"Derek, I have the stuff." Meredith told him as she shifted nervously.

Derek looked at her with his soft eyes.

"Dad let me duck home. Can you... Can you come with me?" she asked.

Derek smiled. "Ok I've just come from shaving her head. We'll e operating in 2 hours. Don't go wearing her out."

"I won't" she said quietly.

Derek pushed back from his desk and went to her. "Let's show her what she's missed."

"Let's" she responded as her fingers intertwined with his.

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGGAGAGAGGAG

Meredith and Derek arrived at Ellis's room. "You ready?" Derek asked.

Meredith nodded.

Derek knocked lightly on the door before leading Meredith into the room.

Richard looked up and was surprised to see Meredith.



Ellis watched her daughter walk closer. She could tell Meredith was weary.

"You came back." Ellis commented, somewhat surprised and yet relieved.

"I may like to avoid things but I don't run." Meredith replied quietly.

"Oh" Ellis whispered.

"Mer" Richard went to reprimand, but decided to hold back. Instead he asked. "What's on your mind baby girl?"

Meredith looked nervously at her father. "Ummm... I told you I was going home to get some things for mom and I ... ummm... I have them here."

Ellis's eyes widened.

Richard looked at the bag Meredith was carrying. "What did you bring her?"

Derek wrapped and arm around Meredith who was trembling from nerves.

"She... well ... she wanted to know what she missed. So... I ... ummm brought in some things to show her." she stumbled.

Richard nodded.


"What did you bring me?" Ellis asked curiously.

"A lot really." Meredith sighed.

"Well come on then." Ellis gestured.

Derek could feel Meredith's uncertainty. "It's ok Mer, just remember I am here." he whispered in her ear.

Meredith reluctant to break away from Derek stepped closer and put the bag on the bed, causing Ellis to sit up.

Derek stepped up with her before gesturing to the couch.

Meredith took Derek's hand and followed him there.

"It should be enough." Meredith whispered as she shrunk into his embrace.

Ellis looked at Richard and then over to Derek and Meredith.

She warily opened the bag. The first thing she pulled out was Meredith's medical records.

Richard looked over at Meredith confused.

Meredith buried her head into Derek's shoulder.



Ellis unclipped the folder and pulled on a pair of reading glasses.

She sat there looking professional as if she were studying a patient's chart.

"You got a new heart 4 months after I left I see." she noted. "It says here that you were admitted for heart problems again when you were 15. It also says that you had neglected you meds and were border line anorexic. The stress on your heart was massive and you were kept in for months before your doctor was satisfied that you were eating again and that your heart was regaining strength."

Richard looked pained. He had images running through his head of that visit of an exhausted Meredith and her skinniness.

"How could you do that to yourself?" Ellis asked sternly.

Meredith didn't answer.

"It then states that you were monitored regularly until you were admitted a few nights ago. All it says is that you had missed your medication for a few days. Again what were you thinking?"

"Morning sickness." Meredith murmured.

Ellis looked over at Meredith with a stern look.

"Ellis it's not your place to judge." Richard warned her.



"What do you expect? The strain she has put on her heart from neglecting herself..." Ellis said frustrated.

"Don't go there." Derek warned.

"But" Ellis went to protest.

"Do you really want to hear that Meredith blamed herself for you leaving and that the anorexia and refusing her meds was her way of punishing herself for chasing you away from us?" Richard finally asked her.

"What?" Ellis asked in shock.

"What I'm guessing isn't in that bag and her medical records is her psychologist report which not only links her insecurities to your abandonment but also explains all her other issues and that she went through a self destructive phase." Richard advised her.

"Meredith?" Ellis looked over at her daughter who had retreated into Derek's embrace.

Derek looked up and shook his head at her.

The sound of Meredith sobbing finally filled the room.

Ellis sighed as she continued going through the bag of things that Meredith had brought in.