from an ordinary mind meld, there was no barriers between them. It wasn't be possible to meld in a deeper way than this. Some part of his mind that was still working felt satisfaction at the thought that the deep link that Spock had shared years ago with "James" would seem no more than a brush of minds compared to what was happening between them.
It was like experiencing every moment of both their lives at the same time. The experience was too intense. He wouldn't be surprised if his brain was leaking out of his ears and nose. This is illogical, no one could be thinking with a brain liquefied. But it was this way he was feeling. He didn't even realize that Spock was interjecting his thoughts with his, they were a single individual.
It was then that he felt a strong hand pushing him away from Spock. When did they get so close? In what moment they began kissing? He only realized what was happening when he felt Spock's tongue leave his mouth. They were being pushed apart, he couldn't let that happen! He tried to fight the unseen force, he could see nothing.
Sarek was trying to separate the two, he had realized that the meld had been too intense. Both would be lost if he couldn't separate their minds. Spock struggled against him, and they were both well-matched in strength. Kirk, even being human, in his desperation was struggling formidably. They didn't seem to notice any exterior stimulus other than that they were being separated. If he could separate the minds the procedure would be a success. Venturing, he tried to reach Spock's melding points, but failed to hold him still long enough. Then he turned to Kirk. He touched his mind superficially, just to pass a command: "sleep". Through Kirk's mind, the order reached the two, and immediately they were sleeping. As far as he could tell, it had worked. His son was back.