A/N: Wow! Such great comments! I really do appreciate the time you take to review, it really is encouraging. I must apologise for not updating as quickly as usual, I've been a little distracted this week, and I don't know why but I have struggled with a bit of writers block at this point in the story. In fact, I've actually written most of the next chapter whilst struggling along with this one, so the next update shouldn't be too far away.
The chapter title is a line from the Ed Sheeran song "Thinking Out Loud", a song which I just keep playing over and over and over..
Chapter 13 - Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
"Did you really think you were going to get away with it, Vause?"
Alex struggled against the rope around her wrists. She knew that she couldn't escape but her hands seemed to be moving of their own accord. She looked at the man on the other side of the room, his wide smile looked dangerous.
"I wasn't any use to you anymore, my heart wasn't in it," Alex answered.
"Oh!" Kubra moved a little closer to her, "your heart wasn't in it," he nodded his head as though he understood. Alex knew she wasn't getting off so lightly. She knew he was being sarcastic.
"Was your heart in the $70,000 you took with you?"
Alex didn't answer. What could she say? She'd stolen money from the kingpin of an international drugs cartel.
"The Feds are on my case," Kubra told her, he seemed calm, as though this was no big issue. But it was a big issue. If the Feds probed deep enough, they would find Kubra, and they would take him down. And Alex too.
"I simply can't have ex-employees running around the place. You know too much."
Alex swallowed. She could beg for her life, she could promise that she wouldn't talk to the feds but it wouldn't matter, she was a risk and one which Kubra wasn't willing to consider.
"Jitu!" Kubra called. A man entered the room.
"Like I said before, we both know there is only one way out of this business," Kubra reminded Alex of the last conversation they'd had before she ran.
He turned to Jitu, who had now pulled out a pistol and was casually spinning it around his finger. "Clean up the mess when you're done," Kubra spoke as he left the room.
Alex could hear the metallic sound of the gun being loaded and cocked, and then there was a ringing sound. But guns don't ring?
The ringing continued, growing louder. Her assassin came towards her as though he couldn't hear the loud noise. But how could he not hear it?
She was looking down the short barrel of the gun now.. She closed her eyes waiting for it. Still the shrill ringing continued. She wondered whether it was in her head.
Did she dare to open her eyes again? and look down the barrel of the gun before it delivered her quick end?
But nothing happened. She was still alive. Why hadn't he pulled the trigger yet?
Slowly, she opened her eyes and found that she was facing a familiar wall. She blinked and then closed her eyes tightly. Taking a deep breath, she counted down.. three.. two.. one. And forced her eyes open, daring her surroundings to change once more.
They remained the same.
She was in her bedroom.
It had been a dream. Just another bad dream.
Alex sighed in relief, and then winced at the shrill ringing that had woken her. She climbed from her bed and walked to the her door, picking up the intercom.
"What?" she practically barked, still shaken from the dream and paranoid that whoever was waiting for her could be dangerous.
"It's me." A bright, familiar voice answered through the speaker.
"Pipes?" She asked, instant relief swept through her. She buzzed to let Piper into the building and stepped into the hallway, not caring whether any of the neighbours caught sight of her in just her shorts and bra. Piper came into view seconds later, holding up two paper cups of coffee and a brown bag. Alex smiled at her and stepped aside to let the blonde past, following her into the bedroom.
"Breakfast!" Piper announced, she placed the coffee and the brown bag on the bedside table and removed her shoes. Alex climbed under the bed sheets and watched as Piper undressed down to her underwear before slipping in beside her. She pulled her in close, enjoying the soft warmth of her skin as their bodies fit snugly together in a spooning position. "Good morning," she murmured, gently moving aside blonde hair and kissing the exposed skin of her neck.
Piper smiled, feeling lips pressing into her neck, "good morning."
"I thought you were babysitting Larry today?" Alex asked.
"Me too, but he left before I even woke up."
"Did he manage to keep his hands to himself last night or do I have to go kick his sorry ass?" Alex asked, she tried to seem casual, but she couldn't help feeling irritable at the idea of him trying to touch Piper, jealous even that Piper may have wanted it.
"Yes, he was very well behaved," Piper replied, "and apologetic, I think he's just really messed up right now. I really did a number on him."
Alex gritted her teeth, she didn't think that was any excuse for him to put Piper in a position like that. At least he ended up worse off. She nuzzled back into Piper's neck, enjoying the scent of the almond milk shampoo. She pulled the blonde in even closer.
"Mmm, I missed you last night," Alex spoke, her breath tickling Piper's ear. She felt the blonde shiver at her touch, and smirked. They both knew how quickly Piper could come undone at Alex's touch.
"Breakfast is getting cold," Piper warned, though she made no effort to move.
"What is breakfast?" Alex asked. It may have been ungrateful but if Piper had brought her something healthy like a whole-grain muffin then she would rather work off the calories than consume them. Actually, she wasn't sure that it mattered at all what was for breakfast, she wanted Piper more than she wanted food.
"I think you'll like it," Piper encouraged as she felt Alex begin to explore her body with roaming hands.
"I think you'll like it," Alex repeated Piper's words, implying different meaning. She moved a hand beneath Pipers bra, cupping her breast as she moved her thumb in circular motions over the hardened nipple. A sigh escaped from Piper as she moved her neck, giving easier access to Alex's soft lips. Any attempt at fighting the rapidly growing desire would be futile.
"I want you to cum," Alex's raspy voice whispered, her hot breath caressing Piper's ear. It was more than she could bear.
Piper replayed the words in her head as she felt a tongue flick once across her earlobe, she sucked in air, trying to hold herself together. How she wished that she wasn't so easy when it came to Alex. She always had the intention of making her work for it a little harder, but she rarely had the strength to resist her. Alex could seduce her with ease, as though she held some kind of hypnotic power over her.
As soft lips moved down Piper's neck to her shoulders continuing to place kisses along her back, it was enough for Piper to forget about anything else. She turned to face Alex, reached to pull her in and kissed her in one fluid motion.
The kiss deepened immediately, both hungry for more, hands wildly exploring each other. It was a conflict of feelings, of being completely consumed by one another but of wanting more, needing more, unable to get enough. Alex momentarily pulled away to catch her breath, suddenly dizzy at the intensity of their physical and emotional connection. It had always been this way, a force stronger than she could control. It was scary just how deeply she felt it, overwhelming just how much she loved the woman in her arms.
Piper, feeling the need to take control, took this opportunity to push Alex down into the bed. The raven haired made no attempt to fight against her, accepting Piper's dominance. Blue eyes piercing into her, no words required for them to communicate their feelings. This was more than just sex, more than just two people, two bodies moving together. This was something they shared together, something which they felt with only each other, something unique. It was unexplainable, it made no sense at all, and yet it made more sense than anything else in the world.
Alex reached up, cupping Piper's face in the palm of her hand, losing herself in sapphire blue eyes, she guided Piper to meet her, lips touching softly. She felt Piper release her grip on her wrists, moving her hands down to the curves of her chest. Alex quickly released the clasp on her bra before reaching to free Piper from hers, and looked up at the beautiful woman straddling her midriff. Piper wasted no time in resuming contact, closing the distance between them and kissing Alex's full, round breasts. With a smile as she took in the familiar marzipan fragrance, Piper took a rosy pink nipple between her teeth and pulled on it lightly before rolling her tongue over repeatedly over the hardened nub. She moved her hand down and pulled on the fabric of her shorts, Alex complied, slipping the material down her legs and kicking her shorts to the floor. Piper closed the distance between them by capturing Alex's lips in a passionate kiss, she waited a moment before dipping her hand into the wetness between her thighs and feeling Alex moan into her mouth. She began to expertly rub her clit, enjoying how Alex gyrated as she fucked against her hand. Once she felt as though she had teased her enough she pushed deep and hard into Alex and began thrusting in a steady rhythm. As Alex moaned loudly, Piper broke their kiss and moved back down to her tits, roughly taking a nipple into her mouth and flicking her tongue across it in time with the movement of her hand.
"I want to taste you," Piper growled as she moved down her body.
Slowly and gently, she removed her fingers and Alex opened her eyes, watching as Piper slowly licked her wetness from her fingers. The blonde smirked, she knew not to waste any time and ran tongue between soft folds before plunging deeply to taste her. Alex let out a moan at the sensation and involuntarily bucked in need. With the very tip of her tongue, Piper flicked her throbbing clit and roughly pushed her fingers into her, fucking her as hard as she could. The familiar growing burn began, becoming hotter and hotter, her moans increasing in both volume and frequency as she felt herself racing towards climax. She could feel as her own body began to shudder uncontrollably as she rode the waves of orgasm, she could feel it everywhere, she could feel Piper touching her throughout her entire body and then she relaxed, her body limp against the cushions. Revelling in the sensation of relief, she wasn't sure whether she had ever felt so comfortable. She watched as Piper crawled up alongside her and draped an arm lazily across her stomach. She took in a long breath and sighed happily in a dreamlike state. She took her time to recover as Piper cuddled into her, and then returned the favour twice over.
A lazy day ensued soon after. The cold breakfast was replaced by a tower block sandwich in which Alex had practically used anything and everything she could find in the fridge, and a handful of chips for added crunch. Piper laughed at the leaning sandwich when Alex delivered it to the bedroom. Being too hungry and too worn out to complain, she began to devour the sandwich, surprised by how good it tasted.
Alex folded her arms and pursed her lips as Piper finished the sandwich, dipping the last piece of bread into some of the ranch dressing which had dripped onto her plate.
"Much better than all that posh shit that you eat!" the dark haired woman announced proudly.
Piper rolled her eyes, "I'd have eaten a scabby donkey, I was so hungry!"
They finally left the bedroom sometime in the mid afternoon, and spent the afternoon watching films under a blanket. Nikki walked in sometime in the early evening with Lorna in tow. Alex watched the pair wondering whether there would be any tension but it was as though the other evening hadn't happened, Nikki was back to her usual self and Lorna was happily chatting away to Piper.
Having no family, and no contact with any of her old friends had sometimes made Alex feel a little disconnected from the world, but as she chatted and laughed with the three women, it felt a little like how she thought having a family around her would feel. She loved both Nikki and Piper in very different ways, and though Nikki and Lorna had their issues to work through, she liked Lorna a lot too.
Lorna offered to cook and spent an hour in the kitchen routing through the fridge and the cupboard, impressed that they at least had fresh ingredients like onions and garlic. Piper assisted with some of the chopping as the petite Italian complained that she could barely see through her weeping eyes as she struggled with the onion. Nikki had made sure that Piper was aware that they would not be sitting around the kitchen counter, and so they all took their servings of spaghetti and bolognaise and moved back around the kitchen.
Just as the sky had began to darken, Piper disappeared from the room only to reappear shortly after changed out of her pyjamas and in jeans and a t-shirt.. "I'm just popping out for supplies for tonight," she announced, planting a quick kiss on Alex, who looked perplexed.
"Supplies?"
Nikki scoffed, "lube!"
Piper rolled her eyes, "not lube, just a few things."
Alex tried to think about what she could possibly need to go to the store for, "what are we doing tonight?"
Nikki gave a cough although it sounded a lot like the words 'strap-on'.
"We're going out." Piper spoke, ignoring Nikki.
"We are?" Alex asked, being curled up on the sofa in sweat pants, she far too comfortable to consider moving.
Piper smiled, "yes, you don't need to change, we aren't going anywhere... public" she thought as she tried to describe where they were going without giving anything away.
"Dogging," Nikki commented.
Alex looked at Piper with curiosity, she hadn't mentioned any plans for this evening, and it was dark now, where could they possibly be going which wasn't "public" at this time of the day. Didn't Piper know how dangerous L.A could be come night time, especially in the less public areas..
"Where are you taking me?" Alex asked as the Piper continued to put more and more distance between the twinkling lights of L.A and the rocky, winding dark road ahead.
"You will see," Piper smiled.
Alex wasn't too fond of surprises, she liked to be in control. But she trusted Piper enough to let her take control, in more ways than one.
They appeared to be in a desert of sorts, sand clouded up behind them, glowing under the car lights. They were moving gradually higher, and definitely further away from the smog of the city. The sky was becoming clearer and as the city lights began to fade away, Alex could just about see the blinking of stars above.
Alex looked out of the window at the rock formations they passed along the winding road. There were no other cars insight ahead or behind them. She couldn't think where Piper would be taking her at this time of night, this far away from the city. Further was her surprise when Piper slowed the car and pulled into a gravel pull off.
"Are we lost?" Alex asked as she looked around.
"Did you have Larry in the trunk or something?" She asked, "Because I know, I know I used to supply drugs to junkies, and money launder, and god knows what other crimes, but burying a dead body was never part of my repertoire."
Piper gave Alex one of her classic eye rolls and shook her, "no, this is where we are having our date."
She laughed as Alex looked around at their location in distaste.
"What was wrong with my apartment?" Alex asked, "it's much more comfortable… much less.. Horror movie."
"Live a little Vausemouse, didn't you once travel the world?"
"Yes, in hotels," she pointed out, "in you know, well-lit, populated areas."
Piper scoffed, "cities filled with prostitutes and poverty," she reminded her of some of the less glamorous sights they had seen during their travels together.
"So, why here?" Alex asked.
Piper climbed out of the car and headed to the trunk.
"Because there's nobody else here."
"You took me into the middle of the Californian desert for privacy?"
"And clarity."
"Clarity? Ok kid, now you've lost me."
Piper passed Alex a folded chair, slung a canvas bag over her own shoulder and carried her own chair over the gravel, leading the way. They walked for a few minutes until Piper placed down her chair, and slid the bag from her shoulder. "Here," she announced. Alex unfolded her chair and placed it beside Pipers.
"Here?"
Piper nodded, "seems as good a place as any," she spoke with a smile, enjoying that she had confused Alex. Things were a little different now, before Alex had always been so in control, she knew where they were going, how they would get there, which passports they needed, everything. Piper had always just followed her, going along with whatever plans the darker haired woman had made, because she had trusted that she knew best. But now, Alex was in the back seat of Piper's ride, and Piper was calling the shots. Alex would never have allowed this before, she would always take over, always.
"Ok," Alex said and she sat down on the chair staring ahead at the outline of some rock formations and darkness.
Piper smiled. Alex claimed that she was just the same as before, but she wasn't. She was still Alex, but her edges had softened, and she was much less selfish, much less domineering. Lust and money had always been her main driving forces, but now she seemed to have matured a little, she seemed to love and trust Piper in a way she could never have done back then.
Taking a seat beside her, Piper reached out for Alex's hand.
"This is the weirdest place that anybody has ever taken me," Alex said as she turned to look at Piper.
"I have my reasons," Piper smiled. She routed around in the canvas bag and pulled out a bottle of beer and a bottle opener, she passed them to Alex and took a bottle of iced tea out for herself. She positioned the drink between her legs as she pulled out a bag of chips, and a box of cookies.
"A much better picnic," Alex smiled, reaching for the chips.
"Look up," Piper instructed Alex.
Alex looked up to find that they were sat under the light of a thousand stars.
"I don't even remember the last time I saw a star that wasn't engraved into a sidewalk," Alex spoke as she looked up above her. She had never been one for looking up, growing up with the light pollution in New York had meant that she had never really noticed the stars there either.
Piper pulled out her phone and loaded an app which used GPS to locate their position, she lifted the phone to face the stars and it showed her the constellation. She and Alex moved the phone around, picking out the different constellations. Alex watched Piper as she stared up above, "it's amazing to think that we can actually see something which isn't even part of our world."
"It's amazing just how small the world can be sometimes," Alex reached out for the phone and slipped it into her jeans pocket. Piper looked after her and reached to retrieve the phone, but found that instead she was pulled into the taller woman, and in just seconds their lips were pressed together. Alex cupped her face, kissing her tenderly.
Dazed, Piper stood on the spot, her eyes closed, even when the kiss had ended.
"It's nice to be nowhere with you," Alex told her, her expression now serious "I'd go anywhere with you, do you know that?"
"It used to be the other way around," Piper commented, remembering just how readily she had packed up and left her life to follow Alex around the world.
They sat back into their chairs, hands held as they looked up at the sky.
"When I left," Piper began, "I thought I would never see you again, at first that was exactly what I wanted. Not because I didn't love you, but because I did. And I knew that if I saw you again, if I ever looked back, I would give it all up again, I would stay with you while you became more involved in your work and less involved in me, and I would just wait, and hope for something to change."
"Piper, I- " Alex had wanted to apologise for her behaviour towards the end of their relationship, but piper stopped her from interrupting.
"One night a few weeks after I'd moved back to New York, I was sat on Polly's balcony, and she was twittering on about something, trying to distract me from thinking about you, I suppose.. but I couldn't help but wonder where you were, and I noticed the moon. No stars. Just the bright light of the moon. And I thought about how, no matter where you are in the world, you can see the moon. And I wondered whether you were looking at the moon too, although I knew you wouldn't, I pretended that you were. It was nice to know there was still something in my world that existed in your world too."
Alex considered Piper's words for a moment. The practical part of her wanted to point out that there was also the sun, the life source for the entire planet. But instead, she followed Pipers gaze to the the moon above. The vast darkness that engulfed the sky, and there shining from hundreds of thousands of miles away they could see the bright white orb of moon. She gave Pipers have a squeeze, silently telling her that she understood. Wherever they were in the world, even if the sun rose and set at different times, if they looked out into the darkness, no matter where that darkness was or what was hidden there, they were able to see the same bright moon. It connected them.
"That's quite poetic, Pipes," Alex spoke at last.
"I have my moments," Piper smiled.
"Did you really think about me that often?"
"I did," Piper sighed, "You managed to get on my nerves even when you weren't in the same continent," she gave Alex a playful nudge.
"That reminds me, I'll have to have a look for it but I bought you something while I was on the run in Europe."
"You bought me something? But how did you know we would see each other again?"
Alex shrugged, "I didn't."
"You're not as badass as you like people to think," Piper commented.
"Maybe," Alex tipped her beer back with a smile.
"Do you know what, we haven't had the conversation," Piper spoke, trying to keep her tone casual.
"What conversation?"
"The conversation.."
Alex looked at her blankly. "I'm sorry, but I think you're going to have to be a bit more specific."
"You know, about us, about where we are.."
Alex blinked. She took another look at the surroundings and then she spoke slowly, "you brought me here, to the desert, to look at the stars and the moon and shit."
Piper rolled her eyes, she knew that Alex must have understood that she didn't mean geographically.
"I mean, you know, are we getting back together?"
Alex smirked, she watched Piper as she took another long drink from her bottle.
"I'll think about it."
Piper stared at her, lips slightly parted as she struggled for a response.
"I'm joking, I'm joking," Alex laughed her raspy laugh, "are you going to run away again?" she asked, she was being playful but it was a secret fear of hers, and Piper knew it.
"Are you going to abandon me in favour of pushing heroin?"
"Ouch," Alex feigned being burned by her words.
Piper gave her a tight lipped smile, "no, I'm not going to do another runner."
"Hmm.." Alex said, pretending to consider her options, "well, I suppose we could give it another go..."
"Alex!" Piper playfully punched her in the arm, "be serious!"
"Ok, ok," Alex smiled, "Piper Chapman, will you be my girlfriend?"
Piper smiled back happily, "I will."
She had planned to be the one to ask, but it hadn't happened that way. Sometimes, especially with Alex, words had a funny way of escaping her. Sometimes she could be so eloquent, and describe the thoughts in her mind with ease, and other times it felt as thought her brain was a sieve and the thoughts were draining away faster than she had a chance to catch them. Alex, while often quite careful with her emotions, had never seemed to struggle for words in the same way as Piper, she always remained calm, and spoke directly, sometimes even bluntly, with little regard for other people's feelings. Whilst she would protect her heart with defences that had taken Piper a long time, and a lot of patience and perseverance to bring down, she was always honest.
Alex shifted in her chair a little, turning to look back up at the moon. She'd never paid it much attention, but Piper had given the moon some meaning, it was no longer just a white glowing ball in the night sky. She smiled as blue eyes came into view, and then soft lips pressed against hers. She wrapped her arms around Piper as the woman sat in her lap and it occurred to her how before Piper, and after Piper, her life had been just an existence but with Piper.. With Piper, she felt she had purpose.
"Thank you," Alex spoke as she hugged Piper tightly.
"What for?"
"For coming back."